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  1. [Ilya] HOLLANDER

    [Ilya] SHANE

    [Ilya] THERE IS A MONSTER IN MY DRIVEWAY

    [Ilya] I THINK IT WANTS TO MURDER ME

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    AO3:
    #85630801
  2. “Shane.. sometimes I get this weird feeling that you have this whole other life that no one knows anything about."

    Why did Shane stop breathing and freeze the moment he said that?

    He decided to push just a little. “So it’s not just Boston Lily.” Whom he wasn’t seeing in Boston anymore, but was still talking to, actually now more than ever. “You’ve got other stuff going on that you don’t tell me about.”

    “Do you tell me everything?”

    “Just about!” Hayden replied in frustration. “But at this point, bud, if you told me you had a secret family somewhere or something, I’d be like… yeah, that tracks.”

    Language:
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    AO3:
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  3.  

    @Rozanov81:

    Ok internet, I have announcement.

    I am getting married in 2 weeks.

    So we are going to play a game, ok? I give you one clue every day, we will see if you can guess

    #SecretRelationship #ILoveYouJane

    -----
    With each new daily clue, the Hollanov fans only get louder. Each clue lining up perfectly with a certain Canadian hockey player.

    However, they still cannot convince anyone. If anything, their overflow of online excitement might make it seem less believable.

    Ilya notices the plight of these modern Casandras of the internet age and, of course, decides to make it worse.

    -----
    Told through snapshots from twitter, Instagram, the Ottawa WAGs group chat and Ilya’s journey into the depths of Reddit to find r/HollanovHQ

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    AO3:
    #85644951
  4. Shane Hollander has spent his entire career being composed, professional, and quiet about the things that have been said to him on the ice.

    Tonight, Gilbert Comeau says the wrong thing.

    To the wrong man.

    In the wrong arena.

    A standalone companion piece to "Breaking Room".

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    AO3:
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  5. The Hollanders visit David's family for his mother's 100th birthday. It goes about as well as you'd expect. ~ And now was time for a sacred Hollander family (well, really Shane and Yuna) tradition: the debrief. “So, how was that for your first Hollander family function?” Yuna asked Ilya. He shrugged. “I can see why you do not visit often.”

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    1/1
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    1
    AO3:
    #85597021
  6. But Hayden had laughed, made a crack about being Shane’s excuse to go back to the room, and led the way down to the crowd that was headed out to celebrate their victory. Even though Hayden made it through about two beers before he started laying his head down on the table between rounds.

    So maybe it wasn’t so surprising that his drunk, exhausted, possibly sick friend had reached the point of mental overwhelm where holding someone’s hand became instinct.

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    AO3:
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  7. Dykstra: Today is the day!
    Hollander: Remind me why Ilya and I are the ones taking them?
    Bood: You and Roz already handle Luca’s doctor’s appointments anyways
    Bood: It was only a matter of time.
    Chouinard: That fact is still crazy to me.
    Harris: Mom and Dad taking their kids to the doctor!

    OR

    The Centaurs rookies need to get their wisdom teeth out. Why not together and all at once? Oh also Shane and Ilya are responsible for them. Mostly Shane.

    Language:
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    AO3:
    #85544976
  8. Shane Hollander arrives in Vegas with a question he hasn’t spoken out loud.

    It isn’t complicated, exactly. It’s just the kind of question that requires honesty he isn’t sure he’s ready for - about what he and Ilya Rozanov have been doing for the past few years, about what six months of silence after Sochi actually meant, and about whether any of it is worth staying close to or whether he finally needs to go.

    He gets his answer in a locked bathroom at the NHL Awards.

    Ilya spends the summer convinced that Shane is fine. Upset? Yes. Angry? Definitely. But Shane always felt things fiercely despite what everyone said about him when he had his back turned. He’d calm down over the summer and then he’d be there like he always had been. He fills the silence with discipline and routine and the comfortable certainty that later is still available to him.

    He’s wrong.

    By the time Ilya understands what he actually lost, Shane is already gone; and Ilya is left trying to find a way back to someone who closed the door long before Ilya had ever thought to just walk through it.

    Language:
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    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #84850786
  9. oh my god

    Connors: it wasn't your fault marly he came out of nowhere you couldn't have anticipated it

    oh my god

    there was so much blood

    i cant fucking breathe

    Carmichael: where are you marly

    i hurt hollander

    fuck i swear i didn't mean to

    in which: Shane hollander is injured, subsequent issues are addressed, and one of our main-but-also-somehow-side-characters makes his true debut.

    Language:
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    AO3:
    #85582956
  10. One day the drawers in Shane's kitchen turned on him. One by one they all turned squeaky and slow. And of course, the fucking repair guy is on vacation for the next week and a half. or. Overstimulated Shane and Softy Sweety Ilya. Shane stood at the stove stirring oatmeal with slow, methodical motions while Ilya leaned against the island in a pair of sweatpants that should have been retired years ago. “Too many blueberries, relax.” Shane said without looking up. “There is no such thing.” “There absolutely is when you are feeding all of them to the dog.” Anya looked up immediately at the sound of her title, enormous brown eyes alert and hopeful. The tiny girl sat perfectly between Ilya’s feet, tail brushing rapidly against the hardwood. “She is starving. my poor baby” Ilya informed him solemnly. “She ate breakfast already.” “She is growing girl.” “She’s six.” “Still growing, where you done growing at six? Did not think so.” Shane snorted quietly. Ilya grinned at the sound. It had been almost two months since they’d gotten married and somehow mornings still felt strange in the best possible way. Domesticity had settled over their lives slowly. It was coffee mugs left beside the sink. Grocery lists. Arguing over laundry settings until Shane pouted and Ilya caved. Falling asleep together every night without worrying who might find out. It was oatmeal on a Tuesday morning. Shane liked routines. He liked knowing what came next. His therapist called it grounding structure. Shane called it not feeling insane all the time. Ilya understood that now in a way he hadn’t ten years ago. “Did you answer Hayden?” Shane asked. “Mhm.” “What did he say about dinner Friday?” “He says if we make quinoa again he is not coming.” “That was one time.” “And it was awful the one time.” “You had three servings.” “Because I was hungry, not because quinoa deserves to be in my mouth, unlike other things.” Shane rolled his eyes. Anya huffed dramatically when no more blueberries appeared. “Oh, now she suffers.” Ilya murmured sympathetically, crouching to scratch behind her ears. “Cruel father deprives tiny princess.” “She’s getting to big.” “She is sturdy.” “She’s twelve pounds.” “Is all muscle. Isn't it малышка.” The oatmeal thickened enough for Shane’s liking. He turned the burner down and reached automatically toward the silverware drawer. The moment he pulled it open, the drawer let out a violent high-pitched shriek. It was sharp and metallic and unbearably loud. The sound ripped through the kitchen. Shane screamed. A full, horrified scream tore out of him as his entire body seized. It was like being burned. If had heard this in public he might have grimaced and bit into his lip way too hard, but he was at home. He could do this. The drawer slammed shut hard enough to rattle the cabinets. “Oh, fuck.” Ilya blurted. Shane had already stumbled backward, hands flying over his ears. His breathing turned ragged instantly, face drained white beneath the freckles scattered across his nose. “Shanya—” “Nope.” His voice cracked harshly. “Nope nope nope.”

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    AO3:
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  11. “Yay!” Ilya giggles and throws his head back, settling back into the pillows. He smiles dreamily at Shane. “I’m glad I didn’t kill myself.”
    Shane freezes and Scott stiffens. His words come out slowly, horrified by what he’s just heard. Maybe it was a fluke or an offhanded dead joke. “What did you say?”

    OR

    Ilya suffers a concussion and while high on pain medication, he accidentally reveals his attempt the previous summer.

    Language:
    English
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    3,230
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #85480911
  12. Lily Hollander
    @hollalily81

    It has been 28 days 17 hours and 35 minutes since I last kissed @ShaneHollanderHockeyPlayer

    --

    My take on Ilya having a Boston Lily twit account

    Language:
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    Words:
    3,338
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #85483026
  13. David Hollander doesn't walk in on them at the cottage. Instead Ilya gets a phone call that his brother has died and his niece is an orphan in need of his care. Ilya and Shane have to make a new plan to make space in their lives for a toddler.

    Shane’s shoulders are shaking like he wants to be pacing or screaming or both but he’s holding himself in place on willpower alone, “You can’t risk being deported, not with a kid, not for any reason. And maybe it’ll be good for you, I mean you’ll need help, right? And she’ll help you? And if they ever suspected, I mean a wife, that’s good, right? Everyone thinks you’re straight anyways –”
    “Stop.” Ilya doesn’t mean to sound so loud, so angry, but he’s been through too much in the last twenty minutes to modulate, especially in English, “We talked about this. We had a plan. I would not marry Svetlana.” Because I want to marry you, says the little secret voice inside of him that’s only recently gotten permission to be loud in his head.
    Shane huffs, adorably annoyed, “Ilya, marry Svetlana. For your niece. You might not be in love with her, but you do love her, don’t you?”
    “I –” Ilya swallows thickly, “I do, but –”

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    Files:
    2 versions
    AO3:
    #83928616
  14. [Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov sit on director’s chairs in a white sound studio. They are both wearing Ottawa Centaurs jerseys, and Ilya smiles warmly at Shane as a makeup artist places a small bit of powder across his cheeks while a producer hands them both a practice board.]

    Shane: So, these are just internet searches people do of us?

    Producer: Yes! The most popular ones, and you just answer or comment on them. There’s one board for you, one for Ilya, and then one of the two of you combined. 

    Shane: Sounds harmless enough. 

    Ilya: You do not spend much time on the internet if you think this sounds harmless. 

    Producer: Would you like to practice taking the tape off? 

    [They both nod, and she hands each of them a board. Shane politely and carefully rips off the top piece of tape, focusing on pulling it straight off without ripping it. During the time it takes Shane to take off one piece, Ilya rips off four, crumpling up the tape and throwing it in the air like confetti. A piece hits Shane’s head, and he looks at his husband, slightly startled, while Ilya beams back happily.]

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    AO3:
    #85479656
  15. Ilya would have been more peeved at how crowded the place was, if not for the sight before him. He leaned on the thick black matted flooring of the boxing ring, half hiding his face in the hopes no one would clock the hungry look on his face as a shirtless Ryan Price and extremely fit-looking Shane Hollander taped down their gloves. Or: Do we need an excuse to punch Dallas Kent in the face? Companion piece to There have been threats and If you're afraid of wolves. August 2016.

    Language:
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    Files:
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    AO3:
    #85454021
  16. There’s a bulletin in the newspaper delivered to the cottage on Sunday morning, a brief warning to locals and tourists alike. Try not to go hiking alone. If you do, be sure to let someone know where you are and when you’ll be back. You never know what could befall you—who you could meet—in the woods! It’s a shame Shane doesn’t read the paper before slipping out in the predawn morning, Ilya fast asleep beside him.

    Language:
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    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #82478096
  17. People seemed to assume Shane's pregnant stomach was free real estate. Public property. Free to touch and judge. Good thing he had a very understanding husband he could pour his heart to. Featuring Anya who already loves their unborn baby.

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    AO3:
    #85435051
  18. Haley
    Hi Shane! Just messaging about our heater again. Do you think we could get it fixed today?
    Shane
    So sorry for the late reply, Haley! I’m at the Olympics and my time zones are all messed up. Messaged my HVAC guy and he’ll be there in the morning.

    Haley
    screenshot.jpg
    Wtf?
    Katie
    Is this guy fr???

    Or: the trials and tribulations of renting from Shane Hollander.

    Language:
    English
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    Chapters:
    5/5
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #82962906
  19. In Monopoly, a "get out of jail free" card is a card that, as the name implies, lets the player get out of jail without paying for it. When you have that card, you don't have to play it immediately. You just hold onto it in case it's ever needed.

    The Montreal Metros had a rule in their contracts nobody really followed. It was stupid so everyone broke it, and it was just kind of an open secret. They'd never FIRE you for breaking it, so who cared?

    Well, a Shane Hollander who knew he was already doing something a lot worse that he couldn't legally be fired for and didn't want to give them a different excuse. That's who cared.

    Or: A post-game press conference gets very honest in a way that reflects a hell of a lot worse on his old team than it does on Shane.

    Language:
    English
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    Files:
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    AO3:
    #85467661
  20. At an impromptu meeting with MHL Commissioner Roger Crowell, Shane Hollander, Jean-Jacques Boiziau, Carter Vaughn and Zane Boodram finds out that the league has been surveilling them under the guise of ‘due diligence.’ Real answer? The league was surveilling their queer and players of colors – hoping to find a way to incriminate them.
    Shane Hollander decides to sue the league.
    ________
    The socmed fic that accompanies Mec, j’ai besoin and Between I and She.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,527
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Files:
    1
    AO3:
    #85472286
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