61 – 80 of 92 Works in Mental Health Issues
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Ilya sees a lot of things about Shane that he never has to tell him. He can tell when Shane can’t deal with the casual touches. He never pushes him about his insane urges to get up at 5 AM to go for a run. Even in the off-season. And he especially avoids any and all direct talk about food. Or at least how weird Shane is about food. But it’s been getting worse. Sometimes, when the spiralling in his brain is impossible to break out of, Shane will stand in the kitchen, staring at his fridge, counting and calculating proportions and calories, and will feel like nothing he could possibly eat would be good for him. Like every single piece of food in his house, will come with a negative repercussion that will ruin his entire life. Because hockey is everything. And if Shane doesn’t have this body, then he can’t play hockey. And then what is he good for?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,853
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77568461
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Shane nearly stops himself right there, runs through all of the ways he could navigate away from the question, but when he opens his mouth it comes right out anyway. "Was he hard on you too?" Or Ilya had been waiting for the other shoe to drop. He just hadn’t expected it to be about this, hadn’t expected, or maybe simply refused to accept, that his father would somehow still hurt him beyond the grave, that the punches and split lips and broken ribs would still, impossibly, ache within him after all this time. or Shane tries to talk to Ilya about his past. It doesn't go as planned.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,313
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77575121
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Shane Hollander was caught kissing his boyfriend and rival, Ilya Rozanov, in the background of a video. He feels as if his world is crashing. Ilya is done hiding and Shane is terrified of the fallout. Shane chooses love but at what cost?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 14,018
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77479421
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To Sleep, Perchance to Dream by papisadhu
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-11
In some cruel twist of fate, Ilya can only recall his mother’s face in his nightmares.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,944
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77483526
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lost color in my face by Pale_Blue
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-11
“Do not worry,” Ilya breathed against his lips. As if Shane had a choice in the matter. As if worry hadn’t kept Shane awake past midnight for weeks, as if he wasn’t scared to leave the house for too long in case Ilya did something stupid in his absence. He’d promised he wouldn’t. Several times over. Shane wanted to believe him, he did, but the worse Ilya’s depression got the more hollow the promise felt. “I always worry about you,” Shane said softly, pushing Ilya’s hair back from his forehead.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,446
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77500956
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When the Pike's babysitter falls through, Ilya drives to Montreal to babysit the kids while the Montreal team is in playoffs. Just 6000 words of babysitting and a little bit of Ilya being vulnerable.
- Part 3 of Heated Rivalry Oneshots
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,788
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77470876
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before those hands pulled me from the earth by byulelle
Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
2026-01-10
It was a start, Shane knew that. And no matter what happened, he’d help Ilya. Always, as promised forever. They were going to win a hundred more Stanleys, retire, have children, and grow old together. The soil was damp, cold, and suffocating as the other digs into the earth with bare hands, with a single-minded intensity to free each ragged and stifled breath from the clutches of the loam. And with a new dawning of the sun, Ilya would find himself feeling its rays. Tonight wasn’t a good night, but tomorrow was a new day. ; 5 tells and signs Ilya is going through a depressive episode, and the ways Shane tries to help him through it.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,344
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77437541
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Shane thinks he's doing a good job at hiding the truth behind his performance diet.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 13,755
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #72263701
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No Further Questions by pause_to_read
Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
2026-01-08
Shane has spent his entire career rising above it. After one dirty hit, one slur, and one question too many, he stops. A press conference becomes a confession—and a line is finally drawn.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 27,045
- Chapters:
- 3/?
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76307726
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you can ebb and I can flow (and we'll take it slow) by foxjournals
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-08
Shane hears him, loud and clear, but it’s like his words are suddenly shallow and hollow, coming in bits and pieces as they funnel through one ear and out the other, and he swears he’s listening, swears he’s trying to hang onto every word out of his boyfriend's mouth, but that white hot static is louder than ever. His brain feels fuzzy and his eyes blur and whether it’s from unshed tears he hasn’t noticed yet or for another reason completely, he isn’t sure. He isn’t sure how he got from point A to point B, but all he knows is suddenly he can’t breathe. Suddenly, he’s six feet under, water encasing his lungs as they shrivel and expand into nothing. Or: Shane and Ilya get into a fight, and the only way out is through panicking Or: Shane uses a safeword in the middle of an argument
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,007
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #77306591
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sweet potato casserole, halved by crackedskies (mirroredskies), mirroredskies
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-07
Shane had made so much progress in the past year and a half. Between therapy and playing for Ottawa, he was in a much better place mentally. And yet. Yet, today, he felt like his body wasn’t his own, like his bones weren’t fit together quite right, like his muscle and flesh and all the bits underneath were just wrong. “It’s the,” he started again, squeezing his eyes shut to block out the knowing look in Ilya’s. “It’s the idea of putting it on my plate, in my mouth. It’s not good… For me.” Shane and Ilya host Christmas dinner for the first time, and Shane struggles with the sweet potato casserole. Takes place following the events of The Long Game
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,652
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77242386
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"You have to come to the locker room. Now."
Shane frowns. Holds up his notebook. "I'm busy."
"Forget that, man. It's all over the news. Ilya Rozanov has just defected from the Soviet Union."
Red Army superstar Ilya Rozanov defects from the Soviet Union. A Cold War-era hockey au
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 79,518
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Files:
- 4 versions
- AO3:
- #75927071
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Ilya should really talk to Shane about what's been weighing on him, but he can't. He can't because Shane's life is perfect, and he made Ilya's life perfect, and Ilya can't bring himself to change that. So he focuses on the 2025 hockey camp of the Irina Foundation and buries his feelings, because it has always worked so wonderfully for him. But he is sinking.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,372
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77085946
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hand to mouth (i'm getting by) by Pale_Blue
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-04
The box lay on the table between them and Ilya scowled at it. Antidepressants. He could practically hear his father scoffing from beyond the grave.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,584
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77062251
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Lay Your Head on Me by madeleineh32
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-04
Shane had made a joke, a passing quip, that if only they could somehow defy biology and reproduce naturally, that their child would be an unstoppable force of a hockey player. Hereditary. Genetic. Those were the words he’d used. Ilya knew what they meant. Or: Ilya thinks about what may have been passed onto him from his parents, and Shane comforts him. Ilya inhaled a shaky breath. He was, perhaps, overthinking. But also maybe he wasn’t. It had been an innocent, playful conversation about kids. Shane and him often spoke of their hypothetical children, joyfully imaging their lives post-hockey. They weren’t quite there yet, but it was something that, for a while, had been definitely mapped out in their future. So why was he breathing like the room was going to run out of oxygen? “Ilya?” Shane rested a careful hand on Ilya’s thigh. They were sat outside, the evening chill only just beginning to settle on their skin. The fire Shane had made was still flickering, though, casting a warm orange glow upon both men. “M’fine.” Ilya’s words were stilted, decidedly un-fine as he choked them out. He puffed out his cheeks, exhaling again, slower this time, furiously swiping at his eyes which were beginning to prickle with the threat of tears. He would not cry about this. “Come here,” Shane murmured, pulled Ilya sideways. He was like putty, folding immediately and nestling his head in Shane’s lap. It was warm, safe as Shane interlaced his fingers through Ilya’s hair. His other hand ran up and down Ilya’s arm, over the goosebumps that had raised the skin on his biceps. He sniffed once, then again. Blinked. Let his eyes lose focus as he watched the flames licking the sides of the fire-pit. “Is stupid,” Ilya muttered. “No.” “Da.” “What is it? You don’t… want kids?” Shane asked carefully, his voice measured. Ilya could tell, though, from years of hearing Shane’s voice in every capacity, that it was tinged with fear, fear of the answer. Ilya’s sure Shane knows that’s not the case; they spoke about kids often. Ilya loved kids, was great with them, and Shane knows that. He huffed out a laugh. Swiped at his eyes again. Nudged his head further into Shane’s lap, let Shane’s hand tighten against his scalp. He brought his other hand up and pressed it against Ilya’s forehead. Shane knew that always grounded him for some reason, having the pressure on his head. Stopped the noise somewhat. “When we say we adopt - of course. That is okay. I want that.” He hears Shane exhale, feels him relax slightly. “But when you say…” his English seemed to fail him. It always seemed to when he got like this. He shut his eyes, sighing with frustration. Shane had made a joke, a passing quip, that if only they could somehow defy biology and reproduce naturally, that their child would be an unstoppable force of a hockey player. Hereditary. Genetic. Those were the words he’d used. Ilya knew what they meant. “Take your time.” Shane’s hands wander back into Ilya’s hair, more gentle than the earlier pressure. “About our child being best hockey player. Genetics. DNA. Heredit–” He groans in frustration again. “Hereditary,” Shane finishes off softly. “Da. That.” Ilya’s hand reached up and he wraps his fingers around Shane’s wrist. “I was thinking. I am glad we cannot have baby. Together.” Shane’s confusion is palpable even without Ilya being able to see his face. He liked this about Shane. He liked being able to explain things to him in a way that made sense, because it made things make more sense in his own head, too. Shane just hums, urging Ilya to continue. “We know I am depressed, yes?” Shane’s fingers curl into his hair. “Like my mother. Maybe not same, exactly. But similar. Probably… hereditary.” He says the word slowly, testing it on his tongue. He hates the way his accent wraps around the syllables. He wishes Shane knew Russian, fluently. He wishes that he could ramble away, go off on tangents, not have to think everything through in both Russian and then English. He wishes he could speak perfect English. Perfect accent like Shane when he speaks French. Perfect Shane and his perfect genetics. He wishes he didn’t get wound up like this. He spirals so easily these days. He wishes he wasn’t so depressed. He wishes his mother hadn’t been depressed. Stop fucking spiralling. He feels his heart rate pick up again, hears his breathing go shallow. “Ilya.” Shane’s voice is grounding. It’s stern, without being unkind. He inhales again, deeply, his fingers pressing more into Shane’s wrist. “Sorry.” His voice is thick, and his mouth feels dry. Shane presses his hand against Ilya’s head again, and he leans into the pressure. “We’re managing it, though.” Shane’s voice is quiet as he cuts through the easing tension that hangs in the air. “Together.” “Yes.” Ilya pauses before speaking again. “Dementia is also hereditary,” He lets his words sit between them, hears Shane exhale as the other shoe drops. “That’s what you’re worried about?” Ilya lifts his hand in a shrug. “Yes, Shane. I think that is something anyone would worry about, no?” He doesn’t mean to sound like an asshole, especially not to Shane. “Okay, asshole.” Shane’s voice doesn’t hold any venom, only fondness, a little sad, even. Ilya almost smirks. They sit in silence for a moment, Shane carding his hands through Ilya’s curls, the crackle of the fire the only thing filling the absence of words for a moment. He speaks again.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,335
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77083736
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Shane’s heart drops into his stomach. “Ilya,” he breathes. His vision goes blurry, throat tight. He tries to swallow it down and focus, shove his swirling thoughts into a neat little box, but it’s impossible. He feels—he might throw up, actually. “Are you seriously telling me you tried to fucking kill yourself?” “Yes,” Ilya agrees blandly, “It did not work.” Ilya calls Shane from the hospital. Shane handles it very normally.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,118
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #77098971
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think how you will grieve for all you leave behind by justhockey
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-04
He used to visit his mother all the time when he was in Moscow for the off-season. He’d take bouquets of marigolds and sunflowers, and he’d decorate her grave with them to try and brighten it up. He’d even placed a little solar powered lantern there for nighttime, so she wouldn’t feel so frightened of the dark. It’s silly, probably. He knows she isn’t really there; knows that nothing is left of her but bones, by now. But still. Ilya had left it there anyway, just in case. He’ll never get to visit his mama’s grave again.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,429
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 3 versions
- AO3:
- #77083311
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Shane spirals after a disastrous interview.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,754
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76670186
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“That he doesn’t need to be coddled and watched 24/7 just because he tried to take his own life. He has to show that he isn’t fucking crazy.”
- Part 2 of Irina Rozanova haunts the narrative
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,774
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76985031
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And that night I was happy. by thesumofentropy
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-03
Shane swallows the lump in his throat. “We need your help.” Yuna sounds slightly concerned, her voice tinny through the phone. “Is everything alright? Should we drive over?” “Yeah, um—we have a, uh. A—” “A baby,” Ilya finishes. “You are a grandmother now. Surprise.” “Sorry, did you—” Yuna pauses. They can hear David faintly in the background. “You mean, like, a baby animal? A puppy?” “A wishbaby,” Shane croaks. There’s silence on the other end of the line. “Surprise,” Ilya says again. Shane and Ilya win the Stanley Cup. They weren't exactly planning to also win a baby.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,692
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76986356