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  1. Crestfallen by

    Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
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    2025-12-29

    “Although I wouldn't change it. I love cooking for him. And he loves eating it, yes Shane?" Shane didn't quite register the question. He was still somewhat stuck at the sentence about his diet. His eyes were clouded and unfocused, looking straight ahead in the direction of the camera but not on it, rather over it. "So who is the cook in your relationship?" "Usually me," Ilya chuckled, answering Harris's question. He looked at his husband, before looking back at the camera, "Shane is on this performative diet, so he can't eat normal food. He always drinks this disgusting shake in the morning. He swears, he likes it, but I can see his handsome face scrunching up every time, he drinks it, trying to fight the urge to throw up. It's also a pain in the ass, trying to find a recipe, he can have. Although I wouldn't change it. I love cooking for him. And he loves eating it, yes Shane?" Shane didn't quite register the question. He was still somewhat stuck at the sentence about his diet. His eyes were clouded and unfocused, looking straight ahead in the direction of the camera but not on it, rather over it. Ilya and him were doing a video with Harris, as some kind of promotion of their team. Apparently their fans were eager to hear more about their marriage, which didn't sit quite right with Shane and his privacy. Shane wasn't someone, who shared things about his personal life to just anyone. His instagram had a few posts only and they were all some kinds of ads, sponsorships and game related content. It was rare to see anything remotely personal on there, which was the exact opposite to his partner's account. Ilya's instagram was filled with random pictures. Anya, the cottage, things Shane liked, their wedding... he posted just about everything, he saw. If Shane showed even a little hint of interest in something as simple as a bird, Ilya would take a picture of it and post it. The man was the same with his tattoos too and his 'stupid wolf-bird' tattoo was a great example of this. That's why Shane was uncomfortable with this interview right from the beginning. And he thought, he was dealing with it well, until this question was asked. Who is the cook in your relationship? Shane did cook sometimes, but not very often compared to his husband. It was Ilya's hobby to cook, especially if he could do it with Yuna, Shane's mom. Ilya always had to prepare special meals for Shane, because he was on a diet. A performative diet. Ilya had to adapt, because Shane was being difficult. It came to a point, where Shane wasn't sure anymore, if the diet was actually good for him and helping him, or it was just the feeling of discipline and control, that the man enjoyed and cherished so much. It was something stable in his life. Ever since the secret about their relationship was out of the bag, nothing seemed to be constant in Shane's life. He switched teams, because his team wasn't accepting him anymore. The team he gave everything to. The team, he carried, to winning three Stanley cups. The team that celebrated every win with him. It changed, after Shane came out to them. Most of them were supportive, but Shane wasn't blind. He could see some of those faces looking at him with disgust. So different to their happy and excited expression. After his relationship was out, even the supportive teammates were angry at him. All except Hayden and J.J., because apparently, "we can acccept you being gay. What we cannot accept, is your relationship with ILYA ROZANOV. A person who is supposed to be your rival." Truth was, Ilya was never Shane's rival. The media made it up, because it was convenient for them. Shane used to wish, him and Ilya were rivals. He used to think, it'd make everything easier. They were seventeen, when the entire mess started. It was supposed to be a one time thing happening out of curiosity and the need to do something, that wasn't expected of them. However after a few years of occasional hook ups, Shane realized, he was in too deep. The curiosity changed into love and Shane found himself yearning for Ilya anytime, they were away from each other. It felt, like Ilya was the only person, who actually knew him. Listened to him. He had to thank his past self for actually admitting and acknowledging his feelings for once and inviting Ilya to the cottage. He wouldn't have his precious husband otherwise. Another thing that seemed to change all the time was people's perception and opinion on them, as if it mattered. But it did. At least to Shane... Before the secret was revealed, the only thing the media could talk about, was how well Shane played in his games. Now they talked about everything. Analyzing every single thing and shoving their nose everywhere. Shane Hollander was seen with Rose Landry, is he cheating on his husband? Shane Hollander wasn't at the present in the game against Montreal today, is he sick or just jealous? Shane was still not able to deal with this. At least not completely. Even before their relationship was exposed to the entire world, Shane already struggled with people's opinions on him and what could happen, if he came out publicly. He was terrified of being judged, as it was something, he was very familiar with in his childhood. Fear of messing up, fear of being different... fear of not being good enough. He literally had a panic attack, when his parents found out. Imagine, how he reacted, when the entire world knew. Before starting hockey, he wasn't very popular among others. He wasn't white. He wasn't neurotypical. He wasn't straight. It may've been the twenty first century, but that didn't mean, people were any kinder. People used to bully him a lot, when he was little. For missing social cues, not understanding stuff others did... a lot of things. "Do you agree with what Ilya said, Shane?" He was pulled out of his thoughts by Harris asking him, if his husband was right. He raised his head and was immediately hit with a bright light and the camera pointed right at his face. "Y-yeah sure, I do," he stammered through his sentence, managing a small, slightly awkward smile. He never really knew, how he should act in front of a camera, when he wasn't playing

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