Summary:

Rozanov wanted to hurt himself, or tried to hurt himself, or did hurt himself. Acknowledging the idea feels like staring directly at the sun. If Shane lets the thought settle, it’ll burn its way through every other thought he has.

Rozanov is catching a pillow that Sveta throws at him and smiling. He told Shane that therapy is working. He’s here. He’s fine.

Shane takes careful breaths and taps his right thumb to his fingers one by one as he sets aside that confusion and terror. Rozanov did not invite him here to freak out, so Shane’s not going to freak out.

Or: The summer after he wins the Cup for Boston, Ilya almost dies. Shane tries to cope.