261 – 280 of 605 Works in Angst
- Angst ×
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Shane Hollander knows he’s not a small guy. Years of hockey and workouts have built up his muscles, and lucky genetics from his father’s side places him just shy of six feet. He’s checked hockey players half a foot and several pounds more than him, knocked Scott Hunter into the ice in the one fight he’s ever actually thrown hands in. But as much as Shane loves the game, the fast movements, passes, and team camaraderie, there were times where he could only feel regret at following the path of athletic fame. He puts on the media smile he practices in the mirror as he brushes his hair each day, uses the bright lights of press conferences to erase his view of the audience, and keeps his answers simple and focused on hockey.
The number of people outside the arena still makes him feel crushed in on all sides, small. Eyes trained on his face, cameras flashing, pens and cell phones being passed into his hands. The itch of it all settles under his skin.
@OttawaPoliceDispatch: Police have been dispatched to a house alarm in Galetta, On. Possible break in, destruction of property.
@OttawaOfficialPoliceDepartment: Recent Missing Persons Report filed for Shane William Hollander at 9:25 pm
Epilogue: 3/1
- Part 1 of 1100200's Hollanov Fanfics
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 81,009
- Chapters:
- 9/9
- Files:
- 3 versions
- AO3:
- #76566541
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you know my heart belongs to you / one last time, say that you want me too by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-02-28
“What is the price you are willing to pay to be free?”
After a failed raid, Captain Ilya Rozanov refuses to return empty-handed. He settles for a far more promising treasure: Shane Hollander, crown prince and the Queen’s only son. Taken aboard as ransom, Shane is meant to be nothing more than leverage in the negotiation between crown and pirates.
However, the lines between Shane being a captive of the captain and something else entirely soon begin to blur. The closer the exchange comes, the harder it becomes for them to resist the pull between them. The noose around their necks gradually tightens, and soon they must navigate between love, the longing for freedom, and duty.
⊹₊⟡⋆
A Hollanov slow burn Pirate AU- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 40,708
- Chapters:
- 9/9
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #78319166
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There is a strong scent of antiseptic in the air, the kind that always haunts hospitals and morgues. Ilya thinks it is fitting. He thinks, perhaps, that some vital organ of his is failing irreparably, and he is only waiting for a doctor to call out his time of death.
“You have lost your memories.” It’s not a question. Ilya’s burning hand drops from Shane’s cheek.
“Yeah,” Shane says easily. “Wait, shit, did no one tell you?”
“Is it temporary.” Ilya’s voice is hoarse, pleading. “This memory loss, is it… tell me that it is temporary.” Please, please, God. I know I promised to give anything up, but-
Shane looks at Ilya with wide eyes. “They don’t know,” he says gently. He seems to be catching onto Ilya’s distress despite the drugs in his system.
Ilya feels cold all over. Yes, any moment now, they will cover him with a white sheet and take him away.
Shane's concussion in S01E05 leaves him missing his memories from the last decade. Ilya is now the only person in the world who knows the truth about him and Shane, and is forced to question whether to burden Shane with their complicated relationship or to walk away.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 28,332
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #78908881
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Odd-Man Rush: The situation that occurs when a team enters the attacking zone and outnumbers the opposing players in the zone.
Or,
Shane doesn’t know why he still feels so off-kilter. He should be the happiest he’s ever been—he won the Cup, he feels like he’s maybe starting to have a few friends on his team, and he’s finally starting to believe his parents when they tell him he won’t get traded again. He should be on top of the world, but sometimes he still feels like the lone defender on an odd-man rush, skating as fast as he can to prevent what feels like an inevitable outcome.
The problem is that he’s not quite sure which outcome it is that he’s trying to stop.
- Part 2 of Home Ice Advantage
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 13,616
- Chapters:
- 2/?
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #79830331
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They met at thirteen in a locker room that smelled like sweat and cheap detergent. Shane thought he'd forget the loud Russian boy with the crooked smile. He didn't. Years later, they're drafted to the same team. Teammates. Strangers. Except Shane still knows exactly where Ilya is on the ice without looking. Some habits never die.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 82,818
- Chapters:
- 20/20
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #79323296
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a texting fic about falling in love when you are a closeted professional hockey player.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,428
- Chapters:
- 7/7
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #80153826
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Haunting Your City by mightyd0lphin
Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
2026-02-26
“What is there to talk about?” “What’s there to talk about?!” Hollander scoffed, shaking his head. “You’re playing for my fucking team!” “I know.” “Why did you have to go and get traded?! You realise we’re going to have to see each other every day from now on, and play together, and-” “Yes,” Ilya interrupted. He didn’t want to know how long Hollander’s list was. “I know.” Hollander took a deep breath. “Okay, listen,” he said. “Just so we’re clear - we don’t know each other outside of playing against each other, right?” “Right.” “And we can’t- can’t hook up anymore.” ~ OR: Ilya gets traded to Montreal in October 2014. He's lonely, and angry, and he misses Boston. He doesn't know if it helps that Hollander is there or not. title from Buckle by Florence and the Machine
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 93,307
- Chapters:
- 30/30
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #78511096
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Shane desperately needs a job and applies to be a House Omega, not realizing it is for a member of the Russian mob.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 29,529
- Chapters:
- 20/20
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #77970626
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What would have happened if Shane Hollander and Rose Landry really had stayed together? Shane was running from himself and trying to push down his consuming feelings for his rival, Ilya Rozanov. He couldn’t let himself fall in love and would do anything to stop it, even if that meant staying with his beautiful actress girlfriend. He would do anything to keep his secret, despite destroying his relationship with Ilya to do so.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,674
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #80124541
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Ilya hasn’t planned on meeting Shane’s parents after only three days at the cottage. He sure as hell hasn’t planned on dying that very same day, only to wake up in his childhood home in Moscow. The year is 2004, he’s twelve again, and his mother is still alive.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 14,174
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #78187056
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heat seeker (the many names of ilya rozanov) by Anonymous
Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
2026-02-23
Ilya Rozanov has always understood the power of a name.
On the ice, it’s a threat.
In headlines, it’s a brand.
In Boston, it’s a chant.But in Moscow, it was once a lullaby.
And in Shane Hollander’s voice, it becomes something softer. Something dangerous. Something that makes Ilya want more than he was ever meant to have.From a golden kitchen in Moscow to the roar of Boston crowds, from hotel rooms and tuna melts to hospital monitors and wedding vows, this is the story of how a boy who learned what silence feels like finds someone who refuses to stop saying his name.
And maybe—just maybe—that’s what saves him.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 24,296
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #80091786
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Shane wakes up one morning in the cottage where he spends his summers with his husband. Except his husband isn't there, and everything is wrong.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 37,213
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #78924371
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say whatever you feel (be wherever you are) by minnieishere
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-02-22
Ilya shifted him gently, until Shane was half across his chest, head tucked under Ilya’s chin. The steady thump of his heartbeat under his ear was a metronome for Shane’s still unsteady rhythm. Shane let his eyes close. The thrumming in his chest was still there, quieter now but never totally gone. But recognising he wasn’t alone, that Ilya would never leave him alone steeled his nerves. or five times Shane Hollander needs a little support, and one time Ilya Rozanov does too.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 8,966
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #80023491
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Buckle On Your Belt by bunniesarebad
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-02-22
Shane has a new thing he does in bed now. He says: “Tell me I’m your favorite." "Tell me I suck you better than anyone else." "Tell me I’m the best fuck." Ilya knows he must have wanted to say this before, but thought it was too revealing. He still only says it when he’s pretty lost in what they’re doing. Ilya loves it. Loves anytime Shane is desperate and possessive and needy. It’s one of his favorite ways for Shane to be. He thinks this, and he doesn’t think anything else because he is very stupid, maybe. He says “yes yes yes” and watches Shane light up. Sometimes he says “I don’t know” just to make him blush harder, work harder, cry harder. Get even hungrier underneath him. ... Instead of Ilya pitching an open relationship in TLG, he finds out Shane thinks they already have one. Or: Ilya finally realizes how deeply he fucked Shane up by conditioning him to accept that he would never be enough for Ilya. He tries to address this insecurity in true tuna-melt fashion by showing Shane fuckboy-era sex tapes of himself with other people. Somehow, they still manage to work it out. The first time it comes up they’re still in that happy, sunshine-filled, impossible bubble. Those two weeks at the cottage, the very first time. Shane is hanging over his shoulder, pretending to supervise the way he’s frying bacon, actually just abusing the fact that they can touch as often as they want for the first time in a decade. Ilya cannot even tease him about this because he does the same thing. Finds himself plastered to Shane’s back while he showers, “helping” him take out the trash, generally being a nuisance and high on the fact that the only thing it causes is laughter, teasing. No leaving. No breaking the thing they have between them. No clock counting down minutes until he has to pretend to want to leave. “Sorry Ottawa has, like, no nightlife,” Shane says, like Ilya has any idea what he’s talking about when he’s speaking mostly into the side of his neck. He wiggles his head so he can kiss the side of Shane’s ear, edging Shane further back so he isn’t at risk of getting popped with the grease. “How will I survive the boredom, you think?” Shane laughs and it’s like someone plugged in Ilya’s cord, like he’s switched on, like he’s powered by Shane’s joy and noises and the smile he can feel against his skin. “Wellll, I’m not always here, you know. Almost never during the season. You’ll still have to spend a bunch of time bored here by yourself. Although, it’s not too far a drive to Montreal.” Shane’s smile is fading now, he can feel it where they’re still pressed together. “Is okay. When my boring boyfriend is not here, his boring family says I am welcome anytime.” And Shane is melting, grinning at that, and Ilya decides the bacon is done enough. It’s not like Shane will agree to eat any of it anyway. He doesn’t even know to be scared then. It’s so small. … Three months later Shane has a new thing he does in bed now. He says, “Tell me I’m your favorite, tell me I suck you better than anyone else, tell me I’m the best fuck”. Ilya knows he must have wanted to say this before, but thought it was too revealing. He still only says it when he’s pretty lost in what they’re doing. Ilya loves it. Loves anytime Shane is desperate and possessive and needy. It’s one of his favorite ways for Shane to be. He thinks this, and he doesn’t think anything else because he is very stupid, maybe. He says “yes yes yes” and watches Shane light up. Sometimes he says “I don’t know” just to make him blush harder, work harder, cry harder. Get even hungrier underneath him. ... Another month passes and it is hard, being Shane’s boyfriend. Much better and much easier but much harder too, than just being Lily. He’s never been owned before like this. Except by the team who holds his contract, or his obligations to his family, his country. This type of owning feels freer. But it also means he has significantly less ways to make himself forget how far away he is from what he wants. How many things could happen that would break this forever. How long it’s going to be before he can see Shane again. It’s easier at home because of his team, or when he plays in Ottawa and Montreal because of Yuna and David, who he really does like to spend time with. It feels greedy almost, like he’s tricking them, when he comes over and gets all that care and attention and he hasn’t even brought Shane. They overlook this loss and act like he’s supposed to be there anyway. When he’s on the road in other cities and won’t see Shane for a while his fantasies get weirder and more embarrassing than they even were before all this, which is saying something. He wants to quit his job. Be Shane’s puck bunny. WAG maybe. Follow him on the road, show up in the WAGS section with some little kid who looks like Shane on his lap. Make him weird macrobiotic food and ask about his day and drop off his dry cleaning. He might actually consider it if it wouldn’t mean never getting Shane on the ice again, which is simply unbearable, even more than being 1000 miles away and not even getting a text back because his boyfriend is busy with some event. Shane never mentions it and he rarely mentions it to Shane except to say 53 days, 14 days, 2 days. He thinks there’s no point in talking about what they can’t change. He thinks they’re in that together. … One of his favorite parts of being a boyfriend, on the very very long list of favorite things that include not having to pretend he doesn’t want to lick Shane’s freckles at literally every opportunity and getting to hear Shane talk about him in the future tense is ditching condoms. He thinks it can’t feel much different for Shane, at least during, but Shane was made in a laboratory specifically to drive him insane with lust and comes faster when they don’t use them, just from knowing they’re that much closer, just from thinking about how Ilya’s going to stay in him afterwards, dripping out slow, leaving him just slightly less empty. He tells him this with his cheeks red and his lips all puffy and his eyes glazed over and his hand rubbing his lower stomach like he can feel where Ilya’s come inside him. This is lucky for Ilya because Ilya absolutely comes way faster than usual. He keeps thinking he’s going to get used to it but so far that is not the case. It’s still so much fucking hotter, wetter, softer he ends up ordering Shane to come before him. Or pulling out and eating Shane as a breather before he keeps on fucking into him, all messy and open and so sensitive he tears up and smacks into Ilya’s back with his heels. What a hardship. So, part of him is kind of relieved when Shane wants to keep using them sometimes. He’s not completely surprised. Shane mostly drops his aversion to all things mess when he pops a boner but it comes back tragically fast in the aftermath when the sheets are wet and tangled up and the pillows aren’t in the right place. He’s completely insane and Ilya loves it, loves him, loves being ordered to grab a towel for gods sake. So whenever Shane kind of awkwardly asks about using condoms again sometimes, he doesn’t mind at all. It just means he can focus on driving Shane out of his mind and crawling inside him and not having to do English language conjugations in his head to keep from going off too fast like he hasn’t had to since he was a teenager, before Shane ruined him, turned him into whatever he was now. If there’s a pattern to when Shane asks, if it lines up
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,557
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #80069411
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At first Ilya thinks it’s a dream. What else could it be?
-or-
Ilya wishes on the cup and wakes up with Shane in his bed
- Part 5 of Hollanov fics
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,450
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #80009651
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TROY:
Is there such a thing as a player walk out? Like what if we just refused to play our game on Monday?Or: The first few days after Shane and Ilya are outed, as told by group chats and social media
- Part 1 of the sum of its parts
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,766
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #78301481
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Shane’s preferences are simple: older, rougher, married men who lie to their wives and gone before morning.
Ilya Rozanov is nineteen, Russian, and already moving into his dorm.
Cue in covert hookups, stupidly questionable life choices, and a rookie who stares at Shane like he’s a particularly fascinating bug under a microscope.
Now he has to explain why he keeps getting texts from "Mr. Chicago" while trying to teach this kid how to use the campus laundry without melting his sweaters.
Campus life promised new experiences. It failed to mention the experience of being psychologically dissected over instant ramen by a stupidly handsome blond Russian who hasn't blinked in seven minutes.
This fic is finished! You can binge-read it now 😁
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 54,863
- Chapters:
- 15/15
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77726161
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So Much Of You Is Left Behind by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-02-21
Loud beeps from his phone startled Ilya, and he slowed down, reaching for the device he’d put on the bar between his legs. Jane. He smiled to himself when he saw the notifications, and, checking Marlowe was absorbed in his own fitness, opened it quickly, smiling in anticipation of Shane's words.
The smile was wiped off his face almost instantly.
The blood drained from his face, and Ilya felt like the bottom had just fallen out of his world.
*****
Maybe he was naive, but Ilya always thought he had time. Time with Shane. Time to tell him what he truly meant to him.
That, somehow, one way or another, Shane would always be there.
But a text message late one night threatens to destroy the future that Ilya has spent the time carefully constructing in his mind.
Maybe Shane wasn't always going to be there. That Shane would be cruelly snatched away from him before he had a chance to be honest.
That he would be left behind. Alone.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 56,411
- Chapters:
- 13/13
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #79140611
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Carrying your love with me by Thiamsalpha
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-02-21
While Ilya is away in Moscow, Shane struggles with the quietness in their apartment. What starts as a moment of weakness turns into a nightly habit when Shane begins wearing Ilya's jersey to sleep.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,498
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #79971186
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crystal, come right in by weeb_grass
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-02-21
“You're being cruel, Ilya. Please just— stop.” Pain blooms across Ilya's expression, a brief lapse in form. He's quick to recover, furrowing his brow and pursing his lips, like Shane’s made more than a simple request, like he's got Rose Landry here in his lap, parading her around like Ilya has with all his women since rookie year. Like he has any right to that pain. “Oh, so this is what it takes to make you say my name without freaking out.” Or: Shane does not go home with Rose after the club.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 8,083
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #79990241