1 – 20 of 101 Works in Dumb Hockey Boys

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  1. not "your' anything by

    Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
    • M

    2026-10-22

    SHANE: Lily.
    LILY: Hello
    SHANE: Dead to me.
    What the actual fuck?
    LILY: ??
    SHANE: what. The. Hell. Did. You. Do.
    LILY: ahh
    I am in trouble
    Yes?

     
    Or Ilya's teammates add "Jane" to the Boston WAG group chat in the height of their "no, we aren't falling in love, whatever do you mean" era (2014-2016-ish?).

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    72,113
    Chapters:
    31/?
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #81424231

  2. hit or miss by

    Heated Rivalry (TV)
    • E

    2026-10-14

    Finally, something dawns on him, a way to handle two goals simultaneously. He’d seen Hollander’s mother flipping through papers rapidly when they first got here, seeming calm and in control and more than a little frightening in a way that made Ilya mildly glad he wasn’t one of the people responsible for a clipboard. If anyone can tell him if the long list of “Prohibited Items” he’d been sent in his email a few days ago is just standard practice for big shoots, it would be Yuna Hollander.

    Or, hopefully, her son.

    “Crazy we cannot even have peanut butter, eh?” He asks. “You also got giant list?”

    Hollander stiffens, almost imperceptibly, and Ilya tilts his head, just slightly, confused, wondering if he’s stumbled somewhere unexpected.

    (how ilya learns about shane's allergies) (and shane's sexual awakening tragically hits a speedbump in the process 😔)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    113,156
    Chapters:
    10/?
    Files:
    2 versions
    AO3:
    #87705801

  3. No, really! I have a boyfriend! by

    Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
    • G
    • ✓

    2026-09-24

    "Where were you this weekend, cap? We missed you at the barbecue."

    "I was at my boyfriend Shane Hollander's house."

    "Okay then! Keep your secrets, cap!"

    --
    No one believes Ilya that he's dating Montreal player Shane Hollander.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,489
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #93204391

  4. HockeyExpert1410 has posted a new review! by

    Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
    • M

    2026-09-19

    When the lesbian next to him at the bar very kindly informs Shane that (other) women have been throwing themselves at him all evening, he's surprised. How was he supposed to know factual statements about the temperature of the room were meant to invite a proposition?!

    Her solution? Studying romantic social cues and flirting techniques. The textbook? Romance novels.

    Well, it can't hurt to try, and anything Shane tries, he tries thoroughly. Maybe a little too thoroughly? He didn't expect for his book reviews to pick up a following, and he DEFINITELY didn't expect to become the (secret, anonymous) face of "allyship" in the MLH.

    He's not complaining, though. The books resonate with him more than he ever could have predicted, even if the hockey is unrealistic as shit, and maybe he'll learn a thing or two along the way. (About healthy relationships, communication, and emotional intelligence. Not any of the OTHER things you'll find in a hockey romance. Nope. Not at all...)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,963
    Chapters:
    6/?
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #88764076

  5. ass-thetic by

    Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types, Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
    • T
    • ✓

    2026-09-14

    Hazy: Okay, I just talked with Harris.

    Hazy: Ugly pants exchange for the next away game is a go.

    Shane: Didn't we just do this?

    Shane: Are we really going to subject ourselves to this again?

    Bood: Those were shirts, Hollander. 👕

    Bood: These are pants. 👖

    Bood: See the difference?

    Shane: There is not enough difference in the world to make me want to do this again.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,481
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #92205421

  6. Accidentally, Mine by

    Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types, Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
    • E
    • !

    2026-08-28

    "You sure about this?” Pike asked as Ilya made it to the door.

    The scent was so strong here it felt like Ilya was walking through a cloud of aerosolized candy. It felt sticky on his skin, in his hair. Ilya could feel the warm flush on the tops of his ears, across his cheeks. He blinked a few times, letting the beta’s words sink in. “Yes, fine,” he growled back.

    Thankfully, it didn’t seem like Pike was affected at all, thanks to his scent-blind beta nose. “So… there’s no easy way to say this,” the man said nervously. “The guys totally fucked up.” He handed over a plain black wallet.

    Ilya opened it, found the Boston College ID card and pulled it out. A handsome Asian boy looked back at him. He had short black hair, warm golden skin, and dark eyes. There was a shadow stretched across his cheeks, something Ilya couldn’t quite make out in the tiny picture. Shane Hollander, the card read. Sophmore. 

    “How the hell do they make this mistake?” Ilya half-shouted. He snarled again, fought against it, got his face under control. “Fuck.” 

    “Yeah,” Pike agreed. “Fuck.”

    ---

    Sometimes the first step in finding true love is to accidentally kidnap the wrong guy.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    27,955
    Chapters:
    7/?
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #88577546

  7. With All My Heart by

    Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types, Heated Rivalry (TV)
    • E
    • !
    • ✓

    2026-08-27

    “Well…” Ilya grinned mischievously, “I know you were upset about not getting a nice WAG basket. I am not sure if I did this right, though.” He stood up and grabbed the first and smallest basket and handed it to Shane who was still sitting on the couch. Nowadays most women just sent everything in a cardboard box. Ilya’s basket looked like one of the ones at the grocery store near Easter time, but tiny. It was woven and clumsily wrapped in cellophane. “The woman at the store said I needed a bag to put the basket in. I do not see the point of this, but for you I wanted the best, so I bought the bags.”

    or

    Long distance relationships are hard. Long distance relationships when no one knows you’re in one are the hardest. Shane and Ilya find creative ways to stay connected using the tradition of WAG baskets given to Voyageurs' players before playoffs.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    51,574
    Chapters:
    23/23
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #91422661

  8. "ilya rozanov let me eat that ass like a fucking sausage mcgrittle" by

    Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
    • M
    • ✓

    2026-08-22

    HARRIS: Today you’ll be reading thirst tweets about the other.

    HOLLANDER: No.

    ROZANOV, delighted: Oh! This will be fun.

    HOLLANDER: No way.

    HOLLANDER stands up.

    HOLLANDER: Where’s Barrett? He can do this.

    HOLLANDER actively walks off-set.

    or, in an unreleased video the ottawa centaur's read out thirst tweets in pairs and they all learn quite a lot they probably shouldn't have known about each other

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,107
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #91117126

  9. Best of Seven by

    Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
    • T
    • ?

    2026-08-17

    “I’ve been looking at Twitter,” Ilya said, one hand on the wheel and the other playing with the hair at the nape of Shane’s neck. It wasn’t doing much to calm the stiffness in his shoulders. “Is not so bad, most people are more mad at your GM than you. It helps that everything is so mysterious.”

    “Really?” Pava asked, his head appearing from the backseat. “I see people very mad at him.”

    “Not helping, Pava.”

    * * *

    Shane Hollander moves to Boston and tries to find his place on a new team. In some ways, it's more difficult than he expected.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    38,883
    Chapters:
    3/4
    Files:
    2 versions
    AO3:
    #85788391

  10. Husband Shenanigans by

    Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
    • ?

    2026-08-11

    Now that Shane is officially a player on the Ottawa Centaurs, Ilya demands to be added to the WAG chat too.
    Chaos ensues.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,014
    Chapters:
    7/?
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #83190836

  11. Oh, It's so Hard to Have Someone to Love by

    Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types, Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
    • E
    • ✓

    2026-08-09

    “Who are you waiting for? Maybe I can call him and get him here, then we go?”

    Hollander’s face scrunched up, and he hummed like he was trying to remember who he was waiting for.

    “Ilya.”

    “Yes?”

    “Yeah. Ilya.”

    Ilya blinked.

     What?

    “Yes, is my name. Who are you waiting for?”

    Hollander huffed and pushed himself up a little so he could glare Ilya down.

    “‘M waitin’ for Ilya. Roz’nov. Y’know ‘im?”

    “Yes, Hollander. I know him,” Ilya said, trying to keep his voice even.

     

    OR: The Voyageurs are in Boston for a game, and Shane is really struggling being in Rozanov's city after he left him on his couch. He goes out and gets drunk. Ilya finds out Shane is alone at a club and too drunk to stand and can't fight the urge to help him out.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,806
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #90008991

  12. Your girlfriend/who lives in Canada/Is her name Alberta? (a prequel to O Lady Jane) by

    Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
    • T
    • ✓

    2026-08-04

    Hammer: i bet shes way out of his league
    Hammer: bro i cant wait to meet her

    St. Vicky: ngl id like to see whos keeping roz on a leash

    CC: same bro

    Before the events of O Lady Jane, the Best Boston Bros find out that Roz has been hooking up with the same girl in Canada.

    Set pre-Tuna Meltdown during the situationship years. Sebbin is Roz’s rookie and suffers for everyone.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,137
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #89833466

  13. Long airplane flights and long nights before by

    Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
    • E

    2026-08-04

    The team has an away game, on the way there one thing is noticable Luca and Young are very close but something changes after they celebrate their win.
    When they get back to their airport, the two rookies are avoiding each other and refusing to meet the other's eyes.
    Something clearly happened...

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,212
    Chapters:
    2/3
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #89763751

  14. The Blueprint by

    Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
    • M
    • ✓

    2026-08-03

    After Shane comes out, the Metros become convinced he might be attracted to them.

    Shane corrects this assumption with devastating precision, accidentally describes Ilya Rozanov in the process, and somehow turns the entire locker room into a deranged pageant of heterosexual insecurity.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    35,048
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #86901701

  15. Ruin the Rivalry by

    Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
    • T
    • ✓

    2026-07-27

    After a very illuminating conversation with Cliff Marleau on a night out, Carter Vaughn decides the rivalry is getting rather ridiculous. The tension between Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov is clearly at an all-time high.

    Which is why he makes a plan for the All Stars Game in 2017, recruiting a group of hockey players to help him.

    But in one thing Carter is very clear. Those two need to fuck it out.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,465
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #89288991

  16. The Wired Autocomplete Interview by

    Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types, Heated Rivalry (TV)
    • ✓

    2026-07-26

    HOLMBERG, reading: “Who are the Ottawa Foals?”

    YOUNG: This makes us sound like a YouTube dude-bro house.

    LEVIN: The hottest men in the league.

    JONES: We all know it’s Shane. You know it’s Shane based on the fact you have a [BEEP]in’ poster of him on your door.

    LAPOINTE: The Ottawa Foals is the name of the young core on the Ottawa Centaurs. It is mostly rookie players still on Entry Level Contracts but I am on my extension contract with the Cens. So I’m not a rookie anymore.

    or, the foals do the wired autocomplete interview. luca has a miserable time

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,979
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #89297621

  17. Shane's cousin George by

    Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
    • E
    • ✓

    2026-07-25

    ‘What is the song about, uncle George?’

    Shane listens, transfixed, as Rozanov on the other side of the speaker explains to the yawning twins that the song he was singing was his mother’s favourite. He deflects when they ask what the song is about and if they can learn it. There is something in the way he says it that tugs at Shane’s heart.

    ‘I can maybe teach you something else, da? Is like a poem, something I learned when I was small like you?’ he offers another suggestion and the girls sound delighted. Shane doesn’t have the heart to complain that they should be sleeping, not learning poems and that it’s long past midnight already.

    OR

    When a night destined to be a hookup turns to an unexpected babysitting emergency, Shane gets to know his rival in ways he wasn’t really ready for. So does Ilya.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,009
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #89232791

  18. O Lady Jane, Where Art Thou? by

    Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
    • T
    • ✓

    2026-07-20

    Marly: hes head was not in the game that night for sure

    CC: maybe he played like trash and she dumped him?
    CC: shes got to be a hockey fan
    CC: cant imagine cap dating someone who doesnt like hockey

    Marly: nah he was in a mood that day before the game

    St. Vicky: so what you think she dumped him just before the game?
    St. Vicky: bro thats brutal

    Hammer: maybe shes a voyageur sleeper agent

    The Boston Bears band together to find Montreal Jane and win her back for their beloved Captain. They are dumb but their love is pure.

    Loosely inspired by Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Dead with the same amount of crack but without any of the literary merit. Set post-Tuna Meltdown.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,689
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #87551491

  19. daddy's back by

    Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
    • T
    • ✓

    2026-07-18

    Shane: You all seriously want to do this?

    Shane: Like you know this is going to be on the internet forever, right?

     

    Ilya: Sorry everyone.

    Ilya: He still has this weird sense of self-preservation.

    Ilya: We're working on it.

     

    Bood: Come on, Hollander.

    Bood: It'll be fun!

    Bood: We'll all look like idiots together.

     

    Shane: That's not as comforting as you think it is.

     

    Evan: Is there a limit on the number of rainbows and dicks that can be on the shirt?

    Evan: Asking for the person I'm buying for who maybe definitely is named Shane Hollander.

     

    Shane: I hate all of you.

     

    Ilya: See you at the airport!! ✈️👕🏒

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,096
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #88723891

  20. Chernobog by

    Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
    • E
    • !
    • ✓

    2026-07-16

    The week before the 2017 All-Star Game, Ilya Rozanov is placed on IR. Ten days later, he disappears from the league entirely. Boston says nothing, and for once, a notoriously fickle league closes ranks.

    Every attempt Shane makes to find him hits a wall. In one last desperate, life-altering bid to reach him, Shane comes out to the world, only to be met with Ilya’s silence.

    By the time the 2020/21 season begins, Shane has nothing left but hockey and regret. He builds a dynasty, guts his life, and pins the last scraps of his hope on the Metros’ newest transfer, the dangerously hot-headed Cliff Marlow.

    Stepping back into the public eye after the worst three years of his life, all Ilya wants is to find some kind of purpose. Shane is done with him, he made that much clear. Ilya isn't about to try to convince himself otherwise. He just wants to prove he still has some use left in him.

    Fortunately for both of them, they're still fucking stupid for each other.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    279,247
    Chapters:
    36/36
    Files:
    3 versions
    AO3:
    #81325346
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