61 – 75 of 75 Works in References to Depression
- References to Depression ×
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To Be Remembered, Is To Be Loved by BrokenColors
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-01
Shane Hollander forgets his marriage. Ilya Rozanov doesn’t forget how to love him. As Shane recovers from a concussion that fractures his memories, the life they built together resurfaces in quieter ways. Through routine, touch, shared space, and an intimacy that refuses to disappear. Love, it turns out, doesn’t always need memory. Sometimes, it just needs time. -------- tl;dr - Hollanov's Amnesia AU in which Shane's last memory is July 2010, a.k.a the first time they hooked up in Toronto after shooting the commercial. Problem is, it is 2022, and they have been married for almost a year, but Shane cannot remember the past 12 years of his life with Ilya.
- Part 1 of To Be or Not To Be
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 13,876
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76882061
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Til They Retire Your Number by technicallyverycowboy
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-12-31
They lapse back into a comfortable silence. Shane looks at Ilya as he is and thinks about Ilya as he was at seventeen, smoking in the back of a Saskatchewan parking lot. The image is almost unbearably tender for Shane, where his own seventeen year old thrill at seeing Ilya Rozanov meets all the things Shane knows about that lonely boy now. Shane thinks: Do you love number 81 more than you love this man? "Hey," Ilya says, brushing his knuckles over Shane's cheek. "Whatever I do, I will be there when you come home." Ilya decides to retire. Shane is very normal about it.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 17,008
- Chapters:
- 5/5
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #76423186
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Pain Has a Memory by orphan_account
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-12-30
After a sudden, crippling migraine causes Shane to collapse at home, Ilya returns to find him unconscious and surrounded by scattered pills, spurred by Anya’s urgent warnings. The scene plunges Ilya into old fears as paramedics rush Shane to the hospital. With Yuna and David at their side, Shane slowly regains consciousness to help the family weave comfort, reassurance, and unspoken love through the quiet moments between fear and recovery.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,866
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76714731
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i'm not how you hoped by sunsetcherry
Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
2025-12-30
"And the Montreal Voyagers take home the cup once again! Never in the history has the same team taken the cup home back to back. Congratulations Voyagers." Shane shut off his phone as he closed his eyes. He head led them to victory, twice. He had been captain. He had cared for his teammates, people he saw as brothers. The hard work had forged unbreakable bonds, or at least bonds he thought were unbreakable. He was wrong. or Shane Hollander is working through his feelings of being shunned by the Montreal Voyagers.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,778
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76683086
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Once More to See You by fuckboy_genius
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-12-30
Ilya has a nightmare.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,280
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76735281
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Before Ilya can bite out a teasing remark at his state, Hollander starts to speak in a jumble of words that seem like they’ve been on the verge of spilling out for a long time. “Don't marry her, Ilya." Hollander says desperately, now using the hold they had on each other for balance just a moment ago, to keep Ilya from running away. “Please, don’t marry her.” “Hollander?” Ilya says the name dumbly, at a loss for how to answer. -- Marrying Svetlana seems like the obvious solution to the growing pile of problems in Ilya's life. It's not like Hollander would care since he's dating one of the biggest movie stars in the world. Right?
- Part 1 of Heated Rivalry
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,303
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76719536
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Teeth don't lie by Fangirl_In_Gray
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-12-24
Do you ever feel depressed? Ilya paused again. Yes, but why would a dentist need to know that? What if this dentist told the rest of the team medical staff, and they benched him or took away his captaincy because he was depressed? He checked no. Ilya gets a dental cleaning and has to confront the fact that maybe he is not managing his depression as well as he thinks.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,119
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76355401
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Shane blinks his eyes open to find Ilya hovering above him. “Let me make you a burger for dinner.” “Ilya,” he smiles. Translation: Diet. “I will make you bird burger, the way you like it. Bean patty. Fake bread bun.” “You think they have my bean burgers and weird bread at this thing?” Shane had been expecting to just survive on veggie platters until they got home. Ilya scoffs like he said something stupid. “Yes, Hollander, I told Dykstra to order them last week.” Shane and Ilya attend the 2019 Dykstra-Pike collaborative Canada Day cottage party.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 13,081
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76358891
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Yuna and David reach out to Ilya in the aftermath of the Centaurs' emergency landing.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,592
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76058681
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“I said I’m fine.” “You don’t sound fine.” “Why does it matter how I sound?” Ilya spins back around, frustration spilling over. “Why is there always something? Tone, face, body language. Maybe I’m just fucking tired, Shane. Maybe I don’t have the energy to be ‘okay’ correctly.” Shane swallows. “I’m not asking you to be okay.” “It feels like it,” Ilya scoffs. “It feels like if I don’t say the right words, if I don’t say them the right way, you’ll keep pushing until you get something out of me.” — Ilya’s mother’s birthday sends Ilya down a rough episode, in which Shane tries understanding him.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,027
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #75839256
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Ilya gets a surprise.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,433
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #75754566
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taste of control by beetlesandstars, kryptonian
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-12-11
“So,” Ilya starts, drumming his fingers on his knees. “You want tuna melt when we get home?” “What?” Shane says, distracted. “We just had dinner.” “Yes,” Ilya says. “But you had children’s portion.” Shane sends him an incredulous look. “I had two servings.” “Of baby food.” “Ilya.” “Shane.” Shane sighs. “Can we not do this? Please.” Unfortunately for Shane, they must do this. Or: Shane's restrictive eating versus Hayden Pike and Ilya Rozanov.
- Part 1 of cjo + hr
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,262
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 3 versions
- AO3:
- #75597311
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I Will Hold You Up, I'll Be Right Beside You by lucianowriter
Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-12-08
Ilya has a series of really bad days, so Shane plans an elaborate surprise to cheer him up.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,178
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #75451121
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you haven't come this far to fall off the earth by canadianwolfbird
Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-11-17
It’s not that Ilya wants the darkness to win; it’s just that sometimes he lets it.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,039
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #74294536
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Ilya stumbles upon Hayden's new profile picture on instagram, one with his wife and four kids, and he tries to not feel anything about it. Set in 2019 and 2025
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,721
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #67655841
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