why should I have to bear it?

1. baby, it's all relative by sugaslesbianbestie

   Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid

   • T
   • ✓

   2025-12-30

   Mark read
   • Shane Hollander/Ilya Rozanov
   • Shane Hollander
   • Ilya Rozanov
   • References to and discussions of emotional abuse
   • Discussions about childhood trauma
   • Inspired by my real life therapy conversation from years ago lmao
   • ilya and I do not have the exact same trauma but its close enough for me to project
   • I think Ilya has c-ptsd not just depression
   • I want to sign him up for trauma therapy
   • Take him to group w me
   • speaking of that
   • DBT skills mentioned lol
   • Not a mental health professional just very mentally ill/working through c-ptsd and has experience w multiple different therapy types lol
   • Shane has the tact of rose trying to start this conversation lmao
   • takes place after episode 6s end but still at the cottage
   • i love them laying on the couch together touching toesies so that’s happening again
   • Ilya’s dad is lucky he died before I got my hands on him
   • me typical yuna hollander mention
   • Emotional Hurt/Comfort
   • Ilya Rozanov Loves Shane Hollander
   • Shane Hollander Loves Ilya Rozanov
   • the autistic love language of doing research for someone to better communicate

   Shane knows he’s probably overstepping. They’re supposed to be having a good time at the cottage, relaxing. But it’s been on his mind, he feels it would explain some things about Ilya. “Like, would you say he was hard on you, too?” Ilya squeezes his eyes closed. “I do not know,” he says stiffly, shrugging his shoulders again as if he could physically shake off his unease. Yes, Ilya thinks, of course his father was hard on him. or shane and ilya have a conversation about how ilya had an emotionally abusive father and experienced childhood trauma

   • Part 1 of why should I have to bear it?

   Language:

   English

   Words:

   2,799

   Chapters:

   1/1

   Files:

   1

   AO3:

   #76683256

2. a kind of emptiness by sugaslesbianbestie

   Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid

   • T
   • ✓

   2026-01-14

   Mark read
   • Shane Hollander/Ilya Rozanov
   • Ilya Rozanov
   • Shane Hollander
   • very ilya centered ofc
   • thats my boy
   • Shane Hollander Loves Ilya Rozanov
   • its not my fic if theres no phone calls or texting basically
   • I think anya is an esa
   • change my mind !
   • You can't
   • I think ilya deserves an esa
   • touch starved ilya rozanov
   • ilya vs voicing he has needs
   • unfortunately ilya does not get any physical affection in this rip
   • sorry King
   • also
   • Not Beta Read
   • takes place during tlg
   • but my characterizations are always influenced by the show too lmao
   • someone hug ilya pls

   "Montreal is much closer to Ottawa than to Boston, of course. Yet somehow Shane feels farther away than ever before. Ilya doesn’ t think it’s Shane’s fault. Ilya knows what he agreed to. Ilya used to be used to not being touched. Now, it makes him feel like he’s dying." Started as a fic abt ilya being touch starved and how casual sex used to be very convenient and then I decided he deserves essentially an emotional support animal lol.

   • Part 2 of why should I have to bear it?

   Language:

   English

   Words:

   2,512

   Chapters:

   1/1

   Files:

   1

   AO3:

   #77650901