41 – 60 of 154 Works in Depression
- Depression ×
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Fuck-Marry-Kill by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
2026-06-01
Ryan Price gets traded to Toronto and he hates it. Hates it.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 8,376
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #85965901
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lonely i came, and i depart alone by Anonymous
Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types, Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-05-31
Ilya has heard people say that suicide is a selfish act. He's heard people say it about his mother, and it used to make him furious. He’d punched Alexei for it, once, broken his nose when he said, why are you still moping over that selfish bitch, she left us without a thought, even though he knew it was his brother’s grief speaking and not his heart.
That word, selfish, made him so furious, maybe, because some small part of him believed it. Some part of himself, a part of him that he was too ashamed of to acknowledge, let alone to name, believed that his mother should have been braver. Should have been stronger. Should have fought harder to stay with him, to keep taking care of him. Would have, if she’d loved Ilya as much as she claimed to.
He knows now, now that he has Shane, that it isn’t true. He knows it is possible to love someone entirely, completely, with the purest and truest love, and for life to still be unbearable.
***
Another look at Ilya's depression in The Long Game.
- Part 1 of a strange door
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,280
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #85832251
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Shane leaves professional hockey before locker room homophobia and contractual obligations can destroy him.
Somehow, inexplicably, he winds up on the Savannah Bananas, an exhibition baseball team.
He coaches skating for kids in the off season.
For the first time in years, Shane has fun again.
(He doesn't think about Ilya Rozanov or those two nights they shared together)
(He doesn't give Rozanov his number when, years later, they reunite)
(Except actually he does)
(It's the best thing he's ever done)- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 56,835
- Chapters:
- 25/25
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #83299681
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we only know the love we’re shown by justhockey
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-05-25
Ilya has always known Shane could do better than him. It shouldn’t come as a surprise that he’s finally found it. Found someone else. Because that’s what this is, isn’t it?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,913
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #85527351
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cause it's on again, off again (love you like oxygen) by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-05-25
“Y-Yeah, totally,” Shane replied. “D-Do you uh– do you know who that kid with Rozanov is?”
Scott laughed a little, tilting his head in confusion.
“Probably Rozanov’s kid,” he informed Shane, causing his brain to stall completely.
“You didn’t hear?” Scott asked, and Shane blinked, trying to reboot his mind from the crash that Scott had just caused. “It’s why he took time off,” Hunter informed him. “Found out he had a kid, I guess. Or something like that, I didn’t really get the details.”
Of all the reasons he’d thought of for Ilya disappearing for the past month, this had never crossed his mind. A million different thoughts raced through Shane’s mind. How the hell was Ilya a dad, and why hadn’t he told Shane and how the fuck did Scott Hunter of all people find out before him and—
And what the fuck was Shane supposed to do now?
_______________________________________________________________
After the tuna melt situation, Ilya suddenly disappears from hockey for six weeks, claiming some sort of family emergency. Shane showed up to the All-Star game ready to try and fix things, only to be shocked to find a little girl at Ilya's side with remarkably familiar blue eyes.
- Part 1 of heated rivalry fics
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 118,425
- Chapters:
- 24/?
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76668636
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Shane Hollander suffers a career ending injury in Metros training camp derailing his pro hockey dreams before they even start. He is forced to come to terms with who he is without his sport and find a new direction. Ilya Rozanov with nobody around to push him has lost his love for the game. More than a decade later, the new team doctor brings up old feelings that never had the space to grow all those years ago, but are now growing out of control.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 164,612
- Chapters:
- 25/25
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #78323926
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Shane As It Ever Was by Anonymous
Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types, Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
2026-05-22
Ilya wakes with no memory after an eventful night. Or maybe it wasn’t eventful. He doesn’t remember, that’s the problem.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,110
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #85342996
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Something Borrowed / Something Blew by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
2026-05-17
Shane is in the front pew. His face is—Ilya does not have words for what Shane's face is doing. He has seen Shane angry and afraid and exhausted and soft and undone. He has never seen this. This is something below all of those things, something that lives at the very bottom of a person, that surfaces only when the thing above it has given way.
This is what it looks like when Shane has nothing left to manage.
Ilya reaches for him.
His hand passes through air.
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Or: Ilya Rozanov turns the same age his mother was when she died. Featuring strange dreams, tarot readings, and a woman with her back to him who keeps appearing where she shouldn’t.
A man who spent twenty years preparing to die, and one husband who refuses to let him.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 38,462
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #85022466
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Modern Lockets by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types, Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-05-12
“Sweetheart, your pretty little head is so silly. For every photocard I make of ugly hockey men, I make two of my gorgeous, radiant, pulchritudinous boyfriend. Sometimes three.”
A smile breaks through the heated haze of Shane’s expression. “You’ve been using the thesaurus Dad got you for Christmas?”
“I will beat Yuna Hollander at Scrabble one day,” Ilya declares against Shane’s hip bone.
In the year between the Cottage and the Centaurs, Ilya misses Shane more than ever. Svetlana’s teenage cousin offers a coping method: Kpop-style Shane Hollander photocards to stare at all day long. It's a shame carrying around pictures of fellow hockey players is just not socially acceptable.
…At least, not yet.
(AKA: Ilya's mission to desensitize the hockey world to his Hollander fanboyisms, and the NHL players that suffer for it.)- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 35,708
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #84249706
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Ours To Tell by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
2026-05-12
Pride Night was supposed to be the easy part.
Then Dallas Kent showed up, Troy Barrett threw the first punch, Ilya Rozanov stopped the fight, and Ottawa won a game nobody felt much like celebrating.
By morning, Dallas was in custody, Ilya was in hospital, and the internet had decided everyone knew exactly what had happened.
A week later, injured, furious, and barely holding himself together, Ilya tries to get back to hockey.
Instead, he gets a camera.
One soft question.
One honest answer.
“My boyfriend.”
It is the truth.
It is also the one thing he and Shane were supposed to choose together.
Based on a Reddit fic prompt by u/backtothefuture2028.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 38,786
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #84026841
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Personne Sait Comment On Fait Des Papas by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-05-11
“Alexei, I fucking told you to never call me again, you fucking piece of—”
“Am I speaking with Ilya Grigorievich Rozanov?”
Ilya went silent immediately. That was not his brother’s voice. Nor was it Katia’s, his sister-in-law. It was an aristocratic, cold voice. He went completely still.
“Yes.”
“I’m calling from the Child Services Department, Ilya Grigorievich,” the woman continued, and Ilya frowned deeply. “Your brother Alexei Rozanov and his wife died yesterday in a car accident.”
Twice in his life, Ilya had felt like this. The ice around his heart melted just enough for the numbness to vanish and give way to a sharp, stinging pain. It lasted only two seconds before he managed to compose himself. He didn’t want to feel anything for Alexei, so even if Katia’s death carried a trace of sadness—she was a mess, but she always tried to smile at him and cook warm meals for him when he visited Russia—, he dismissed the feeling entirely.
“So what?”
“You are the only living family member of their daughter. Your brother named you as her legal guardian, Ilya Grigorievich.”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 116,221
- Chapters:
- 9/12
- Files:
- 3 versions
- AO3:
- #76439116
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forgive me if i jump at the rattle of your keys by justhockey
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-05-11
Ilya knew, right from the very moment he met Shane Hollander, that he would never be good enough for him. He’d seemed so…pristine, when they first met. Untouched. And Ilya knew his unclean hands would only dirty him up. He’s always been selfish, though; his father used to tell him that. So it’s no surprise, really, that Shane has finally gotten tired of it. Of him, always needing more from Shane than he deserves - always begging for more than he has earned. Ilya would leave himself, too, if he could. (Or, five time Ilya thought Shane would leave, and one time he knew he wasn’t going anywhere.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 8,381
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #84685756
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The Many Reactions of Shane Hollander by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-05-10
(to The Many Plans of J.J. Boiziau)
So J.J. had figured out that Shane’s secret boyfriend was Ilya after less than twelve hours of even knowing that he had a secret boyfriend. And it had been… fine? His reaction hadn’t been at all what Shane had expected. He still couldn’t quite wrap his head around it.
But one problem at a time. He was sure that he was a bad boyfriend to Ilya, no matter what J.J. had said, and he needed to find a way to fix it.
Or, some moments from Shane’s POV that J.J. wasn’t present for.
- Part 3 of The Queer Hockey Agenda
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 8,828
- Chapters:
- 3/8
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #84429951
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The Centaurs had already been through one plane emergency. What are the chances of them being in another?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 25,785
- Chapters:
- 5/5
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #80123401
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Once More Around the Sun by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-04-23
After Shane walks out post-tuna melt, Ilya Rozanov walks through hell to remind himself who he is, a man ready to salt the fucking Earth for his people.
Shane’s not even pretending he’s capable of being rational about it, he isn’t, his world is falling apart at the seams and he’s fairly sure he’s losing his mind.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 33,533
- Chapters:
- 9/?
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #80301421
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Not a New Man (Or Crispy Realization) by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-04-19
Ilya Rozanov told the hockey gods his plans: sign in Ottawa, start a charity named after his mother, date Shane Hollander, play hockey until the shelves in the trophy room collapse, retire, come out (?), kiss his someday husband in every boring restaurant and boring grocery store and public place imaginable.
After being carted off the ice with a career-threatening injury, Ilya has the distinct feeling he is being laughed at.
- Part 1 of Good Winter
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 35,070
- Chapters:
- 9/?
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76752126
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continuity errors/tuesday again by Anonymous
Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types, Heated Rivalry (TV)
2026-04-17
The first thing you should know about time loops is that they’re really fucking hard to break. The second thing is that you can never break one in such a way that it is incapable of returning.
The third thing you should know is that everyone around you has probably been stuck in a time loop at one point or another, and they made it out alive. This is only comforting if you’re a numbers guy, or if you’re the kind of guy who talks to others about how it feels to live the same day over and over and over and over and over and over again.
Shame if you’re not; the most important thing you should know about breaking a time loop is that it helps to tell someone you’re trapped in one in the first place.
- Part 12 of my heated rivalry fics
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 32,873
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #82936316
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In This And Every Life (I'd Choose Us Every time) by Anonymous
Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
2026-04-15
Shane decides to give Ilya space. He’ll call when he’s ready. So Shane accepts an offer from one of his endorsements to fly to Washington ahead of his team for a promotional shoot and tries to be patient. When his plane goes down in the mountains, Ilya struggles to find hope and isn’t sure how he’ll live in a world without Shane in it.
- Part 1 of After All These Years
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 108,632
- Chapters:
- 20/20
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #78337946
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A Danger to Yourself or Others by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-04-15
Galina stopped writing to look at Ilya. "Do you think he'd be willing to talk to you next time it happens, even if it's late?"
Ilya's stomach turned over. He didn't even want to consider it, but he knew the answer. "Yes. But he silences his phone at night."
"Most phones these days have an option to let certain numbers ring through, even on Do Not Disturb. Do you think he'd be open to setting that up for you?"
Imagining that conversation made Ilya nauseous. Yes, no fucking doubt, Shane would be open to it if Ilya explained the reason. "I'm not going to ask him to do that."
Set during The Long Game, an alternate version where the plane scene doesn't happen. Instead, there's this: a car crash, a therapist's duty to report, and an urgent reckoning with priorities.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 37,182
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #81233801
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Cinnamon Burn by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
2026-04-14
Shane and Ilya work at Crowell and Associates Marketing Firm. They have never worked together because their work styles are completely incompatible. A project forces them to spend more time together and explore whether or not they can actually get along.
OR
Ilya is a little shit just because he wants Shane's attention, what happens when he finally gets it?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 32,110
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #81718116