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The thing is, Shane is not stupid. He learned a thing or two from his last relapse. It had been a mess, dealing with Ilya and healing the wound. It wasn’t worth the trouble, he told himself. But what if it was? What if it is? He knows his body and mind is tricking him, the way it remembers the relief and not the complications. He can’t make sense of it because the memory of the pain and the airiness and the break from everything is so, so strong in his mind it kind of overpowers everything else. Or: Shane doesn't want to keep secrets from Ilya.
- Part 3 of Tangible
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,515
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #81856866
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Shane gets a sudden urge to push Ilya away and get dressed, to go to one of the guest bedrooms and hide under a blanket until this is long forgotten. All of this would be forgotten. But he doesn’t. Instead he reaches for Ilya’s face, leans forward, cradles it in both hands and tries to drag him upwards. Away from his thighs. “Look at me,” he says, desperately, “kiss me, kiss me, please.” Ilya’s eyes are wide as he pulls away, “Shane,” he says, voice stern, “from when?” Shane doesn’t know what to say, doesn’t know why he thought Ilya wouldn’t notice, why he thought it could still be something unsaid between them, something that was clearly there but wasn’t that big of a deal. “It doesn’t matter, Ilya please-” Or: Healing is never linear.
- Part 2 of Tangible
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,321
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #77512031
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He tries to hold it in, he really does, but something about the gentleness of Ilya’s touch, which is like nothing Shane’s ever experienced before, causes a sob to escape his lips and before he knows it there are tears streaming down his cheeks, and Ilya looks at him with shocked eyes. . Or: Shane struggles with expectations, introspection, and wanting to tell Ilya everything and nothing at the same time.
- Part 1 of Tangible
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,822
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Files:
- 1
- AO3:
- #75880386