Summary:

"You guys," Olivia says in the tone of a woman who knows she is smarter than everyone else in the room and trying to be patient about it, "are way too invested in your captain's sex life."
"There is no such thing as being too invested in Rozy's sex life," Micky counters in a grave voice. "He pines."

It's the summer of 2014 and the dust of #RozSpotted is settling. Which is objectively good. Because Ryan Carmichael has a plan and it does not involve staying out of Ilya's business.

Or: How to trick your captain into locking down his long-term situationship—a guide for clueless beginners.