1 – 9 of 9 Works in Unconventional Format
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In March 2019, gambling syndicates dump data from 7,500 hacked athletes online - the biggest breach in sports history. Shane and Ilya's years of private texts are buried somewhere in three million leaked files. A story about privacy, professional hockey, and what happens when the internet finds what you thought was hidden. ----- (HCF): An early computer command that sent the machine into a race condition, forcing all instructions to compete for superiority at once. Control of the computer could not be regained.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 73,287
- Chapters:
- 10/?
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #77745341
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Lily: Well. There is very interesting studies I have read recently.
Karolina: We’re listening!
Lily: Research shows that abstinence can significantly improve athletic performance. Testosterone levels, energy conservation, mental focus. All better with sexual abstinence.
Jackie: Wait, seriously?
Lily: Oh yes, very serious research. Professional athletes should abstain completely during playoff runs. Some studies suggest 6-8 weeks for optimal results.
Satu: SIX TO EIGHT WEEKS?!
When “Lily” gets added to the Montreal Voyageurs WAGs group chat, she comes armed with peer-reviewed research, vibrators for everyone, and one revolutionary idea: a playoff sex ban for optimal athletic performance. The WAGs are convinced it’s evidence-backed science, the team is suffering, and Ilya is having the time of his life watching his handiwork unfold.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 13,739
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77840931
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"You are doing this on purpose," Ilya accused. Shane looked up, perfectly innocent. "Doing what on purpose?" "The—" Ilya gestured. "This. The—the organizing." "The organizing that I do. Every Thursday. Like I have for the entire time we've been together." "You know what you're doing." Shane's lips twitched. Just barely. But Ilya saw it. "I'm folding a hoodie." BREAKING: Local man gets pavlov'd by the KonMari method, more at 11.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,716
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #78081851
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the hot mic heard around the world (or how hollanov broke the internet) by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-13
The hot mic incident was just the beginning.
Now the internet watches in real-time as Ilya’s Spotify playlist gets leaked (with NOTES), Shane attempts subtlety (narrator: he fails), they bicker about boy bands on late night TV, someone admits to having a ring for six months ON TWITTER, and approximately 20 different social media platforms collectively lose their goddamn minds.
Featuring: journalists having breakdowns, Reddit threads that require moderator intervention, TikTok compilations with 1.2M views, brand partnerships from Skittles, a plague of engagement speculation, and two hockey players who cannot stop being chaotic disasters on main.
The fandom was writing fic about them. Turns out reality is messier, queerer, and somehow MORE unhinged.
[or social media reacts to the week following the Hot Mic Incident™, told entirely through tweets, Reddit posts, Instagram stories, podcast transcripts, and the world’s most romantic Spotify playlist]
- Part 2 of hot mics and hotter rivalries
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,067
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77626776
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in this essay i will (survive attempted murder by the universe) by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-07
Ilya Rozanov has three problems: 1) he’s an NHL superstar 2) he’s hopelessly in love with his supposed rival, and 3) apparently writing fanfiction about it has cursed him with biblically proportionate bad luck.
Between engine failures, fractured ankles, choking incidents, apartment floods, broken noses, fire alarms, and getting stuck in elevators, a reasonable person would stop writing.
Ilya Rozanov is not a reasonable person.
(A documentary of one man’s war against the AO3 author’s curse.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,875
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #77286711
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DefinitelyNotRozanov81’s Guide to Marriage, Hockey, and Destroying Your Husband’s Best Friend Through the Power of Fanfiction by Anonymous
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-05
“You wrote about us having sex while Hayden watches!”
“Fictional us,” Ilya corrects. “Real us would never do that. Probably.” He pauses. “Unless …”
“No!”
Ilya Rozanov has always been competitive. But when his husband’s best friend starts calling a little too often, Ilya discovers a new arena for dominance: Archive of Our Own.
Armed with a pseudonym that fools absolutely no one, explicit tags that would make a sailor blush, and a truly impressive commitment to pettiness, Ilya wages psychological warfare one kudos at a time. His weapon of choice? Extremely detailed fanfiction about why Hayden Pike will never, ever measure up.
The problem? Hayden writes back.
What follows is the most unhinged rivalry in hockey history: a battle fought not with fists or slapshots, but with comment sections, kudos, and increasingly creative ways to humiliate each other in front of thousands of readers. Featuring: footnoted statistics, educational sex advice, one very concerned wife, and Shane Hollander wondering what the hell he did to deserve this.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,367
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77167196
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love in the time of AO3 metrics by pucksandpower
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2026-01-03
Ilya Rozanov has exactly one problem with his secret relationship with Shane Hollander: Scott Hunter has more fanfiction than them. The solution is obvious. They’ll just have to make the internet ship them harder. What could possibly go wrong? Or in which two NHL players discover AO3, decide to manipulate their public image to generate more fanfiction, and not so accidentally come out in the process. Featuring: competitive nonsense, live television mishaps, and one very distressed Scott Hunter. Ilya is sprawling across Shane’s ridiculously expensive couch in Montreal when he discovers the betrayal. “Shane,” he says, and his voice has that particular quality that makes Shane look up immediately from where he’s chopping vegetables in the kitchen. It’s the tone that means Ilya has found something on the internet that will derail their entire evening. “No,” Shane says preemptively. “You do not even know what I am saying.” “I know that tone.” Shane points the knife at him, then seems to remember that’s probably not safe and puts it down. “That’s your ‘I found something online and now I’m going to be weird about it’ tone.” “I am never weird.” “You spent three hours last Tuesday looking up whether penguins could be gay.” “They can be! Was important research.” Ilya sits up, phone clutched in his hand like evidence. “But this is different. This is serious.” Shane wipes his hands on a towel and comes around the kitchen island. He’s barefoot, wearing joggers and one of Ilya’s new Centaurs hoodies that he definitely stole, and Ilya’s heart does something complicated in his chest. It’s been nine years and Shane still makes him feel like he’s seventeen and discovering what want means. “What is it?” Shane asks, softer now, because he can probably see something in Ilya’s face. “Scott Hunter has more fics than us on AO3.” Shane blinks. “What?” “Scott. Hunter.” Ilya enunciates each word with deep offense. “Has more fanfiction than Hollanov.” “Hollanov?” “Is our ship name. Keep up.” Ilya scrolls aggressively through his phone. “Look. Scott Hunter/Kip Grady has one thousand two hundred thirty-seven fics. Ilya Rozanov/Shane Hollander has nine hundred and eighty-three.” Shane stares at him. “You counted?” “AO3 counts for you. Is right there.” Ilya gestures at his screen. “And is bullshit. We are much better love story than Scott and his little smoothie boyfriend.” “His name is Kip, and they’re cute together.” “We are CUTER.” “Ilya-” “No, listen.” Ilya stands up, pacing now, phone still clutched in his hand. “We are generational talents. Best rivalry in hockey right now. Everyone says. The media, they love us. ‘Rozanov versus Hollander, the new Crosby and Ovechkin,’ they say. We have drama. We have passion.” “We have to keep it secret or we’ll destroy our careers and possibly get death threats,” Shane points out. “Details.” Ilya waves this away. “Point is, we are interesting! Scott Hunter is old and boring-” “He’s thirty-one-” “ANCIENT. And he is with normal guy who makes smoothies! Where is intrigue? Where is fire?” Ilya spins to face Shane, eyes bright with the particular intensity that means he’s gotten an idea, and those are always dangerous. “We should have more fics.” Shane crosses his arms, and oh, Ilya knows that posture. That’s Shane’s ‘I’m going to be reasonable and you’re going to hate it’ posture. “We can’t have more fics because people don’t know we’re together. Because we’re not out. Because it’s complicated.” “Maybe is too complicated.” “Ilya-” “Maybe we should make people suspect.” Ilya’s grin is sharp and reckless. “Nothing confirmed. Just … little things. Hints. Enough for people to write about.” “You want to bait fanfic writers into shipping us more?” “I want to beat Scott fucking Hunter, yes.” Shane’s mouth twitches. He’s trying not to smile, which means Ilya is already winning. “You know this is insane, right?” “You love when I am insane.” “I really don’t.” “You love me.” Shane’s face softens, the way it only does when they’re alone like this, when the walls come down and he stops being Shane Hollander, Canadian Golden Boy, and becomes just Shane. Just his. “Yeah,” he says quietly. “I really do.” Ilya closes the distance between them, and reaches down to cup Shane’s face. Ilya is four inches taller, which Shane will deny matters until his dying breath, but right now it means
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 14,156
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #77028326
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The MILF Theory (And Why the Internet Got It Wrong) by pucksandpower
Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
2025-12-29
The internet has decided that Ilya Rozanov is absolutely, definitely, 100% banging a Hollander. They’ve got photo evidence. Multiple sightings. Instagram stories from the same café. The man stayed OVERNIGHT at the Hollander residence. It’s the most legendary power move in NHL history: seduce your rival’s hot mom to assert dominance. There’s just one tiny problem with this theory. Ilya’s fucking a Hollander, all right. Just … not that one. Or in which Ilya’s boyfriend's mother keeps adopting him, the internet keeps assuming the worst, and Shane Hollander is having the worst month of his entire life. At least until he does something that breaks hockey forever. Translation into 中文-普通话 國語 available: 【授翻】香草妈妈理论（已完结） by 3Liquids Translation into Русский available: Это не то, что вы думаете! by dramione_must_reads r/hockey Posted by u/puckedup247 • 3h ago Okay what the FUCK is going on with Ilya Rozanov and Shane Hollander’s mom??? So I was at this charity thing in Ottawa yesterday (my aunt volunteers) and I literally saw Ilya Rozanov having brunch with Yuna Hollander. Just the two of them. At this cozy little place on Elgin Street. And like … they seemed REALLY comfortable with each other??? She kept touching his arm and laughing and he was doing that thing where he leans in all close when he talks. I took a pic but it’s blurry as hell (sorry, was trying to be subtle). Am I insane or is this weird??? Why would Rozanov be hanging out with his RIVAL’S MOM??? [Blurry photo of a curly-haired man in a leather jacket sitting across from an elegant woman with long black hair at a café table] 2.4k comments u/hockeyfan_617 819 points • 3h ago oh my fucking god u/BearsNation96 723 points • 3h ago LMAOOOOO this is the most alpha shit I’ve ever seen. Rozanov is literally fucking with Hollander by dating his mom. I’m fucking DECEASED 💀💀💀 u/VoyageursForever 651 points • 2h ago This cannot be real. This CANNOT be real. I refuse to believe this is happening. u/CheckingForHockey 589 points • 2h ago Guys, there’s probably a totally innocent explanation for- Actually no, I got nothing. This is wild. u/PuckSlut420 512 points • 2h ago okay but can we acknowledge that Yuna Hollander is like 52 and looks like THAT? I’d shoot my shot too tbh u/BearsNation96 301 points • 2h ago Right??? Total rocket. Rozanov’s got taste. u/MontrealMadness 445 points • 2h ago Shane Hollander is somewhere having a complete fucking meltdown right now and I wish I could see it u/hockeyinsider99 398 points • 2h ago This is the most elaborate mindfuck in NHL history. Rozanov saw “fuck the Voyageurs” and said “okay, specifically the mother of their first line center“ LILY: Someone on reddit has picture of me and your mama at brunch LILY: Is very blurry but still LILY: People think I am fucking her 😂😂😂 JANE: WHAT JANE: WHAT THE FUCK JANE: ILYA LILY: Is very funny! LILY: They think I do this to mess with you LILY: Like psychological warfare JANE: This is NOT funny JANE: People think you’re SLEEPING WITH MY MOTHER LILY: I know!!! 😂😂😂 LILY: Is hilarious JANE: ILYA. LILY: Shane, relax LILY: Your mama thinks is funny too LILY: She send me the reddit link JANE: oh my god JANE: oh my GOD
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 13,813
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 2 versions
- AO3:
- #76676306
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The video returns to the set, with the camera on Harris, Shane, and Ilya again. Harris flips to the next question card. Harris: Who expressed interest in the other first? Shane and Ilya each raise the other's shoe. Harris: Ooooo! You disagree! Ilya: Shane. We both know that it was you. Shane: You were showing off! On purpose! You wanted me to react. Ilya: If that helps you sleep at night. Harris: Care to tell the story? Shane and Ilya speak over each other. Shane: No way in hell. Ilya: After the cameras stop. Shane and Ilya, freshly married and days away from their first game together, agree to make a silly video as a couple for the Centaurs' social media.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,448
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #63718786