161 – 177 of 177 Works in Internalized Homophobia
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Opposites Attract by attackattackattack
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-12-30
After his accident, Shane doesn’t remember Ilya Rozanov. Why does his rival visit him in the hospital? And who is this “Lily” in his phone? or an alternate story where shane forgets ilya but ilya makes shane remember this is canon compliant because it fits right after the accident and before the cottage
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,219
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76660991
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Loud and Proud (and Anxious) by BluishFrog
Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
2025-12-30
Shane Hollander loves his new life. A life where he gets to go home with Ilya every day, where he gets to tell his friends and his team about the stupidly romantic things Ilya does without even noticing, where he gets to call Ilya his husband and no one thinks it’s a joke. Sharing that love with the world? That’s where it gets a little more complicated. Because even if Shane wants to loudly declare just how fucking incredible it is to love Ilya Rozanov— and be loved by him in return—sharing even the smallest detail of their private life with a wider audience makes him feel about the same as being slammed headfirst into the stands. Or: Shane might have left the closet behind him, but it takes a while before the closet stops haunting him.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 12,042
- Chapters:
- 5/5
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76220281
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the come up, the blow up by subcorax
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-12-29
Scott’s not really surprised to spot Ilya Rozanov backstage, getting lightly swarmed by a crowd of sound techs and hair and makeup crew. Even on the rare year that neither of them were getting any awards, the League always tried to get either him or Hollander, and preferably both, presenting something. And since Hollander was still out for the count and recovering up in Ottawa, that left Rozanov, standing awkwardly while a harried-looking woman straightened his bow-tie. Or: Scott Hunter's not really sure what's happening right now.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,911
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #76635861
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5 times Shane Hollander makes a conscious effort to publicly display his affection for Ilya Rozanov, and 1 time he doesn't need to think so hard about it.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 8,139
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76604681
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home is just a room full of my safest sounds by catknives
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-12-27
“Is not like we don’t know how to be quiet, we hooked up in hotels for over a decade.” “It’s not about being quiet, Ilya. No matter what we do, they’re going to assume we’re in there having sex.” “Yeah, well, we probably will be having sex.” Ilya didn’t really understand the issue. Was he supposed to pretend he and his husband were celibate? Half the guys on the team made jokes about post-game sex with their partners. No one ever batted an eye with them. “Quiet sex, though.” Shane hadn’t disagreed, but apparently it wasn’t a helpful distinction. Shane insists he and Ilya sleep in separate hotel rooms for away games. Neither of them handle it very well.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,030
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76551191
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Confidence, Poor Judgment, and a Death Wish by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-12-27
Troy Barrett comes to Ottawa wanting stability. He tells himself he wants the team, the routine, the structure, the safety of fitting in without needing too much from anyone. This is his clean start, and he needs to do whatever it takes to keep it.
What he finds instead is Shane Hollander, amazing perfect Shane Hollander, and the uncomfortable realisation that the thing he’s been trying hardest not to want might be the only thing that actually feels like what he needs.
As lines blur and tempers rise, Troy learns the hard way that wanting to belong can turn into wanting to keep, and that some things aren’t up for negotiation, especially when there’s a Russian captain who’s already decided what’s not on offer.
or
“Hey, Ilya?” Troy asks, already regretting it. “I was actually going to ask you about someone.”
The moment he says Shane Hollander’s name, the locker room goes quiet, and Troy knows he’s crossed a line he didn’t fully understand.
Or
Troy’s POV of the events best called ‘Ilya’s worst nightmare’
- Part 1 of Freckles and Other Versions Of The Truth
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 32,228
- Chapters:
- 7/7
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #76076481
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something you can fix by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-12-27
Maybe if the video ended there, Shane thought, it would be okay. Okayish. Still incriminating. Still a fucking disaster. Still embarrassing, to have his breakup with this beautiful actress filmed and disseminated on Reddit of all fucking places, but not a nail in his coffin, burying him alive. But the video didn’t end there.
“Can I ask if you’ve ever been with another guy?” she had to ask.
And he, tears visible in his eyes, had to nod.
Just once. Just a single nod.
Why did he have to nod?
“Have you ever told anyone that before?” He shook his head. “Was it different? With a guy?”
“Of course.”
Of course.
“Was it better?”
“Yes.”
+++
Shane’s conversation with Rose is secretly recorded. Months later, after the All-Star game and Ilya’s confession in Russian, the video gets leaked online. Shane is outed to the world while Ilya is in Russia, and must now finish the 2016-2017 season with the entire world in on his secret.
- Part 1 of something you can fix
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 26,824
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 8 versions
- AO3:
- #76495636
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Shane dropped his gaze. “You’re really going to make me ask?” “Yes,” Ilya said. “You ask, maybe you get. So, ask.” “Okay,” Shane said. “I want you to fuck me.” Ilya started to laugh. “Don’t—this isn’t a fucking joke, alright?” Shane snapped. “Shut up. I want it to be different. Or, no—the same, but more. I want you to just make me fucking take it. Shit. I don’t know how to ask you for this.” “No, no, is good start so far,” Ilya said. “Go back to the part where I get to make you fucking take it. That’s good. Tell me more.”
- Part 1 of missing scenes
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 12,030
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #76021551
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He shouldn’t even be entertaining this. After exchanging such heated gazes in the shower, Shane is pretty certain he knows what Rozanov wants by coming to his room. And it’s absolutely not something either of them should want. It’s not something Shane should want. Another Alpha is not something Shane should want. Ilya and Shane's first time reimagined through Omegaverse
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,899
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #76365306
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Ilya knows there is a thing about himself he has to always keep hidden in the deepest recesses of his body, behind his molars and in his core. He thinks Shane Hollander might be the same, except the thing about him he cannot hide. Ilya Rozanov is the biggest hockey talent of his generation. So is Shane Hollander. But over the years Ilya notices that the vicious media and the clamouring fans and some of his more foul-mouthed teammates treat Hollander differently than any other hockey player.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 12,438
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #76278971
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Got a little battered and bruised
From standing tall and speaking truth
As if my life depends on it
But being right don't pay the rent-
Being the first openly gay hockey player has its rough days. When they come, remember what's important.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 952
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76202896
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I'm Reading Your Lips (You're Speaking My Language) by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-12-22
Rozanov cocked his head. “You speak Russian? Or just the curse words?”
“Yes, I speak Russian,” he snapped, defensive and angry. He knew that it had been a mistake to even try to be friendly with Rozanov. “Why? Do I not look Russian to you?” He scoffed.
“No, not really,” Rozanov said. Some of his teammates laughed, although they mostly looked surprised that Shane was speaking to them at all. Rozanov didn’t laugh, though. “Are you Russian?”
“Go fuck yourself.”
+++
Despite an inauspicious start, when Russia’s Ilya Rozanov learns that Canada’s Shane Hollander is fluent in Russian at their first World Junior Championships tournament, it changes everything and sets them on a different course. Instead of being branded as rivals from the very beginning, Ilya and Shane start off as friends.
And, after all, a little friendly rivalry never hurt anyone, did it?
- Part 1 of Competition is Better With a Friend
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 30,455
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Files:
- 6 versions
- AO3:
- #76003496
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Shane raised his head to look Ilya in the eye, bright with unshed tears and said, “I think I’m gay.” And Ilya’s first thought is yeah, no shit except the way Shane said it – like it was breaking him completely to admit it out loud. Shit. --- OR: Ilya leaves the club alone but gets a call from Shane in crisis. Shane sleeps with Rose after seeing Ilya at the club and realizes he might be gay. Even though they're not on speaking terms, the only one he has to talk to about it is Ilya.
- Part 6 of Episode Aftercare
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,719
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #76004986
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he’ll be the best you ever had (if you let him) by vissers
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-12-16
"You say you don’t want this. You say you can't. And still the shirt." Shane is quick to protest, not giving himself a second to even consider any alternative. "Look, I don't know what you're trying to prove here but—" "Give it back," Ilya instructs, his voice steady and low. "Tell me I am nothing to you, and I let you go." It's self-sabotage. Textbook fucking definition. Maybe it's what he needs to give up on this. He just needs to hear Shane say it, that's all. —— Shane freaks out. Ilya doesn't want him to leave without figuring out exactly how Shane feels about him. (aka a post tuna melt scene rewrite where communication isn’t a foreign concept to them)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,630
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #75878981
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Ilya rubbed his thumb across Shane’s hand. “Thank you for sharing that with me. I know it was not easy.” Shane scoffed, “No shit.” Ilya flicked at him playfully. “Shut up. I am trying to be comforting.” Shane peeked at Ilya from under his arm just to glare at him. Shane was glad Ilya wasn’t being careful with him or anything–that would have just made him feel worse. Ilya was just being Ilya, and Shane needed that. Or, Shane Hollander has OCD. It's frustrating, scary, and difficult, but Ilya is there for him every step of the way.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,504
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #75484206
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how u remind me by vividblossom (dirtymudblood)
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-12-08
After an injury takes Shane's memory, Ilya is left as the only one who remembers.
- Part 1 of how could i forget u?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 12,643
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #75462571
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- Language:
- en
- Words:
- Chapters:
- ?/?
- Files:
- 1
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