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  1. 'I have seen your charity in her name, Mama should not be forgotten.' The note was short and to the point, no love for Ilya from his brother was scrawled into the familiar letters. But there was love for their mother there, and there was the fact that Andrei had sent it at all. - Ilya's brother sends a parcel containing home video from Ilya's childhood to Canada. Ilya never expected to receive a parcel from his brother after five years of no contact, and He never expected to hear his mother's voice again.

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    AO3:
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  2. Shane was leaving. Ilya kept trying to call out to him, to explain, to stop him, but the words were all stuck in his chest. Shane Hollander was leaving.

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  3. They sat in silence for a few seconds and watched the surf rolling in and out, in and out. Shane eased one knee up, resting his arm across it, watching Ilya out of the corner of his eye with infinite patience. “You wanna talk about it?” he asked, voice soft enough that the wind almost stole it. He did want to talk. His chest was full of words. Too full. But the idea of opening all that up? Of watching Shane recoil, or worse, watching him care? It was unbearable. The thought of being comforted by Shane, of feeling that warmth and knowing he couldn’t keep it, nearly crushed him. Ilya kept his eyes on the water, jaw tight. Shane reached out slowly and carefully and let the tip of one finger trace the outside of Ilya’s forearm. Just a whisper of contact. A question, not a demand. Ilya looked at him. Shane gave a small tilt of his hand, beckoning him closer. “Come here.” **** A deviation from the All-Star weekend in Tampa: Instead of finding Shane on the bench, it’s Ilya alone with his ghosts and falling apart in ways he never lets anyone see. Until Shane sits beside him. The tide is ceaseless and the night is heavy. Canon diverges; feelings don't.

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  4. What if Ilya and Shane never had that fight on Boxing Day? What if he never told Shane how he felt about hiding their relationship? an alternate(sadder) version of how that conversation in chapter 22 could have gone, set in the long game :(

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  5. “And what about the sad Russian gay kids who want to see me succeed?” “The sad Russian gay kids have already seen you succeed. You are an MLH champion married to a man.” “Yeah, in another country,” Ilya added. Because that is the full picture. You can succeed, sure, if luck is on your side. But even then, you can’t do it there.

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  6. Then the sound comes. It isn’t like the other creaks. It’s sharper. Deeper. Wrong. Shane feels it before he understands it, a sudden vibration beneath his feet, a jolt straight through his bones. He looks up, mouth already forming Ilya’s name. The ice fractures under Ilya in a split second. There’s a crack like a gunshot, the surface splintering outward, and then Ilya is gone. Swallowed by black water that surges violently up through the hole. “Ilya!” Shane’s skates scrape uselessly as he tries to stop, heart slamming so hard it knocks the air from his lungs. He drops to his knees a few meters back, terrified to get closer, terrified not to. Steam curls up from the water like breath in the freezing air. Time breaks. One second. Two. Three. Nothing. - Shane and Ilya enjoy their Christmas break at Shane's cottage, until Ilya falls through the ice as they skate on the lake.

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  7. “Ilya hasn’t been very well recently.” Shane swallowed, he hated saying that out loud, “Not for a long time actually.” ~ Ilya's depression is flat, still and cold like water, sometimes he thinks it might drown him. The Hollanders are here to help him float. (Or Ilya has a bad day, Yuna notices, and in the Hollander household love and support are given by force.)

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  8. An A/B/O secret nesting fic. The 5 times Shane steals clothes from Ilya and the 1 time he gets caught, plus his reaction. Inspired by the staircase scene where Shane is holding onto Ilya's hoodie :)

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  9. It had been two days since Shane had surprised Ilya, and they’d had so much sex that Shane genuinely wasn’t sure if he would be able to make it to practice that morning. His lower back ached, his legs ached, but it was honestly a pleasant ache. It was a constant reminder every time Shane moved that he was married to the love of his life and that even after all these years sex was mindblowing and insane regardless of how often they had it. But it was the first time he would be seeing the team since that night at the club, and he could feel the shit he was going to get. or: a short little follow up oneshot of the cens teasing ilya and shane in the locker room a few days after The Lingerie Incident

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  10. Normally he would never. Normally he keeps this tight, locked behind his ribs, measured and careful and quiet. Normally every thought about Ilya gets sorted before it ever reaches his mouth. He makes sure nothing sounds like too much. But the medication has loosened something he usually keeps wound tight. It has softened the reflex that tells him to stop, to swallow words back down before they can do damage. His thoughts drift instead of snapping into line, and his feelings rise up faster than he can push them away. Once the words start, they do not want to stop. They feel good coming out, like easing pressure he did not realize was building. — hospital scene where high shane spills his feelings about ilya :)

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  11. After a violent incident, Shane Hollander's management team and parents hire him a bodyguard. Enter Ilya Rozanov.

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    AO3:
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  12. Ilya stands in the hallway of Shane’s parents’ house with his boots still on, shoulders slightly hunched, fingers worrying the sleeve of his sweater. He’s been here before, plenty of times, but tonight feels different. Tonight means something. Christmas lights glow along the banister, warm gold reflected in the windowpanes, and somewhere deeper in the house there’s the low murmur of voices and the clink of dishes. He leans toward Shane and whispers, for the third time since they parked the car. “Are you sure it’s okay? Like, really okay?” Shane smiles at him, soft and fond, the way he does when he understands exactly what’s going on in Ilya’s head. He cups Ilya’s elbow, thumb brushing reassurance into skin. “Yes,” he says gently. “They want you here. I want you here.” Ilya nods, even though his chest still feels too full, like something might spill over if he breathes wrong. Christmas with a family. A real one. Not a hotel, not a team dinner, not a quiet night pretending it doesn’t matter. This matters so much it scares him. - Ilya's first Christmas with the Hollanders.

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  13. Hayden knew he wasn’t stupid. Well, not completely. Well, he felt like he was pretty smart about some things, and, okay, a little oblivious about others. Still, he liked to think he was pretty far from stupid—especially when compared to his fellow hockey players. Like, he’d known that Shane had that off-and-on thing with that girl in Boston, Lily, for years. He didn’t know much more than that, and he especially didn’t know why Shane was so cagey about it, but his best friend was admittedly pretty weird about everything. - Slight AU where Shane comes out to Hayden and J.J. around the time he breaks up with Rose, but Lily's identity remains a secret. For now.

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  14. “Are you the boyfriend I’ve heard so much about? I was about wondering when we’d be seeing you!” Ilya’s breath catches in his chest, and his lungs feel deflated as he rushes to correct her. To explain himself, or to excuse himself. He manages a weak, “I— uh, no I—“ The nurse schools her expression, gives him a once over, and gets a look on her face like she has come to an understanding on the situation at hand. Ilya can almost guarantee that whatever she has come up with in her head, she is probably very wrong. — basically my take on the hospital scene idk shane can’t keep his mouth shut off the perc 50s

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  15. Boston lost. The Raiders are pissed. Ilya keeps waiting for the other shoe to drop.

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  16. Like with everything, on the ice it was simple—he wanted to win, he wanted to beat Ilya. He was his fiercest competitor and his equal. Off the ice, that faded away—for him, at least. Ilya always saw him as an equal, even when they were too young and dumb to admit it. But for Shane, when the skates were off and cotton sheets were beneath him, he didn’t want to be Ilya’s equal. He wanted to belong to him. It was why the briefest touch was enough to make him fall to his knees. It was why he’d beg just to see his cock—to touch it—to taste it. Desperate to take anything Ilya would give him, and too shy to ask for it. Because what right did he have to ask Ilya Rozanov for anything? No, he had to earn it with his words and tears and tongue. And he wouldn’t have it any other way.

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  17. “Kip, help,” Scott says. “Rozanov’s trying to make us play never have I ever because he never matured past the age of twelve.”

    “I am trying,” Ilya slurs more than says, “to make memories.”

    “Yeah, because you’re definitely gonna remember this tomorrow.”

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  18. Shane Hollander was good at keeping secrets. He’d been keeping a pretty big one for over ten years and nobody had found out about it that he hadn’t wanted to. The secret in question of course was that he was married to his arch-rival on the ice, Ilya Rozanov. In which Ilya takes a hit on the ice and Shane is forced to tell hosptial staff that he's his husband in order to see him, thus outing their big secret.

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    AO3:
    #76221806
  19. Ilya’s head hurts, his throat is dry as ash, but this man is HOT. Somewhere, a beeping noise accelerates, but Ilya only has eyes for this man. Or! Shane’s husband hits on him, then cries when Shane tells him he’s married.

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    AO3:
    #76189431
  20. After Russia crashes and burns at the Olympics, six months pass where Ilya cuts Shane out completely, refusing to answer his texts. So when they both get booked for yet another ad campaign, Shane arrives on set with a strict plan to ignore Ilya entirely. But then he learns the premise of the entire campaign: making fun of Ilya’s English. It will take a lot for Shane to forgive him, sure. It won’t take nearly as much for Shane to stand up for him.

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    AO3:
    #76191461
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