Chapter 1: Oksana

Chapter 1: Oksana

It starts with a phone call from Svetlana again. Maks is 7, Nicky 5, Natalia not quite a year old. If Shane had to put a name to life, he would call it perfect. He and Ilya are still playing, both still commanding presences on the ice. Shane isn’t afraid to admit that he knows he’s a little slower nowadays. Ilya isn’t. He’s still fast and fierce. But Shane knows they will be talking about retirement sooner rather than later. Probably more for him than Ilya. But Ilya has always said, “We started our careers together, we will end them together.” There’s a sweetness to that that Shane secretly loves. But the problem with the phone call from Svetlana on this day, is that it doesn’t get answered. Svetlana calls during Sunday dinner, after a home game, when Yuna Hollander has a strict rule about no phones at the dinner table. It’s actually the buzz of the gate as they’re finishing up that changes their family again. “Is that Sveta’s car?” Ilya asks as he looks at the gate camera. He presses the button and talks into the speaker. “Da?” “Open the gate,” Svetlana says in Russian. “Fine,” he says back. He pushes the button to open the gate and watches the screen as Svetlana drives in. Shane opens the door to wait for her. She parks and Shane notices she has a passenger. A teenage girl. The girl looks tired, Shane thinks to himself. “Ilya, you better come here,” Shane yells behind him. The girl and Svetlana get out of the car. Shane watches her look around. He sees a nervousness in her. “Hi, Svetlana,” Shane steps to meet her and hugs her. Sveta hugs him back. “Sorry to show up unannounced but neither of you answered your phones. And I brought a guest,” Svetlana says. “Oksana, come.” The girl walks forward and looks him over. She’s pretty, with a nose like Maks and Nicky. He wonders if she smiled, if she would have the same smile as Ilya. She’s wearing ripped jeans and a black sweater with black boots, her curls in a high ponytail. “We’re going to say hi to our favorite tetya,” Ilya comes from behind him with Nicky in his arms. Shane knows the minute he sees Oksana because he puts Nicky down. “Go back in the house, Nikolai.” “But, Papa,” Nicky starts. “Go in, now!” Ilya snaps. He almost never raises his voice at their kids. Neither of them do, really. They can be stern, they discipline, but this is a command. The girl speaks up in Russian. “Is that my brother?” Shane turns to Nicky, whose eyes are startled by Ilya’s reaction. “Go back inside, bub. Tell Nana that Tetya Sveta is here.” Nicky runs back in the house. Svetlana rolls her eyes. “Jesus, Ilya. Scared of a sixteen-year old girl?” She says in Russian. But Shane can almost hear the thoughts in Ilya’s head and he wonders if Ilya's momentarily forgotten that Alexei is dead. Or maybe it’s just having a part of Russia here that instills a fear in him. Whatever it is, Ilya is on high alert. “Why don’t we all go inside?” Shane says. It’s a feeble attempt to try to defuse the situation. He moves towards the teenage girl, Oksana, and puts his hand out. “I’m Shane. I’m married to your Uncle Ilya,” he says in Russian. For a minute the girl doesn’t move, only looks at his outstretched hand. Then she extends her own hand and shakes. “I am Oksana,” she responds in English. Once they all get into the house, Shane leads them into the living room. Oksana and Svetlana sit on one couch while Ilya sits down stiffly on the other. Shane starts to walk to the kitchen but his mom makes her way to them. She’s holding Natalia and watching them intently. “Mom, could you take the kids upstairs for a little bit?” Shane says. His mom doesn’t miss the tension though. “Everything okay, Ilya?” That seems to snap Ilya out of whatever thing he’s feeling. Because he looks up at her. “Yes,” he says. “I think.” Yuna watches them all with a look Shane recognizes as her hockey mom look, the one she gives someone when she’s trying to intimidate them. Then she calls for the boys and carries Natalia up the stairs. Shane takes his seat next to Ilya. “Prosti za moyu reaktsiyu, kogda ya tebya uvidela. Eto bylo prosto neozhidanno. Chto ty zdes' delayesh', Oksana?” Ilya asks. I'm sorry for the way I reacted when I saw you. It was just such a surprise. What are you doing here, Oksana? There’s a moment of quiet for a minute. “I don’t want to go back to Russia, Uncle Ilya,” Oksana says with hard eyes and determination. Shane wonders, not for the first time, if passion and conviction are something of a Rozanov family trait. The look she’s giving them is the same look Maks gives when he doesn't want to eat his broccoli or the same look Ilya used to get when they played for different teams and they faced off. “I can’t go back.” Ilya doesn’t say anything but Shane immediately notices the emphasis she puts on can’t. “Did something happen?” Shane asks her. Oksana looks at Svetlana who nods at her and then turns her full attention to Ilya. “I am maybe more like you than you realize,” she says. “What do you mean?” Ilya asks. “My mother’s husband, he is police. I…” she looks at Svetlana again. Oksana seems genuinely scared and Sveta reaches out to take her hand. “I like boys…but I also like girls. And there was a girl…” Oksana sobs but then looks away. “My mother’s husband caught us and kicked me out. He called me names. He said I was just like my uncle.” “Jesus Christ,” Shane whispers. “But my mother…she said nothing. She just stood there and let him talk to me like that,” Oksana is crying now. Ilya stands up and pulls her to him. He holds her to his chest and Shane watches them. Ilya’s crying too. “I’m so sorry,” Ilya says so softly in Russian. “I’m so so sorry.” Svetlana speaks up. “I always check on her when I go to Moscow and she has my number to call me any time. She called, I came.” “Does her mother know where she is?” Shane asks. He doesn’t really care if she does but he also doesn’t want to be accused of an international kidnapping so he asks the question a little rhetorically. Svetlana nods. “Da, she knows she’s here. I told her I was bringing her to Ilya. I had hoped that she might be able to stay here.” Ilya’s still holding Oksana as he turns to look at Shane. As if he’s expecting Shane to say no. They should talk about it, about what this will mean for their family, for the boys. About all the things. But instead, he says, “Of course.” *** “The boy from earlier,” Oksana says after they’ve sat back down. “He…he is my brother, yes?” Shane takes a breath. But Ilya answers, “Your half-brother, yes.” Oksana sits quietly and Shane sees her eyes fill with tears. “I knew, when Papa died, but Mama would not talk about it.” She sniffs. “I don’t want to hurt him. I just want to know him.” She’s crying again and Ilya gets up. He crouches down in front of her. “You have two brothers. Maksim and Nikolai. And you will know them,” he says. *** Eventually Svetlana says she has to go. Boston is playing in Montreal and she’s driving there. Before she leaves though, they call the boys downstairs. “Tetya Sveta!” Maks literally hops down the stairs to get to her. “Plemyannik Maksim,” Svetalana says. She pulls him into a tight hug. Nicky is behind him and waiting for his turn to hug his aunt. Maks looks at Oksana though. “Who’s she?” “Manners, Maksim,” Shane reminds him. (Maks and Nicky are used to meeting new people, whether it’s fans or players or adults in management. Shane likes to think he and Ilya have taught them how to handle those types of situations.) “Sorry,” Maks says. He walks up to Oksana and puts his hand out. “I’m Maks Hollander- Rozanov. What’s your name?” Oksana takes his hand but looks a little nervous. “My name is Oksana. But you can call me Oksana.” Shane watches as Maks perks up when he hears her accent. “Are you from Russia? My papa’s from Russia! I was born in Russia too!” Oksana is still holding his hand. “I am from Russia.” Then she switches to Russian to ask, “Vy govorite po-russki?” Do you speak Russian? Maks answers back in his best Russian, “YA uchus'. Papa menya uchit.” I am learning. Papa is teaching me. For some reason, in this whole exchange, that’s when Shane’s own tears start. Maybe it’s because of the pride in Maks’s voice, maybe it’s remembering the little tiny two-year old that was in the stroller the day Ilya brought them home. Maybe it’s Shane remembering Maks asking for a sister and Ilya talking about Oksana. But tears start to run down his cheeks. “Moy kotenok,” Ilya murmurs as he kisses his cheek. Maks giggles and looks at Oksana. She asks, “Why did he call him a kitten?” “Because Papa says Daddy looks like an angry kitten when he gets mad,” Maks tells her. Oksana laughs at that. Shane sniffles. “I don’t look like an angry kitten.” “Sure you don’t,” Ilya chuckles. Svetlana says, “Okay, time for me to go. You will be okay, Oksana?” “Da, I think so,” Oksana answers. *** Ilya gets her suitcase from Sveta’s car and they show her to one of the empty guest rooms. “We can decorate it however you want,” Ilya tells her. She just nods. Ilya also tells her they can take her shopping tomorrow to get anything she needs, personal items and clothes. She seems excited about that. Shane tells her he’ll research high schools. She’s less excited about that. They’ve introduced her to the parents and Natalia. Everything goes well. They leave her to get the boys ready for bed. While they change them into pajamas, Ilya explains, as best he can, who Oksana is. He tells them she is their sister from Russia and she will be staying with them now. “Yay!” Nicky says. Shane is sure he has no idea exactly what Ilya means. Maks doesn’t say anything. Then a little later, as Shane is tucking him in, Maks asks, “Daddy?” “Yes, Maks,” Shane responds. Maks is holding his stuffed otter that he sleeps with and he’s tugging at the ears. Shane knows he’s thinking and probably trying to find the best way to ask whatever it is he’s going to ask. “Oksana is my sister?” It comes out more as a question than a statement. “She is,” Shane tells him. Maks is being very thoughtful when he looks up and says,“But she’s old. And I’ve never seen her before. How is she my sister?” Shane takes a deep breath. The boys have a basic understanding of how they came to live with him and Ilya, how they became their sons. But how do you explain generational trauma and government corruption to a seven-year old? “Do you remember how we’ve talked about how you used to live in Russia when you were very little?” Shane starts. Maks nods. “And that papa and daddy have not always been with you? That Papa went to Russia and brought you and Nicky back here to live with us?” “And that I had parents before but they died,” Maks says. “Now I have you and papa.” Shane smiles at that. “Yes, and we love you very much,” he pretends to tickle Maks. “Well, your father, your birth father, Papa’s brother, he was also Oksana’s father.” Maks seems to be taking it in. Then he takes a deep breath. “Is it okay that I don’t want any daddy but you and papa?” “It’s okay,” Shane tells him, running his fingers across Maks’s forehead to move his hair. “But is it okay if I let Oksana be my sister?” Maks asks. Shane smiles at his son. “Of course it is.” Maks lets out a breath. “Good. Because I think she might need a little brother.” *** Oksana fits into the ins and outs of their lives pretty easily. They enroll her in school, which she seems to like. She makes friends easily. She joins a couple clubs. She tells Ilya she’s “talking to” a girl and a boy at school but nothing serious. They meet with immigration services and Ilya officially takes over guardianship of her. Oksana’s also a great skater, though she doesn’t play hockey. She sees a therapist every week, not Galina but another Russian woman who specializes in adolescents. She and Ilya have a good relationship. He sees her with the boys and she’s a good big sister to them, even to Natalia. If he’s honest, though, Shane doesn’t really know how she feels about him. Most of the time it feels like she avoids him. When she is around him, she seems nervous. When they eat dinner as a family, she seems comfortable talking about her day but when Shane asks questions, she goes cold. When he and Ilya drop her off at school, she always gives Ilya a kiss on the cheek and tells him she loves him. If Shane is lucky, he might get a wave (but even that seems like a lot some days). Shane chalks it up to her being a teenager girl. He tries not to take it personally. He asks himself tons of questions about if he’s done something to offend her but he can’t think of what it might be. *** “Fuck, Hollander,” Ilya moans out. They still have victory sex after most wins but some nights, like tonight, that’s blowjobs and handjobs. Shane likes to think he’s perfected the art of blowing Ilya Rozanov after all these years. He knows that moan and the way his hand is gripping Shane’s hair means Ilya is very close and he increases his movements. “Oh, fuck, Shane…” Ilya pushes him off and groans as he releases on his stomach. They both take a minute to catch their breaths. “You didn’t have to do that, I don’t mind you finishing in my mouth,” Shane blushes. Ilya chuckles. “You still blush when you say it.” “Baba!” A tiny voice rings out. “Dada!” Shane and Ilya both groan. “How is she still awake?” Shane asks. Natalia usually sleeps through the night at this point. “It’s probably her teeth,” Ilya says. He throws the blankets off and pulls up his underwear, then reaches for a pair of pajama pants they keep beside the bed for moments like this. “I’ll get her.” Shane decides he’ll check on the boys to make sure Natalia didn’t wake them with her outburst. He peeks in their rooms to find them sleeping soundly. As he walks by Oksana’s room, the door is slightly ajar and he can hear her watching something on her laptop. “The rivalry between Ilya Rozanov and Shane Hollander is legendary. In the same draft class, going #1 and #2, Rozanov to Boston, Hollander to Montreal…” Shane recognizes the audio. It’s from a piece CBS Morning did on them when they expanded the camps to a week in New York. “We were good playing against each other, but nothing beats playing together,” Shane hears himself say. What most people are learning is that the story of Hollander-Rozanov is actually a love story more than a decade in the making.” “We loved each other for a lot longer than people realize, I think,” he hears Ilya say. “We loved each other a lot longer than even we realized, I think,” Shane’s voice says. He remembers the way Ilya was looking at him during the interview, with a sweetness that’s only reserved for him and their children. Shane decides to knock then. “Oksana? Everything okay? Nat didn’t wake you did she?” He hears her close her laptop quickly. “No, is okay. I wasn’t asleep,” she says. Then silence. Shane clears his throat. “Okay, well, um…” He’s not sure what to say. It’s late and she has school tomorrow so he wants to tell her to go to sleep but he feels like Oksana already doesn’t like him so he’s not sure he can tell her to go to sleep. Oksana opens the door then and looks at him. “You and Uncle Ilya, you were together for a long time before you got married. Are you why he never came back to Russia after my grandfather died?” “Yes, probably,” he tells her honestly. “Mostly yes.” Shane pauses. “He and your dad also didn’t—“ “YA znayu o svoyem ottse i Il'ye!” She snaps at him in Russian. I know about my father and Ilya! Shane is taken aback a little. Oksana’s attitude towards him is usually indifference. But this isn’t that, this is anger. “I’m sorry for any part I played in keeping you from seeing your uncle. We spent every moment we weren’t playing, trying to just be together. And then, when we were outed, it wasn’t safe for him to go back,” Shane says as calmly as he can. “I zachem yemu bylo vozvrashchat'sya, yesli u nego uzhe byla novaya sem'ya?” Oksana says before shutting the door. And why would he come back when he had a new family anyway? Shane stands there for a minute. The hockey player in him wants to open the door and tell her it wasn’t that simple, to chirp back. But the part that is trying hard to build a relationship with Ilya’s niece tells him that’s probably not a good idea. So he leaves it. He goes back their bedroom to find Ilya sitting up, Natalia laying in the spot between them with a teething ring in her mouth and stuffed kitten in her arms. “I thought it would be easier,” Ilya says, motioning to Natalia. Shane nods. But Ilya knows him too well. “Hey, what’s wrong?” Shane climbs into his spot on the bed, shaking his head as he pulls the covers up. “Talk to me, sweetheart.” “I don’t think Oksana likes me very much,” Shane says. “Why do you think that?” Ilya asks. “She’s never said anything to me.” Shane sighs. He doesn’t want to tell him about the conversation he just had with Oksana. Instead, he said, “It’s just a feeling.” “Do you want me to talk to her?” Ilya asks. “No,” Shane says as he settles into his spot. “It’ll be fine.”

Chapter 2: Injuries and All-Stars

Chapter Summary “I will tell them I can’t go,” Ilya says. “You’re still in a brace and I won’t go without you.” But Shane knows very well this might be the last All-Star Game either of them play in. “No, we’ll all go. We can take the kids and make it a family vacation.” Ilya looks at him and laughs. “Family vacation? Okay.”

Chapter Notes

Thank you all that read and left comments on the last chapter! This chapter focuses on building family and introduces a new character. There’s also a callback to one of my favorite scenes in the Game Changers series: Ilya at the pool. See the end of the chapter for more notes Injuries and All-Stars A week later, the entire family is coming to the game. They’re playing New York for the first time since Scott Hunter retired and joined the coaching staff of the Admirals. Shane and Ilya leave early, with Yuna and David bringing the kids. Maks, Nicky, and Natalia wear jerseys that say Hollander-Rozanov on them. Oksana wears a Rozanov #81 jersey. Shane figures that’s accurate though, she is a Rozanov. They skate to the plexiglass before warm-ups to say hi and the kids show them the signs they made. Oksana waves to Ilya but doesn’t really look at Shane. It’s a great game. The Centaurs are up 3-1 at the end of the second period. Shane has been hit into the boards probably a million times in his career. But this time, when the Admirals’ player hits him, he feels something pop in his knee. It’s a different kind of pain than anything he’s felt when he’s been injured previously. He knows that something has happened. “Are you okay?” Ilya asks. “I don’t think so,” Shane tells him. “Fuck!” “What hurts?” Ilya asks. Shane can tell he’s trying not to hover. They are good at keeping things professional on the ice. But right now, Shane could give a fuck about professional. He wants his husband’s comfort. “My knee,” Shane answers. It’s different than the previous injuries he’s experienced on the ice. He doesn’t have to be carted off on a stretcher. He’s just brought to the tunnel and then taken to the hospital. Ilya tries to go with him but Shane tells him to stay. An MRI reveals a very sprained MCL. “It’s not torn yet,” the doctor says. “Yet is the key word, Mr. Hollander. If you try to exert yourself too much, it will.” He’s given strict instructions to keep his knee elevated. He’s supposed to alternate heat and cold. He also alternates between their bed and the couch. It’s hard though because the kids don’t seem to understand that Daddy can’t do much. He’s still a jungle gym for Natalia, who crawls all over him. But he can’t skate with the boys or go with them to take Anya for a walk. Which is where Ilya is now, with the kids, walking Anya. But Shane is about an hour past when he should have taken a pain pill. And the pain is starting to sit in. He’s propped up in the couch and reaches for his phone on the coffee table to text Ilya. It couldn’t be that easy though. He knocks it on the floor, just out of reach. “Fuck,” Shane says. Oksana comes into the room then. “Are you okay?” She asks. Shane is briefly taken aback by her sincerity. She sounds like she cares. “I’m fine. I just need to text Ilya and see if they’re headed back.” “I can help. What do you need?” She asks. “No, it’s okay. I can wait for Ilya,” Shane tells her. “No, I can help,” Oksana says. Shane moves in his seat. “Could you grab the pill bottle in the cabinet? It’s on the top shelf. Please.” “Sure,” Oksana answers. She’s gone for a minute and then comes back with the pill bottle and a glass of water. “I will put it back when you are finished. Don’t want the babies to get it.” Shane chuckles. “Don’t let Nicky hear you call him a baby. He thinks he’s much more grown up than he really is.” “Hmmm,” she sighs. She sits on the couch across from him as he fiddles with the bottle and takes out a pill. He swallows it along with most of the water in the glass. She picks up his phone and sets it back on the table. Then, Oksana just looks at him. He knows she wants to ask something. He wonders if she’s waiting for permission. Finally, she asks, “What were they like when they came here? My brothers?” Shane takes another drink of water and then Oksana reaches for his glass and pill bottle. “Nicky was very little. He doesn’t remember anything about Russia.” “About our father?” she asks. “Yes,” Shane answers. “Or his mother or anything really. He just kind of slid into life here. But Maks…” Shane thinks about the little boy he picked up at the airport. “He remembered some things. He had nightmares for a little bit. Sometimes the only thing I could do was hold him and sing terrible French lullabies to calm him.” “Our father,” Oksana starts. “He was not a good person. He was not good to me, to my mother, to Uncle Ilya. I am sometimes jealous that the boys do not remember him because I wish I could not remember him either.” Shane wants to reach out a hand to her and comfort her in some way. He knows he’s not known for being affectionate with anyone but Ilya and their kids. But he’s not sure if Oksana would even take it. As soon as he gathers the courage to try, the door opens. “We are back!” Ilya’s voice says from the entry way. “Daddy, we saw three bunnies! And Anya tried to chase them!” Nicky says. Shane chuckles. “But she did not, she was the best girl and stayed right with us,” Ilya says. Shane looks back to where Oksana was only to find her seat empty. “Oh shit,” Ilya says. “I forgot about your pill.” He leans down to kiss Shane. “It’s okay, Oksana got it for me,” Shane explains. He doesn’t miss the way Ilya smiles at that. *** It’s a few weeks later when the All-Star list comes out. Ilya’s on it. Shane is still injured. Now he’s in a brace and can walk a little. But he’s still not able to play. “I will tell them I can’t go,” Ilya says. “You’re still in a brace and I won’t go without you.” But Shane knows very well this might be the last All-Star Game either of them play in. “No, we’ll all go. We can take the kids and make it a family vacation.” Ilya looks at him and laughs. “Family vacation? Okay.” *** There are three rooms in the suite Ilya books in Los Angeles. One for Ilya and Shane (and likely Natalia), one for Maks and Nicky, and one for Oksana. They will all miss school for a few days but it’s worth it to get to be together as a family. And nothing is more fun than three kids, a teenager, and two hockey players on an airplane flying into another country. They are a mess of passports and luggage but even in the chaos, they are a family. *** Shane feels a little bit of deja vu as he watches Ilya in the pool with the boys and Oksana. It’s different though too. This time he’s sitting in a lounge chair under an umbrella with Natalia as she naps in his arms. His braced knee is elevated. He’s jealous that he can’t join them but also loves having the chance to watch Ilya be Papa. “Okay, if you win, I will buy you all candy bars from the machine inside,” Ilya says. It’s so reminiscent of another All-Star Game from what feels like ages ago. “Hollander! Make sure none of these cheaters cheat!” Shane chuckles and gives him a thumbs up. “Okay.” Then Ilya winks at him and dammit if Shane’s heart doesn’t speed up. “On your mark…get set…go!” Ilya says. They take off. Shane knows exactly what Ilya’s going to do, and he’s right, as he acts like he’s being attacked by a shark. Oksana stops and glances over to look at him before she starts to laugh. But Maks and Nicky know their Papa too well and they keep up the race. Nicky is faster than Maks though and he wins by at least a foot. Shane lays Natalia down gently on the chair as he stands up to help the boys out of the pool. “Daddy!” Nicky raises his hands for Shane to pull him out of the pool. “I won! I won!” Shane pulls him out and Nicky jumps up and down. “I won!” Shane can’t help but chuckle and then Nicky is hugging him. He’s dripping wet and now Shane is too but he’s so excited. “Good job, bub! You’re so fast!” Shane says hugging his son tighter. Maks is getting out of the pool too with a slightly dejected look on his face. “And you too, Maks! You beat Papa!” “He faked a shark attack,” Maks says very seriously, with no time for the tomfoolery of Ilya Rozanov. “I think you would have beaten him anyway,” Oksana adds. She’s gotten out of the pool and wrapped herself in a towel. She’s holding an empty towel for Maks who sighs as she gently puts it on his shoulders. “Besides, we get candy.” Nicky starts to jump up and down again. “Candy! Candy! Candy!” “Hollander, I don’t have my wallet…” Ilya pulls himself out of the pool. Deja vu indeed. *** “Daddy? Are you wearing a Rozanov jersey too?” Maks asks. It almost never happens that Shane gets to wear his husband’s name and number to a hockey event. Usually he’s playing in the same events. But today is an exception and he is very proud to be displaying Ilya’s name on his back. He gets to just be Shane Hollander-Rozanov, Ilya’s husband. “I am,” Shane answers. “We all match!” Maks is so excited as he says it. “That never happens!” Shane, the boys, Natalia, and Oksana are all wearing Ottawa jerseys with the name Rozanov and the number 81 on them. They’re standing in front of the mirror in the bathroom of the suite. “But, Daddy,” Nicky starts. “Why aren’t you wearing your jersey?” Shane puts hair gel in his palm and then fixes Nicky’s curls. Ilya’s better at it but Shane’s learning. “Because tonight, I am not the important one. Tonight I get to be Maks, Nicky, and Natalia’s Daddy and I get to be Papa’s husband. That’s something I’m pretty proud of, yeah?” “We’re proud of you too, Daddy. Even if you can’t play with Papa and Uncle Troy tonight,” Maks tells him. Shane smiles. “Thanks, buddy.” He claps his hands together. “Now, should we go get Nat ready?” The boys take off and run to the suite’s living area. Where Oksana sits with Natalia in her lap. She’s already dressed her. The Rozanov jersey, a little tutu skirt. And now Oksana is putting her black curls into little balls on top of her head, each tied with a bow. Shane is much better at doing Natalia’s hair than Ilya is. Ilya is better at picking out clothes for her. But neither of them could have made her look as adorable as she does right now. “Thank you, Oksana,” Shane says. “Of course,” Oksana puts Natalia down and Nat stands on unsteady feet but smiles wide at him. “I had a little sister back home. My mom and her new husband.” This is new information to Shane. He assumes that Ilya must have known but never mentioned it. “What’s her name?” He asks her. “Katerina,” Oksana says. “But I call her Katya. She was two when I left. Interesno, uvizhu li ya yeyo kogda-nibud' snova.” I wonder if I will ever see her again. She says it with such a sadness. It’s the same sadness he hears in Ilya’s voice when he’s had a little too much vodka and starts to talk about his lost home. “Nat can be your sister too,” Maks says. “We can share.” Oksana gives him a small smile. “Spasibo, Maksim.” *** All-Star Games are fun because they are extremely low stakes and, as a player, you get to play with other players you might never get the chance to play with. A lot of the greats that they started with have retired. There’s no Scott Hunter anymore. Instead they’ve been replaced by Troy Barrett (who the boys call Uncle Troy) and kids that like to remind Shane and Ilya they had their posters on their walls growing up. Which is an honor but also a reminder that they are getting old, and, more crushingly, that they are replaceable. Their seats are next to Harris and the Barrett-Drover twins, Ethan and Eleanore, who are slightly older than Natalia. Troy’s mom is there too to help rein in the toddlers. This year, the league is featuring players from the women’s league too. Shane wants to believe that it’s being done with the best of intentions and not because they’re trying to cover their ass in some way. The women won’t play in the actual game but they will participate in some of the skills competitions. “There’s a Russian-American woman doing the speed competition,” Harris tells points to one of the young female players who’s skating in the speed competition. “Tatiana Mikhailova.” “Oh, yeah,” Shane remembers. “Plays for the Toronto Monarchs, right?” “Looks like she just turned 18 last week,” Harris says. “These new players make me feel old.” Shane laughs. Shane sees Ilya talking to the girl and then motions for her to follow him as he skates to the glass. “Moya sem'ya,” Shane hears Ilya say. My family. “Papa! Papa!” Maks and Nicky both jump up and down and Shane bounces Natalia. Shane can’t quite hear what he’s saying but he assumes Ilya is introducing them all. Tatiana nods along until Ilya gets to Oksana. Then she smiles and gives her a sweet wave. And for the first time since she arrived, Oksana gives a genuine smile back. Not even the smiles she gives Ilya or the boys are that bright. Shane looks at Ilya, who seems oblivious to what just happened. Harris isn’t though. He chuckles. “I’m not old enough to parent a teenager,” Shane says. The kid is as fast as Shane and Ilya once were. It’s incredible to watch. If she were a man, she would have a multi-million dollar contract and endorsement deals. But Shane knows that hockey doesn’t work the same for women as men. Shane imagines if she were a man, people would talk about Mikhailova for years. Like they once talked about him and Ilya. *** They have a tradition after All-Star games to eat dinner together as a family. This year looks different, for obvious reasons. Shane has promised the kids pizza (against his better judgment). While Shane and Oksana have corralled the kids to the vehicle, Ilya texts. He’s bringing Tatiana with him back to their suite for dinner. Shane shouldn’t be surprised. Ilya is good at helping young players find their way. Especially a female playing with a Russian background. Oksana helps Shane get the boys and Natalia cleaned up but they stay in their jerseys. Shane orders food and before long, he hears the beep of the key card. For just a moment, Shane thinks of all the hotel rooms they would sneak in and out of not so long ago. Sometimes it feels like forever ago and others like yesterday. “Family! Your papa is home!” Ilya says from the door. Shane hears him drop his bag and then the patter of feet as Maks and Nicky run from their room. Oksana is sitting on the sofa in the lounge area and she gets up too. “Papa! Look! We are all matching! We all wore your name and number! Even Daddy!” Nicky jumps into Ilya’s arms. Ilya’s crooked grin comes alive as Shane greets him with Natalia in his arms. “I see that,” Ilya says. He leans in and gives Shane a kiss before going to his ear to whisper, “I think I need you to leave that on all night.” And Shane knows he’s blushing. “Good game, Captain,” Shane says as he leans in for another kiss, which Ilya plants gently on his lips. Ilya motions for the teenager behind him to come forward. “Tatiana Mikhailova, poznakom’tes’, eto moy muzh, Sheyn,” Ilya formally introduces Shane to Tatiana as his husband. “Mr. Hollander,” Tatiana says. Shane notices that she’s almost as tall as Ilya and Shane chuckles at that. Was he really that old? That he was Mr. Hollander? “Sheyn,” he tries to gently correct him. Ilya puts Nicky down and tells the boys, “Tatiana speaks English but I know she misses Russian so we will speak both, da?” “Da,” Maks says. Ilya takes a minute to reintroduce Maks, Nicky, and Natalia, now that they aren’t separated by the plexiglass of the rink. Then Oksana moves and introduces herself. It’s clear that she and Tatiana are both happy to have another Russian teenager to talk to. He sees both of them light up a little as they converse and he doesn’t miss the occasional pink blush on Oksana’s cheeks. Shane takes that opportunity to pull Ilya to the kitchen area. “The kids wanted pizza,” Shane tells him. He passes Natalia to his arms and the little girl squeals as Ilya peppers her cheeks with kisses. “And you ordered yourself a salad?” Ilya says. “You know I did but I’ll probably have a slice of pizza too,” Shane tells him. Ilya kisses him again. “My wild husband!” Shane is stealthily watching Oksana and Tatiana talk while Ilya seems to be oblivious. He knows it’s probably not his place to even care but Shane can’t help it. He remembers what he was like as a teenager. He remembers a certain rink parking lot, a certain hotel gym, a certain locker room shower. Shane isn’t assuming every teenager is what he was when he was a teen. He just knows that Oksana is their family and she needs them to look out for her. Tatiana is good with the kids too. She helps Nicky open his water bottle as they eat dinner. She helps him pull the pepperonis off a slice that Nicky says, “has too many”. Maks asks her a thousand questions about everything: Russia, America, hockey, dinosaurs. And the kid takes it all in stride. She answers politely and in a way most rookies wouldn’t. Shane knows that the Hollander-Rozanovs can be a lot. But Tatiana seems comfortable with their brand of chaos. Shane tries not to ask too many questions on his own but he does anyway. He asks Tatiana about her family and finds out they are from an area near where Ilya grew up in Moscow. She moved to Minnesota with an aunt when she was 13. She is the youngest of 7 children. Her oldest sister lives in the Netherlands but all of her other siblings live near his parents. Shane can tell she is very serious but probably has a fun streak when she’s not with geriatric hockey players. Shane also doesn’t miss Tatiana and Oksana exchanging phone numbers before Tatiana leaves for the evening. “Tatiana, she is a good kid, no?” Ilya asks. Shane nods. “She seems like it.” “I remember how hard it was to be so far from home without family. There are not many Russians in the PWHL and I think she is also lonely in Toronto. I would like us to help her when we can,” Ilya says. Shane slides into the bed and gently rubs at his knee. He pulls the covers up. Natalia is already asleep in the space between them. “I think that’s a good idea,” he says. Ilya takes his spot on the other side of the bed. “Is she okay…with us?” “What do you mean?” Ilya asks. Shane sighs. “Is she okay with us being married? You know, being raised in Russia, I didn’t know how much she would think that maybe…” Ilya gets it then. “You mean because you are gay?” “Oh my God, Ilya. You know what I mean,” Shane tries not to snap. “And you’re married to me, a man, so…” Ilya laughs. “I’m only joking, moya lyubov'.” He leans across Natalia and kisses his cheek. “She is fine with it. The PWHL is not so worried about that kind of thing. And she is young. I have hope that the younger generation of Russians, they will be more accepting. Maybe one day, yeah?” Shane nods. “I do like her but I think we should keep an eye on her and Oksana.” “Why?” Ilya acts surprised. “Did you not see them tonight? I think at one point we could have gone to bed and turned the lights out and they wouldn’t even have noticed. I think they like each other,” Shane told him. “They are teenagers. They just like having other teenagers to talk to,” his sweet, naive husband says. “Ilya, do you remember what we were doing when we were 17 and 18?” Shane asks. It’s like a lightbulb goes off in his husband’s head. “Oh,” Ilya says. “You are right. From now on, we both keep eyes on them.” “Agreed,” Shane says. He looks down at the sleeping baby between them. Then back at Ilya. “I’m sorry I didn’t get to wear the jersey for you now. But it’s hard to be upset when we have this.” Ilya ran his fingers through Natalia’s curls. “We are very lucky.” Then he looks back at Shane. “You will just have to wear the jersey when we get home.” Shane laughs, thinking about maneuvering through the airport. “If we survive the return trip.”

Chapter End Notes

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Chapter 3: Growth

Chapter Summary She leaves but passes Ilya on the way. “Net, etogo ne proiskhodit,” Ilya says. No, this is not happening. Shane laughs. He opens his arms for Ilya who groans as he hugs Shane. “She’s 17 and I feel like I am just getting to be part of her life again.”

Chapter Notes

Thank you to those who are continuing on the journey! Just the epilogue left. See the end of the chapter for more notes Growth They do, in fact, survive the return trip. Shane is cleared a week later to return to play. Just in time for the Centaurs to take on Toronto in Ottawa. The day before the Centaurs take on the Guardians, the PWHL Toronto Monarchs are playing the Ottawa Oracles. The Hollander- Rozanovs are in attendance. They try to be discreet about their attendance but when the Jumbotron camera finds them, Ilya and Shane both wave. They’re wearing Centaurs gear because they can’t be seen being anything but cheering for their hometown. Nicky, however, begs them to buy him a Tatiana Mikhailova jersey when they get home and they pick up a few posters the PWHL is giving away of players from both teams (including one of Tatiana). When the game is over, Ilya and Shane take the kids down to the locker rooms to meet a few of the players. It’s still a professional atmosphere but the women are happy to sign the posters, talk to the kids, hear Nicky’s personal commentary on their performances. Ilya invites Tatiana over for dinner after the exhibition. They’ve invited Wyatt, Lisa, and Diana over too. As they’re leaving, the coach for the Oracles catches them. She’s a tall woman with her blonde hair pulled into a slick ponytail, wearing a tailored white suit. Chelsea VanGarten, that’s her name, and Shane vaguely remembers watching her play for Canada in the Olympics in Sochi. She’s obviously older now. “I wanted to thank you both for coming and bringing your family. I think your presence here was really important,” Chelsea says. “Was fun. Our kids love to watch hockey, doesn’t matter who’s playing,” Ilya tells her. “No, I don’t think you understand what I’m trying to say,” Chelsea explains. “You, two Stanley Cup champions, two of the best players in the MLH, were seen at a PWHL game. People who maybe wouldn’t watch us or attend will say ‘But Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov were there so it has to be cool'." Shane chuckles and looks at Ilya. “I think you’re overestimating the influence we have on people.” Chelsea grins. “Am I? My ten-year old son only uses Renfrew stick tape because that’s what Shane Hollander uses.” She turns to Ilya. “And my husband, he’s an Olympic curler, he refuses to drink anything but expensive Russian vodka because he heard Ilya Rozanov say in an interview that it was the best.” She smiles at the kids then. “And you brought your sons, which makes it more likely that men will let their sons watch. Your presence makes a difference. So thank you. And if you ever want tickets to come again, let me know.” They thank her and the boys give her high-fives before she walks back to the locker room. “Is good we came,” Oksana says. “You always say you want to change things. This was a good idea.” *** Shane and Ilya work together to make spaghetti and meatballs, while Oksana and the boys bake Kurabie biscuits (butter cookies with jam in the middle). She is so very patient with them as she shows them how to put the jam in the center. And Maks hugs her when she praises him. It feels a little like she’s just always been there now. Wyatt’s going to pick Tatiana up from her hotel in the city after she’s changed and showered from the game and bring her to their house. “Uncle Hazy!” Maks says when Wyatt and his family arrive. “Maximus Decimus Meridius,” Wyatt says, which causes Maks to break out in giggles. Wyatt’s carrying Diana, Lisa behind him with the diaper bag. “We also brought wine and ginger ale,” Lisa says. “Not for you, Shane, for the kids.” “Thanks for having us over,” Wyatt says. “We told you we would be the best Canadian-Russian godfather,” Ilya says like it’s just a fact. “And with Tatiana, Diana will have another Russian friend.” Ilya holds his arms out and Wyatt transfers the baby to them. Oksana comes to stand behind him and looks at the baby. “Privet, malysh,” Oksana says. Hello, baby. Then Tatiana steps in the door. She’s holding a large bouquet of beautiful flowers. And, at first, Shane thinks maybe she brought them for them but Oksana steps up to her and Tatiana passes the flowers to her. Shane looks at Ilya just as Oksana stands on her tiptoes to place a kiss on Tatiana’s cheek. “Okay, okay,” Ilya passes Diana back to Wyatt. “Oksana, let’s find a vase for your flowers, okay?” Shane pulls Oksana along to the kitchen. He isn’t sure how much of a parent he’s supposed to be at the moment. He goes into the pantry to grab a vase and comes back to find Oksana staring at the bouquet. “They’re very pretty flowers.” “Da,” she says. “Tatiana is very kind. It’s good to have someone to talk to.” “You know you can always talk to Ilya and me,” Shane says as he fills the vase with water and then takes the bouquet to put in the vase. “Is different. With Tati. We have been texting,” Oksana says. “I…I think I like her. But I don’t know yet.” “You don’t have to know yet. Enjoy just talking until you do know,” Shane tells her. “You know that your Uncle and I met when we were very young. We didn’t know it was more for years.” “Hmmm,” Oksana sighs. “Can I take these to my room?” “Of course,” Shane tells her. She leaves but passes Ilya on the way. “Net, etogo ne proiskhodit,” Ilya says. No, this is not happening. Shane laughs. He opens his arms for Ilya who groans as he hugs Shane. “She’s 17 and I feel like I am just getting to be part of her life again.” “Ilya, it’s going to be okay,” Shane says. “They’re just talking.” “We just talked too,” Ilya says. “And then we fucked in half the hotel rooms in North America.” Shane laughs at that too. “I don’t think it was half the hotel rooms in North America.” He runs his fingers through Ilya’s curls. “There was also your house in Boston, my building in Montreal. Does Tatiana have her own apartment in Toronto?” “You’re not helping, moya lyubov',” Ilya groans. Oksana might still be warming to Shane but Shane knew she was going to be okay. “She’s a good kid, Ilya. She’ll be fine,” Shane says. Ilya doesn’t have time to respond. Oksana pops her head in the kitchen, “The boys are wondering if it’s time to eat. Well, mainly Nicky.” He and Ilya both laugh at that. “Tell them we’re working on it,” Ilya says. They work together to put the food out on the counter, buffet style. When they return to their guests, Shane is surprised to see Tatiana holding Diana. “I have many, uh, plemyannitsy i plemyanniki,” Tatiana says. “Nieces and nephews,” Ilya translates. Wyatt’s on the floor with the boys building some monstrosity with legos. “I bet you miss them,” he says. “I do,” Tatiana answers. “I haven’t been back to Russia since I was 13. My oldest sister, Olga, she lives in Amsterdam and she has visited me. But my parents have not.” Shane wonders if what she’s saying is that they will not. “How did you end up in Minnesota?” Lisa asks. “Hmmm,” Tatiana looks like she’s contemplating how to explain it. “I was very good at hockey from when I was very young. But there was not really a future for that in Russia.” She moves her eyes to Oksana, then to Shane and Ilya. “There was not a future for me for a lot of reasons. And my aunt loves me enough to fight for me to have a future.” There is an unspoken admission there. That, like Oksana, Tatiana’s parents wouldn’t or couldn’t stand by her. “I was born in Russia,” Nicky says, casually, with such an innocence. “But I don’t remember it. I only remember Canada and I think it’s pretty good. Maybe you’ll think it’s good too, Tati.” Everyone takes a beat to stare at the now six-year old as he tries to twirl spaghetti noodles onto his fork. He’s oblivious to the seriousness of the conversation. And maybe that’s a good thing. “I think it is good, Nikolai,” Tatiana smiles at him. Wyatt clears his throat. “How is Toronto?” Tatiana shrugs. “There are no Russians on my team but the girls on the team are nice. Nicer than the men’s team. Whenever we have to do events with them, it is not fun. If I had a loon for every time one of the players had told me to go back to the kitchen or to do his laundry. Or worse.” Shane thinks about this. It’s been almost a decade since Dallas Kent but Toronto’s reputation never really recovered. They also never really tried to recover because they never addressed the problem. They assumed with Kent gone, everything was fabulous. But they didn’t realize they had other assholes on their team. It’s sad for players who care but Shane can’t help but think Toronto dug their own grave. “What’s sad is that they do not realize that women can do both. Julie Carmichael, one of our wings, had a baby last season. Just because she is a mom doesn’t mean she can’t be a hockey player too,” Tatiana adds. Wyatt claps his hands. “Well said! You know, I should hook you up with Ryan and Fabian. They aren’t Russian but they’re friendly,” Wyatt tells him. “They are like Shane and me,” Ilya says. He leans over and kisses Shane’s cheek dramatically, making him blush. “But we are sexier.” “Ew,” Oksana says, earning a laugh from everyone. *** It’s a rare occasion that their “fancy” (according to Nicky) dining room gets used for dinner. Shane always thinks it feels cold and impersonal. But with the number of guests, there’s not room in the breakfast nook they usually eat at and it’s too cold for dinner on the patio. The guests tonight also make the space feel warm and familiar. And, not for the first time, Shane is thankful for the Hayes family. “Do your children play?” Tatiana asks Shane. “Nothing serious yet but Wyatt works with Maks occasionally,” Shane tells him. “He wants to be a goalie,” Ilya adds. “If I have anything to do with it, Maks is going to be the best goalie in the league in 20 years. Right, Maks?” Wyatt pats Maks gently on the back. “Yep,” Maks says. “And I’ll be the fastest player ever!” Nicky says, not to be left out. Shane and Ilya laugh but Tatiana looks serious. “Maybe one day I can skate with you?” “Really?” Nicky’s excitement is evident. “Yes,” Tatiana says. “I can be fast too.” Wyatt chuckles. “Probably a good idea since your dads are both too old to be much competition.” “And here I thought I liked you, Hazy,” Ilya smirks. “And Natalia? Will she play?” Tatiana asks. Shane looks at the little girl in her high chair. She’s picking apart her meatball and sucking tomato sauce off her fingers. “We’ve taken her on the ice. She can’t walk yet but if Ilya or I hold her hands, she glides pretty well. But we’ve always said, with all of the kids, they can decide what they want to do.” “I am glad she will have the same choice as her brothers though. Most dads would not let their daughters choose,” Tatiana says. “They would either make them play or not give them the chance.” Ilya leans over and puts his arm around the back of Shane’s chair. “We are not most dads and we are not most families.” *** When the evening winds down and it’s time for their guests to leave, Ilya smooches both of Diana’s cheeks before putting her in her car seat. Maks and Nicky hug Wyatt and Lisa and then Tatiana. “Thank you for inviting me,” Tatiana says as she shakes Shane’s hand. “You’re always welcome here,” Shane tells her. He hopes Tatiana can infer the seriousness in his voice. He truly means it. Shane knows that women’s hockey is a bit more inclusive. But if he and Ilya and Ryan and Scott and Troy want to change the environment of major league hockey, it has to include the female players. He wants Tatiana to know there can be family within the game. Especially after hearing her talk about her experience with the men on the Toronto team. Oksana is standing a little to the side. He thinks she might want a moment alone with Tatiana. He pulls Ilya and the boys back. “Let’s give them a moment, yeah?” Shane whispers to Ilya. “My budem sledit' za situatsiyey,” Ilya says. We will be watching though. And they do watch. Shane and Ilya stand inside the doorway, trying to give them privacy. But also really wanting to make sure nothing untoward happens. “You know we will have to do this with Natalia one day too,” Shane says as they watch the teenagers talk. “And Maks and Nicky. This is really just the beginning.” Ilya groans. “Don’t remind me.” *** Shane isn’t sure what it is that wakes him up that night but once he’s awake, he can’t go back to sleep. He knows it’s early, maybe one in the morning. These moods usually result in a workout or incessantly watching game film. Not wanting to wake Ilya, he pulls on the pajama pants next to the bed and an old t-shirt. He decides to go with game film but as he leaves their bedroom, Shane hears noise coming from Oksana’s room. Talking. He makes his way towards her room and notices the door open. He can see light from her bedside lamp seeping into the hallway. “I know you have Canadian citizenship now but there’s been a lot of talk about Russian politics and your sexuality. It can’t be easy to know you can’t go home again.” “I know I can never go back to Russia,” he hears Ilya’s voice say. “And that makes me a little sad. I don’t think of Russia as my home anymore anyway. My home is Shane and our kids. And I think about when we were in Roger Crowell’s office and he told us to choose each other or choose hockey, Shane did not hesitate. He chose me. We choose each other every day. I am proud to be Russian, but I am prouder to be Shane Hollander’s husband.” It’s the same CBS Morning feature he’d found her watching before. Shane wonders if she fell asleep watching it. He knocks gently and finds her sitting up in bed with her laptop. “Everything okay?” Shane asks her. Oksana nods, then closes. “I like to watch this when I can’t sleep.” Shane laughs as he leans against the doorframe. “Is that a joke about me being boring?” “No,” Oksana is serious when she says it. “I watch it because it makes me feel safe.” She moves forward to the end of the bed. Her feet are hanging off the edge and when she looks up at him, she has tears in her eyes. “After you married Uncle Ilya, people made it sound like you were the reason he could never come back to Russia. I was told that you were like…the devil, like boogeyman,” she says. “But I don’t think you are.” The tears start to fall then. “I think you love my uncle very much and I think you love my brothers very much. I don’t think someone who loves like that could be anything but good.” She looks down and lets out a sob. “In my whole life, I have never felt more loved than here with you and Uncle Ilya. And I hope someday you will love me like a daughter too.” Shane moves and kneels down in front of her and he opens his arms for her. She hugs him so tightly, like Maks does when he got in trouble at school for fighting and needed Shane’s reassurance that his dads still loved him. Or when Nicky falls hard on the ice and needs to know he’s okay. Or when Natalia falls hard her bottom with her unsteady feet and needs Daddy to hold her. It’s the type of hug he’s given his own mother a million times. It’s the type of tight hug a child gives their parents when they need to know they are loved. And so, like a parent, he hugs her back. He doesn’t say anything for a little while. He lets her cry and hugs her. Shane finally pulls back to look at her. Her eyes are red and her tears are still falling. He wipes the tears from her cheeks. “Spasibo,” she says very quietly. Thank you. Shane shakes his head. “You don’t have to thank me, Oksana. You are the best big sister to Maks and Nicky and even Natalia. Our family was not complete until you joined it. You are important to us and we love you.” She hugs him tightly again. “YA tozhe vas vsekh lyublyu.” I love you all too. Shane sits with her for a minute or two more before she says she’s okay and ready to sleep. He hugs her again and kisses her hair, then gets up and shuts the door on his way out. Ilya is standing in the hallway. His own eyes are red and he sniffles. “You were not in bed,” he says. This time it’s Ilya’s arms that are open and Shane finds his way into them. Ilya is his safe space, his home, his strength. He’s the place where Shane can let down his walls and he does. Ilya kisses his hair and tucks his head under his chin. “It is an amazing thing to be loved by you, Shane Hollander. Your love, it transforms.” Shane holds onto Ilya. “Is a good thing the boring freckled hockey player decided to introduce himself to me. I could never have dreamed this life. Our sons and our daughters. But I will always be grateful for it.” Shane pulls back then. “I wouldn’t have any of this without you. The boys, Nat, Oksana. We built this together.” “Ya tebya lyublyu,” Ilya says. Shane goes back into his arms. “I love you too, so much.”

Chapter End Notes

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Chapter 4: The Sweetest Victory

Chapter Summary Oksana officially becomes part of the Hollander-Rozanov family.

Chapter Notes

Hi everyone! Thank you so much for your response to the last chapter! I really appreciate it. I upped the chapter count by one because as I was writing, this chapter got a little long. The Sweetest Victory When Oksana is beginning Grade 12, she asks to speak to Shane and Ilya after the little ones have gone to bed. She’s very formal about it. Sitting them down at the dining room table. She wrings her hands and takes a deep breath. “I want to ask for something but it is very big,” she finally says. “I have already told you we will get you a car for graduation,” Ilya says. Oksana shakes her head. “No, it is not that. It’s something else.”Shane can tell she’s nervous. “You also cannot go overnight to Toronto, no matter how much we like Tatiana,” Ilya says. (Something that had been a point of contention between Oksana and her father figures. She may be almost 18 but overnight trips to her girlfriend’s was a no-go.) “No, it isn’t that either,” she says. “Why don’t you just ask, Oksana?” Shane says. She takes another deep breath. “I have always said that I did not feel like I had a home until I came here. I love being a big sister and being your daughter. I wanted to know if I could officially be your daughter. If you might adopt me.” She says it very quickly and neither Shane and Ilya respond. “It’s just that when I graduate, I want them to call my name as Hollander-Rozanov. I want to be the same as Maks and Nicky and Nat. I want to be your daughter.” There’s a realization in Shane’s mind at that moment. Oksana was choosing them. They had created a space for her and she had decided that was home. Knowing that, that was just as important as every win and every trophy. Shane stands up and walks around to where Oksana is sitting. He pulls her up to hug her. Then he looks at Ilya who joins them. They're wrapped in a group hug. “Just so you know, you’re already our daughter,” Shane says. “Does that mean yes?” Oksana voice is wet. “Da,” Shane answers. “Yes.” The next day Ilya calls their attorney and they begin the process of adoption. It’s different than with the boys and Natalia. Maybe it’s because she’s older or because she’s able to articulate more of what she wants. Ilya technically already has guardianship of her. With Oksana, it is a matter of paperwork and waiting. Just before the adoption is finalized, Ilya receives a phone call from Oksana’s mother. It comes in the middle of the night and Shane watches Ilya pace back and forth, listening to the woman on the other end, as he does his best to control his temper. “Ty pozvolila svoyemu muzhu obrashchat'sya s ney kak s musorom. Ty stoyala i nichego ne delala. Ty yeyo ne zasluzhivayesh',” Ilya speaks through his teeth. You let your husband treat her like garbage. You stood and did nothing.You don’t deserve her. Shane doesn’t hear the response on the other end of the line. He just sees Ilya growl and throw the phone on the bed. The call isn’t disconnected though and the woman is yelling, “Il'ya!” Shane picks up the phone then. “My lyubim yeyo i budem oberegat'. U neye yest' dom u nas,” he says to her. We love her and will keep her safe. She has a home with us. It’s only then that he hears the woman on the other end sobbing. Ilya takes the phone from him and puts it on speaker so Shane can hear. “YA dam tebe deneg. Etogo ty khochesh'?" I will give you money. Is that what you want? “Net, net. Prosto... vy pozabotites' o ney?” The voice says. No, no. I just...you will take care of her? Shane answers her. “My uzhe eto delayem.” We already are. There’s a pause on the line and Shane hears her sniffle. “YA podpishu dokumenty i otpravlyu ikh.” I will sign the papers and send them. Then the line goes dead. Ilya is still pacing and Shane stands up, walking over to put his hands on his arms. “It’s okay,” he says. “It’s okay.” He pulls Ilya to him and feels Ilya let out a wet exhale, just as Ilya’s leg give. It takes a second for Shane to lower them to the floor. “Why can’t anything just be simple?” Ilya asks. He’s let the tears out then. Shane kisses at his cheeks and wipes at his tears. “When has anything ever been simple for us, Rozanov?” He kisses his lips. “We like a challenge.” Then he presses their foreheads together. “Because a challenge makes victory sweeter. Now, Oksana gets to be a part of our family. She gets to be our daughter and we get to be her dads.” Ilya nods, then he breaks his seriousness with a laugh. “Four kids and I didn’t even have to get you pregnant, Hollander.” “Fuck off,” Shane gives him a playful shove. *** The family holds a joint party to celebrate Oksana’s adoption and her 18th birthday. Yuna and David are there. They invite the team and their families. They invite Tatiana, who brings some of her teammates from Toronto. There are some players who help with the camp, Ryan Price and Leah and Max, who Oksana spent time with helping at the summer camps. Rose is there and Svetlana too. It’s a weird amalgamation of every part of their lives but also a true representation of their family. Aside from their wedding, it’s the most people they’ve ever had in their home. There’s joy and happiness and noise and Oksana beams. She’s wearing a very pink dress and her curls are down. Shane thinks she looks a little too grown up but he also doesn’t think he’s ever seen her so happy and so comfortable. Shane watches his husband as he says hi to everyone, refills drinks, makes jokes. Ilya Rozanov is magnetic. He is everything Shane is not but maybe that’s why they’re so good together. Nicky’s in the thick of it too, so much like Ilya. He’s convinced Luca and a few of the other guys to play some card game that Shane is pretty sure Nicky just made up. Maks sticks with Wyatt but also Harris, who’s showing him a video of Chiron on his phone. And then Shane is trying really hard not to cry as he’s filled with so much emotion. This was the sweetest victory. Ilya catches his eye and motions for him to come over. “Bring the champagne,” he yells over the noise. Shane grabs a bottle and a glass for himself then goes to stand by his husband. Ilya takes the bottle and refills his flute before passing it back to Shane, who fills his glass and sets the bottle down. “Okay, okay,” Ilya says. “I’m going to give a speech now and we all know that I give the best speeches so listen up.” Ilya clears his throat and then reaches for Shane’s empty hand. Shane gives it a squeeze. “I was a teenager when Oksana was born,” Ilya’s voice wavers a little. “Everything, even then, was hockey. I lived it, I breathed it. So I didn’t really have time for this little girl that was now in my life, in my family. And I was not a very good uncle. Then life got…interesting.” Ilya squeezes Shane’s hand then and looks at him for reassurance. Shane smiles at him. “And then I wasn’t really allowed to be your uncle.” Ilya sniffs. “I am lucky though. Because you knew when you needed me, I would be here for you and so you gave me a chance to be to you what I always should have been.” Shane looks at Oksana who is wiping her eyes. “I may not have always been a good uncle but I will always be your proud Papa.” Ilya looks at Shane again and Shane pulls their joined hands up to kiss his knuckles. Shane feels proud of himself for keeping it together to this point. Not just because of what Ilya’s saying but thinking about the lives that both Ilya and Oksana have lived to this point. “Dad and I love you. You have made our family complete and we are so proud of you.” “Do we bring the bag now?” Nicky yells from across the room. It causes everyone to laugh. “Yes, bring the bag,” Shane says. Nicky runs into the other room and comes back with a gift bag. Maks holds Natalia’s hand as they join Shane and Ilya. “Can you come up here, Oksana?” She nods and joins them. “We got you something to help celebrate the day and to cement that you’re part of this family.” “Open it!” Nicky bounces on his feet and shoves the bag to Oksana. She pulls out the tissue paper and Shane knows when she sees what’s inside because she bites her bottom lip and lets out a wet breath. She pulls out the jersey to show off the Hollander- Rozanov name on the back. “Now you’re officially one of us,” Maks tells her. Oksana hugs Maks, then Nicky, then cuddles Natalia. She hugs Ilya and Shane hears her say, “Thank you, Papa.” Then she moves to Shane and hugs him. “Thank you,” she pauses for a moment. “Dad.” Ilya laughs then. “She called you Dad, old man.” *** Shane and Ilya know that Oksana and Tatiana are in a relationship. It’s been obvious for months. They are also usually very private. When Tati is around, they might find them holding hands, maybe the occasional kiss. But everything is PG. This means that he and Ilya don’t hesitate to leave them alone when they take the kids to do a little Christmas shopping. They do find it odd when they arrive home and don’t find the couple on the sofa where they left them. “Maybe they’re in the game room,” Ilya says. “I’ll go and tell them we brought dinner.” Shane sends the boys to wash up while he starts setting out food. “Chto za khren'?!” Ilya yells, followed by the loud slam of a door. What the fuck?! Shane scoops up Natalia and takes the stairs two at a time to the second floor. Ilya is pacing outside Oksana’s door. “What happened?” Shane asks. Ilya’s face is impossibly red when he turns to his husband. “I found them! Having sex!” “What’s sex?” Nicky asks from behind them. Shane turns around to see him and Maks staring with wide eyes. “Nothing for you to worry about right now,” he tells his son. “Maks, can you take Nat downstairs? Help get her and Nicky situated and we’ll be right down.” Shane sets Natalia down and Maks puts his hand out for her. He watches the children disappear out of sight and then turns back to his husband. “Okay, we are going to calm down. We are going to eat dinner with our young children and put them to bed. Then we will have a conversation with Oksana and Tatiana,” Shane tells him. Ilya is staring at him. “Why can’t we talk to them now?” “Because I think things might be said that we don’t mean or we can’t take back if we talk now,” Shane says. “Why are you being so, so…” “Reasonable?” Shane finishes for him. “Because you were the reasonable one when my dad caught us. You talked me down. It’s my turn to return the favor.” Oksana’s door opens and she steps out. She closes it behind her and looks thoroughly embarrassed. “I’m so sorry,” she starts. She’s wringing her hands again and looks like she might cry. Shane puts his hand up. “We’ll talk about it later. Bring Tatiana downstairs.” Oksana steps back into the room. “Podrostki!” Ilya groans as he throws his hands up. Teenagers! “Ilya, later,” Shane says. He grabs Ilya and takes him downstairs. Luckily the boys seem oblivious to anything that happened. Maks had gotten the Thai food containers out and lined them up on the counter. Natalia’s in her high chair. Soon Tatiana and Oksana are in the kitchen as well. But dinner is awkward to say the least. Neither Oksana nor Tatiana will meet Shane or Ilya’s eyes. Shane also doesn’t really have an appetite, while Ilya makes a scene of stabbing the shrimp in his Pad Thai. After dinner has been cleaned up, the kids in pajamas and tucked into bed, Shane and Ilya sit at the table in the breakfast nook with Oksana and Tatiana in front of them. He instantly remembers he and Ilya sitting in front of his parents after they’d been caught. His parents hadn’t responded with anything but love and support and he hoped that he and Ilya would do the same. “Papa, Dad,” Oksana says. “I’m really really sorry. “Listen,” Shane says. “You’re not in trouble for having sex.” “Yes, you are!” Ilya interrupts. “Ilya,” Shane turns to him. “Not helping.” “She’s 18!” Ilya says. “Ilya, again, I’m going to ask you to think about what we were doing when we were 18,” Shane whispers. He knows Oksana heard him though because she frowns. “This,” he says as he gestures to Oksana and Tatiana, “is not the end of the world.” Shane watches Ilya fold his arms and an adorable pout finds his lips. “Okay, you are not in trouble for having sex,” Ilya says. “However, I don’t like the idea of you doing it here,” Shane adds. “What if your brothers had found you instead of Papa?” Tatiana speaks up then. “It’s not just Oksana’s fault. We haven’t seen each other in a few weeks and, I…I’m sorry. We should have been more careful.” “We appreciate that,” Shane says. But when he looks at Oksana, she’s breathing very hard, her eyes clenched tight. “Ilya,” Shane says to get his attention. In an instant, Ilya’s up. He effortlessly pulls Oksana’s chair out, with her sitting in it and then kneels in front of her. “Dyshite. Vdokh i vydokh,” he says. Breathe. In and out. Shane sees Oksana’s breathing change. “S toboy vse v poryadke, dorogaya.” You’re okay, sweetheart. Oksana finds her voice and opens her eyes. “I thought, I was afraid that you would decide you didn’t want me anymore.” It hits Shane then that this has happened to Oksana before. He remembers the scared girl that arrived with Svetlana two years ago. So Shane joins Ilya on the floor in front of their daughter. “Oksana, there is nothing you could do to make us not want you. That’s not the way our love works, okay?” “When we adopted you, we said forever,” Ilya says. “We mean forever.” Oksana reaches out so she can hug both of them. “YA vas oboikh ochen' sil'no lyublyu.” I love you both so much. They stay there for a minute, until Shane’s knee starts to ache. “Ilya, help me up.” Ilya makes a show of helping him stand, even though he himself grips the table and flinches when he pulls himself up. “Okay, go to bed now,” Ilya says. He leans down and kisses the top of Oksana’s head. The girls get up. “Maybe Tatiana sleeps in the guest room though.” “Yes, Papa,” Oksana says before they walk up the stairs.

Chapter 5: The Future

Chapter Summary Changes for the Hollander-Rozanov family and a wedding!

Chapter Notes

Hi everyone! This is the last chapter. It’s not specific to Oksana but more to the family as a whole. I have a few other things in the work for this series. I hope you’ll keep reading! See the end of the chapter for more notes The Future It’s March when Ilya says it. “It’s time,” he groans as the trainer fixes an ice pack to his shoulder. Shane doesn’t have to ask what he’s talking about. He knows because he feels it too. They are both 40. Which isn’t old. Unless of course you play a very physical sport that taxes your body. Over the course of their careers, they have had torn tendons, pulled muscles, bruised ribs, had concussed heads, and there comes a point where one more of…anything, really, might be the last. “We quit before we don’t have a choice,” Shane says. “Yes,” Ilya responds. *** They make the playoffs but don’t win another cup. A young Vancouver team does, another reminder that it’s time. And that's a little bittersweet. They hold a joint press conference to announce their retirement. There are a lot of tears. Both Shane and Ilya make a point of thanking their teammates, old and present, who have become family. Ilya shockingly thanks Scott Hunter. Most people think it’s a joke but Shane knows that without Scott Hunter, they might not be sitting there. Without Scott, Shane wonders if Ilya would have come to his cottage all those years ago. They thank each other too. Both talk about how even before they knew they loved each other, they made each other better players. All of their children are there in their Hollander-Rozanov jerseys. Shane silently wonders if they’ll ever have a reason to wear them again. They don’t take many questions. Most reporters want to know, “What will you do now?” “Be dads,” Ilya says. “Maybe be hockey dads.” *** In the fall, Oksana starts university…in Toronto. It’s close enough that she can come home if she needs to but far enough that she is able to build her own life. She wants to be an adolescent therapist like the one she saw when she first came to their home. It’s a rough adjustment for everyone when she leaves. Shane and Ilya try to stay positive and smile and encourage her. But they both cry as soon as they get in the car to drive the four hours back to Ottawa. *** Retirement is weird. Sure, it gives them a chance to be around a lot more for the boys and Natalia. But all the time they spent practicing, playing, traveling, none of that exists anymore. “Maybe we get another dog,” Ilya says one morning as they’re laying in bed. Shane groans. “We’re not getting another dog.” They get another dog. A husky mix that they name Nika. She and Anya get along and she’s so gentle with Natalia. They do more work with the Irina Foundation. They get to be a little more hands on than before. They do become hockey dads. First Maks, then Nicky, then both. Natalia likes to skate but she doesn’t have any interest in playing hockey. She does love to watch it though and she becomes more knowledgeable about the game than either of them. They visit Toronto as often as they can to see Oksana and Tatiana. Shane knows they will probably get married someday but he respects and appreciates Tati waiting for Oksana to finish school first. *** In Oksana’s last year of university, they get a call from Chelsea VanGarten, the Ottawa Oracles coach. “The owners want to sell the team,” she explains. “I gave them your names.” “Why would you do that?” Shane asks. “Because I think you both miss professional hockey. I also know how important inclusivity is to you both,” Chelsea says. “More than anything, you have two daughters that you love and if they played you know the type of owners you would want them to have.” “How do you know we can afford it?” Ilya asks. “Women’s hockey teams aren’t that expensive and you can decide how involved you want to be. We have good management but it would be nice for it to come from the very top too,” Chelsea says. Shane and Ilya exchange a look. Neither one of them would know the first thing about owning a sports team. A voice in his head tells him they would figure it out, like they’ve figured everything out. Together. “Can we think about it?” Shane asks. “Of course,” she tells them. “Just know you may be getting a call. I mean it when I say that you are two of the greatest players to ever play the game and I think you have a lot more to give to the game yet.” When they hang up, they don’t talk about it. Until they get another phone call from Oracle management. They send over financial specs and information about what their role would look like. Yuna and David come over and review the information with them. “The team is in a pretty good financial place now. But you have to know that this isn’t something that’s going to make you a lot of money,” David tells them. “But it might be a good opportunity. Your brand is inclusivity and diversity. Owning a women’s hockey team would be an awesome way to continue that,” Yuna adds. “The money worries me,” Shane says. “Too bad you couldn’t find some other investors to go in too,” Yuna says casually. “Yeah,” Shane says. He and Ilya decide to sleep on it. They’ll talk about it more in the morning. Only Shane can’t stop thinking about it. He tries to sleep but doesn’t. His mind keeps running through different scenarios. He also doesn’t want to admit to himself (or anyone) how much he really wants to do this. When he has a good idea, he pushes at a sleeping Ilya. “Wake up, I have an idea,” Shane says. “No,” Ilya says. “Seriously, wake up,” Shane flips the bedside lamp on. “I think we should do it,” he adds. Ilya groans in his sleep. “Hollander, is the middle of the night.” “I know but I have my best ideas in the middle of the night,” Shane tells him. “I think we should do it. I think we should buy the team.” “I thought you said the money of it didn’t look good,” Ilya says. “It doesn’t,” Shane answers. “If we do it alone.” “What’s your solution then?” Ilya asks. Shane has to mentally prepare himself for this part because he knows Ilya isn’t going to like it. “Scott Hunter.” Sure enough, Ilya picks up his pillow and puts it over his head to groan louder. “Not just Scott. Troy too.” “Oh you want the team to be really gay,” Ilya chuckles. “No,” Shane retorts. “I want the team to be owned by people who know what it’s like to be marginalized no matter how good they are at the sport they play.” Ilya is quiet and then sighs. “Nat does not want to play but maybe one day we will have a granddaughter that does, yes? It would be good to know there would be a place for her.” “Right, and we build a strong supportive community,” Shane adds. “Okay,” Ilya says. “I’ll talk to Troy. But you get to call Scott Hunter.” *** When Shane calls Scott Hunter, Scott laughs. “Wait, you’re serious?” “Very,” Shane says. Scott had tried his hand at coaching with the Admirals. Not the head coach but on the staff. From what Shane had heard, he hated it. But like Shane and Ilya, Scott still had something to offer to the game. Shane tells him that too. They talk for about an hour. Shane gives him all the details and tells him he’ll send more specifics. (He feels a little like he’s trying to sell him a used car). Later that evening he receives a text from Scott: We’re in. Ilya has to do a lot more convincing with Troy and Harris. But Ilya Rozanov does not take no for an answer, even if he has to play a little dirty. So he brings up Eleanore, Troy and Harris’s daughter. Don’t they want to create a place she could play one day if she wanted? Troy and Harris say yes. When they take ownership of the team and have a press conference, they make sure that all of their daughters and their sons are there with them. Shane and Ilya still get to be part of hockey and hopefully build a better game along the way. *** When Oksana turns 25, Tatiana (finally) proposes. Suddenly, Ilya and Shane are planning a wedding. Their own wedding had been pretty small, all things considered. Shane has never felt like his children were missing out on anything because they had two fathers, but this is an area where he and Ilya aren’t exactly experts. Flowers, colors, venues, all the intricate details of a wedding. But Shane is determined. So he does what he does when he’s unsure about something. He researches, he reads. He throws himself into learning everything he can. He enlists Nat’s help too, who’s ten but thinks she’s 25 herself. Oksana and Tatiana come to Ottawa to start the planning process. “We’d like to get married at the cottage, if that’s okay,” Oksana says. “By the water, end of June.” Shane feels Ilya reach for his hand under the table and he takes it, intertwining their fingers. “That’s a great idea,” Shane says. “That gives us a good color palette to work with,” Natalia says as she writes something in her little pink notebook with her pen with a pink puffball on the top. “Greens, blues, pale pink,” Shane says. “Maybe florals with green and blue.” Nat nods and starts writing again. “What are we thinking for you two as far as dresses or suits?” Natalia asks. Shane looks up at Tatiana and Oksana, who look slightly shocked. “Um, I think I would like a dress,” Oksana says. “I would like a suit. But like the suits Chelsea VanGarten wears, still feminine,” Tatiana says. Natalia writes that down. “White? Cream? Ecru?” She asks. He turns to look at Ilya whose eyes are wide. “What is happening right now?” “White,” Oksana says. “Not like bright white.” “Like a candlelight white,” Shane says. He motions for Natalia who hands him a magazine. He flips to a page and pushes it towards Oksana. “Like this.” The dress in the picture is a soft white, off the shoulder, a tailored bodice (Terms he’s only recently learned from his research.) “That’s beautiful,” Oksana says. “I like the collar and the color.” They go through other aspects of the wedding. Food, DJ, Bridal Parties. “I wanted to ask Maks to be my best man,” Oksana says. “And we wanted to ask Uncle Wyatt to do the ceremony.” It’s funny to Shane to think that Maks is the same age now that Oksana was when she first came into their lives. He’s 16, tall and serious. He’s also very close to Oksana. And Wyatt Hayes is more than just an honorary uncle. He’s been present at holidays, birthdays, graduations. He is the perfect person to perform the wedding. Tatiana wants one of her teammates to stand with her. “And I want both of you to give me away,” Oksana says. Ilya puts his hand over his heart. Shane can only smile. “Of course,” he says. When they finish for the day, Oksana stands up. “Okay, but how did you know everything about wedding planning? You and Nat.” Shane knows he’s blushing but it’s Natalia who answers. “Daddy and I did research.” Oksana looks at him. “I didn’t want you to miss anything. I want you to have the best wedding day,” Shane tells her. “And we didn't know anything about chiffon or satin. Or eggshell and alabaster white. Or peonies or tulips. So your sister and I learned.” She comes around the table and then hugs him. “Thank you, Dad.” *** It’s a beautiful day in June, Oksana and Tatiana’s wedding day. Shane and Ilya are dressed in new dark blue suits that match Maks and Nicky. Oksana is getting ready in the room she and Natalia shared. The men are waiting in the living room for their first look of the bride. Shane and Ilya went dress shopping with her but don’t actually know the dress she picked. She wanted them to be surprised. Natalia, on the other hand, is floating between the two areas. She gives updates on the entire process. Until it’s time for her own hair to be done and her dress to be put on. She’s the flower girl. Shane and Ilya worried she might be a little too old for the job but Natalia begged to differ. She argued that she was just the right amount of mature to get the job done without making a mess like a younger girl would. No one argued with that. Tati is getting ready at Yuna and David’s. Her aunt came in from Minnesota and her sister from the Netherlands. None of her family from Russia will be there though. Shane is keeping a close eye on Maks who is bouncing his leg, biting his bottom lip, and scrolling through his phone. “You okay, Maks?” Maks looks up. “Yeah, uh, just rereading my speech.” Maks had been so excited to be Oksana’s best man but Shane knows he’s terrified to speak in front of everyone. “You’re going to do great, bub. Just remember, deep breaths,” Shane tells him. Maks nods. Shane hears Natalia’s shoes on the stairs and they all turn to look at her. She twirls so the skirt of her light blue dress blooms around her. Her black curls are down and she’s wearing a matching blue headband. “You look beautiful, ma minette,” Shane gives her a tight hug. My kitten. “I feel so pretty,” she says. “Ty prekrasna, printsessa,” Ilya adds. You are beautiful, princess. Not to be outdone, Natalia smiles, then bows and says, “Merci and spasibo.” “Here she comes!” Svetlana says up the stairs. The boys stand up and button their jackets. Shane can hear the familiar click of a camera mixed with the sound of high heels hitting the wooden steps. Then she’s standing there in front of them. “Wow,” Shane says. Her curls are styled half-way up, her dress is perfect, she’s glowing. She’s also crying now. “Don’t make her cry! You’ll ruin her makeup!” Svetlana says. The boys take turns hugging Oksana. Then Shane does. “You look so beautiful, sweetheart.” Then Ilya is next. “There is one thing missing though,” Ilya says. He pulls a little jewelry box from his pocket and gives it to her. Oksana opens the box to find a replica of the necklace Orthodox cross Ilya wears. “I know we are not religious people. But the necklace I wear is one of the only things I have left of your grandmother. I never take it off because I can feel her with me. Even though you never knew her, this is like a piece of her will be with you too.” “Papa,” Oksana sniffs and then hugs Ilya. He helps her put the necklace on and then kisses her cheek. Music starts from outside and Shane looks through the windows to see Wyatt standing on the dock. “Are you ready?” He asks. Oksana sniffs one last time, then nods. Ilya takes her left arm and Shane takes her right as they make their way outside. *** “Hi everyone. I’m Oksana’s brother, Maks. Um, I don’t know if everyone knows this but we’re all adopted,” Maks says. It gets a little laugh from the crowd. “Shocking, I know.” His eyes move to Shane. Shane nods at him and takes a deep breath which causes Maks to do the same. “We also happen to be a hockey family, another startling fact, I’m sure.” He gets another laugh. “My Dad has this saying. He uses it on the ice when someone gets a little too cocky. He says that a team is not one person, a team is the sum of all lines.” Maks takes a deep breath again. “Every person brings something that the team needs. For us, our team is our family. Dad is dad and Papa is papa, I don’t think I need to expand on that.” He gets another laugh. “I’m the protector, the serious one. Nicky is the entertainer, the speedster. Natalia is the observer, and, let’s face it, she can be a trickster. And Oksana, she is the glue. She makes us all know that what we are is exactly what we should be. Dad and papa always say we were not complete until she joined our family, our team, and they’re right. Now we have another person on our team too,” Maks motions towards Tatiana. “We are the best team because we have each other. Congratulations, Oksana and Tatiana!” Oksana and Tatiana both take a turn hugging Maks but as soon as he’s finished, he finds Shane. “That was perfect, Maks,” he tells him. “Was it okay? That I said your line quote?” Maks asks him. “It was great,” Shane answers. “I hope I never have to give another speech as long as I live,” Maks says. “You might win an MVP someday,” Ilya says from beside them. Maks scoffs, “Goalies don’t win MVPs.” “Who’s to say you won’t change that?” Ilya says. He puts his hand out for Shane. “Dance with me?” Shane groans this time. “I’m a terrible dancer.” “It’s one dance. And I asked the DJ to play a little something special for us,” Ilya says. He pulls him onto the dance floor just as the music of “Diamonds” by Rhianna fills the air. “It’s our song,” he whispers in Shane’s ear. Shane chuckles and then rest his head on Ilya’s chest. “The first time we danced to this song…” “At our wedding,” Ilya says. “Did you ever think we would be standing at our daughter’s wedding someday?” Shane asks. Ilya pulls back a little. “I don’t know. I think I didn’t think about a lot of things until I met you.” “Fair,” Shane says. He takes a minute to look at his children. Nat is spinning circles with Ethan and Eleanore Barrett-Drover. Maks is talking to Wyatt and Ryan Price. He looks very serious as he nods at whatever Ryan is telling him. And 14-year old Nicky is following around one of Tatiana’s nieces (God help them!). He looks over to see Oksana and Tatiana have joined them on the dance floor. Oksana is laughing at something but places a kiss on Tati’s lips. “How soon do you think it will be before we are grandparents?” Ilya asks. “Jesus, Ilya,” Shane says. “Will be fun to be grandparents. I will be the handsome, fun dedushka and you will be a boring, serious grandfather,” Ilya says. He pulls Shane back against his chest. “I guess there are worse things to be,” Shane says. “I love you, Rozanov.” Ilya leans down and kisses him. “ya tozhe tebya lyublyu, Hollander.” *** Two years later, Oksana Hollander-Rozanov makes Shane and Ilya grandparents. She and Tatiana welcome a little girl they name Irina. Ilya is the handsome, fun dedushka. Shane is not boring. He is serious though and his granddaughter learns to call him Grumps. Her first outfit is an Ottawa Oracles jersey.

Chapter End Notes

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End Notes

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