21 – 37 of 37 Works in Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified
- Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified ×
-
Some nights, alone in another anonymous hotel room, Shane scrolls through old photos on his phone. His face rounder. His smile easier. He tries to remember what it felt like not to think about food at all. The memory feels fuzzy, distant, like something that happened to a different version of him. He wonders—briefly, dangerously—if Ilya would notice if he got worse. Not better. Not “healthier.” Worse.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,551
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77544341
-
I’ve Seen Love Die, Way Too Many Times by orphan_account
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-10
Kinda AU where Shane and Ilya are forced to discuss their mental health issues before TLG? Shane goes to surprise visit Ilya a month after he’s moved to Ottawa only to find that his mental health isn’t great. Shane’s isn’t either after a health scare and he’s forced to focus his exercise behaviors with Ilya. (TW ED/discussion of suicidal thoughts).
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,123
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77413696
-
Cumbersome and heavy body by Sweettree
Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
2026-01-08
God, he was having a freak out and it was gonna be a bad one. “I can’t do this I can’t do this. I can’t I can’t. why?! I can’t! I can’t.” Shane was sobbing. He could breathe he couldn’t hear. His whole body was burning. Not like on fire, but it was tingling. Like an energy was trying to escape him from all directions. Like anxiety was trying to seep out of every pore in his skin. Or Shane has a really bad meltdown during a game.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,331
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77324576
-
Ilya dug deeper into the bag and pulled out a sturdy, leather dog collar, dark brown and buckled. Quick as a wink, he held it up, dangling it directly at Shane’s neck. "You make cute puppy. Shchenok Shane."
Shane glared, his face heating up instantly, and slapped Ilya's hand away. "Stop it!"
Ilya advanced closer, his stance casual, yet dominating. "I am serious. Consider this gift. It says, 'I belong to Ilya Rozanov.'... Come on. Put it on. Be my good boy."
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 32,145
- Chapters:
- 5/5
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #74771191
-
Fall 2021 is the first season Shane plays Montreal as an Ottawa Centaur. It doesn't go well.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,929
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77169791
-
If he could just get everything right then he wouldn’t be having these problems, he told himself. If he could stick to his shitty fucking diet which he hated, and his grueling workout routine, and manage his schedule to fit in more brand deals and advertisements, if he could fit in extra hours of practice, and on and on and on. Of course, he thought with spite, this would all be better if he could fucking sleep. Or, Shane is falling apart and Ilya is there to pick up the pieces. “I- I’m sorry, I think this season has just been more stressful than usual,” he had tried to tell Rose Landry as she gathered her clothes from the side of the bed. “Of course,” she’d said and offered him a small smile. They both knew he was full of shit, but one thing wasn’t a lie: this season had been stressful. Shane could feel his control slipping despite his best attempts. No matter how many times he tried to tell himself that he needed to get his shit together his grip on normalcy was loosening. If he could just get everything right then he wouldn’t be having these problems, he told himself. If he could stick to his shitty fucking diet which he hated, and his grueling workout routine, and manage his schedule to fit in more brand deals and advertisements, if he could fit in extra hours of practice, and on and on and on. Of course, he thought with spite, this would all be better if he could fucking sleep. It started about a month ago with one restless night and had spiraled from there. Usually Shane fell into a deep sleep after a long day of practice and workouts and whatever else he was doing but lately he just lay in bed, heart pounding, thoughts racing, and definitely not sleeping. Or, if and when he did manage to fall into a fitful sleep his dreams consisted of his own worst nightmares: losing the cup, everyone finding out about him and Ilya, the flash of cameras in his face, or once even a dream that featured Ilya somewhere in Russia being hurt because of Shane. Always, the dreams concluded that whatever bad things were happening were because of Shane and Shane had a hard time not believing that himself. He’d wake up in empty hotel rooms, a twisted scream escaping his lips, panting and sweaty and alone. Of course people had noticed, Rose had noticed before they broke up and Hayden kept asking him if he was okay at practice and Shane brushed them all off. He was fine, he had to be. So what if he wobbled on his skates and always felt like he was seeing through a thick layer of fog. The only person he really wanted to see, the only person who he could imagine would treat him normally, would probably never want to speak to him again. Not after he left, not after he’d dated Rose fucking Landry. God, he needed to get some fucking sleep, he thought, burying his head in his hands and blocking out the fluorescent lights. “Hey,” Hayden said cautiously, “you alright buddy?” Shane snapped his eyes open, “I’m fine,” he growled. Hayden took a step back, his hands raised in surrender, and Shane couldn’t even bring himself to feel bad for snapping at his best friend. “Okay, I’m gonna go get some snacks, maybe try to get some rest on the plane?” Hayden offered, disappearing into the chaos of the airport. Yeah, Shane thought sarcastically, because it's that easy. On the flight to Florida he determinedly ignored Hayden’s concerned looks in favor of reading one of his hockey books until his best friend fell asleep and Shane looked at him with envy. By the time they landed he was ready to collapse into a hotel bed and hopefully never wake up but he knew both of those things were impossible. When they dropped their bags off in their rooms Shane caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror hanging next to the bed. He looked like shit, he thought, carding a hand through his dark hair in an attempt at looking presentable. Even in his newly styled clothes there was no hiding the dark purple circles under his eyes, the new lines of stress wrinkling his forehead, or how pale he’d gotten. “You look like shit,” was the first thing Ilya Rozanov said to him, coming over to sit next to Shane at the bar. “Fuck off,” Shane responded, even as his hands shook as he raised his glass of ginger ale to his lips. Rozanov hummed, “and you're sure you can play tomorrow? Or I need to score all the goals for both of us?” He said with a smirk. Shane glared at him but he was pretty sure he wasn’t imagining the undercurrent of concern in the Russian’s voice. “I’m fine,” he muttered. “Okay,” he didn’t sound convinced, “see you tomorrow then.” “Y-yeah, see you,” Shane muttered as he hastily stood up and left. Fuck. That night he lay wide awake, staring up at the ceiling above him. Rozanov was here, and he didn’t seem to completely hate him. That had to count for something, right? So why couldn’t he calm the fuck down, why was his heart still racing with anxiety? He blinked at the sleeping figure of Hayden in the bed next to him, passed out without a care in the world. Why couldn’t he just be normal like that? Instead he watched the clock tick ever closer to sunrise until it was six am and time to get up. “You gotta eat something man,” JJ pointed out. They were sitting in the hotel lobby and Shane was picking at an orange, peeling it slowly.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,991
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77103016
-
there's a panic in this house, it's bound to surface by livelyvague
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-02
“Do what?” Shane replies, acting oblivious. He is on the floor of their bedroom, sort of contorting his body in a vague yoga pose that Ilya thinks means he's trying to stretch the pain away. “Do what?” Ilya repeats, completely monotone. “Where you act like you are superhuman! That your body is just a tool, and not a human body that may have issue!” or, shane bursts his appendix after a fight w/ ilya
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,423
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76902666
-
When Two Becomes Three (?) by orphan_account
Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
2026-01-01
Shane Hollander has spent his entire life running from his designation and hoping that people wouldn't find out that he was an omega. Until Ilya Rozanov came along and showed him that it was okay to be an omega in the league. After all, he did win three cups as an omega captain of the Montreal Voyageurs. Now he is the Alternate Captain of the Ottawa Centaurs and has just completed a three-peat alongside his husband and their close friends, and is living as an omega who (thankfully) doesn't have to hide behind scent blockers anymore. He has everything a man could ever want. A loving spouse, a cute dog, two amazing parents, friends who would support you through anything, and a community of supportive allies. He has everything...except for a child. Will he be able to carry a child, or will the toll that hockey has taken on his body catch up to the thirty-four-year-old and prevent him from ever giving Ilya a mini-Hollonov to run around their house?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 26,216
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #75302256
-
cause that's the love that i attract by REDRAGEOUSED
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-12-31
It’s maple-something. Sugar, shaped like leaves and it makes him smile a little. Shane would hate it, tease him about his lack of a “performance diet” like that means anything, and he would lick the taste off of Ilya's lips, which really, is all that’s needed to cement the fact that he needs this candy. It is also so painfully Canadian. Russia at least does bear. They are cooler, objectively. Maple leaves are boring. 5+1 where Ilya rather likes Canadian gas stations. Shane only likes the coffee.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,576
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76784911
-
Gym scene, except Shane overexerts himself after coming 2nd in the draft and makes an attentive Ilya very worried… Ilya always wants to take care of Shane, even when Shane doesn’t know how much he needs it. What will a dinner between the two best hockey rookies do for their rivalry?
- Part 1 of all of me
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,413
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76700706
-
i'm not how you hoped by sunsetcherry
Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
2025-12-30
"And the Montreal Voyagers take home the cup once again! Never in the history has the same team taken the cup home back to back. Congratulations Voyagers." Shane shut off his phone as he closed his eyes. He head led them to victory, twice. He had been captain. He had cared for his teammates, people he saw as brothers. The hard work had forged unbreakable bonds, or at least bonds he thought were unbreakable. He was wrong. or Shane Hollander is working through his feelings of being shunned by the Montreal Voyagers.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,778
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76683086
-
Ilya makes pelmeni by ilovelesbianism
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-12-30
Ilya’s love language is food… Shane has food issues. Will Shane be able to enjoy a Russian meal Ilya cooks for him? Good thing Ilya is a supportive boyfriend.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,003
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76740171
-
Shane dropped his gaze. “You’re really going to make me ask?” “Yes,” Ilya said. “You ask, maybe you get. So, ask.” “Okay,” Shane said. “I want you to fuck me.” Ilya started to laugh. “Don’t—this isn’t a fucking joke, alright?” Shane snapped. “Shut up. I want it to be different. Or, no—the same, but more. I want you to just make me fucking take it. Shit. I don’t know how to ask you for this.” “No, no, is good start so far,” Ilya said. “Go back to the part where I get to make you fucking take it. That’s good. Tell me more.”
- Part 1 of missing scenes
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 12,030
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #76021551
-
Ilya notices something is wrong the second Shane steps inside his condo. It's not so much the fact that he doesn't return Ilya's greeting. Or how he avoids his eyes while stepping inside, already busy taking off his jacket. It's the lack of a smile on his face. The dark circles underneath his eyes. His bottom lip bitten raw. They have been together long enough for Ilya to know everything there is to know about Shane. Even now, almost 7 years after they first started this 'thing' between them, he still learns new details. But if there is one thing Ilya understands all too well, it's that something isn't right when Shane grows quiet. Or, Shane breaks down after a rough couple of months and Ilya is there to pick up the pieces
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,638
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76161921
-
“I need to sleep,” Ilya murmurs next to him on the bed, his voice distant. “Yeah, me too,” Shane rushes to agree. His fingers drum against his glass of vodka and he chugs the rest in one go. “I should, uh…” He moves to stand up off the bed, the soiled towel dropping from his stomach, and his knees buckle. Shane stumbles but remains upright, his vision blurry. But the glass in his hands slips from his trembling fingers, and, to his absolute horror, shatters all across the floor of Ilya’s penthouse suite. ---- After the hookup where Shane and Ilya didn’t kiss, Shane nearly passes out in his rival’s hotel room.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,172
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #76069671
-
Pretty isn't Pretty by Sunsetz_mx
Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
2025-12-03
Thank god for his makeup stylist, honestly. Without her, he’d look like he’d been dragged through six time zones—and he usually had been. He didn’t know why this insecurity was grabbing him now. Ilya had never made him feel like he wasn’t enough. Not once.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,618
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #75171741
-
“Go away,” Ilya said, his voice muffled by something. Shane would bend space and time to give Ilya anything, but he would not grant him this. Instead, he pushed the door open, his heart breaking at the sight of Ilya in his massive bed, somehow looking tiny beneath the covers. “Ilya,” he said, the name escaping like an exhale. He had so much to say. So many things that needed fixing. So many apologies he owed him. “Shane, please-“ “I’ll go.” “Yes. Thank you.” “No - not… not to Montreal. To the party. If you’ll still have me.“ OR Shane attends Boodram’s Boxing Day Party. This is how it goes.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,074
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #73093761
- ← Previous
- 1
- 2