1 – 18 of 18 Works in Shane Hollander is So Done

  • Shane Hollander is So Done ×
  1. Mere minutes after the Montreal Voyageurs announce their captain, and most adored man in all of Canada, is being benched, local group chats have lit up brighter than an unregulated aftermarket headlight on a lifted truck. Will homophobia be defeated by the only thing more powerful in the world of sports; alcoholic uncles who totally could've gone pro if they didn't pull a muscle right before the scouts showed up for Juniors?

    Or

    The city of Montreal riots over Shane Hollander being benched after the FanMail leak.

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  2. He stopped three feet short of Theriault, skipping any kind of greeting. "You're fired."

    Theriault blinked, his mouth dropping open, but before he could muster a single word, Marius raised his right arm. He pointed an index finger across the blue line painted on the carpet, zeroing in on two specific stalls near the back bench.

    "Cameau. Drapeau. You two are traded. Get your personal stuff out of your lockers and leave the team gear right there."

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  3. When Shane realizes that his whole team isn't actually all that ok with him being gay he decides that he's done waiting and making others comfortable at the price of his own happiness.

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  4. Marly: Roz
    Marly: Roz
    Marly: Roz
    Marly: I think I’m bilingual 

    **

    J.J. and Marly hook up after a Boston and Montreal match, effectively discovering that they are both bisexual. Unfortunately, they could not figure this out themselves, and Ilya and Shane are woken up at the ass crack of dawn to help with their friends' inability to process their feelings.

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  5. “Well, I guess you got what you wanted from me already,” Hollander continued. “Whatever. Fuck you.”

    “Wait, no, Hollander.” Ilya turned, throwing an arm into Hollander’s path. “That’s not—”

    “No, it’s fine. Stupid of me to expect anything else.” Hollander shook his head, gaze downcast, the barest hint of angry pink tinging his freckled cheeks. “Thanks for making it good, at least.”

    It. His first time.

    Ilya was the worst sort of asshole.

    ---

    In Sochi, Shane isn’t shy about calling out Ilya for ghosting after getting what he wanted. Once they’re safely away from Russia, Ilya forces himself to be honest with Shane about what that first time meant.

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  6. "What is your problem?" Shane demanded, his voice sounding thinner than he liked, laced with the exhaustion of the night. "I gave up our bedroom and the guest room and now you're here". He heard the rustle of fabric as Ilya settled onto the far end of the couch, claiming his territory with his infuriating, unspoken intensity. "We sleep in same place no matter what," Ilya murmured, the low, steady vibration of his voice hitting Shane somewhere deep. "So stay put or I follow you around home".

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  7. Shane: You know, believe it or not, eating women out actually wasn't my favorite pastime
    Ilya: Sure.
    Shane: Ilya. I’m GAY
    Ilya: Not too gay to eat lots of pussy

    In which the women Shane has slept with share their experiences on social media, Shane and Ilya both react totally normally, and Hayden would like some clarity on his best friend's sex life

    A sequel to "ten out of ten"

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  8. They came out. They got married. Shane was traded to the Centaurs, and now he's moving in. Wait...you mean the has to *live* with Ilya's household habits? Who even knew someone could load the dishwasher wrong??

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  9. Shane Hollander is benched following the fanmail video that outed his relationship with his rival Ilya Rozanov. While walking alone in Montreal he passes by a sports bar showing the Metros losing without him and he meets two unlikely companions.

     

    “Didn’t mean to interrupt,” says Shane in soft English, looking at the bartender only, “Uh, just saw the game was on when I walked by, wanted to know the score.” He swallows thickly, “Guess we’re losing?”

    The man who’d called him a homo ducks and with considerable effort, puts the table back where it had been before. He mutters something that Shane thinks is an apology to the bartender. The other man shakes his hand and reaches for a nearby chair. 

    In English, the man who’d called him the pride of Montréal says loudly, “A ginger ale for Monsieur Hollander, yes?”

    Shane hesitates, then nods at the bartender, who wordlessly starts to pour. The two men finish righting the place and gesture for Shane to sit with them. Shane shouldn’t. But he does as the bartender comes over and sets a glass of ginger ale in front of him. 

    “So,” says Shane as casually as he can, “Uh, I guess you’re both Metros fans?”

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  10. He went silent again, his brow furrowed so hard it looked painful. Suddenly, his eyes lit up. He stood up, his hockey gear clanking loudly. "I have it. I see on internet. A man. He has jar. He has bubbles." Shane blinked. "Bubbles? Like... a fish?" "No," Ilya said, pacing the room like a caged bear. "He make life from dust. He mix powder and water. He wait. He feed it like baby. Then... BREAD." "Oh so baking, you want to try baking bread?" Shane asked skeptically. "Not just bake, Shane. Sourdough. Is complex. Is science. Is war with yeast." Ilya's voice grew passionate, his Russian accent thickening. "It is sour, like my childhood. It is hard crust, like my heart."

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  11. Carter Vaughn (NY):

    You know all of a sudden Hollanders lack of texts seems really ominous

    You good there @Hollander

    You:

    No

    No I am not because one of the stupid fucking 19 year olds I’m somehow responsible for decided not to wear his bloody mouthguard at afternoon skate and the absolute dumbass took a stick to the face

    So now I’m sitting in the ER waiting for him to get back from xray because of course its the one rookie who isn’t with a billet family 

    Why are they like this?

    Lily:

    Their mothers didn't drop them on their heads enough as babys so the universe decided to do it for them

    -

    When Montreal and Boston name two 20 year olds as their captains, Scott Hunter decides that they could probably do with somewhere to turn to for advice.

    Four years later, he doesn't quite know if he regrets that or not.

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  12. Without a word, Ilya snaps his fingers and when Shane looks up he is holding Bood's phone in his hand. For a fleeting moment, Shane considers throwing the phone the full length of the bus just to get it away from his husband.

    He watches the way Ilya's eyes drag across the screen, reading whatever is in front of him. Ilya's jaw muscle twitches, his eyes narrow, and his nostrils flare. His whole face shifts from the beautiful man that he loves into some chiseled marble statue depicting the depth of man's rage.

    ———

    On the way back to Ottawa, the team (and twitter) find out just what was said during their game against Montreal.

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  13. @MHL Gossip @MHLGossip

    BREAKING: An audio posted by an anonymous source reveals that Boston Captain Ilya Rozanov is currently BLACKMAILING Montreal Captain Shane Hollander with what he calls an ‘incriminating photo’. Fans are left wondering just what the so called ‘Golden Boy’ of the MHL could have done and how does Rozanov have such a photo?

     

    @montrealbabes 

    FUCK

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  14. Louis Loon by

    Heated Rivalry (TV)
    • T
    • ✓

    2026-03-10

    Shane Hollander is a second grade teacher. The students at his school have started to hiss at each other. He just wants to get through his day with as little contact as possible with school librarian Mr. Rozanov.

    Featuring dorky Shane, menace Ilya, and some general teacher life shenanigans.

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  15. Ilya has a terrible idea for a Tiktok.

    So of course, he has to do it!

    AKA Ilya "Professional Ragebaiter" Rozanov has some fun fucking with his husband while the internet watches.

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  16. When Ilya finds out of his teammates has been using, his decision to turn him over to coach has the entire team penalized and they lose their momentum right before playoffs. To make matters worse, even after a press release clears the rest of the Raiders of any wrongdoings, the whole league still things Ilya is a cheater. Including Shane's team, who talks about it nonstop until one night he snaps and starts a fight with his own team on the ice.
    ---
    Ilya stepped towards him, hand grazing his elbow to try to get him to loosen up a bit. “You said, earlier, that it was me,” he mumbled. “You fought because of me."

    “Just a bit,” Shane joked weakly, looking back up at him. “They just- they hate you, Ilya. My parents, my team, my fans. And I hear it so much in the locker room or during practice, but on ice I- I couldn't fucking stand it anymore.” 

    “Is sweet,” he murmured, threading his hand through Shane’s hair and nudging him to lay his head on his shoulder. “But their words don’t hurt me.”

    Shane sighed, nuzzling against the fabric of his shirt for a moment. “Hurts me, though,” he said softly. “I don’t like hearing anyone accuse you of cheating.”

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  17. Someone left Hayden Pike in charge of the music for Shane Hollander's Tribute his first time back in Montreal.

    It goes about as well as you can expect

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  18. "I play,” Ilya said, his voice a deadpan rasp, “because if I do not play, my father make me work at potato factory. I hate potatoes. I want to buy car that goes fast enough to scare God." Or Clips and photos of Ilya's teenage years in Russia get leaked.

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