1 – 20 of 27 Works in Shane Hollander is a Little Shit

  • Shane Hollander is a Little Shit ×
  1. SHANE: Lily.
    LILY: Hello
    SHANE: Dead to me.
    What the actual fuck?
    LILY: ??
    SHANE: what. The. Hell. Did. You. Do.
    LILY: ahh
    I am in trouble
    Yes?

     
    Or Ilya's teammates add "Jane" to the Boston WAG group chat in the height of their "no, we aren't falling in love, whatever do you mean" era (2014-2016-ish?).

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    72,113
    Chapters:
    31/?
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #81424231
  2. Penelope (Dill)
    Omg get on with it, Cass!

    Cassie (Bood)
    Thank you
    Now, we must behave ourselves, ladies
    We have royalty in our midst

    Arden (Pointy)
    What the hell are you on about, Cassie?

    Cassie (Bood) has added Jane (Rozy) to the conversation

    Jane (Rozy)
    Uhh
    What is this?
    ______________
    or; "Jane" gets added to the Ottawa WAGs chat after Ilya drunkenly tells his teammates about "her"
    or or; Shane Hollander in his WAG era

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    34,991
    Chapters:
    18/20
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #85301686
  3. @SophiaSkatesBoston:

    I bought a FanMail from Ilya Rozanov for a laugh, thinking it must be an admin error to even have him listed but...

    [Video clip begins]

    Ilya Rozanov stands against a bare white wall, wearing athletic shorts and a tank top.

    “Sophia,” he says, faux serious, “thank you for requesting a birthday video. As you can see, I am taking this all very seriously. I have good neutral background, very plain, very boring. Very professional. Does not contain anything that would make the commissioner very angry. Is just a blank wall, I have checked. Because I consider the set up of my shots. I would hate to send happy birthday video with very big, very distracting secret in the background. Would be very unprofessional, very...”

    [Tap to keep watching]

    @CentaursCentral:

    Oh my God, he did not! I laughed so hard at this I think I pulled something.

    @NHL_OffTheRink:

    If you do one thing on hockey twitter today, let it be watching this video.

    @OttawaAlways:

    Ok but has Hayden Pike seen this yet? Does he know?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,243
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #92261491
  4. What if after tuna melts, whispered names and the Rose of it all - in a post All Stars Game world - Shane thinks the world is finally starting to make sense again to him. Once the ground is firm under his feet - or so he thinks anyway - it's turns out to be less than stable? What if when Shane was getting his hook ups in Mexico and Hollywood - he wasn’t as unnoticed as he had originally thought?

    When Montreal shows it’s true colors sooner, a No Trade Clause is waived and Boston gets an opportunity to build a dynasty that rivals the one of their largest rivals up North.

    What if Shane and Ilya’s worlds are turned upside down and things with their over 8 year long situationship (now maybe relationship?) suddenly got more complicated and somehow simplified at the same time? Shane honestly thinks this is possibly the most ‘them’ resolution to a situation he has ever found. Ilya is just doing his best - he thinks. Maybe.

    Also, the Power Play in Boston is about to be the thing of nightmares, if a certain Russian can stop blocking Shane's damn shot…

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    77,026
    Chapters:
    9/?
    Files:
    3 versions
    AO3:
    #78306226
  5. Ilya’s voice dimmed, “Shane, what’s going on? Are you okay?” he sounded eager, but also sounded like that he would wait years if Shane even gave him one word in return. Shane aggressively shook his head, the hum only growing. “I need to-“ No. No, this wasn’t happening. He wouldn’t let this happen. Shane slowly sunk down to the kitchen floor, feeling the nooks in the drawers of the counters scratch against his back while his eyes shut tightly. He wasn’t going to cry. He wasn’t a fucking baby. Shane was strong. And he was strong enough to make this stop. OR: Shane Hollander experiences a meltdown infront of Ilya.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,165
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #91139036
  6. Compromising pictures surface after Ilya Rozanov’s phone is hacked. Determined not to let his Russian situationship face the fall-out of getting outed, Shane Hollander comes out, starts Twitter fights, and commits to acting unhinged on main, enlisting the help of a few trusted allies.
    His objective? To become the bigger news story so as to draw attention away from Rozanov, in an insane bid to distract Russia from coming for his... whatever they are to each other.
    Whoever said you can’t singlehandedly change an entire narrative has clearly never met Shane Hollander.

    • Part 5 of
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,272
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #87552201
  7. Kip grabs Scott's thigh as he watches Shane lick his lips before tucking his smile back between his teeth. Rozanov meets Shane's eyes from across the room, heated and promising something. Kip feels crazy looking at it being reminded of the tension of their face offs. Shane's eyes drop back to the bland chicken on his plate, and Kip is ready to write this off as a figment of his imagination, when Rozanov catches his eye now and winks.

    Scott is going to have five tiny bruises on his thigh. But that doesn't seem to bother him. "Everything okay?"

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,408
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #87641951
  8. Boodram: ???
    Hayes: huh?
    LaPointe: what
    Boyle: What is happening?
    Chouinard: wtf?
    Dykstra: the hell is happening here?
    Barrett: No offence but why is Hollander in here?

    Shane gets added to the Centaurs Group Chat. Ilya might have forgotten to mention a few things to his team.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,166
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #87318161
  9. "What is your problem?" Shane demanded, his voice sounding thinner than he liked, laced with the exhaustion of the night. "I gave up our bedroom and the guest room and now you're here". He heard the rustle of fabric as Ilya settled onto the far end of the couch, claiming his territory with his infuriating, unspoken intensity. "We sleep in same place no matter what," Ilya murmured, the low, steady vibration of his voice hitting Shane somewhere deep. "So stay put or I follow you around home".

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,871
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #86030286
  10. It started off slow, one shirt here, one shirt there, a sweatshirt, even a few pairs of underwear just to wear his alpha's scent on him. Or Shane steals Ilya's shirts and Ilya feels some sort of way.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,968
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #85585861
  11. coach’s daughter by

    Heated Rivalry (TV)
    • M
    • ?
    • ✓

    2026-04-24

    When Coach Brandon Wiebe gets the call that his mother is sick, and he immediately has to fly to Louisiana to see her, he realizes that someone needs to take care of his 16 year old daughter Clara for the week. Shane and Ilya immediately agree to help, wanting to be there for Coach. But they quickly discover Clara is more than just the coach’s daughter, she’s a hockey genius herself.

    *COMPLETED*

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    216,892
    Chapters:
    25/25
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #80709936
  12. HARRIS: Triple B?

    CAITLIN: Boring

    CASSIE: Bummer

    LISA: BIG FAT ASS

    More Real Housewives shenanigans

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,969
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #83634301
  13. Scott watched as Hollander leaned in, further, to hear Rozanov. This was the part that didn’t entirely make sense to him. The missing piece of something that felt like it was just beyond his reach. This was quiet ease and small moments of comfort and a look that makes the rest of the world fade away. This was how he felt with Kip.

    Scott stilled.

    It was as if someone had whispered it in his ear. It was as if the final piece of this insane, deranged puzzle finally clicked into place. His heart was pounding in his ears. He was probably wrong. In fact he was entirely wrong. This wasn’t like him and Kip. It couldn’t be Kip. Scott had been watching too many romantic comedies. His head was in the clouds.

    But they weren’t touching.

    Hollander and Rozanov were as close as they could be, without laying a single finger on one another. They were specifically, rigidly, separate. The warmth between them was bridled. Entirely. And this, Scott realized, his heart sinking into the floor, was also how he had felt with Kip.

    Oh. Oh fuck.

    ---
    OR: Scott Hunter figures out Shane and Ilya are together at the NHL award ceremony and tries (and fails) not to freak out about it

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,146
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #82346716
  14. JANE: So, I am currently on FaceTime with Ilya

    NICOLE: Are your clothes on?

    LISA: Nikki asking the important questions

    JANE: It's not important to what I am trying to tell you

    CASSIE: So they're not on, got it

    Or, the in-between messages from Real Housewives of Ottawa

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,937
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #83019276
  15. Shane does not know what he is staring at when he reads the name of the chat and the influx of texts.

    This looks like actual hell, and more importantly why on earth would Ilya add him to the Boston WAGS chat?

    TLDR: In an attempt to socialise in this new country Ilya puts 'jane' down as his WAG to connect to the team, this has unforeseen consequences for himself.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    60,166
    Chapters:
    17/17
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #78774506
  16. It starts as an accident.

    Shane’s focused, eyes locked on the ice. He isn’t thinking about anything else, let alone his response when an inevitable chirp comes. He doesn’t understand he's done anything different until later in the locker room. Ilya can’t stop talking about some chirp and Shane is only half listening until he hears his name.

    “What?” He looks up with a frown. “I didn’t chirp anyone.”

    “Shane, lyubimii, love of my life.” Ilya steps forward to press a smacking kiss to Shane’s forehead. “You error-screened Benoit!”

    So it starts by accident, but it doesn’t take Shane very long to lean into it. He loves Ilya. The entire League knows they’re married, and it isn’t that hard to believe that a married couple would be having sex. 

    Or: Five times Shane chirped back at comments about his relationship, plus the one time he didn't

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,188
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #81028836
  17. 5 times Shane Hollander privately walks Ilya Rozanov like and dog, and 1 time he does it publicly.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,391
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #82120316
  18. Carter Vaughn (NY):

    You know all of a sudden Hollanders lack of texts seems really ominous

    You good there @Hollander

    You:

    No

    No I am not because one of the stupid fucking 19 year olds I’m somehow responsible for decided not to wear his bloody mouthguard at afternoon skate and the absolute dumbass took a stick to the face

    So now I’m sitting in the ER waiting for him to get back from xray because of course its the one rookie who isn’t with a billet family 

    Why are they like this?

    Lily:

    Their mothers didn't drop them on their heads enough as babys so the universe decided to do it for them

    -

    When Montreal and Boston name two 20 year olds as their captains, Scott Hunter decides that they could probably do with somewhere to turn to for advice.

    Four years later, he doesn't quite know if he regrets that or not.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,574
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #80449506
  19. Set after Shane comes out to his team. Now that more and more people find out he is gay, he is also getting a lot more male attention.
    Meanwhile Ilya gets progressively more jealous and wants to remind everyone exactly who Shane Hollander belongs to.
    Also they're idiots in love

    or

    5 times Shane had to reject a guy giving him attention
    +1 time everyone found out why

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,325
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #80986741
  20. When the Centaur's plane goes down in early 2021, Shane is left a shell of who he once was. When he dies in an accident months later, he is reunited with his Ilya... in 2008.
    This fic is a series of moments as they live through to 2021 again, but they make things a little easier on themselves and for the people around them. The first chapter is Shane's POV, taking place in the early years. Second chapter is Kip's POV as the hockey world shifts around the phenomenon that is Hollanov.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,021
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #80249641
  1. 1
  2. 2
  3. Next →