321 – 340 of 605 Works in Angst
- Angst ×
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Stick to your guns, Ilya thinks. Sex. With Hollander. That’s simple. Straightforward.
Except nothing about this night has been straightforward. The more time he spends with Hollander, the more he wants him - and not just the sex. He wants it all: the reading glasses, earnest ramblings, moral compulsions. The sweetness Hollander tries to hide. The way he holds back from almost everyone, even from himself, but never from Ilya.
***
or: After Vegas, Ilya knows he should end it with Hollander. He likes trouble, yes. Doesn’t mean he likes feeling scraped raw by wanting impossible things. Then they are marooned together for a very long, very strange night during which Ilya begins to suspect – shakily, reluctantly – that they might be… something.NOW COMPLETE!
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 36,678
- Chapters:
- 7/7
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #76740611
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“He’ll never forget anything about their first night. Or any night he shared with Ilya. Every detail has been etched into him. Without them, he wouldn’t recognize himself. Without them he was blank. Stop thinking about Rozanov. Fuck. He seeks new memories. New… etches. So when future archeologists dig up his bones they won’t read them like a love letter to Ilya Rozanov. Shane knows it’s risky. But he doesn’t know that tonight he won’t be etched, he’ll be broken.” When Shane hooks up with a stranger after a game, he thinks the worst that could happen is getting outed. He is wrong. What was meant to be a night to forget all about Ilya Rozanov, becomes a night when he needs him most.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 75,054
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77450206
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to the tempo of your uptight (he flickers through your damage) by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-29
It didn’t really click for Shane until his boyfriend nearly broke down their steel-inforced bathroom door to get to him; Something Is Wrong With Ilya.
or: Ilya goes off the deep end. Shane doesn’t realize he’s already down there with him.
- Part 2 of Merry Christmas, Please Don't Call
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 13,429
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #78552791
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"He allowed himself one last moment of anger, and slammed his already broken stick into the edge of his cubby.
And with that, Shane Hollander walked away from his hockey career."
Halfway through his rookie season, Shane Hollander suffered a concussion that took him out of hockey. Three years later, he returns to hockey as an assistant coach. In Boston.
- Part 1 of "second chances" universe
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 15,698
- Chapters:
- 9/9
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77981586
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Anchor by Anonymous
Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
2026-01-29
The first call comes early, when Ilya is still skating along the edge of a dream. Shane is tucked in warm at his side, and his hair scratches at the underside of Ilya’s jaw, and the tender patch that always tickles just beneath his ear. He can hear the vibration against the wooden bedside table, the soft buzz buzz buzz incessant as a mosquito but he ignores it to go back in the warmth of his sleepy haze.
Later, when the sun is fully up and Shane pulls from his warm and sweaty side, he checks his phone. It’s an unknown number, the region code is for Russia.
OR
Ilya's niece reaches out to him eight years after he's last seen her. It makes him think about the things he never let himself miss.
- Part 2 of Shane and Ilya, Anchored
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 8,726
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #78468081
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call it what you want by Anonymous
Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
2026-01-28
When Canadian transfer student Shane Hollander joins Boston University’s Division 1 hockey team, he expects intense practices, elite competition, and the pressure to be drafted. What he doesn't expect is to be roped up into tutoring the infuriatingly talented, infamous frat boy Ilya Rozanov. Between late-night study sessions, high-stakes games, and reckless frat parties—how will either of them survive the season?
or
Frat Boy Ilya Rozanov x Nerdy Shane Hollander
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 64,738
- Chapters:
- 12/?
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76634936
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In a world where editing mistakes never occurred and Scott met Kip in 2016, Scott is fully aware that he's not the only gay man in the MLH, and he's been following Hollander and Rozanov's relationship with no small amount of happiness for them. So when he faces a miserable Rozanov and figures Hollander has left him for an actress, he has some thoughts about it.
Or, in which Scott Hunter is Not Mad, Just Disappointed, and is 100% not projecting, but also these kids need to be stopped before they ruin something beautiful.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,552
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #78460631
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“Oh shit.”
Shane looked up, turned his head to where J.J. was sat across the aisle. The blue glow of his phone lit up the too-wide whites of his eyes staring down intently at whatever was on his screen. Shane’s stomach lurched again, anticipating a sudden stop his body hadn’t quite caught up to yet.
“The Centaurs’ plane crashed in Tampa.”
There was a moment where everything was still moving, where Shane and the world were still spinning at the same speed they both always had, and then it all came crashing down. Shane wasn’t sure whether it was him that had stopped, or the world around him, but either way, in a matter of seconds the distance between himself and the bus he had only a moment ago been sitting in became staggeringly, dizzyingly vast.
The Centaur's emergency landing plays out a little bit worse, and Shane is left with the harsh reality of the cost of loving Ilya in secret.
- Part 1 of Crashing 'Verse
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 24,449
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #78109881
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and when it rains on this side of town, it touches everything by canadianwolfbird
Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
2026-01-27
Suddenly, there’s the sensation of a hand in his and Ilya smiles, turning to see his mother, Irina. She’s just as beautiful as he remembers. “Hi, mom.” A sad smile crosses Irina’s face in return - a smile Ilya was all too familiar with as a child. It’s the smile she used when she was trying to cover her pain. Ilya is confused - he thought his mother might be happy to see him, the way he is happy to see her. “What’s wrong?” Irina shakes her head a little, staying silent. “Tell me, please,” Ilya says, a little desperate. “You need to go home, Ilyushka.” His mother shakes her head again, squeezing his hand. “This is not your home.”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,867
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #78179671
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It’s funny, if he doesn’t think about what it entails, that only three months after seeing Ilya play with those kids in the pool, Shane finds out he’s pregnant with Ilya’s baby.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 20,481
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77105411
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Alexei Rozanov dies at 37. Ilya goes home for the funeral.
- Part 1 of Concertina
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,532
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #78395776
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Worst Proposal Ever by RayByAnotherName
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-27
A locked folder from Shane's phone ends up on the internet for everyone to see, including his teammates. It certainly undercuts their victory against the Bears, but it'll all turn out right. Eventually.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 15,060
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Files:
- 3 versions
- AO3:
- #77735596
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“Don’t- yeah. It’s fine. It’s all fine,” Shane snaps, anger written all over his face before it fades to something that Ilya doesn’t recognize. It looks familiar, somehow reminds him of Shane when they had first started hooking up, but he can’t place it. Ilya makes a confused noise at the aggression, and Shane breathes out slowly, some of the tension leaving his body. “Sorry. Some dumb drunk dudes in the stands were bothering me as I was walking out, but I’m okay,” he says. Ilya reaches forward to rub his shoulder, to comfort him, but Shane’s eyes widen and he leans back just the tiniest bit, so Ilya retracts his hand. OR Ilya knows something is wrong, that Shane is hurting, but Shane won't talk to him; in fact, he barely even lets Ilya get near him anymore.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,267
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #78340966
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Ilya Rozanov. One of the star players of the NHL, nearly a decade into his career. Center for the Boston Bears, a brutal, fast player known for womanizers tendencies and his bragging habits.
Kip had learned a lot about hockey in the last three years, unable to swipe past anything to do with Scott’s career. Ilya Rozanov was a difficult player to mistake and it was his distinctive build that stood beside him now, glaring down at the buildings as if they’d personally offended him.
“...Hi.” Kip had to give himself credit. Even with the hesitation, the greeting was clear and strong, pushed past the tightness of his shirt on his shoulders, his collar resting against his throat.
“Hello,” said Rozanov, shifting to cross his arms and lean them against the railing. His suit was near to the navy blue Kip was wearing– a popular color, and he was doubly glad Scott had insisted on it. “Is nice out here. Cold.”
Three times that Ilya supported Scott's relationship and one time he defended his own.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,522
- Chapters:
- 3/4
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77538331
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Ilya watches as, with shaking fingers, Shane presses something on his phone and turns it to him.
There is an article open. Ilya sees… a photo of him at Shane’s house in Montreal. A side by side comparison of them, wearing—sharing—the same shirts, and hoodies. Shane’s car driving through the gates at Ilya’s new house.
Shane hiccups, tears streaming down his cheeks.
“They figured us out.”
A year in the life of Shane and Ilya, if they had been outed earlier.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 59,887
- Chapters:
- 14/14
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77507566
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“You’ve got to show Hollander,” someone laughs incredulously. Before he can really process what is happening, J.J. is shoving a phone in his face, the screen so close the picture that he is trying to show him is nothing but a blurb of a man and woman. “Look at this shit, can you believe it?” J.J. asks excitedly. “I don’t know what I’m looking at,” Shane cringes back, eyes hurting. “Rozanov is engaged.” And just like that, the world stops. Shane blinks, and then blinks again. Surely he misheard. _______________ Shane hears a rumor in the locker room that Ilya Rozanov is engaged. He breaks his own heart by believing it without asking Ilya if it's true.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9,310
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #78223961
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please let me die on the street where you live by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-24
Shane takes a hit on the ice. Is barely bruised, isn’t concussed, and is cleared to play in his next game.
Ilya spirals.
It starts to feel like the world is ending.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 18,286
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77466036
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Shane Hollander loved Ilya Rozanov, so much that it was going to kill him. He has to make the most of the time he has left after the Olympics, before the roots really take hold. AKA your basic Hanahaki Disease fic, full of pining, mild body horror, sex, and eventually some well-earned comfort.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 26,519
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #77220691
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when he got the call by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-24
”Shane,” a reporter from ESPN calls, “what is your comment on the plane crash?”
Shane does not know about any plane crash, but he is disconnected from the news anyway, especially on game day. He asks, “What plane crash?”
”The Ottawa Centaurs,” the reporter says, and Shane’s heart—stops.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Shane is in a press conference when he finds out about the plane crash.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,429
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #78242711
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Shane Hollander is traded to the Boston Bears after back to back Stanley Cup victories, to the surprise of everyone. Most of all, Ilya Rozanov, Captain of the Bears and long-time situationship of Shane Hollander.
The 2016-2017 Season is going to be very interesting.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 12,343
- Chapters:
- 3/?
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77544511