161 – 180 of 1,917 Works in Teen And Up Audiences

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  1. "Chlamydia?" Ilya has never heard Hollander's voice reach such heights in the absence of a cock. "You have chlamydia?"

    "I did not get it on purpose," Ilya complains.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,776
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #88443821
  2. “I know you said you couldn’t do this week,” a woman was yelling from outside, “but I have to take an extra shift, and Magda is away. Ilya! Are you th-” She paused upon finally stepping inside, a colourful backpack hanging over her shoulder and a bag in her hand. “Oh.” Shane could hear Rozanov scrambling behind him, probably wiping his stomach off and pulling his clothes out of their rumpled sex state, before he stepped into view of the door. The small child who had been staring at Shane with her gigantic blue eyes turned at the movement, and her face split into a wide grin. “Papa!” Picking up right after the tuna melt scene Shane is confronted with Ilya Rozanov's secret child, a move that everyone except for the child is embarrassed and awkward about.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    59,628
    Chapters:
    20/20
    Files:
    2 versions
    AO3:
    #85380606
  3. Marly: hes head was not in the game that night for sure

    CC: maybe he played like trash and she dumped him?
    CC: shes got to be a hockey fan
    CC: cant imagine cap dating someone who doesnt like hockey

    Marly: nah he was in a mood that day before the game

    St. Vicky: so what you think she dumped him just before the game?
    St. Vicky: bro thats brutal

    Hammer: maybe shes a voyageur sleeper agent


    The Boston Bears band together to find Montreal Jane and win her back for their beloved Captain. They are dumb but their love is pure.

    Loosely inspired by Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Dead with the same amount of crack but without any of the literary merit. Set post-Tuna Meltdown.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,689
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #87551491
  4. cat got your tongue by

    Heated Rivalry (TV)
    • T
    • ✓

    2026-07-19

    Shane has no idea what the hell he's doing, but the longer this goes on the more real it all feels and he can't keep pretending this is a dream.
    But it has to be.
    It's simply not possible for him to be a fucking cat in Ilya Rozanov's kitchen.

    aka
    shane gets turned into a cat and ilya has no idea... until he does

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    16,155
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Files:
    2 versions
    AO3:
    #88848696
  5. sweet little lies by

    Heated Rivalry (TV)
    • T
    • ✓

    2026-07-18

    Ilya used to think Shane was a bad liar.

    He would, after all, notice every time Shane stammered through a falsehood or half-truth. Sometimes he even let him.

    Now, Ilya wonders if maybe they weren't built to understand one another. Cosmically destined for one another in a way that others aren't. Mama used to talk about people like that, people made by fate for one another, misunderstandings are natural even with the ones you love; but there are some people that you just get.

    Shane is a bad liar. A bad liar to Ilya who he refuses to look at and when he does the shame of the lie is written in every freckle on his beautiful face.

    To others not so much.

    --
    Or the 3 times Shane helped sell a lie from Ilya and the 1 time he refused to lie with Hayden

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,229
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #88805781
  6. The first time Shane meets the WAGS in person.

    Cassie
    Shaaaaaaane

    Selena
    Someone call Ilya – get this man out of the kitchen

    Shane
    He's walking Anya right now so 😋
    See you all tonight 👋

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,196
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #88784401
  7. Shane: You all seriously want to do this?

    Shane: Like you know this is going to be on the internet forever, right?

     

    Ilya: Sorry everyone.

    Ilya: He still has this weird sense of self-preservation.

    Ilya: We're working on it.

     

    Bood: Come on, Hollander.

    Bood: It'll be fun!

    Bood: We'll all look like idiots together.

     

    Shane: That's not as comforting as you think it is.

     

    Evan: Is there a limit on the number of rainbows and dicks that can be on the shirt?

    Evan: Asking for the person I'm buying for who maybe definitely is named Shane Hollander.

     

    Shane: I hate all of you.

     

    Ilya: See you at the airport!! ✈️👕🏒

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,096
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #88723891
  8. Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov are teammates, charity co-founders and ex-rivals. They are definitely not dating, and are obviously both super heterosexual.
    It's a new season and Lily (Shane's very real girlfriend, who is definitely not his Captain Ilya Rozanov) has decided to join the group chat for the spouses and partners of Ottawa Centaurs, which Jane (Ilya Rozanov's very real girlfriend, who is definitely not his alternate Captain Shane Hollander) is already a member of.

    What could go wrong?

    ( The sequel to "I just need a quiet place where I can scream how I love you")

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    41,416
    Chapters:
    18/18
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #85847336
  9. “Listen, Ilya is-“ Shane doesn’t hear anything else. The crowd around them dissolves into white noise. He wants to smack Ilya’s name out of Sasha’s mouth. “Mine,” Shane snaps, finishing Sasha’s sentence for him. “Ilya is mine.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,183
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    2 versions
    AO3:
    #88737736
  10. serpentine by

    Heated Rivalry (TV)
    • T
    • ✓

    2026-07-17

    “Ah.”

    “‘Ah’,” Ilya repeats, giving him a look before he looks back to the tidily stacked frozen mouse packages in the freezer and makes a face as a little badly-hidden shudder moves through him. “Why the fuck do you have mice in your freezer, Shane? You are doing serial killer shit now? This is why you have cottage in the middle of nowhere? For serial killer things?”

    “It’s for Spaghetti,” Shane says.

    Ilya gives him an absolutely horrified look at that and turns a little green, which makes him remember that Spaghetti isn’t just his snake's name.

    “Not food!” He rushes to explain. “Not food spaghetti! Snake Spaghetti!”

    “What the fuck are you even saying right now,” Ilya says, looking honestly a little concerned that Shane might have something going wrong in his head.

    (Distancing himself from almost twenty years of owning a snake, Shane can indeed see why this situation might be a little alarming for someone on the outside looking in.)

    (It also clues him in to the fact that maybe it’s not just Spaghetti who should have gotten a little adjustment period.)

    (in which i give shane allergies AND a snake)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,192
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #88695836
  11. The closest Shane came to telling the truth these days was when he was lying.

    Or: Shane panics and tells his mom he's seeing someone.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    28,735
    Chapters:
    9/?
    Files:
    2 versions
    AO3:
    #77707976
  12. Following their coming out, Shane and Ilya spend a whole summer doing interviews, talking about their relationship and about how it will affect hockey.
    The interview season ends with them playing Truth or Drink for a magazine. During the game Shane gets a bit too drunk from all the questions he avoids answering, and he ends up revealing a bit too much about their dynamic, which isn't a big deal usually but Ilya is drunk as well and won't let it go.

    The headlines read: Shane Hollander is a Bottom, but he's not really bothered by them.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,454
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #88438251
  13. Fork in the Road by

    Heated Rivalry (TV)
    • T

    2026-07-16

    After a revealing chat with Scott and Kip, Shane faces the fact that his team treats him like shit. Set during the 2017-2018 season, the one right after Hollanov's first trip to the cottage, Shane then has to decide what to do next with his career.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    16,007
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #85893836
  14. Shane swiftly darts his eyes to the front and shifts it back to the boy. “Sorry! What were you going to say?” “No, no. Is nothing, you go first,” he insists. “Oh. Um, okay, I was wondering about your name?” “Ilya Rozanov.” Ilya. Pretty. Woah. Okay. Or 12 year old Shane Hollander's whole world was focused on one thing. Unbeknownst to him, llya Rozanov has been eyeing Shane in longing for the past week (and his freckles, of course).

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,144
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #88052021
  15. When Shane is born, Yuna buries her face into the soft tuft of black hair he was born with and tries her hardest not to cry.

    I love you, she thinks, and worries, and knows. And it will not be enough.

    OR: Yuna and magic don't exactly get along. Good thing she's not magical.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,800
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #88315001
  16. Hayden has solved the Boston Lily mystery - Lily and Shane are in love, and she’s pregnant! Now Hayden just needs to be patient until Shane tells him the happy news.

    But that might be harder than expected…

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,427
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #88460396
  17. Dylan starts playing around with video editing software after taking (and dropping) a community college media class in 2011. He may as well use the new skills to make something, so he makes a hockey video. This leads to him becoming the ‘Ilya Rozanov Fight Compilation’ guy – it’s the start of an interesting two decades.

    Or, the twenty years of Ilya Rozanov's MLH career as seen through the posts of one social media account.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    68,413
    Chapters:
    21/21
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #86257861
  18. A countdown to the moment that makes the season.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,343
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #88381566
  19. Several MLH players have their phones hacked.

    Most people find embarrassing photos.

    Ilya Rozanov accidentally leaks five years' worth of sex reviews.

    -

    You know that TikTok trend where people rate how good the sex was in front of their partner?

    Yeah. It's that.

     

    UPDATED: (second chapter) July 12, 2026

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,068
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Files:
    2 versions
    AO3:
    #87983266
  20. [Seven members of the Ottawa Centaurs stand in the backyard of Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov. Each of the men holds a bag of candy as they joke with each other while Harris Drover sets up the shot. The sun is beginning to dip in the sky behind them, and the Stanley Cup sits on a makeshift stand made out of a cushioned lawn chair. Shane hovers close to the cup, and can be seen eyeing it with concern as Ilya watches him with amusement.]

    Shane: That doesn’t look very stable. We could have at least dragged the patio table out here.

    Ilya: It’s fine, sweetheart.

    Shane: I know, but it’s my day with the cup, I don’t want anything to happen to it.

    Ilya: Bood seasoned jerk chicken in there, yesterday. I think it will survive a little trauma candy salad dump in our backyard.

    Shane: That feels like a famous last words kind of scenario.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,714
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #88421441
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