401 – 420 of 455 Works in Humor
- Humor ×
-
hayden calls shane again while he's at the cottage. ilya is fed up that their romantic getaway is getting interrupted again so he answers the call.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,185
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76536961
-
“Shane Hollander designated Ilya Rozanov as an emergency contact several years ago due to logistical concerns related to frequent travel and family availability. There is nothing unusual about this arrangement…”
Comments
→ vibin @blueeyed789: So Hayden Pike is chopped liver thenWhen Shane Hollander is hurt on the ice and Ilya Rozanov is called out in the middle of the game to be with him, Hayden Pike and the internet spiral. Secret marriage. Bad PR. A nurse with an NDA. Hockey Twitter never stood a chance.
- Part 1 of my hollanov socmed fics
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,777
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76490261
-
Hayden knows what he saw. Clear as day, right there in the middle of Shane’s text thread with Lily.
A dick pic.
Hayden keeps mindlessly scrolling Instagram—a pantomime of paying attention, not really taking in anything that’s passing across his screen. Mind racing as a series of realizations wash over him.
Christ, no wonder Shane was so cagey about Lily. No wonder he didn’t want to introduce her to the guys.
Hayden would like to believe that everyone would be chill with it, but he could think of at least five guys off the top of his head that would a hundred percent take issue with Shane dating a trans woman. He can imagine, far too easily, the kind of slurs that would get thrown around the locker room if anyone ever found out. Towards Lily, sure, but towards Shane too—because Shane had to be gay, if his girlfriend had a dick, right?
Or, Hayden finds out something that he was never supposed to, and decides that the only thing he can do is show his best friend that he can be the best ally ever, if he just gives him the chance.- Part 1 of The Lily Files
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,167
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #76542001
-
Unscripted Emotions by minniekitten
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-12-26
Shane and Ilya are asked to an ad campaign together for CCM, Shane deals with some emotion.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,630
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76480886
-
Lily: hollander this is a broken shack in the middle of the woods Jane: Listen. I think I got scammed. Lily: you THINK? in order to get some more privacy, shane looks into other cottage ideas.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,097
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76440236
-
Shane Hollander's Unexpected Nurse by Anonymous
Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
2025-12-26
When Shane falls ill and isn't answering his phone, Hayden and JJ decide to be responsible teammates and go check on him. They find a very sick Shane, and a very surprising caretaker.
Set after book 1, but while Ilya is still playing for Boston.
- Part 1 of hayden's neverending suffering
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,387
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76473581
-
Thought I had it right, once, twice (but I did not) by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-12-26
About three minutes ago Shane had smacked his phone down on the bed with too much force. It had tumbled off, landing screen up next to Hayden’s bed. A picture of Ilya Rozanov’s dick taking up half of the screen. Shane had to watch in horror how his best friend picked up the phone, barely glanced at it and then almost dropped it after a second look.
So he had blurted out the first excuse that came to mind, which was ‘I think I’m gay but I’m not sure’. That had made Hayden disregard the picture completely. Instead of asking whose dick it was, he had told Shane to kiss him.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,725
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76436051
-
All I Do is Stay Winning by Ragazza_Guasto
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-12-25
“Can you believe it? How the hell did he end up bagging her?” Ilya stared, brain not comprehending what his body already seemed to, that Hollander was dating- “Rose fuckin’ Landry! How does the lamest guy in the League-” He knew that smile. He thought it was for him, just for him. But it wasn't. “No,” he whispered. His stomach spasmed. “You good, Roz?” Why would he- How could he- They were holding hands… “Rozanov? What the fuck?” He jumped up from the table and stumbled for the front door, just barely making it through before the first mass of petals came up. He heaved as he ran, trying desperately to get away from the pavement, somewhere he could hide what was happening. Unfortunately, his teammates had followed, because of course they would. He saw a photo of Shane Hollander holding hands with a movie star and promptly threw up. Who wouldn't be curious?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,144
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76385356
-
After Ilya leaves Shane in the hospital, Shane gets lonely and texts Hayden to get Ilya back Shane: Hes soooooo hot Hayden: ? Hayden: What? Hayden: Are you okay? Shane: im goooooood Hayden: What was the prognosis, how bad are you hurt? Will you be able to play next week or no? Shane: concussed and broken collarbone out for the rest of the season Hayden: Shit. Should you be on your phone right now? Don’t they tell you not to look at screens if you’ve got a concussion Shane: nuh uh im on the goooood stuff Hayden: They’ve got you on pain meds? No pain? Shane: uh huh, nothing Hayden: That’s good, I’m glad you’re not feeling it right now. Sucks that you’re out for the play offs but your health is more important mate Shane: yeh Hayden: I tell you what, if I see fuckin Marlow again I’m ruining his face. I didn’t get enough of a chance on the ice so that fucker got off easy Shane: was accident Ilya told me and he doesnt lie Hayden: Ilya? As in Rozanov? Shane: uh huh. He said Marlow did not mean to hurt me and he feels reaaaal bad Hayden: When did you talk to Rozanov? Shane: he was here Shane: he held my hand Shane: his hands are so soft. like fluffy clod Shane: clud Shane: cloud Hayden: Damn, you must be pretty high right now Shane: where is Ilya he needs to come back Hayden: Um, Shane, I think you’re imagining things. Or maybe whatever you’re on right now has got you a bit confused Shane: nuh uh Shane: he came to see me Shane: but told me to shhh cos it’s a secret Shane: so shhh it’s a secret Hayden: What’s a secret? That he visited you? Shane: hes gonna come to my cottage Shane: we will have a whole two weeks together can you believe that Hayden: Um… Shane: we get to fuck everywhere Shane: on the bed Shane: on the kitchen counter Shane: on the couch Shane: by the lake Hayden: Dude, what’re you talking about right now? Shane: Ilya. Hes soooooooo hot Hayden: Um, I just want to preface this by saying I love you mate and I support you if um, you know, you’re gay but I think you’re talking a bit of nonsense right now. You hate Rozanov, remember Shane: nope hes sexy Shane: sexy Russian accent Shane: and aww you love and support me yay Shane: im like super gayyyyy Shane: super super super super super
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,664
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76397541
-
Hayden froze, thoughts screeching to a halt. Getting mad defensive about Lily… Leaving her place early… Coming back in a piss poor mood… Wearing clothes that didn't seem like his… Was Shane having an affair with a Boston WAG????? **** Or, the one where Hayden puts the pieces together and comes to a very wrong conclusion
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,036
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76429956
-
Jane has been added to the conversation. by Anonymous
Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
2025-12-25
a Shane Boston WAGs companion fic to the very wonderful please leave a message.
or: Shane is decidedly not one of the girls.
- Part 1 of team meeting!
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,967
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76114776
-
ring ring ring (yeah it's super important) by gurlsrool
Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
2025-12-25
Shane: omg how did you know im on pain meds? u know everything! Shane: like how I’m gay Rose: Shane, don’t tell people you’re gay right now, okay? Shane: I know I know Shane: he said shhhh Shane: he is so cute Shane: he held my hand :) Or: A look into Shane's texts while high on pain meds.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,498
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #76372611
-
Even Ilya fucking Rozanov was going to know Shane was okay before the girl Shane had been seeing for years. Hayden couldn’t let that happen. So he lifted Shane’s phone again, scrolled through his contacts, and found Lily’s name. The line began to ring. Rozanov stiffened where he stood at the hospital counter, then he pulled out his phone. Weird. or High on pain meds after his injury, Shane entrusts his phone to Hayden to answer his texts and tell everyone he's okay. Hayden realizes that no one else would have called Lily, because no one else knows she even exists.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,948
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 3 versions
- AO3:
- #76348856
-
The Wrong Conclusion by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-12-24
“Um,” Hayden started, and his whole face was flushed red. Shane couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen Hayden look so flustered. “Lily sent you a dick pic.”
or
Hayden sees a dick pic from “Lily” and comes to exactly the wrong conclusion.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 505
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76354466
-
Shane shares his sex playlist with Ilya. Things ensue. Author's Notes: Soooo, guess who's finished watching all five eps of Heated Rivalry in just under two days? (Still, it's quite an achievement that it was not binged in one session XD!) This happens sometime around ep 6 when they're already in Shane's cottage. Jumping ahead for a bit but no spoilers; it's just a lazy, sexy afternoon with the boys as they discuss what music they're into when making love. Links to the mentioned songs are provided. Enjoy and do let us know what you think! ^_~ "Is just background," remarked Ilya with a shrug. He was aware that he sounded too dismissive, judging from the lift of a dark eyebrow and a dry look from Shane. Really? "Music during intimacy can be more than mere background noise, you know," argued Shane as they lounged around in bed for what was supposed to be an easy afternoon of nothing more than book reading and phone scrolling, and perhaps a nap-- quite a luxury. But then they were on vacation, holed up in absolute secrecy in Shane's lakeside cottage somewhere in Eastern Quebec; Ilya had not bothered with the exact location given he was more interested in other, far more absorbing matters once he got to the cottage. As always, he could not quite get enough of Shane Hollander, a fact that ought to be firmly established by now as to not give any pause or thought, yet he found himself amazed and constantly in awe of this person who'd become everything to him. If Scott Hunter's sudden and very public coming out felt like the unclenching of a fist, being here with Shane felt like he could finally let out the breath he did not know he was holding all this time. And if he were like this, how much more did it feel to Shane-- the relief of having finally unburdened himself to his parents. It was as if a load had been lifted from his shoulders yet the process had been overwhelming in the extreme. Now they were crossing over to unknown territory, as boyfriends. Everything about this was heady and scary in equal measure, yet this-- lightheartedly bickering over something as trivial as one's favorite music to have sex to-- brought him back on familiar ground. "I did not say is noise," Ilya pointed out. "All I say is when I fuck, I don't notice anything else except my lover and what I do to him. To you." Shane grinned. "Your laser focus is riveting, yes," he said, still in that dry tone. "But surely you've got some favorite tunes to, you know, get you in the mood, at least." "Uhh, there may be some," Ilya conceded. "Name them." It took a moment for him to come up with one. "That song that goes 'I Wanna Fuck You Like An Animal'," Ilya finally replied, not batting an eyelash as Shane dissolved in chuckles. "You mean Closer," said Shane. "Yeah, I've listened to Nine Inch Nails. That does sound like you." "Club music, something raw, something edgy," he said. "Skillrex. Avicii. It's what I like." He eyed Shane from under his brows. "Whereas you...let me guess." Shane's dark brow remained lifted as he stared at him, urging him to continue. "Adele," Ilya pronounced flatly, with a bit of a grimace. "Angsty. Full of meaning. Will make you cry during fucking." Shane burst out laughing. "No. I mean, I adore Adele and I do have all her records, but no, I wouldn't put her on during those times. Or even when I think about having sex." Ilya watched as Shane's gaze slid away, becoming distracted, as though he were looking deep into himself. This examination of introspectiveness was a new thing for Ilya. He was guilty of calling Shane boring early into their acquaintance when he was like this; he'd thought him moody and antsy, and he still sometimes found it frustrating, if only because Shane seemed so far away from him, but he was learning to read Shane better now, paying attention to his subtle cues and shifting responses. After a short pause, Shane continued, "I've never...I mean, I've never really slept with anyone whom I'd like to put some music on for." "Not even Rose?" Ilya could not help but ask. He was almost embarrassed to admit that Rose Landry, lovely human being that she was, was still very much a thorn on his side whenever he thought of Shane being with her, no matter how brief. Shane gave a small, wry smile. "Well, she put on her music when we were together, of course," he said. Ilya reached out a hand to touch him lightly on the knee. "What about me?" he asked, voice soft. That broke the spell as Shane's gaze slid back to him. "Have you ever played your songs when you thought of me?" "All the time," said Shane softly. "Really?" Ilya shifted so he lay on his side, head propped on one hand. "What times?" Shane shrugged. "Late at night, mostly, in bed with my pods on, thinking about you and what you might be doing. Missing you. Fantasizing about you." "You touched yourself." It was not a question. "Of course," said Shane, his gaze steady as he looked him right back.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,561
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76272816
-
When Ilya accidentally cuffs him and Shane to the bed, there’s only one person in Montreal they can call to get the key.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,585
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76290341
-
“Holy shit. Hollander. You are on Instagram live.” “No, I don’t want to livestream. Hey— can we not focus on this? I miss you. Thanks for coming. It’s been a while. I just want to—” “Do not put me on camera, no— Shane. Hand me the phone.” Comments → @ilyasplants: ilyas here. thers no fucking way. im being pranked → @holllanderrrr: ILYAS THERE WITH HIM??? OH MY GODDD → @hollazia: SHANE HOLLANDER GAY ILYA ROZANOV GAY HOMOSEXUALS
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,023
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76290981
-
Shane's first mistake is making direct eye contact with Ilya. It's like meeting a moose or a bear in the wild, if you look it in the eyes you're signaling a challenge, you might as well have waved a raw steak in front of it. This reaction right here is exactly why they're not allowed to play slapjack on team flights anymore, goddammit. or: Ilya and Shane get a little competitive at the self-checkout
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,163
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76231576
-
Ilya Rozanov walks into traffic by kwiewi
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-12-23
“You know, statistically, I’m much less likely to get hit by a car. I’m not the one that almost walked into traffic a few minutes ago,” Shane says. “That was all you, Rozanov.” He winks. “It is okay. I am very strong. A car could not run me over, I would run the car over with my big muscles,” he pats his bicep. “I am like that big green man. Very strong. Very angry. Massive dick.” Shane flushes. “You’re not the fucking Hulk, man, shut up. You could not fight a car.” - or: the obligatory hollanov meet-ugly
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,215
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76279941
-
Shane deserves a special treat for making it through a tough season. He doesn't know how special the brownies at the Centaurs' party are. aka hospital Shane on the good drugs makes his return
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,871
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76267561