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Roz you are all trying to make my phone explode? Roz what is problem Roz is someone dying Roz someone better be dying Shane What’s happening? Is everyone okay? Hazy @Shane Do you have a tattoo? Shane DO I HAVE A WHAT? (the cens win the cup and go celebrating after. cue drunk shenanigans and hungover texting)
- Part 12 of hr: online edn
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- English
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- 1,662
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- 1/1
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- 1
- AO3:
- #83107811
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@shaneholender imagine getting to rail shane hollander everyday... ilya rozanov im cursing ur bloodline @therealilyarozanov Responding to @shaneholender 1. do not imagine that, he is MY husband not yours 2. that is ok with me pls do my shithead brother first - Harris (Chiron’s papa) Ilya get off your phone you have a concussion!!!! (10 years of ilya rozanov vs pr agents everywhere)
- Part 11 of social media/texting hollanov
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- English
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- 7,999
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- 1/1
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- 1
- AO3:
- #82747216
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Roz We are good looking and married and in love, is normal to be sexually active Hazy I’m sorry but no. There’s sexually active and there’s YOU TWO Shane @Hazy I’m confused. We only have sex everyday? Shane That’s not that much, is it? Dykstra I can’t tell if you’re joking or not???? Shane How often is normal? Roz Shut up Roz Everyone is banned from speaking Roz No more talking (overly touchy hollanov get an intervention)
- Part 7 of from the outside
- Part 3 of social media/texting hollanov
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- English
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- 3,550
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- 2/2
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- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #79130901
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r/RoseLandry Anonymous: Click link below to see Part 1 of Rose Landry’s private texts. Part 2 to be uploaded soon. Click here… Comments @rrredditor1837393 no way this is real lol @secretaccount656 Uh has no one else seen the bit about Shane Hollander being gay??? Is this why they broke up???? @selenawrites1 omg not rose and miles chatting shit about under dark hahaha @rosieposiexxx wait some of the texts between her and Hollander (her MHL ex boyfriend) seem a lil sus… @secretaccount656 if by a lil sus you mean GAY GAY GAY in big flashing lights and sirens, then yeah, it is a lil sus (rose’s texts get leaked)
- Part 16 of ways they didn't find out
- Part 9 of social media/texting hollanov
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- English
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- 3,659
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- 1/1
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- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #81478101
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"Anyway, I wanted to congratulate you." "...thank you." Scott said cautiously. "You are probably oldest to ever win Cup, so that is very impressive. They should give you special geriatric award." There it was. "Jesus fucking Christ, kid." Scott huffed a laugh. "You're a piece of work, you know that?" "Ah, but I am funny." Rozanov shrugged, sipping his vodka. "And hot." He winked at Kip. Kip's jaw flew open and Scott immediately pulled his boyfriend closer to him. So what if Ilya Rozanov was 100% straight and definitely trying to fuck with him? Scott still wasn't going to just stand there while fucking Rozanov flirted with his boyfriend. (kip meets ilya at the mvp award night. they become friends <3)
- Part 6 of the unexpected besties of the MHL
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- English
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- 3,121
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- 1/1
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- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #79191701
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“You have a message from: Lily.” The automated voice read out. Shane almost swerved into the other lane trying to press the mute button on the dashboard. ”Woah, eyes on the road, dude!” Hayden yelled. “Ayyy!” J.J cheered. “The famous Boston Lily! Let’s hear what she has to say.” The automated voice continued. “Can’t wait to have my [tongue emoji] in your [peach emoji].” (while shane is driving certain texts get read out by the car's bluetooth)
- Part 12 of ways they didn't find out
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- English
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- 1,846
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- 1/1
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- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #79130646
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“ Okay!” St-Simon interrupted loudly. “Can we please go five fucking minutes without hearing about your fucking dick?” … “You have a third message from: Jane. Gonna ride you so hard tonight.” “Holy fuck!” Connors laughed. “This fuckin girl! No wonder she locked down Roz!” St-Simon groaned. ”I just asked for five fucking minutes, man!” St-Simon whined. “Five!” (for years cliff marlow deals with jane. one unfortunate bluetooth connection reveals more)
- Part 13 of ways they didn't find out
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- English
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- 2,741
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- 1/1
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- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #79158486
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John Cook: Hollander keeps possession of the puck as Rozanov checks Cameron out of Hollander's way, and... Hollander scores! What a beaut of a goal that was! Patrick Colt: [laughing] I don’t think the opposition know what to do with themselves against Rozanov and Hollander. [Ilya Rozanov skates round to where Shane Hollander is standing. Hollander has a wide grin on his face after the recent goal. Rozanov collides into Hollander, hugging him jokily and leaning to plant a wet his on Hollander’s helmet. However, at the last second, Hollander turns to look at Rozanov. Their lips meet in a kiss. The two break apart instantly and stare at each other in horror.] Jack Saad: Oh. That’s… Hmm. John Cook: [spluttering] Erm- Patrick Colt: [faintly] Huh. Well. That’s not something you see everyday. (the shane/ilya helmet kiss at the 2017 all stars game but shane turns his head at the last moment and they kiss on the mouth. social media reacts)
- Part 11 of ways they didn't find out
- Part 4 of social media/texting hollanov
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- English
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- 1,436
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #79033321
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"Whatever. Just don't let yourself get distracted just to get your dick wet, Hollander." Cormeau sneered. Roz interrupted him. "It has been seven years and it has not distracted us yet. I do not know if you remember this, or maybe your brain is all fucked up from all the hits you take, but me and Hollander are captains and we have both gotten our teams to Cups. So mind your fucking business." Cliff sucked in a breath. Surely that wasn't true. It couldn't be true. 7 years. That would mean it had been going on this entire time. The entire of Roz's career. The entire of Hollander's career. 7 years. What the fuck. (flipping my fic love and other drugs on it's head. ilya gets hurt and is high when shane goes to visit)
- Part 9 of ways they didn't find out
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- English
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- 3,029
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- 1/1
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- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #78947421
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A little frantic, she grabbed a knife off the chopping block. Yes, she was aware this was a somewhat dramatic reaction to what she was sure was just her son cancelling his plans, but she wasn't going to find out empty handed like a fool from some budget slasher movie. She yanked open the door to find… Ilya Rozanov? He was naked. She screamed. “Ah!” Rozanov screamed back, grabbing a pillow from the bed and holding it to his crotch. “Blyat!” Ilya Rozanov was in Shane’s bedroom. In Shane's apartment. Naked. Wearing nothing. Naked. “Err-“ Rozanov broke the silence. “Erm-” Yuna repeated, suddenly feeling flustered. Burglars she could handle. Ilya Rozanov naked? Not so much. (yuna goes to shane's apartment and gets the shock of her life)
- Part 10 of ways they didn't find out
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- English
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- 3,019
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- 1/1
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- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #78947476
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@thisisilya ✔ Responding to @ShaneHollander24 ✔ This is very rude Hollander… I am TIRED @thisisilya ✔ Responding to @ShaneHollander24 ✔ your children have killed me. killed me dead. @ShaneHollander24✔ Responding to @thisisilya ✔ *our @thisisilya ✔ Responding to @ShaneHollander24 ✔ No yours only. I disown them. I divorce you. I sleep for 10 years. Goodbye, world. @ShaneHollander24 ✔ Responding to @thisisilya ✔ Don’t say that about our kids! What is wrong with you???? @thisisilya ✔ Responding to @ShaneHollander24 ✔ You do not know but they are beasts. Evil beasts. (snippets of ilya as a wag/stay at home husband & dad, as seen through social media <3)
- Part 6 of from the outside
- Part 5 of social media/texting hollanov
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- English
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- 2,052
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- 1/1
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- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #78779746
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Jane’s ex added Lily (Shane) and Shane Hollander into a group chat. Jane’s ex Okay Shane when am I meeting your man! Shane What Shane How did you even get his number? Shane Wait did you go through my phone? Lily (Shane) None of your business. Jane’s ex laughed at this message. Jane’s ex …maybe. Shane I’m sorry❤ Shane I don’t understand, are you two friends or something?? Lily (Shane) No Jane’s ex Yes! Jane’s ex It’s a work in progress! Jane’s ex But he’s warming up to me I can tell Lily (Shane) disliked this message. (rose steals lily’s number from shane’s phone. texting ensues as rose tries to get a new friend. ilya takes some convincing)
- Part 4 of the unexpected besties of the MHL
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- English
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- 2,058
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- 1/1
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #78055166
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He'd still not seen them kiss or touch in any way that signified love or affection, despite their now very public relationship and the elephant-in-the-room matching gold rings. No, instead, he’d seen Hollander push Rozanov away and tell him to 'fuck off'. The next half an hour did nothing to lessen his view that they do not seem very compatible. They barely touch. Every time Rozanov moved to touch his husband, Hollander moved away, looking awkward. Instead, they bickered and threw chirps at one another like they were still bitter rivals on the ice. Then, slowly but surely, Shane Hollander got drunk. The second the third vodka passed Shane's lips, Wyatt Hayes had let out a long-suffering sigh and said, "Here they go." Scott frowned, not understanding. "What do you mean?" Boodram chuckled. “Oh, you’ll see.” Scott and Carter exchanged a glance as if to say ‘what the fuck?’. (scott doesn't understand how hollander and rozanov work. one night in his bar is enough for him to realise that he's an idiot)
- Part 4 of from the outside
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- English
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- 3 versions
- AO3:
- #76648861
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This is the final straw, Shane thought, staring up at the enormous wall to wall billboard of Ilya in nothing but tight white Calvin Kleins. (yuna adopts ilya as her second son via brand deals. shane suffers.)
- Part 2 of from the inside
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- English
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- 2,934
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- 1/1
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- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #76653846
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Pike handed over the phone, unlocked. Cliff got his phone out and pulled up Ilya’s contact alongside ‘Lily’s’. Holy. Fucking. Shit. He was a fucking genius. “Holy shit, I was right!” Cliff leapt up from the seat. “Jane is Shane and Lily is Ilya! Holy fuck, I’m a fuckin’ genius. Just call me Poirot, motherfucker!” (cliff visits shane in hospital. him and hayden get chatting about lily and jane. cliff puts the pieces together)
- Part 8 of ways they didn't find out
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- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #77881036
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[Shane fishes around the bowl before pulling out a scrap of paper. He clears his throat and begins to read aloud.] Shane: I want Shane Hollander to- Shane: [looking up at the camera. His expression is shocked.] Oh my God? Shane: [speaking to someone off camera] Are you sure I can say this on camera? Harris: [off camera] Yes. Shane: Okay. Shane: [takes a deep breath]. Shane: I want Shane Hollander to f*ck me so hard I get sent to A&E. Shane: [blushing] Harris are you sure this is appropriate for the team social media? Shane: [frowning] Aren’t there any tweets about hockey or something? (the centaurs read thirst tweets)
- Part 1 of hr: online edn
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,089
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #77528106
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Jackie No offence but this is not what I expected from Shane’s girlfriend. Lily (Shane) I know he is so boring and I am so fun Lily (Shane) But opposites attract is the saying, no? Lily (Shane) Also I am not girlfriend Jackie Why not!! Jackie Sorry that was nosy Lily (Shane) Is okay Lily (Shane) Is complicated Lily (Shane) But I cannot let him go because he gives head like champion Jackie Girl!!!!!! (spreading the jackie & ilya bestie gospel!) Inspired by please leave a message by subcorax
- Part 7 of ways they didn't find out
- Part 3 of the unexpected besties of the MHL
- Part 6 of social media/texting hollanov
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- English
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- 3,547
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- 2/2
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #77451876
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Harris @Cliff @Hayden I know I’m not a hockey player but can I join the ‘Rozanov & Hollander are going to make me quit my job’ group?? Cliff Hahahah Hayden What did Rozanov do this time? Cliff Hey! Cliff How do you know it was Roz’s fault! Hayden Be serious right now. (snippets from the centaurs group chat & the extended support group chat which has hayden & cliff leading the cens through how to survive married hollanov)
- Part 2 of the unexpected besties of the MHL
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- English
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- 1,397
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- 1/1
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- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #77264816
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Hayden I just called Shane. Pretty sure Roz was giving him head on the other side. Just a warning for you. Cliff Ha! Hayden My suffering is not funny. Cliff Thanks for the heads up Cliff Get it? Hayden I'm blocking you (cliff & hayden's guide to surviving hollanov)
- Part 6 of ways they didn't find out
- Part 1 of the unexpected besties of the MHL
- Language:
- English
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- 3,744
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- 2/2
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- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #76653761
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“Just hang up.” A very, very familiar Russian voice. What the fuck? Ilya goddamn Rozanov was with Shane, at the cottage. With Shane. Oh, holy fuck. Lily. Ilya. (hayden has a long standing dislike for ‘lily’. a second phone call at the cottage makes him dislike lily even more)
- Part 4 of ways they didn't find out
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,069
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- 1/1
- Files:
- 3 versions
- AO3:
- #76549786