1 – 13 of 13 Works in Talking About Feelings

  • Talking About Feelings ×
  1. moon chasers by

    Heated Rivalry (TV)
    • E
    • ✓

    2026-08-21

    One side of his brain is going: this is insane, don't do this, just stay in this room, what can he do? Whether you like it or not, he's hurt you, and chances are you've hurt him too, because you can't read a situation for shit, so what are we trying to do here? Get some fucking sleep instead.

    The other side of his brain is going: He's hurt you, and you've probably hurt him too, and what if this is your only chance to talk about it? What if Paris makes the difference?

    Five months after Sochi, Shane's set to play a charity hockey game in Paris. So is Ilya.

    They run into each other in the lobby of their hotel the night before. Twelve hours stretch out in front of them, and Ilya suggests something different: no phones, no expectations, no past, no hockey. Just the city, and whatever they can be when nobody else is watching.

    It's obviously a terrible idea, but Shane says yes, anyway.

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  2. "So you’ve been in love since…" They'd both been quick to deny Yuna Hollander's stunned question and if the 'just' of their answer hadn't been entirely true, at least not for Ilya, then no one needed to know that right? Once they’re back at the cottage Ilya forgets all about that question but unfortunately Shane Hollander, his newly coined "boyfriend" has a mind that thinks too much and a mouth that while good for many things is unfortunately also good at asking questions - questions like "when?" It’s a question he’s rather not answer, not that he doesn't know the answer he does, he just doesn't particularly want to admit it out loud but for Shane, for them and their future together perhaps he can. Suddenly all Iyla can see are Shane's eyes; so full of feelings, his lashes dusted with the tears he won't ever let fall and Ilya's heart flutters in a way that he's become very familiar with, he understands the question now and he knows the answer. He's known that answer for a very long time. And now Shane wants to know too.

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  3. “I am not scared,” he lies. Each word is soft but crisply enunciated so Shane can't miss them. “Do you want me scared?”

    “Obviously not,” Shane snaps at him. He gestures toward Ilya's waist, toward the slim outline of what he had clocked as a folding knife the second Ilya started carrying it, and adds, “but I know you're not just ‘happy to see me.’ I want the truth, I need to hear that-” he chokes over his words, his lips moving too quickly for his brain to keep up. “Please, be honest with me, for once.”

    For a long, silent moment, Ilya just stares at him, grinding his teeth behind a placid expression as if Shane can't tell. 

    -

    Shane and Ilya talk about their feelings, kind of.

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  4. “Aren't you gonna- you don't have questions? You're just…” Shane trails off when Ilya kisses the inside of his knee. “...fine with it?”

    “I have many questions,” Ilya drawls, cheek still pressed into Shane's leg. “I am fine? Mm, probably.” He quirks his lips in a smile that doesn't reach his eyes. “I will know for sure after we talk.”

    When Shane starts to sit up, Ilya lowers his legs onto the mattress and slinks up beside him. He hasn't taken off his sneakers yet. “I'm not gonna kill you, or anything, if you're worried.”

    “Comforting,” Ilya rumbles.

    -

    Or, Ilya finds out Shane's pre-game ritual involves murder.

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  5. Ten minutes into the drive back to his cottage, Shane carefully signals and pulls over onto the shoulder of the empty road, then slumps over with his forehead on the wheel.

    • Part 3 of
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  6. He meant to have this conversation months ago, if he’s honest.

    Truly, he’d planned on reaching out. Had tweaked his usual Instagram message, the one that both offers condolences and community. Scott didn’t figure that Rozanov would respond particularly well to that level of sincerity, especially given the lack of details around his family life – even after his father’s death had been announced by the media. Instead, he’d decided to throw in a light chirp and remove some of the apologies as a middle ground solution.
    ________________

    Or, Scott planned to reach out to Rozanov over the summer about his father. But now -- at the Opening Banquet for the 2017-2018 NHL Season -- is as good of a time as any.

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  7. Going to the club is the last thing Shane wants to do. But indulging what he wants is what got him here in the first place, and now he has to do his penance. -- This time, Shane does not leave with Rose.

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  8. Ilya is wary of Shane’s dad, having a bad track record with fathers. David gives him some much needed reassurance. They hug it out.

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  9. At this point Ilya is utterly besotted. His deranged boyfriend saw him being good at babysitting, and immediately proceeded to overthink it until he developed a pregnancy wish. God, Ilya knew he was securing himself a real weirdo, but this is a whole other level of insane. And fuck how much he loves this man for it. “I wish I could get pregnant.” The sentence hangs there, in the soft dim light of their bedroom, for a long moment. Ilya was close to falling asleep, he needs time to register the words and translate them. And then some more time to process their meaning. It’s not unusual for Shane to do this. Waking him up at some ungodly hour to tell him what crazy, beautiful idea his unhinged brain had just concocted. It’s endearing – one among the many reasons Ilya loves him so much. Except this time ‘endearing’ is not the first term that crosses Ilya’s mind. To be fair, right now there’s very little going on in his mind. His cock has taken that sentence very seriously, though. He rolls over to face Shane – yes, he was being the little spoon, he likes to be held, okay? “Hollander, if you want me so bad to fill you up you just have to ask.” he teases him, a smirk pulling at his lips. Shane huffs at him, a cute blush spreading over his cheeks. “I mean it.” “Mh-mh.” Ilya nods, crawling over him and caging him in his arms, “You sure do. Tell me more.” “Ilya…” Shane scolds him, weakly shoving at his shoulders. He’s annoyed – not enough to actually stop him though. Ilya grinds his hips to Shane’s, slotting their half-hard cocks together. “Shane?” he murmurs over his neck, sucking and nipping at the skin. “I–” an amused sigh, “It’s not like… a kink or something…” “Okay.” Ilya doesn’t really give a fuck about what it is. It’s hot as hell and he wants to make the most of it. “Ilya…” Shane sighs again, leaning more on exasperated this time, “I mean it.” Later, Ilya will mentally congratulate himself for being strong enough and stop to actually listen to him. Because right now he just wants to bury himself into Shane. But no, of course his anxiety fueled boyfriend wants to talk about it. Ilya thinks it would be way more fun to put the whole thing in action, but okay. He guesses he has to be patient and wait. He rolls again, pulling at him so they can lay on their side and look at each other. “You mean it.” he repeats, more to himself than to him, “You want to get pregnant.” Shane scoffs, as if Ilya just said something dumb, and not merely rephrased his own words. “I wish I could have your baby.” he points out, all serious. Ilya searches his face for a moment, looking for any clue to help him through this, but he finds none. Now he’s damn confused. See, Ilya is a down-to-earth man, and sex is no exception. He doesn’t really get kinks, but he enjoys the fucking only if his lover is enjoying it in the first place, so he always goes with whatever they want for the other’s sake. That’s why he’s good at it. He might as well admit that that’s his peculiar kink: please his partner. But apparently, now his boyfriend is not talking kinky. He said he means it – twice – and Ilya doesn't understand. They are two men, it can’t happen. Ilya can’t make it happen. He can fake it, if that’s Shane’s fantasy, acting it out as best as he can. But he can’t actually knock Shane up. Ilya can’t fulfill his wish, and this whole talk is only puzzling and frustrating for him. He must wear his confusion all over his face, because now Shane is leaning over to kiss him gently. “Hey… it’s okay. I’m just a bit sad that we can't have what everyone can.” Ilya’s eyebrows shoot up – that’s a huge generalization. And that more than anything else puts everything Shane is saying into the right spotlight. He usually talks with his brain, but now he’s talking with his heart – which is so rare. Yes, Ilya already had the chance to witness his boyfriend truly going vulnerable like this, but not so often. They are sincere with each other now, the time for walls between them is gone, but Shane still has a hard time putting his emotions into words. Not because he doesn't want to, but rather because he's still figuring out how. You can bet whenever it happens it’s just priceless. So now Ilya forces himself to put aside his confusion – and put down his cock – to give his boyfriend his complete attention. “It's just… this isn’t fair.” Shane shrugs, a little crease between his eyebrows. Ilya reaches there with a hand, the thumb massaging away the crease. “There are other ways.” Shane closes his eyes, relaxing under his touch. “Mmh… I know.” he grumbles, “Just wished we could do it the easy way.” “Easy? Pregnant you would be a pain in the ass.” he jokes, hoping to lighten up the mood a bit.

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  10. Something New by

    Heated Rivalry (TV)
    • M
    • ?
    • ✓

    2026-01-12

    “It was in 2013. The first time, we were in that stupid apartment of yours in Montreal. So many pillows, you hired someone to decorate. I knew it was your first time, like that, with anybody. I wanted to make it good for you so badly. I’d thought a lot about it. I’d planned for it, like I never would have for anybody else I’ve been with. I didn’t expect— I didn’t realize how right it would be. I wanted to stay, I wanted to stay in that bed forever just to hold you.” “Holy shit,” Shane says. Ilya sighs, glares at him. “You have got to stop saying that in response to my romantic declarations. Is bad for my nerves.”

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  11. “You want me to get you pregnant Hollander?” Shane moved to straddle Ilya whose mischievous grin was shadowed by his face peering down at him. “Unless you have discovered a way to make that medically possible, and plan on taking a hiatus from hockey to be a stay-at-home dad, we’ll have to figure our another arrangement.” *********** Ilya and Shane talk about having kids after he meets his parents and they have super slutty sex.

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  12. “For our next session, I’d like you to list all the reasons why you’re so resistant to the idea of taking antidepressants.” Ilya sometimes resents that therapy is so much work. And that it has the audacity to actually help. Now to talk to Shane about the sex thing.

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  13. “So, how do you feel about Chicken Parmesan?” Of all the things Ilya could have guessed David Hollander would say, that was not one of them. Maybe “Sorry for accidentally interrupting a beautiful moment with your boyfriend and then immediately leaving. That was probably stressful.” Or the opposite end, “Why do you think you're worthy of my perfect son after publicly whoring around for years?” Both scenarios were unlikely, he knew, but the chicken parmesan really came out of nowhere. Ilya cleared his throat and tried not to fidget with his crucifix. “Is good.” -------------------------------------------------------- Or, the missing convo between Ilya Rozanov and David Hollander

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