Is Shipping Only For Boats? – thingcalledlove

Chapter 1: One

The second Ilya Rozanov discovered what a burner account was, he had one. There were just so many bad hockey opinions available on the internet, and as the best hockey player the world had ever seen (probably the best they would ever see), he felt that it was his duty to go ahead and correct those opinions at any and every opportunity.

Daryl @PassThePuck · 4m Mark my words, Ilya Rozanov and Shane Hollander are going to fizzle out into nothing. The media is hyping them up. They are not that good. Ivan @HOCKEYMAN · 3m Hollander maybe. Rozanov will be best player to ever play in NHL Daryl @PassThePuck · 2m Okay there buddy. Let’s let Rozanov play his first NHL game before declaring him the GOAT.

Ilya frowned at his screen. Goat? Like “baa”? Did goats baa? Or was that a sheep? He opened a new Google search.

What is GOAT?

He clicked on the first result from the Oxford Dictionary.

Noun - Informal a person, especially a sports player, who is excellent or the best in their field. example - "fans will get a chance to see the GOAT one final time in person”

Ilya nodded to himself, now understanding. He navigated back to the Twitter thread and typed out a reply.

He closed out of the website and made to put his laptop away for the night. He did, after all, have his first ever practice with Boston the next morning. However, something made him pause. He pulled the laptop back towards him.

What sound does goat make?

---

Josh @Josh1625 · 8m Can’t believe Boston drafted a European with their first overall. Everyone knows that they can’t handle real NHL hockey. Ivan @HOCKEYMAN · 4m I am European. I play real hockey. Josh @Josh1625 · 2m LOL on XBOX? Ivan @HOCKEYMAN · 1m No. On ice.

It never made him mad to be doubted. In fact, he kind of enjoyed it when people doubted him, because it gave him a chance to prove them wrong…and he always proved them wrong. This Josh person was one of his biggest doubters at the moment. Out of curiosity, he clicked on the user profile and was flooded with a feed full of toxic tweets. He laughed as he scrolled through the Twitter replies, stopping suddenly at one. He clicked it to reveal the entire Twitter thread.

Becca @HollanovIsReal · 11d Watching Boston vs. Montreal and I SWEAR #Hollanov is in love. #HockeyOTP #ShipIt Josh @Josh1625 · 11d Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov are not in love. You are actually delusional. Get help. Ella @Rozanovvvv · 11d @Josh1625 Chill out. It’s just shipping. Let people enjoy hockey and their OTPs. Trishaaaaa @NHLBarbie · 11d @Josh1625 You’re acting like this is a crime. Becca’s cute, let her have fun.

Um. What? Hollanov? Like Bennifer and Brangelina? Him and Shane? How did they know? It had only really been the one time after the CCM ad shoot. The gym after draft day couldn’t even count as a time. And it was hardly them being in love. With his heart beating a mile a minute, Ilya clicked into the Becca user profile. After a few minutes of scrolling, his heartbeat returned to a normal speed. They didn’t know. They were just…pretending? Hoping? Imagining? But why? Once again, he found himself opening a new window on his laptop with his brow furrowed.

What is shipping? Different types of shipping? Is shipping only for boats? How to ship without a boat? OTP meaning? Hockey OTP? Hollanov OTP? Why people ship hockey players? How to know if two players in love? Are Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov in love? Are hockey players allowed OTP? Popular HockeyOTPs?

--- Ilya lounged back on his couch, popping a fry into his mouth as the Montreal vs. Nashville game played on his TV. Svetlana plucked a fry from the container resting on his stomach as she leaned into his side. “Are you familiar with shipping?” Ilya asked, slipping into his native tongue with ease. He didn’t have many people in his life to speak to in Russian now that he was living in America, so he cherished his ongoing friendship with Svetlana deeply. “Like when you send something to someone?” she asked, her expression confused. “No, like…” He struggled to find the words. “English slang. Shipping. Relationships.” “Ohhhh,” Svetlana replied, suddenly amused. “Yes, I am very familiar with that type of shipping.” She paused, glancing at him. “How did you even find out about that?” “Twitter,” Ilya replied. It was the truth. Technically. Svetlana nodded. “Yeah, that makes sense. Twitter is full of that. Did someone send you a Rozlow edit?” “A what?” “Rozlow edit. You and Marlow.” A look of pure horror crossed his face, which sent Svetlana into a fit of giggles. “People think that Marlow and I should be together? Cliff Marlow?” “It’s a small group,” Svetlana laughed, “but they make some great edits. Here, let me show you.” She pulled out her phone, and in what felt like no time at all, she shoved a video toward him, set to Toxic by Britney Spears. Baby, can’t you see I’m calling? [A clip of Marlow on the phone] A guy like you should wear a warning [Ilya, shirtless, in a locker room interview] It’s dangerous, I’m falling [Marlow falling on the ice after passing Ilya the puck] There’s no escape, I can’t wait [Ilya and Marlow tapping helmets on the bench] I need a hit, baby, give me it [Marlow slamming a New York player into the boards] You’re dangerous, I’m loving it [Ilya in another interview, this time winking at the camera] There was nothing outwardly romantic about the clips, but the editing and the lyrics went a long way toward making it seem like there just might be. They were startled by the sound of cheering from the TV. Ilya looked up in time to see a replay of Shane’s goal. The camera followed him as he celebrated, first being hugged by Hayden Pike and then a few others. “Now that is a popular hockey ship,” Svetlana said softly. “Shayden.” “Shane Hollander and Hayden Pike?” Ilya asked with undisguised disgust. “At least Cliff Marlow is a good fucking hockey player. Hayden Pike is trash. He isn’t even top ten on Montreal.” “I didn’t say I shipped it,” Svetlana said, holding up her hands, slightly surprised by Ilya’s tone. “Besides, they both give me bottom energy.” Ilya’s lips quirked at that for a second before he shook his head. “I do not want to know any more about shipping.” “Probably for the best,” Svetlana replied sagely, stealing yet another fry.

---

Despite what he had told Svetlana, he did not, in fact, stop learning about shipping. On a whim, he had quietly followed Becca, the girl with the @HollanovIsReal account, and gotten quite a kick out of her tweets. A majority of his time was still dedicated to trolling hockey fans, of course. It wasn’t until he was sitting in the locker room during the All-Star game, scrolling on his phone between the second and third period, that he stumbled on Becca live-tweeting.

Becca @HollanovIsReal · 49m All-Star game. Ilya just skated by Shane on the bench and clearly said something to him. #Hollanov #AllStarEvidence Sam @HockeyMom101 · 48m Becca… are you seriously live-tweeting this? Becca @HollanovIsReal · 47m YES. This is peak Hollanov energy. You saw it too, right? Liam @pucktheguardians · 46m …you know players chirp each other, right? Ella @Rozanovvvv · 43m Becca, you are unhinged and I love it. Becca @HollanovIsReal · 42m Someone clip this interaction. It’s going to be important. I know it.

Ilya could not help himself. He replied to the thread with a simple:

Ivan @HOCKEYMAN · 1m Could be

It was his first time interacting with the account. He grinned as he tossed his phone back into his cubby and started to put his shoulder pads back on. It was the truth, after all: the short interaction he had had with Shane could end up being quite important. He’d have to wait until tonight to see if Shane would make use of Ilya’s hotel room number, which he had carelessly whispered as he skated by.

---

Ilya hadn’t had the opportunity to look at Twitter much in the last few days. The night of the All-Stars game did result in Shane coming over, which had been an excellent turn of events and a very busy night for them both. He had flown out first thing in the morning and was now in the middle of a small stretch of away games on the West Coast, resulting in shared hotel rooms and just enough jetlag to throw off his usual routine. Besides, he was finding his continuous texts with Shane far more enjoyable than insulting people on Twitter. He did eventually make his return on a quiet evening between games while watching Shane skate circles around Carolina’s defensemen on the small hotel TV. He ended up back on Becca’s Twitter thread and was surprised to find an invitation and link to view something called the Hollanov Evidence Files on a website called Tumblr. He clicked on it and was immediately met with a banner featuring a gif of him and Shane looking at one another during a face-off. The newest post caught his attention.

All-Star Bench Interaction – Frame By Frame Analysis

At 7:42 of NHL All-Star Game broadcast. I have clipped, zoomed-in, and slowed down the footage to 0.25x real-time. There are 189 frames in total, but we are going to focus on a select few. In frames 68–149, we see Ilya Rozanov skate past the other bench. FOCUS ON WHAT HAPPENS WHILE HE DOES THIS. It is important. As Ilya passes by Shane, he LEANS FORWARD. Their lips are mere INCHES apart. You can see that Ilya opens his mouth and SAYS SOMETHING DIRECTLY TO SHANE. From this angle, I cannot make out exactly what is being said. But when you look at the slowed-down footage, it looks almost like a consonant, followed by a vowel. Some type of code, maybe????? Ilya looks at Shane with INTENSITY. It is clear that whatever message he is delivering is one that is VITAL FOR HIM TO GET ACROSS TO SHANE. I know some people (Josh) might think Ilya was just chirping Shane, but Shane does not look mad or angry or insulted. He looks STUNNED. CONFUSED. BEFUDDLED. That is not the expression of a man who just got chirped/insulted/made fun of. We do not get to see more because Shane is then blocked by Scott Hunter’s big unwanted head. If anyone has another angle of this, please send it to me. My inbox is open. Sidenote: Can you imagine if Ilya was giving Shane his room number or something??? Don’t worry, I know how outlandish that sounds. I have not gone that far off the Hollanov deep end…yet.

Ilya leaned back against the pillows on his hotel bed, blinking at the glowing screen. He was completely lost for words. How the fuck had she figured it out? He bookmarked the page because this…this was something he would have to keep a close tab on.

Chapter 2: Two

Chapter Notes

Thanks so much for all your lovely comments on both the first chapter of this fic as well as on the first fic in this series <3 See the end of the chapter for more notes The intention was never to actually create a Tumblr account…it just kind of happened. Ilya reasoned that it gave him more access to what was being said in this corner of the internet, and with a quick press of a follow button, everything Becca posted on her Hollanov Evidence Files page was neatly displayed in his feed without him ever having to go searching for it. He discovered that Tumblr also has several other things of interest. For example, he found many images of himself on it. He also found several GIFs of his best goals and highlights. Along with several fans singing his praises at every turn.. It was nice to be appreciated, and recognized for how truly great he actually was for once. Another thing he stumbled across, accidentally of course, was Shane Hollander’s face. Everywhere. They had not spoken in a few months, since the Olympics, when Ilya had made the decision to shut the other man out. It didn’t do anything to curb his attraction though. Ilya particularly enjoyed the brand shoots. Shane was usually wet, shirtless or dressed in crisp button-up shirts looking like a present that he desperately wanted to unwrap. Ilya was down bad, not that he would ever admit it. Especially since he had purposely been keeping his distance these last few months. He just needed to cleanse Shane out of his system. That was all. “Just need to forget about him,” Ilya mumbled to himself in Russian as he hit reblog on another photo of Shane from his Rolex shoot.

---

Ilya took a sip of the cheap vodka at the bar of the NHL Awards. He had just left Shane in the bathroom with promises he intended on delivering later that night. It didn’t stop him from feeling on edge though. He pulled out his phone and started scrolling through twitter a bit mindlessly until he stopped on a recent post.

Becca @HollanovIsReal · 16m NHL Awards. Shane and Ilya are presenting together. I swear he brushed his hand down Shane’s back after the selfie on stage. #Hollanov #Confirmed Trishaaaaa @NHLBarbie · 15m Babe… it’s been years. Let it go. Ella @Rozanovvvv · 12m I’m dead. Becca’s still on this? She’s relentless and I love it. Ivan @HOCKEYMAN · 8s I noticed too

He couldn’t help himself. He didn’t engage much, but he did enjoy tossing in an encouraging thought here and there. It gave Becca some validation, warranted or not, and also seemed to piss off Josh, which was an added bonus. He wasn’t in love with Shane Hollander, but Becca didn’t need to know that. He found her dedication to them kind of sweet. He had seen some of the other shippers online, particularly the shayden shippers, and they were truly unhinged, and overbearing. Becca was just happy to exist in her own little world, never tagging his or Shane’s official Twitter accounts, or the NHL, or other players on their teams. Ilya appreciated that. He approved of her as the captain at the helm of their ship.

---

Llyod @HollanderOverrated · 10m Shane Hollander is the most overrated player in this league. Ilya Rozanov too for that matter. Ivan @HOCKEYMAN · 1m Never saw someone so confident and so wrong. Melanie @InTheFiveHole · 45s Imagine thinking two generational talents who have broken literal records in the league are overrated.

---

Sadie @AdmiralsWillWin · 3m Scott Hunter. The man you are. Greatest of All-Time??? Ivan @HOCKEYMAN · 2m Scott Hunter is oldest man alive Sadie @AdmiralsWillWin · 1m That’s not nice. I thought we were friends. Ivan @HOCKEYMAN · 45s We are friends. Friends tell you when you are wrong.

---

Killa @NeutralZoneGuy · 10m How does fucking Boston keep making the playoffs? It’s insane. Why isn’t my team in the playoffs? #Conspiracy Ivan @HOCKEYMAN · 8m Has your team tried winning? Sanjiv @PuckProblems · 7m YOOOOOOO…That’s a violation…LMAO Fernando @ChaosOnTheBlueLine · 6m LOL GOT’EM

---

Life was good. He was in Florida for the All-Stars game. Him and Shane finally got to play together on the same team, Rose was no longer in the picture and it was fucking magical. The cherry on top was that he currently sprawled in his hotel bed with Shane next to him. “You know fans? How they sometimes make pretend relationships? Of players?” Ilya asked into the comfortable silence. Shane looked at him, “You mean like when fans ship players together?” “Yes!” Ilya exclaimed. “You are aware?” “Yeah, I’m aware,” Shane said, his face pinching into an expression of annoyance. “There are these like…shayden shippers that want me and Hayden together. They’ve been quite a problem.” “How so?” “Well,” Shane said, running his fingers through his hair, “Jackie, Hayden’s wife, had to make her instagram private because people kept leaving all these horrible comments. Some of them even accused their kids of being fake.” Ilya winced. “That is awful.” “Yeah,” Shane agreed, “Jackie does not deserve that.” There was a momentary pause, then Shane looked at Ilya again seriously, “What do you know about shipping?” “There is group, very small. They ship us.” “Us?” Shane asked a bit bewildered, they were considered mortal enemies on the ice. “Yes. Us. We are Hollanov.” Shane snorted at that. “But,” Ilya continued, “they seem sane…mostly. Don’t bother anyone. Just one tumblr account. Few tweets.” “How did you find them?” Shane asked curiously. “I…stumbled on it…purely accident.” You stumbled across it?” Shane asked skeptically. “Yes,” Ilya said with a sigh. “I have…burner account.” Shane’s eyes lit up as he let out a laugh, “Oh, this I have to see. Show me.” Ilya let out a sigh, but there was a small grin on his face as he passed Shane his phone, already logged into the burner account on Twitter.

Jakob @DrillBabyDrill · 6h Hollander has no skill. Ivan @HOCKEYMAN · 6h This is why he win skills competition at All Stars weekend, yes?

Tomaz @IceToMeetYou · 8h Man, if Shane Hollander didn’t play for Montreal, they’d never win anything. Ivan @HOCKEYMAN · 8h Yes. This is truth.

Chad @CrossCheckChaddy · 10h Why is Rozanov KISSING Hollander like that? Shit is gross. Ivan @HOCKEYMAN · 9h You Homophobic? Chad @CrossCheckChaddy · 9h What? No. Jealous and bitter but not homophobic. Honestly, as a straight man, I would get down on my knees and suck them both off at the same time if it meant they played for my team and brought us home a cup. Josh @Josh1625 · 9h Wild the things people admit to on the internet.

Shane laughed, causing a warm feeling to rise up in Ilya’s chest. He leaned over to kiss the other man tenderly. “You even defended me in some of these,” Shane said after a moment. “Of course,” Ilya scoffed, “You are second best NHL player.” “Second best.” “Yes.” Shane’s attention returned the phone. “What’s this?” Ilya leaned over to see what Shane was looking at. “That is Becca. She is main Hollanov shipper. She has a Tumblr.” “Can I see it?” “Yes, see whatever you want.” Shane clicked into and was met by an exposé of the kiss they shared on the ice of the All Star game earlier that weekend. He scrolled…and scrolled…and scrolled, eyebrows shooting up. He wasn’t exactly reading it as much as he was seeing how much of it there was to read. “It’s still going,” Shane remarked. Ilya shrugged from beside him. “I said mostly sane, yes?”

Chapter End Notes

This was supposed to be two parts, but more scenes just kept appearing to I've extended it to three! Also, let me know if you have any ideas for fics in this series (social media au world). I have a few in the works, so there will be more when this story is done, but I'm also open to suggestions.

Chapter 3: Three

Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes Ilya wasn’t shocked when he saw the polarizing reaction to his free agency signing with the Ottawa Centaurs. He scanned through the reactions rolling in on Twitter as he lounged on the couch at Shane’s cottage, feet resting in Shane’s lap. Yuna talked about the optics of the signing from where she was curled up with her phone on Shane’s other side, while David had removed himself from all the hockey and contract talk over twenty minutes ago and was now outside grilling hotdogs. “What are people saying?” Shane asked curiously, looking over at him. Ilya shrugged, “It is mix. Some good. Some bad.” “It can’t be that bad, read some out?” Shane asked giving Ilya’s foot a little rub.

Jakob @DrillBabyDrill · 2m Ilya Rozanov choosing OTTAWA over Boston is the worst betrayal I’ve felt since my dad left.

“Oh…it is that bad,” Shane replied with a grimace, “They can’t all be like that?”

Tomaz @IceToMeetYou · 8m We gave him Cups. We gave him love. And he goes to fucking Ottawa??? Be serious.

Josh @Josh1625 · 1m From Stanley Cups to golf by April. Unreal.

Sanjiv @PuckProblems · 4m I don’t understand this move from a winning perspective but okay.

Killa @NeutralZoneGuy · 9m Leaving a contender to rot in Ottawa is certainly…a choice.

Fernando @ChaosOnTheBlueLine · 1m Hope the money was worth it because no one watches Ottawa hockey.

“Fuck,” Shane said finally, “I’m sorry.” “Why?” Ilya asked, looking at Shane with an expression of fondness, “I am not.” Yuna looked at both of them with her hand on her heart and the softness expression Ilya had ever seen on her face in the time that he had known her. “I, for one, am thrilled to have you in Ottawa,” she said finally. “We’ve been needing a reliable first line center for years, and now to get one of the best in the league? It’s going to be great.” Warmth bloomed inside him as he took it all in. He had grown very fond of this little family he had found himself a part of. He would happily read through millions of hate comments if it meant that he could keep this. Shane made a very exaggerated eyeroll at his mom’s comment, but there was a smile playing on his lips. Ilya knew that Shane loved that his parents had welcomed Ilya into the fold as easily as they had done. Even if it meant he was now playing second fiddle to his boyfriend on occasion. “There have to be some positive ones,” Shane insisted. Ilya smirked, “Maybe.” Shane shook his head, “Trying to get some sympathy by reading the mean ones first?” “Maybe,” Ilya replied with an innocent expression that could not hide the slyness in his eyes.

Ella @Rozanovvv · 7m EVERYONE LAUGHING NOW BUT WAIT UNTIL ROZANOV DRAGS THE CENS INTO THE PLAYOFFS KICKING AND SCREAMING

Liam @pucktheguardians · 6m Lowkey if anyone could make Ottawa watchable it’s him.

Trishaaaaa @NHLBarbie · 9m I don’t care WHERE Rozanov plays, hockey is just more fun when he’s in the league. Ottawa girls, you are blessed.

Melanie @InTheFiveHole · 11m This hurts actually. Like I get it but I also hate it. Love you forever, Rozanov.

Daryl @PassThePuck · 4m Boston losing Rozanov feels like a breakup where you say you’re happy for them but you’re lying.

“And what did Becca have to say about it?” Shane asked after Ilya finished reading out all the flattering tweets he had withheld previously. Ilya frowned, not having seen anything from her in his feed, which was not typically like her. He clicked into her account from his following list and then let out a chuckle. He read the tweet out loud, then quickly fired off a response.

Becca @HollanovIsReal · 45m ILYA ROZANOV JUST SIGNED WITH OTTAWA. HE’S MOVING CLOSER. I DON’T CARE WHAT ANYONE SAYS. HE'S DOING IT FOR SHANE #HOLLANOV Josh @Josh1625 · 43m I’m sure it had nothing to do with Ottawa having the cap space to offer Rozanov 12.8M a year, unlike Boston who could only offer 8M. Ivan @HOCKEYMAN · 1s Maybe both.

“What’s a Hollanov?” Yuna asked curiously, looking between the two of them. Shane let out a groan while Ilya smiled with delight. “Well, you see. On Twitter, there is Becca. Becca knew we were in love before we even did,” Ilya said before diving into the ins and outs of shipping with Shane’s mom, far more enthusiastically than Shane was prepared for.

---

And then they were outed. Ilya did not like that it happened this way. Through Hayden fucking Pike’s fanmail video. A private, intimate moment shared with the world. He knew that Hayden wasn’t the one to blame. Neither Shane nor he held it against the other man. It had been a complete accident on his part. This Ilya knew wholeheartedly. It was not that he was ashamed. That was the strange part. He was actually relieved, in a way, that he did not have to hide Shane anymore. That everyone finally knew that he was Shane’s and Shane was his. It wasn’t a secret anymore. It wasn’t something he had to hide. But it mattered how things were done. And this was not on their terms. They hadn’t wanted to be discovered. Not like this. He had not opened Twitter since the news broke. He did not need to. He could already imagine it, hot takes, think pieces, jokes, cruelty beyond compare. The NHL, as an organization, was not a welcoming environment for those who were different. Their hand was forced, and Ilya knew it would be an uphill battle for him and Shane. The commissioner was already making things difficult. But they would do this. They would fight for their relationship. In the end, a joint Instagram post had gone up, where they were finally able to share their relationship on their own terms. A few photos, as well as a caption that had come through their agent. There was no going back now. Not that Ilya wanted to. His phone buzzed, pulling his attention to it. While he had silenced most of his social media, he had allowed push notifications from a handful of accounts. He smiled when he read the tweet, typing out a quick and simple reply before tucking his phone away. There was nothing else on the app he had any interest in seeing.

Becca @HollanovIsReal · 1m Shane and Ilya just put out an Instagram post! I am so happy they can finally live their truth, but I am still so angry about how it all went down. #Hollanov #RespectTheirPrivacy Ivan @HOCKEYMAN · 9s You are good person, Becca.

---

As the training for the new season started, Ilya left Shane’ side for a moment, admiring his husband in his new Ottawa gear as he flagged down Harris with a gloved hand. “Harris. I need favour.” “Anything,” Harris replied dutifully from the other side of the boards where he had been leaning talking to Troy Barret.

---

Becca @HollanovIsReal · 2m UMMMMMMMMM. WHAT? ALSO WHO? AKA WHO??????I’M SO CONFUSED [Attached image - A Shane Hollander Ottawa Centaurs Jersey laying next to a Ilya Rozanov Ottawa Jersey. Two front seat tickets to the Ottawa home opener laying on top of the jerseys, a note that says “Thanks for all your support!” and a polaroid of Ilya and Shane that is signed by them both with something scribbled out] Ella @Rozanovvvv · 2m HOLY FUCKING SHIT Trishaaaaa @NHLBarbie · 1m Does this mean they know who you are, Becca?

Sadie @AdmiralsWillWin · 58s WHAT DID THEY SCRATCH OUT? WHAT DOES THAT SAY? Ivan @HOCKEYMAN · 51s Social Media team remove it. Josh @Josh1625 · 43s So…who are you taking with you to the game? Becca @HollanovIsReal · 35s @josh1625 not sure yet, why? Josh @Josh1625 · 21s I moved to Ottawa for work recently, so I’d go with you, if you wanted? And even if you went with someone else, maybe we could still grab a bite to eat or something? ---

Chapter End Notes

[alt link to image at the end if it does not work for you: https://ibb.co/mgrRMW3] Thanks so much for reading and just loving this little series with me. I have been sucked back into fandom yet again by this amazing pairing and I'm having such a fun time with this little world. As for this series, I have two more fics planned for sure. The next one is a absolutely unhinged crack fic that no one has asked for, and the one after that might be the one MANY of you have asked for...o.o So stay tuned, or don't, it's all up to you! I love you regardless <3 Thank you for all the love. Please drop by the Archive and comment to let the creator know if you enjoyed their work!