81 – 100 of 155 Works in Depression
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a moonbeam in your hand by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-02-19
"We have newest member of the team with us today, as you all have seen.”
Shane glanced up again, watching as the captain gestured vaguely toward Shane without looking at him. “Shane Hollander.” The name came out of his mouth like it was laced with poison.
Shane became very aware of many eyes turning to him now. He felt a few claps on the back and tried to force a tight smile. But his eyes wandered back up to Ilya Rozanov, who was looking at him with so much quiet contempt, that Shane started to understand the phrase ‘if looks could kill.’
/
OR: Ilya spirals into a deep depression when Shane breaks things off with him definitively after a horrifying run in with their feelings (and tuna melts).
They go no contact for close to a year until Shane is unexpectedly traded to Boston the following season.
Shane finds his new captain is a version of Ilya he's never seen before: dark, icy, and distant.
But their newfound proximity mixed with old feelings creates a complicated dynamic that they can't ignore forever.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 38,313
- Chapters:
- 18/18
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #78494131
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“You’re taking him to the Canteen?”
“Yeah- wait. You know it?” Shane turned to Rose with a surprised look on his face.
“He’ll like it!” Miles said, looking a bit shame-faced, like a child who hadn’t expected to be caught out.
“The Canteen, Miles.”
“He’ll have fun!” Miles insisted.
—-----------------------------
Going to a kink club with Miles may be one of the weirdest things Shane has ever done. But the evening gets even freakier when he bumps into Ilya Rozanov, his longtime rival and captain of the very team Shane was meant to be playing that night.
He's unfairly hot and incredibly irritating- but he gets under Shane's skin in a way no other dom can.
So hey, they might just find a way to make this work.
(Based on my own experiences as a domme in the London kink scene!)
Now with a playlist!- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 32,559
- Chapters:
- 6/?
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77170526
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The brush off Shane received when he suggested Ilya try medication was hardly surprising to him. What he found shocking was that he had actually done it. Without telling Shane, no less. And if that wasn't startling enough, finding out the entire hockey community knew because of one ill-timed picture Cliff Marlow took practically knocked him off balance.
---
“Who knew Rozanov would be the poster boy for Prozac?” Hayden muttered with a huff. “God, he’s gotta be floating on cloud nine with that dose. Normal people take like what, ten or twenty? Sixty must mean he was damn near suicidal.”“Probably,” JJ agreed, shrugging. “I wouldn’t know, I don’t need to medicate myself to cope with life.”
“If he’s all doped up, how come he’s still always such an asshole?” one of the rookies questioned, earning a few laughs.
Shane just felt sick to his stomach. And angry. At his team and Marlow and mostly at himself. Ilya had done exactly what he asked and now, he was getting mocked for taking care of himself. In what world was that fair?
“Maybe that’s why he’s so aggressive on the ice,” another theorized. “He's trying to kill himself and take another player with him to make it look like an accident.”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,183
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #79777351
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Shane, As Defined by Ilya. by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-02-10
Finally have time and inspiration to write a AU where Irina escapes her husband, and is able to take Ilya with her and raise him on her own with the support of the women of the neighbourhood like Yuna Hollander.
'There has never been a version of Shane that never loved Ilya.'
- Part 1 of There is no Shane without Ilya.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 31,215
- Chapters:
- 7/7
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #79225396
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There’s a sign in front of Shane. It says Welcome to Scott Hunter and Kip Grady’s Happily Ever After in a cursive font that makes Shane think of Etsy. Shane’s stomach churns. He briefly squeezes his empty ring finger. He feels, all at once, like he might cry. Instead, he swallows, and breathes, and pastes a smile on his face, and marches his ass down to Scott and Kip’s fucking wedding of the century.
- Part 1 of two weddings and a scandal
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 31,700
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #79108616
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a collection of unrelated short fics, 1k words or less!
1. Harris picks Troy's outfit for the Ottawa pride parade (rated E)
2. Ilya wakes up crying and Shane comforts him (rated E)
3. Harris gets competitive at bar trivia (rated T)
4. Luca Haas sees *the* FanMail video and has a minor breakdown, but gets unexpected emotional support (rated G)
5. Rose Landry visits the cottage, they get drunk and tease Shane (rated E, but no on-page sex, just references to it)
6. Ficlet prompt: Shane/Ilya + skinny dipping (rated M)
7. Ficlet prompt: Troy/Harris + picnic (rated G)
8. Ficlet prompt: Shane/Ilya + argument with a family member ft. Hollanov kids (rated G)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,255
- Chapters:
- 8/?
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #67779426
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"Sveta," he says, before she can greet him. "I think I'm about to do something very stupid."
"You're always doing something stupid," she laughs, her voice tinny over the speakerphone. "What is it this time?"
"I am in a staring contest with a bottle of pills," Ilya says. "And I think the pills might win."
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Or: An alternate take on Ilya's mental health after moving to Ottawa, featuring the reality of long distance relationships, Ilya learning to captain a new team, and a series of game tapes made by Ilya's dead father.
- Part 11 of my anonymous heated rivalry fic
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 14,171
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #78975931
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How a Russian Takes his Porridge by lavagirlultra
Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
2026-02-05
Ilya's supposed to tell Shane when he's getting bad again. He's promised, over and over, to ask for help. To reach out. To let Shane take care of him for once. Ilya genuinely means it when he makes this promise. He has no intention of breaking it. The issue is this: Ilya doesn't always realize things are getting bad. Actually, he almost never notices until someone else does. or: In the midst of a depressive episode, Ilya wonders if Shane truly understands what he's signing up for.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,248
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #78926836
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mostly is plenty by amongtheshadows
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-02-05
“I feel stupid,” Ilya admits, the words slipping out thin and brittle. “I should be able to do this.” Shane pauses for a fraction of a second, then resumes, gentler still. “I know you think that,” he says. “But right now, your job is to be here and let me help. That’s it. You’re doing great.” *ilya is stuck in a depressive episode and shane helps him through it*
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,488
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #78931026
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The Second First Time by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-26
Shane Hollander wakes up in a hospital room convinced it’s 2016 — and that Ilya Rozanov is still his biggest rival, someone he’s supposed to hate.
But the world has changed. It’s 2025. They play for the same team, live in the same house, and Ilya Rozanov is wearing a wedding ring.
Now Shane has to relive nine lost years, learn to trust his ‘enemy,’ and find out whether he can fall in love with his own husband all over again.- Part 1 of Again, and Always
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 59,706
- Chapters:
- 24/24
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #75655531
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Ilya watches as, with shaking fingers, Shane presses something on his phone and turns it to him.
There is an article open. Ilya sees… a photo of him at Shane’s house in Montreal. A side by side comparison of them, wearing—sharing—the same shirts, and hoodies. Shane’s car driving through the gates at Ilya’s new house.
Shane hiccups, tears streaming down his cheeks.
“They figured us out.”
A year in the life of Shane and Ilya, if they had been outed earlier.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 59,887
- Chapters:
- 14/14
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77507566
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please let me die on the street where you live by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-24
Shane takes a hit on the ice. Is barely bruised, isn’t concussed, and is cleared to play in his next game.
Ilya spirals.
It starts to feel like the world is ending.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 18,286
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77466036
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Shane Hollander loved Ilya Rozanov, so much that it was going to kill him. He has to make the most of the time he has left after the Olympics, before the roots really take hold. AKA your basic Hanahaki Disease fic, full of pining, mild body horror, sex, and eventually some well-earned comfort.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 26,519
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #77220691
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Newly traded to the Ottawa Centaurs, Ilya Rozanov is so close to having everything he’d never thought he was allowed to want. He can see the man he loves more than four times a year, he’s surrounded by a team who supports him through his injury, and Shane’s parents have unhesitatingly accepted him as part of the family.
Except his lingering concussion symptoms have kept him sidelined from hockey, his boyfriend is still two hours away, their schedules are a disaster, and Shane’s team is, well…it’s full of assholes. There must be a way to make this all work out.
or
A sequel to a whump fanfiction with more whump…that is also, secretly, a fix-it.
- Part 2 of Return-to-Play
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 50,452
- Chapters:
- 20/20
- Files:
- 7 versions
- AO3:
- #77100471
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Philosophe, physicien by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-21
Ilya doesn’t think much of his own impulses. He goes to a bar, he finds a pretty girl, he has sex. He catches Sasha’s eye from across the locker room, and then they’re in the same toilet stall, noises bitten away before they become dangerous. Svetlana invites him over when her father is away, and he kisses her on top of her quilted bedspread, hard from the feel of her under his hands and, a little bit, from the anticipation of the beating he’ll get if the Minister walks in on him. She scratches her fingers through his hair afterwards and he traces letters into the skin above her knee.
So when he gets the impulse to buy Hollander flowers, he doesn’t hesitate. Maybe it’s because Hollander is so cute with his little freckles. Maybe because he gets irritated so easily, that flush spilling down his collarbones to his chest. Maybe Ilya just wants to reward him for opening the door after that CCM shoot, or for letting Ilya suck his dick after the All-Stars even with Scott Hunter next door.
OR: 5 times Ilya got Shane flowers, and 1 time Shane got Ilya flowers
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,642
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #78034491
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Ilya didn’t feel like himself sometimes, but Shane would always be Shane — the brighter and braver part of him. ; Ilya is going through a depressive episode. Shane tries to help.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,024
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77905386
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i know my darkness will never go away by probsnothawkeye
Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
2026-01-16
It's hard when you're living / and you don't feel much / and you're down and you're hoping / that things are gonna change Apathy wasn’t quite the word for it; it was something much deeper than apathy was. It was like a numbness, like a void had taken root in Ilya’s heart and swallowed him whole. He wasn’t even moving on autopilot– no, he was incredibly aware of his every movement, every decision, every thought. It was inertia, pure and simple, that kept Ilya moving. There was no outside force to stop his motion, not when his brain was this empty, so he simply kept gliding along, wondering when the feeling would come back. If the feeling would come back.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,554
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77757766
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what do you say to a brand-new ghost? by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-16
Ilya did not want to die. It’s a natural thought as the plane seems to fall around him. He’s twenty-nine, he does not want to die. It’s the intensity that surprises him, the desperate need clawing at his heart, pressing against his ribs, surging in his throat. He’s choking on it, aching with it, burning with it.
The plane is falling around him, and he wants to live so badly it’s all he can see.
-
Or, The Plane Crash nearly goes as wrong as possible when Shane's game is cancelled, and he sees Ilya's messages in real time. To make matters worse, Ilya spends fifteen minutes falling out of the sky and mourning all that he would never have. Or, Ilya's pov of i pray this love changes me (this grief will) ft. the very confused but supportive Centaurs
- Part 3 of found family *hockey edition
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,759
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77746396
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Title inspired by pool (stripped) - by Samia Ilya's life was perfect. The Centaurs were thriving with both Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov. He'd always loved playing against Shane, but playing with him, with his ring on his finger, was a whole other level. He couldn't have been happier. He doesn't remember why it happened. Or why it had to happen to him. Or Ilya gets in a car crash and everything changes.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,411
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77539541
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Five Things You Can See by lillyluna
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-15
“I am sad.” Ilya says shortly. “Very sad.” “Where do you feel it in your body?” Shane tries to help. “Feel what? The sadness?” Ilya looks at him like he’s gone insane. “Yes, the emotion.” Shane starts to feel unsure, “In your body where do you feel it?” Shane thinks of all the times he’s worried about Ilya; how that worry lives in his throat and in the tension of his shoulders.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,893
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77702671