Rating:

Mature

Archive Warning:

No Archive Warnings Apply

Category:

M/M

Fandoms:

Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid

Relationships:

Shane Hollander/Ilya Rozanov, Jean-Jacques Boiziau | J. J. Dagenais/Cliff Marlow | Cliff Marleau, Cliff Marlow | Cliff Marleau & Ilya Rozanov, Jean-Jacques Boiziau | J. J. Dagenais & Shane Hollander

Characters:

Shane Hollander, Ilya Rozanov, Jean-Jacques Boiziau | J. J. Dagenais, Cliff Marlow | Cliff Marleau

Additional Tags:

Texting, Texting Fic, Gay Awakening, Shane Hollander is So Done, Humor, Sexual Humor, No Angst, Good Friend Shane Hollander, Good Friend Ilya Rozanov, Himbo Cliff Marlow | Cliff Marleau, i have fallen for the Cliff is dumb as fuck propaganda, Bisexual Cliff Marlow | Cliff Marleau, Bisexual J.J., Implied Sexual Content, Shane Hollander Loves Ilya Rozanov, Ilya Rozanov Loves Shane Hollander, Crack Treated Seriously, Fluff and Crack, Attempt at Humor, Married Shane Hollander/Ilya Rozanov, Down Bad Ilya Rozanov, Gratuitous talk of eating ass, Ilya Rozanov Eats Ass, First Husbands of Hockey, Cliff Marleau also eats ass, Short & Sweet

Language:

English

Series:

Part 1 of HR Texting Fics

Stats:

Published: 2026-08-06 Words: 1,592 Chapters: 1/1

Too Early

Summary

Marly: Roz
Marly: Roz
Marly: Roz
Marly: I think I’m bilingual 

**

J.J. and Marly hook up after a Boston and Montreal match, effectively discovering that they are both bisexual. Unfortunately, they could not figure this out themselves, and Ilya and Shane are woken up at the ass crack of dawn to help with their friends' inability to process their feelings.

Notes

This is my first texting fic, so I'm sorry if everything is a bit wonky, but I hope you enjoy it nonetheless.

As per usual, rant at the end

MWAH :3

Chat with JJ and Capitaine 😍😍 

January 26, 2022

4:05 AM 

JJ: Captain 

JJ: Best player in the whole league 

JJ: I need help 

6:42 AM 

What??? 

JJ, are you okay??? 

Why is your life 360 off?

Turn it on so I can find you.

JJ: It is okay Cap 

JJ: I’m not in danger 

You asshole. 

I thought you died.

What the fuck happened? 

JJ: Well, before I start 

JJ: Have I ever congratulated you on your marriage? 

J.J. 

JJ: It’s a beautiful marriage

JJ: I am so happy for you 

JJ: It warms my soul to see you so happy. 

JJ: Even if it is to Rozanov 

Jean Jacques Boiziau. 

What did you do. 

JJ: I may have slept with Cliff Marleau 

JJ: ... 

JJ: Cap? 

JJ: You have been typing for five minutes 

What the fuck do you mean you MAY. have slept with Cliff Marleau? 

JJ: Well 

JJ: I mean he’s taking a shower right now 

JJ: In his bathroom 

JJ: I am in his bed. His room is very nice. 

JJ: But you know, maybe it was a bro-ly thing. Like I just happened to sleep in his bed and we just happen to also be naked 

JJ: I was really drunk so I kind of can’t remember 

JJ: I can’t find a condom or anything 

JJ: Never mind 

JJ: I found it 

Firstly, a "broly" thing??? 

Secondly,

Jesus Christ. 

You guys didn’t throw it away??? 

JJ: (Replying to I was really drunk…) ^^^ 

JJ: He was also really drunk 

JJ: Apparently too drunk to take it to bathroom trash

Okay, start over. 

How did this happen? 

JJ: Well, you know Boston played in Montreal last night 

JJ: We lost by a point 

JJ: Humiliating 

JJ: Especially with their rookie line up 

JJ: So I went to a club to lick my wounds 

JJ: Well, Boston was there too 

JJ: Cliff introduced himself, said we had met at the wedding 

The fact that he’s on first name basis is mildly concerning.

JJ: He was inside of me last night, Hollander. 

JJ: Why would I not call him by his first name? 

Well, that answered a very pressing question I had. 

Also, you would be very surprised. 

JJ: Anyway, he was already a little hammered 

JJ: So was i 

JJ: He asked me what I thought about you two getting married 

JJ: I said I may not be the biggest fan of Rozanov, but I was happy that you were happy 

JJ: And that anyone with eyes can see that he treats you right 

JJ: He nodded and kind of paused for a minute, and then he said that he never understood why Rozanov gave up pussy if he loved it so much 

Wow. Thanks Marleau. 

JJ: Don’t worry Captaine 

JJ: I told him that you had to have the best ass in the league that was BETTER than all that pussy Rozanov had in the past 

JJ: No disrespect to those women of course. 

That is not comforting like you think it is. 

JJ: He said he meant no disrespect to your hole game 

I’m going to throw up. 

JJ: I also said I wouldn’t knock sleeping with men until I tried it 

JJ: And then within like thirty minutes he was inside of me 

I feel like we skipped several steps here. 

JJ: Maybe it was more like an hour and a half 

JJ: We had to stop by a Walmart to get some things 

JJ: And I had to take a shower and watch a YouTube tutorial on how to get cleaned up 

JJ: But I don’t really remember that 

JJ: The next thing I knew I was like 

JJ: Here let me draw it out for you 

I really don’t think that’s necessary.

JJ: [Image of a very poorly done drawing of J.J. and Marleau. It seems to be done on a Snapchat filter. Despite being stick figures, all parts are shown. They are both smiling]

What the fuck am I looking at. 

JJ: I’m the brown stick figure 

Well, I got that much. 

Was including your dick really needed?

JJ: Yes it was a vital player 

JJ: I really liked it 

I got that considering there are smiles in the picture 

JJ: I want to fuck him next time 

There’s already a next time?? 

JJ: Well 

JJ: I want there to be 

JJ: Does this make me gay?

Oh my fucking god. 

Do you like women? 

JJ: Of course 

JJ: Women are awesome 

Do you like men? 

JJ: Apparently 

So…

JJ: Bisexual? 

jj: Wait 

JJ: Isn’t that what Rozanov is?

Yes 

JJ: what the fuck I don’t want to share a sexuality with him 

Jesus Christ. 

Chat with Marly and Rozy Baby 

7:13 AM

Marly: Roz

Marly: Roz

Marly: Roz

Marly: I think I’m bilingual  

It is too early for this shit. 

What the fuck do you mean you THINK you’re bilingual 

Can you speak multiple languages or not 

Marly: no you dumb ass 

Marly: like I like two genders 

I am going to block you. 

That is bisexual 

Marly: oh shit fr?

Jesus Christ. 

Why do you think you are bisexual 

Marly: I slept with a man 

??????

Marly: it was wonderful 

Marly: I ate his ass and it was like

Marly: a whole new pathway of possibilities opened up 

Marly: also I think I inadvertently insulted Hollander’s hole game 

Marly: I’m sorry about that 

Never speak about my husband’s hole again 

That is only for me to speak of 

In your mind he is smooth like Ken doll 

Anyway 

What the fuck 

Who? 

Marly: JJ Boiziau

Are you fucking serious. 

Marly: yes 

Marly: you know

Marly: in a way this is your fault 

How. 

You are forgetting it is cheap to make a pipe bomb. 

Marly: well I mean 

Marly: who started the tradition of Boston players sleeping with Montreal players? 

Marly: hell 

Marly: who MARRIED a Montreal player? 

He is no longer Montreal player

Fuck Montreal

And it is different with me. 

Marly: uh huh

Marly: well it was great 

Marly: I think I want to do it again 

Marly: the sounds he made Roz 

Marly: jesus 

Marly: i’m bricked rn 

Marly 

You know I usually love to hear about how bricked you are 

I do not love hearing about it when it is about Jean Jacques Boiziau 

Marly: I have a question 

I feel like nothing I could say could deter you from asking it

So go ahead 

Marly: how did you know you were bisexual 

Marly: what if I don’t like men I just really like ass 

Is that ass attached to a man 

Marly: yes 

Do you like that that ass is attached to a man? 

Marly: i mean i don’t feel a particular way about it 

So gender does not matter

If they have a good ass, they have a good ass? 

Marly: yeah dude! 

Marly: you get it! 

I believe you are pansexual 

Marly: that's like 

Marly: all genders right?

Marly: not just man and woman

Marly: wait what flag is that 

Why does that matter

[Image of the pansexual flag] 

This is the flag 

Marly: eh 

Marly: what’s the bisexual one 

??? 

[Image of the bisexual flag]

Marly: yeah i’m that one 

Marly: i like the colors better 

I do not think that’s how that works. 

Marly: wow 

Marly: trying to control my sexuality 

Marly: shame on you 

I hate you 

Marly: i love you too 

Marly: should i try to talk to JJ? 

Marly: i don’t think i want this to be a one time thing 

Yes. Definitely talk to him

Do not waste time like me. 

You are already old 

You cannot waste your time

Or you will be like old man Hunter 

And have a hot man beside you and not be able to get your dick up to enjoy him  

Marly: fuck you Roz 

Where is Boiziau?

Marly: beside me?? 

Marly: did you think i would kick him out?? 

Marly: is that how you were moving in the Boston days?? 

Marly: smfh 

You’re telling me instead of talking to the fine piece of ass next to you

You’ve been texting me 

Marly: see even you admit he has a nice ass 

Marly: but yeah 

Marly: we’ve been sitting here in silence 

Marly: i’m pretty sure he’s texting your better half 

He just went on his run 

He can not text and run in his old age 

So he is just standing there  

He could be blowing me right now 

Instead we are both dealing with you two

I am irritated. 

Go make out with Boiziau 

Marly: wait i forgot that’s an option 

Marly: i’m about to go explore the wonders of eating ass again 

Marly: don’t text me for the next 2-4 hours 

Have fun. 

Chat with Shanya 🍑🍑 and Ilyusha ❤️ ❤️ 

7:32 AM 

My love come back 

The idiots have ruined your run 

I know you are just standing there pondering about Boiziau

Shanya 🍑🍑: So Marleau texted you? 

Yes 

He is proudly bilingual now

Shanya 🍑🍑: What? 

Don’t worry about it. 

Come home 😞

Marly is bragging about eating ass to me 

I am feeling left out 

Shanya 🍑🍑: I would rather not have that much information about them.

Poor me 

My husband is standing in short booty shorts 

That ride up his ass 

And I am imaging him 

So lonely 

[Image of a very prominent bulge in Ilya's sleep shorts, his hand just barely ghosting over it] 

See how lonely? 

Shanya 🍑🍑:  Ok fuck. 

Shanya 🍑🍑: I’ll head back. 

I’m so loved 🥰