Summary:

Shane texts, “Hi! Are you free tonight? I know it’s soon but we’re leaving town tomorrow for a few days, and I’d love to see you.”

Ilya would have made fun of him for that message. Ilya would have just gotten a “come over.” Ilya would have responded “where is romance, Hollander?” and Shane would say, “I’m fucking starting without you.” And Ilya would be at his door in 20 minutes.

Shane doesn’t think that would work on Sveta.

Or: What if Svetlana were Rose Landry?