Rating:

Not Rated

Archive Warning:

Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Categories:

F/M, M/M

Fandom:

Heated Rivalry (TV)

Relationships:

Shane Hollander/Ilya Rozanov, Ilya Rozanov/Original Female Character(s)

Characters:

Shane Hollander, Ilya Rozanov, Original Female Character(s), Svetlana Vetrova, Cliff Marlow | Cliff Marleau, Yuna Hollander, David Hollander, Hayden Pike, Jackie Pike, Hayden Pike's Children

Additional Tags:

Accidental Baby Acquisition, One Night Stands, Difficult Decisions

Language:

English

Stats:

Published: 2026-03-14 Completed: 2026-04-13 Words: 41,320 Chapters: 19/19

One, Then Two, Now Three

Summary

Ilya gets a call that changes his life.
How does his relationship with Shane change now that he is going to be a father?

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Ilya knew that Shanes parents were never going to be thrilled that Ilya got a one night stand pregnant. He'd prepared for it. He'd explained that it had happened when Shane was with Rose, and that they weren't actually together when Ilya met Riko. He promised up and down that he'd been as careful as he could have been, it just hadn't been enough. Shane had run interference between them, being a comforting presence and showing nothing but love and support. 

And then Yuna met Riko. 

She'd insisted that her and David go to Florida to meet 'this girl'. If Shane was going to be a joint parent in this endeavour, then it was important that his parents were involved. Still in the middle of the season, Ilya hadn't been able to find a reason why not, and Shane thought it was a good idea - considering that if Ilya was in Ottawa it would be reasonable that 'grandparents' would be seeing a lot of the baby. 

Ilya hadn't thought about how it might look to them, actually seeing Riko. 

Asian American Riko. Riko with her long black hair, almond eyes and freckles. Riko who was now very visibly pregnant. And... well... very visibly looked like Shane. Riko who could probably pass as Hollanders twin. 

"My mom is pissed." Shane told Ilya over facetime, which Ilya understood. He was in Vegas and Shane was in Texas, and Yuna and David were in Florida. "Maybe you could have told me that she's half Japanese." He pointed out, "And then I wouldn't be having to go through this again." 

"I didn't sleep with her because of that!" Ilya pointed out. "I slept with her because she looked like you." He paused. "That is... not better?"

"No, I think that might be worse." Shane sighed. "Is there anything else that you've forgotten to tell me about this girl that might be important?"

Ilya shook his head. "I don't know that much about her. Are... you mad?"

Shane looked away. "Yes. And no." He said after a while. "Mad because you could have told me that you slept with a girl who looked exactly like me, and not mad because... thats also weirdly flattering? My mom said she's very pretty." He added. 

Ilya nodded. "Yes. Is nice too - not trying to take all my money or blackmail or anything." He paused. "She is happy to give baby to me, no fighting."

"My mom has some ideas about that too." On the other side of the phone, Shane pulled out a notebook. Ilya had started to think of it as 'the baby plan' because Shane had been writing lists and ideas in it, crossing them out as he completed each task, bought each required item. "She thinks that just handing over the baby isn't enough. Because we do plan on coming out after we retire, it'll look really fucking weird that you just happen to have a kid who might look like a very deliberate mix of Japanese-Russian. She thinks it might be a good idea to suggest it was planned, like a surrogate." He paused. "Like we were together and decided to have a kid and found a girl who looked like me, and then you donated sperm." 

"Is that better?"

"I don't know. It might look better than you having yellow fever." 

"I don't know what that is." Ilya admitted. 

Shane sighed. "Its when you have a fetish or kink for Asian people." 

Ilya frowned. "Have attraction to Shane Hollander, so maybe not wrong?" He grinned a little. "Is like saying I have kink for people who fold clothes before sex and have freckles. Is true?"

"Please don't ever tell anyone you have fucking yellow fever because you think I'm hot." Shane said, looking very serious. "Its not the same thing and it's really fucked for a lot of people. Don't make fun of that." 

"Okay," He said, holding up his hands. "Okay, did not know." 

"Sorry. My mom... she's had people want to date her because of it. Before my dad. And then when she married my dad people were like... weird about it." 

Ilya nodded. "Okay. Is not joke. Surrogate is like, paid to have baby then?"

Nodding, Shane flipped to the most recent page. "My mom - once she got over the whole, Riko being Japanese thing - she said it might be a good idea to have an NDA too. Just so there is more privacy around everything."

"Riko is happy not to say anything." Ilya pointed out. 

"Yeah, but she might not be in a couple of years." Shane said. "I don't think that will be the case, but it would suck if she changed her mind 5 years down the line." Shane looked up from the notebook. "I think my mom just wants this to go as smoothly as possible. It was always going to be difficult, and I think she's just... over compensating."

Neither of them pointed out that the baby was adding fuel to what was going to be a very flammable 'coming out' in a few years. 

"Um, the last scans looked good, mom said. Very healthy, no issues. She also asked if we wanted to know the gender." 

"Does she know?"

"Probably? She hasn't told me, but I also know my mom and its the kind of thing she'd ask." 

Ilya nodded. "Maybe yes?" He said, after thinking about it for a while.  "Might make it more... real? To know. Is difficult to keep calling it...it?"

Shane agreed, going on the expression on his face. "Yeah, I'll let her know. I'll tell her to call you once she knows for sure." 

He didn't want that. "Why call me?" He asked. "Is best to call you and let you know."

"You can't avoid her forever."

"Am not avoiding." Ilya lied. "Am not!" He said, after looking at Shanes expression. "Shane, she hates me." He explained. "I hurt you, I messed up plans..." He shrugged helplessly. 

Shanes smile was small, but there. "She's mad right now," He said, which Ilya didn't need to be told. He understood all of the reasons why his boyfriends mother might not want to talk to the person who caused him nothing but stress and heartache recently. "But she'll also get over it a lot quicker if you stopped acting like you'd rather die than talk to her."

Sure. Ilya thought. 

The conversation with Yuna wasn't as painful as Ilya expected. It was still awkward and weird and Ilya felt like he needed to apologise every other breath, but she didn't try to tell him to leave Shane because it was better than ruining his life, so Ilya counted it as a win. 

And he was going to be a father in two months to a... girl. A baby girl. 

He'd panicked for a few hours, called Shane and they both panicked for a few hours because surely a boy would be the easier option for a gay and bi man to raise? And Shane wasn't good with girls, and Ilya was 90% sure that Shane would be the sensible one, and Ilya would be the fun one.

So, a girl. 

The house in Ottawa had been bought, without Ilya stepping foot in the province. David and Shane had done a walk around with the real estate person and Shane told Ilya that it was perfect so, he'd bought that one. 

The deal with the Centaurs was pretty much completed, and would just need to wait till the end of the season. 

He'd bought a SUV with a latch fitting system for the car seat that Shane had researched, and it was currently sitting in the long term garage at the airport, with the car seat already installed. He'd decided not to get vanity plates. Shane talked him out of it because he didn't want fans following the car when the baby was in the car. That made sense. 

He'd arranged for an interior decorator to go through and... well, decorate. He'd sat with Shane on a video call and put together a Pinterest board for what he wanted the house to look like, and ideas for the playroom and a girls bedroom. 

Ilya had also been in contact with a company that provided stay at home care for babies. Shane hadn't thought of that - he assumed that his parents would be looking after the baby through the season. Ilya didn't think that was practical. Or fair. "Lots of people have nanny." Ilya pointed out. 

"Not here!" Shane argued. 

"We both are gone for weeks at a time." Ilya said with a shrug. "I can't take baby to away games - and is not fair to tell your parents to look after her for weeks."

"I don't like the idea of a nanny." Shane said, looking distinctly uncomfortable. "Its weird."

A month before she arrived, Yuna called him. 

"Shane told me you plan on hiring a nanny." 

"Yes." Ilya nodded. She'd called him a couple of times, but mostly it had been to get contact information for his lawyers, his agent or Svetlana. Ilya was very much aware that she was still working through her dislike of him. Any positive feelings for Ilya Rosanov had evaporated with the news of an unexpected baby. "Is good company. Lots of people use." 

"Hm." The sound wasn't encouraging. It sounded very much like the sound she'd made when Ilya said he'd leave Boston for Ottawa. "David and I have been talking." She said after a moment. "He wants to retire."

"Oh." Ilya said. "Is he not enjoying... treasury board?" He wanted to show he paid attention. He listened! 

"No, he likes it, but he wants a change." She said. "And with my managing Shane, we don't need the money." 

Ilya knew that to be true. Yuna was very good at managing Shane, and she took the same percentage cut as his agent - before the baby, they'd talked about her taking on his management as well. Keep the whole thing 'in the family'.  Ilya had been a little worried - his experience with family and money wasn't exactly the best, but Shane had made it clear that Yuna was very professional about the whole thing. There was truth to the rumours that Shane made just as much with endorsements as he had with his hockey contract. The move to Ottawa would result in less options for Ilya, but Yuna had been confident. 

"Shane doesn't like the idea of nanny." Ilya admitted. 

"No, he doesn't." Yuna agreed. "That's why I was calling. With David retiring, we think it's reasonable that during the season we would take her."

"Is not fair-"

"Ilya." She interrupted. "I know we've been a little... distant. With the whole baby thing." A sigh. "Its just a big change, on top of a big change. David and I were just coming to terms with you and Shane, and then less than a month later we find out... this. It's a lot to take in."

"Yes," he agreed. "Am sorry, Yuna, I didn't-"

"I know. This wasn't part of the plan. Shane has made it very clear that relationship is... it. For him. He's made it clear that this is... your baby. Together."

Ilya nodded mutely. He wasn't sure his voice wouldn't crack if he spoke. 

"So if that's the case, then this is our... granddaughter." Her voice wobbled a little. "And if I'm being honest, I thought this wouldn't really be an option, after Shane came out." He could hear her moving around on the other side of the phone. putting things away, tidying up. Shane did it too, when conversations got a little difficult. "David and I want... we want to be involved. As much as possible. So it makes sense that when you are both away, that we look after her. While some people do know I'm Shanes mom, its only the really diehard fans - and very few people even know who David is when he's standing right beside Shane. There is very little chance that people are going to know that she's being pushed around in a stroller by David." She took a breath. "Think about it. Please. We want... we really want to be involved."

"Is a lot to ask." 

"We're asking you." She pointed out. "We want this - David is already planning to turn Shanes old room into a nursery. I'm afraid you'll be in the guest room when you stay over." 

"Yuna..." Ilya started - but he wasn't sure how he wanted to finish. "I, uh." She gave him time. Normally he liked that - she was one of the only people that understood that sometimes he needed a little more time to translate what he wanted to sat into English. The issue was, he didn't know what he wanted to say in Russian either. "I didn't... I didn't want this." He admitted. "I know this... changes. Things." 

Her sigh sounded so much like his mama that it took his breath away. That same long suffering sigh of mamas all over the world it seemed. "Ilya." Another sigh. "I think we both know that this isn't ideal. However," Another sigh. "If this relationship had been... new..." She stopped and took a long breath. "If this has started at All Stars, I wouldn't be as understanding. However, for a 10 year relationship - things are a little different. David and I love Shane - and he loves you." He could hear a slight smile in her words as she spoke about Shane. "I just need you to promise me that this will be the last of the life changing revelations for a few years at least." 

"No promises." Ilya managed, aware his throat was tight and it probably sounded like he was crying. Again. 

"I'm... proud of you. I'm proud that your not just hiding this away, or just paying for it to go away." 

It had been the first time anyone had said they were proud of him in a long... long time. He nodded, although he knew that Yuna couldn't see him. He didn't talk. he didn't trust his voice. 

"We're doing this." She said, after it was clear he wasn't going to say anything. "We're doing this."

Chapter 3

Karina Rosanov was born weighing 7.1lbs, at 4am. She had big brown eyes and three distinct freckles below her left eye. Her mother held her and cried, before handing her over. She did not change her mind, much to the relief of Svetlana, who wasn't sure what she was supposed to do if Riko decided to keep her. 

"Svetlana is going to pick up the car at long term parking, and drive here." Shane was saying, looking at the flight notifications. "She'll stop a couple of times for gas and to feed and change Karina if she needs. So they should be here around about 4pm." 

It had been the same plan for two days, and it hadn't changed at all, but that hadn't stopped Shane and his mother going over the same information several times. They were sitting in the family room in Ilyas new house. Ilya had two weeks for 'personal reasons' which the Raiders weren't super thrilled with but Ilya had been able to wrangle it. Shane had a knee injury that wasn't quite as bad as he said it was (but the PT's always suggested a week for even the most minor thing). But it meant that he arrived at midnight the night before and wouldn't have to leave for 6 whole days. 

The new house was exactly what Ilya had wanted. Over two levels, the lower floor was decorated in warm brown and sage green, with big windows that showed a massive garden - a covered pool and enough space to throw a decent party or build one of those adventure plays sets that Ilya had been eyeing - the type with a swing, climbing frames and slides. Shane had convinced him not to get one until Karina was walking at least. There was a gym in the finished basement, and four bedrooms. One master bedroom which had been decorated in various shades of blue for Ilya and Shane, a guest room for Yuna and David in greens, and another guest room in yellows.

Then, lastly, Karinas room. If Ilya had been in charge of decorating that one, it would probably look like someone vomited pink over every surface. Luckily, the decorator that David had hired was good at his job and the room was very prettily decorated. Things matched without being part of a set and had more colours than pink. Shane and Yuna had been deep into the latest child raising methods, and if Ilya heard the word Montessori one more time he was going to scream. 

David had been cooking in the spacious and incredibly babyproofed kitchen since he arrived that morning. There was an entire counter with brand new appliances for the baby - a bottle cleaner, a milk warmer, a steriliser and something that looked like a space ship but made formula milk faster. Ilya had also bought three different types of baby monitors because Shane hadn't been able to pick the best one and had a panic attack over something happening to the baby in the middle of the night and them not knowing. 

David and Yuna lived 15 minutes away by car, and Shanes place in Montreal was a 2 hour drive. Shane had completed it twice, once in the middle of the night and one during rush hour. Ilya had told him at the time he was being obsessive, but knowing that Shane was able to get there in 2 hours (or less) was actually incredibly comforting. 

And Karina would be there in 5 hours. 

She was... small. A lot smaller than Ilya had expected. She was also asleep, which he'd expected. She had dark whisps of hair in whorls on her head, so fine that it seemed more fur than hair. And she had three moles under her left eye, in a little line. They were tiny, just little dark freckles on her pale skin, and Ilya was completely, utterly unexpectedly in love with her. 

She was perfect. 

Shane was staying back, and Ilya was unsure if he was giving space or holding back, but he was pleased for it. Just so he could sit on the floor and look at where she slept in the car seat Svetlana had carried in. She was wearing a tiny yellow one piece outfit - a onesie, Shane had called them when he was adding several to the online shopping cart - and had a pale pink blanket tucked around her.

Ilya could hardly breathe looking at her. She had a pronounced cupids bow that Ilya could tell was just a smaller version of his mouth, which made his heart give an electric thrum. His mouth. His moles. But things that weren't found in him - dark hair, Svetlana said her eyes were so dark they were almost black. She had wispy dark lashes and perfectly manicured black eyebrows. Every so often she would give a little twitch or snuffle and Ilya couldn't describe the effect it had on his heart. 

In the background, he could hear Shane asking Svetlana questions - how the flight went, was the drive okay? Yuna was flicking through the paperwork that had also been brought along with his daughter, and David was simply watching him. Ilya wasn't really thinking. He carefully traced his fingertip over her cheek. There were little white spots around the top of her fat little cheeks, but he'd read about milk spots - milia - and they were normal. She'd spent a few hours under a special light to help with jaundice, and Ilya had arranged for a baby doctor to come to the house the following day to go over all the things he was worried about. He was worried about a lot. 

Eventually, though, he felt Shane come to stand behind him. "She's tiny." He whispered, like anything louder might make her pop out of existence like a little bubble. "She has your mouth." 

Ilya nodded. She did. It was right there, his mouth - but tiny and perfect and... he started to cry. 

Fat tears just fell from his eyes without any warning or sound. He wasn't even sure why, because he wasn't sad. 

"Hey, its okay." Shane whispered, getting down onto the floor with him, pulling him against his body. "Its okay, she's here. Everything worked out."

He managed to nod. He wanted to say so many things. Thank you for being here, thank you for not leaving, thank you for making this happen, thank you, thank you, thank you. But his mouth wasn't working. He felt like he wasn't even in his own body, like he was simply a 'thing' made to watch her sleep. 

Then she woke up. It happened slowly, enough for him to commit each movement to memory. Firstly, her eyes - which were a little swollen looking - twitched. A frown formed between her perfect eyebrows and then faded out again, and her mouth became a tight line, then a pucker. It happened slowly and yet he was still taken aback when she opened her eyes. She didn't seem to focus on anything, but her eyes were... beautiful. Svetlana had been right, her eyes were dark, it was difficult to tell where her iris started and pupil ended. Stunningly deep and soulful. She wasn't really looking at him, just... looking. Shane had told him that babies didn't see anything really well at first, then in black in white, and then colour. It happened over time.  

"Oh." Shane said, after a moment. "Wow." 

Ilya could trust his throat, couldn't imagine what he could possibly say to explain how he was feeling. He'd heard that having a baby changes a person, he'd been reading about parental love and how to overcome the lack of instant connection - which was something he'd been seriously worried about. He'd been worried he would struggle to love her. That he'd be distant and cold, that he would look at his own daughter and feel... nothing. 

That worry felt so ridiculous as he watched her take in the room. He loved her so much that it felt like his whole world had shrunk into her tiny body. That brought him new and different fears. So many new fears. How could something so small mean so much to him already?

"Do you think we should take her out of the carrier?" Shane asked, voice low. "Maybe give her something to eat and... a bath? Because of the plane?"

At the sound of his voice, her eyes blinked, slow and wet.

Then she started to cry. 

It had been... terrible, Ilya thought, as he sat on the couch and adjusted his hold on Karina. She'd started crying and he didn't know how to take her out of the carrier, hadn't know how to hold her right or soothe her tears or make a bottle - even with all the gadgets. It had only been with the help of Svetlana that he'd been able to get her out of the car seat, and then Yuna to bounce her in a little wiggle that Ilya had tried to commit to memory. Shane had apparently practiced making a bottle of formula, and was able to hand one over to his mother. It hadn't stopped Karina from crying. 

Yuna had gone to the baby room with Ilya and Shane trailing behind her, both of them getting more anxious the more she cried. With an efficiency that Ilya hadn't expected, Yuna had Karina stripped down to her diaper and on the changing mat. Yuna had then turned to Ilya and told him to take over. He'd panicked, but stepped up. She showed him how to take off the diaper, which was full of greenish sludge that smelt like something had died. Shane had gagged, but hadn't left.

Yuna slowly walked them both through how to wipe and clean Karina, making sure she was wiped in the 'correct' direction. Showing how to dry her skin and then how to put lotion on to stop her from getting a rash. Ilyas hands felt too large, too used to fights. Clumsy and uncoordinated, he'd fumbled through cleaning her and putting a new diaper on. Shane handed him a green onesie with a little frog picture over the heart, one of the things they'd bought and washed carefully in baby safe laundry detergent. At the time all the closes had seemed so tiny - miniscule items that hardly seemed like real clothes. He'd explained it to Shane as they'd opened each item and put it into the washer. 'Like clothes for a... dolly?' Shane had laughed, holding up two pink socks that were absolutely dwarfed in his hands. 'I know what you mean,' he'd smiled. 

She'd cried the whole time he was changing her, just screaming at the top of her lungs. It didn't seem possible that her lungs would have enough air in them to produce such a sound. Yuna had shown him how to hold her properly, supporting her head and making sure he didn't squash her. He wasn't sure if he was holding her too tightly and hurting her, or not tightly enough so he was in danger of dropping her. Karina seemed to sense he was worried, and so kept wailing like an air raid siren. 

When it seemed clear that the issue wasn't the dirty diaper - or at least not just the dirty diaper - Yuna told him to sit on the couch while he fed her, said it would be easier for him to balance the bottle and the baby at the same time - but then Karina wouldn't take the bottle. She kept screaming and pushing the little rubber teet thing out of her mouth.

"Maybe we got the wrong type of bottle?" Shane said, looking through the carry bag that Svetlana had brought. "We bought the same formula she was already taking." He added, as though he hadn't painstakingly checked and double checked everything that came into the house. "Where is the bottle she had on the plane?"

"It's in the bag, in the side pocket." Sveta told him helpfully, "She didn't cry on the plane." Not as helpful. 

"Am I holding her wrong?" Ilya adjusted his hold slightly, careful to keep her head supported. Yuna shook her head comfortingly but then took Svetlana and David into the kitchen. Ilya prayed it was to get something that would stop his daughter from screaming the house down. It didn't seem possible that something so small could make such a loud and jarring sound. Her face was bright red and her eyes were swollen with tears, and Ilya felt a panic he'd pushed aside start to grip his heart. He was obviously doing something wrong, because she was in pain, or ill, or something. He had no idea. Washed and dry, refusing food - what else could she need?

Shane had found the bottle, and it was the same brand as the one Ilya was failing to tempt Karina with. "Karina, please." He soothed in Russian. "You are crying for no reason."

She didn't stop. 

Ilya felt lost. He'd read all the books and sat with Shane when he went over the research he had found, listened closely. They had said that 'sometimes babies cry' but surely the wailing wasn't normal?

"Maybe she doesn't like the smell of your clothes?" Shane suggested, and then frowned. "That sounds stupid, sorry." 

"Is not stupid." Ilya said, sniffing his shirt. He'd used his normal body wash, which did have a smell - but his clothes had been washed in the same baby safe detergent that they'd used on all the clothes that they had bought for Karina. Shane thought it would be helpful so they all smelled the same. That smell was an important part of memory. 

"Do you want me to try?" Shane asked, hovering close. Ilya paused. He wanted to hold her, he wanted to be the one who soothed her. However it obviously wasn't working. Yuna and David were talking in the kitchen with Svetlana, and Ilya had the sudden insight that they had left the two of them to deal with this - to work through it themselves without swooping in to help. He appreciated it, and resented it at the same time. 

"Yeah, you try." Ilya nodded, putting the bottle down on the couch and carefully scooting to the edge of his seat to allow Shane to take her from his arms. 

"Okay, okay." Shan soothed as he carefully took her into his arms. It was awkward at first, and Ilya noted that Shane knew how to hold her correctly without being shown. He'd told Ilya that he was used to babies - his best friend was Hayden Pike after all. The man had like 10 thousand of them. 

The crying didn't stop. 

Ilya was oddly relieved. It wasn't him that was the issue. Shane looked worried, and seeing the expression on his face made Ilya feel guilty. He was trying to help and Ilya was... happy...? that Karina was still crying in Shanes arms.

Shane did the same little bouncy wiggle walk that his mother had done. It didn't seem to do much at first, but after a few moments, the volume of her cries lowered slightly. "Oh, hello, Karina," Shane soothed. "Welcome home. Your papa is so happy to meet you." He said. "I'm Shane - um, I'm your... other... daddy?" He glanced over at Ilya and shrugged. "Is that... okay with you?" He asked, looking nervous. They hadn't actually talked about what Shane would be called.

Ilya nodded. He didn't trust his voice. Watching Shane hold his daughter made him more emotional. He could feel the lump in his throat get bigger. She looked so small in his arms, but safe. 

"Okay." Shane nodded. "Other daddy. Thats me. This is your house. Papa wanted to get you a nice new house, with a big garden." She was calming down. Ilya stood up and walked beside Shane as he talked. "Papa has been waiting for you." Shane told her. He wasn't using a 'baby voice', just his regular voice, but it was working. Her crying was just little hiccups now. "Papa and I got your room all ready - you've got a nice new bed, and clothes."

"And toys." Ilya added. She didn't cry at the sound of his voice, but did turn her head a little at the sound of him talking. Shane shot him a look - go on, he urged with his eyes. "Uh, Papa - thats me - um, I wanted you to like it here." Her crying had completely stopped. She wasn't really looking at them, her large eyes were wet and dark. "You are in Ottawa now." He said. If the talking made her stop crying, then he'd find something to talk about until he lost his voice. "Papa plays hockey. Daddy too. Papa is much better than daddy. More handsome too." 

"Fuck you." Shane snorted. Karina was watching both of them, quiet at last.

Ilya glared at him. "No swearing in front of Kroshka."

"Krosh-ka?"

"Is... tiny. Like crumb." Ilya shrugged. "Is new rule - no swears." 

For some reason, that made Shane laugh softly. At the questioning look Ilya threw him, he grinned. "Jackie made the same rule for Hayden when Ruby and Jade were born." He admitted. "He sucks at keeping it. They have a swear jar." He said. Ilya hooked his head on Shanes shoulder so he could wrap his arms around him from behind and Karina could look at them both. "I'm pretty sure it'll be what puts the girls through college." 

Ilya rolled his eyes. Shane couldn't see, but Karina could, and Ilya felt like she'd appreciate it. "This is nice." He whispered. Just standing with Shane in his arms, Karina here and safe. It felt right. It felt real. 

His family. 

Chapter 4

Chapter Notes

Shane was gone after only 4 days of the 7 he had planned. The Metros were pushing for his return hard, and Ilya knew how Shane felt when he was being guilted into doing something. He wasn't technically injured - although his hip was still black and blue - but the Metros never really cared too much about that. Shane was the captain, and they wanted that third cup. He'd been pissed, had pushed back more than Ilya had expected. He'd overheard a conversation that he was pretty sure he wasn't supposed to - Shane had been telling whomever was on the other side that 'if they weren't going to value his physical health then he would seriously be considering if he was valuable to the franchise at all.' It had been kinda sexy. 

Ilya was lucky that the Raiders had been more understanding when he'd explained what was going on. A new baby was something everyone understood, and this one wasn't expected. They'd been more than happy to keep it out of the news. He was officially out with a 'lower body injury' and would be back in two weeks. 

But he missed Shane. He really fucking missed him. And Karina seemed to pick up on his absence, which Ilya knew couldn't possibly be true, but it felt like she kept turning her head to look for her daddy. He wasn't without support though, Yuna and David had been over every day, helping with little things that Ilya was struggling to find time to do. He didn't know how he was supposed to keep the kitchen tidy when it felt like Karina was allergic to being put down. He'd taken to just carrying her around in the weird sling thing Yuna had shown him how to wrap around his body. If he put his daughter down for more than a second, she started screaming. 

And she would not stop. 

It was easier just to wait for David to show up and hand her off so he could use the bathroom. He smelt weird, and realised it was because there was puke down his back. He'd won a Stanley cup on game 7 and he was pretty sure he'd once partied for three solid days in Berlin once, and he was 100% sure that he'd never been as tired as he was 10 days into Karina arriving into his life. 

Marlow had shown up - absolutely confused as to why Ilya had bought a house in fucking Ottawa when he had a perfectly awesome place in Boston - but he'd brought gifts and cards and well wishes from those who knew. And Ilya knew, knew, that he'd read a text at like 3am one morning and sent his address. He knew there had been something about coming over to visit, but he had completely forgotten all about it. 

Until Cliff Marlow was at his front door and holding out his arms for a hug. Shit. 

"Dude, She's fucking tiny." Marlow said, as Ilya handed her over to his friend. "I'm gonna break her."

"Just hold." Ilya sighed. "If I don't piss now I won't till Yuna comes," and ran to the toilet. "No swears!" He threw over his shoulder. "Is loonie per."

"The fuck is a loonie?"

When he came back, Marlow was holding her like she was a live bomb - which after changing several diapers, Ilya was sure she was - and he couldn't help the laugh. "You look like you want to pass out." He commented, grinning widely. He'd managed to brush his teeth and hair, and had thrown on a new shirt that didn't have puke on it. It was weird how much it changed his mood. Now if he could get a coffee or 10 he'd make it till naptime. 

"Fuck, dude. She's weirdly like you, man. Like she's got your whole mouth. It's fuckin weird." 

Ilya sighed. "You will Venmo for swears. She's too young to hear them. If first word is curse I will kill." 

Marlow laughed, but seemed a little more comfortable holding her now, so Ilya let him keep her. "So." He said, after a while, following Ilya around as he took the opportunity to pick up everything he'd left at his ass that morning while Karina was occupied. "How'd it go?"

"What go?" He asked, around a yawn that cracked his jaw loudly. Damn, he needed a nap. 

"With Montreal Jane?" Marlow said, looking at Karina and back to him. "You kept saying how pissed they were going to be with you." 

"Oh, was fine." Ilya said, waiving a hand. "Everything worked out. Mama was from when we weren't... together. I don't cheat."

"And she just... was cool with it?"

Ilya paused. "Eh," He said, holding out his hand and waving it a little. "Not... perfect, but we had plan for... uh, us?" He paused. "Rina doesn't change plan." 

Marlow gave a low whistle. "She's a keeper. Can't think of a hook-up who would want to play mommy to someone else's baby." 

"Is my baby." Ilya snapped, which shocked both of them. "I mean..."

"No, no, dude. Fuck, that was out of line. I just meant that, like, she's a good one." 

"Yes." Ilya shrugged. "Sorry. Am very tired." 

Marlow looked like he was about to say something else, but they were interrupted by the front door opening. Yuna arrived into the kitchen a few seconds later, a bag of groceries and extra diapers. Karina always needed more than he expected. "Oh!" She said, seeing Marlow. 

"Yuna, is Marlow." Ilya waved a hand. "Has not dropped your granddaughter yet." He yawned. "Owes $5 to swear jar. Forgot to say he was coming." He paused. "Forgot he was coming." He shrugged. "Marlow, is Yuna. Is saving life most days. Treat like queen, is keeping your captain alive." 

"Um, hi." Marlow said, looking confused. "Pleasure to meet you." 

Ilya watched as Karina did her best impression of a dying fish in Marlows arms when Yuna spoke. She was very fond of her babu. "Lovely to meet you. Let me take her off your hands so you two can catch up." She smiled, easily scooping up a wriggling Karina with a practiced move. "David is just bringing in the rest of the shopping, and then we thought we'd take her for a walk, let you shower?" She said, turning to Ilya, who nodded. He wasn't sure how he would have managed to survive the last 10 days without them. It was a lot easier when Shane was there. Fuck, he missed Shane. "Okay Rina, lets get you dressed for a walk." She said, walking out of the kitchen, bouncing Karina gently. "Ilya, can you make up a bottle for the bag?" 

"Has been fed already." He called back, but he started putting together a bottle anyway. If she was going to scream, a bottle might distract her. It worked about 9% of the time. That made it more than worth it, statistically. 

"Uh," Marlow said, looking at the door Yuna had left through. "Granddaughter?" 

"Yes?" 

"Dude." His friend whispered, leaning forward. "What the fuck?" 

Ilya blinked slowly. "What?"

Marlow looked at him like he had two heads. "That's Janes mom?"

Oh.

"Yes?"

"Your banging Shane Hollanders sister?! Are you fucking insane?!" 

Oh.

Fuck. 

Ilya was suddenly very, very awake. "Um," He managed. His heart was racing, but his brain seemed to have forgotten how to work. "Is, um... Not... That?"

"Dude, I thought she had something to do with the fucking Metros because she was always around when we played em, but fucking hell Ilya, no wonder he fucking hates your guts." He laughed. "Jesus fuck. Your a fucking legend. Fuck me. His sister?" He glanced at the door. "Fucking hell. Thats Yuna Hollander." He breathed, sounding awed and a little scared. "She's a fucking powerhouse." 

"Look, Marlow-"

"Oh shit, no wonder you are keeping that quiet." Marlow breathed. "Fuck, thats gonna be a fucking nuke when people find out." 

"Marlow-"

"You absolute mad-man. Jane Hollander. Fuck. I didn't even know he had a sister. He kept that quiet." A paused. "Not quiet enough though, eh?" A wink. Ilya was going to throw up. 

"Marlow-"

"Fucking fuck." Marlow said, then laughed. "I'm gonna be putting your kid through college, Rozy." 

"Marlow-" 

"I'll keep it quiet, obviously." He added. "Wow. Although they are from here, right? So thats why you live out in bumfuck nowhere. Smart. I bet she's hot. I knew she'd be hot with how whipped you are, but like... Hollander hot... thats something."

"Marlow."

"How'd that even happen, man?" Marlow said, looking impressed and excited. He also looked like he was going to keep talking. "His fucking sister, I mean-"

"He doesn't have a fucking sister!" Ilya snapped. "Stop talking. You are giving me headache. I need to think." 

Marlow stopped talking. Ilya could see he wasn't offended, which... was good? He still looked like he was bursting at the seams with forbidden knowledge though. Fuck. They stood in the kitchen for a moment, only to be interrupted by David carrying more groceries. Well fuck his whole day. 

"Hey son," David said, somehow missing the towering presence of Cliff Marlow in the room. "Shane said you were out of cokes, and I couldn't remember if you liked regular or diet, so I got both." He put the paper bags on the counter, turning to the fridge. Still not seeing Cliff. Ilya hoped Yuna drove them there, because he sure as fucking wasn't letting him take Rina anywhere if his eyesight was that bad. He could be a Metros Referee with that peripheral vision. "They were out of the all dressed chips you like, sorry. Had to get the wholewheat ones." 

"Thanks David." Ilya sighed. Marlow looked like he was doing complicated math in his head. "Meet Cliff Marlow." Because why not? What else could make this afternoon worse?

"Hi." 

"Oh, I'm... sorry." David said, turning and looking adorably confused - so thats where Shane got that look, huh. "Hello." He held his hand out like a very polite Canadian who worked for the Government. "How'd you do? Coke?"

"Thanks. Diet." Marlow paused. "Don't know how Roz drinks that full sugar shit, his blood sugar must be sky high." Christ. Ilya carefully placed his head on the counter and prayed for the baby jesus to save him from Marlow trying to be jovially friendly. 

David smiled. Ilya knew that David didn't give a flying fuck about hockey, he actively avoided most of it unless it had effected Shane directly, so he honestly didn't think David recognised Marlow. "Very true! I try to limit myself to one soda a day, but they make it addictive for a reason." He handed Cliff a coke right from the grocery bag and patted Ilya on the shoulder. "You doing okay there, kiddo?"

"Fine." He said, keeping his head on the cold marble.

"How's Karina been? You managed to get her down for a nap so far today?"

"Nope." He knew he was hiding. Hiding in plain sight in his kitchen, with his almost father-in-law patting his shoulder and his best friend being very obviously confused and trying to work through it with his normal American friendliness. 

"So, you've been helping Rozy a lot with the buba?" He asked, while Ilya wondered if Shane might just kill him for real this time. Amazing. He'd been gone for less than a week. 

David smiled again, hand still rubbing a comforting circle on Ilyas shoulder, just like he did with Shane when he spiralled. Not pushing, just grounding. A way to show support without being obnoxiously hovering. "Well, we want to be as helpful as possible." 

"Gotta be nice, with Rozy moving out here." 

"It certainly does make things a lot easier." David said, and Ilya was grateful that despite being half blind, David wasn't stupid. He was being very good at not saying anything damning. "Well, I'll go find Yuna and see if we can't get out of your hair." He patted Ilyas shoulder again. "Let you catch up."

"Okay." Ilya mumbled. 

Getting Karina ready for her walk - which was a stroller around the local park - was always a little stressful for Ilya. He didn't like her being out of his sight. Luckily, Yuna was terrifyingly efficient and soon he was urgently whispering at her to get David's fucking eyes checked because he needed glasses as they walked out of the house. 

Leaving Ilya to deal with Cliff Marlow. 

"So... if you aren't banging Shane Hollanders sister, why are his parents helping you with your kid?" He asked once the door was closed. He didn't sound... mad. Cliff wasn't stupid, Ilya knew. He was big and loud and people sometimes thought that meant he was dumb - and he let people think that because it was easier and made him seem less threatening. 

"How do you know who Yuna is?" Ilya asked. "WHY do you know?"

Marlow looked at him like he'd lost his brain, which might have happened. "Dude, she's like - scary good at her job. Who the fuck gets a sneaker deal before playing a fuckin game? She got Hollander a fucking Rolex spon in his rookie year. My agent talks about her like she walks on water. Fuck, is she taking over your management? Is she looking for other clients?"

Ilya nodded. "Yeah, she's actually my manager now." He said. That wasn't a lie. She'd been the one to sit with him and go over the Centaurs offer. How they were going to spin it for something other than a demotion to a piss poor team. Which Cliff knew nothing about. No one knew anything about. "Okay. I need a drink." He paused. "Fuck. Okay. Follow me."

Ilya walked into the living room and collapsed onto the couch. He had meant to just sit, but his body gave up half way down and he just fell into the cushions. Cliff followed, coke in hand. He sat down much more gracefully than Ilya and took a sip. "Rozy, you know your my best friend, right?"

"Yeah."

"And I want to be there for you, yeah?"

"Yeah."

"And like, you just became a dad so I've been letting you get like, acclimatised, to that. But dude - you fucking move to Ottawa. You have a whole ass house here. What the fuck, man." Marlow waved an arm. "And Yuna and David Hollander just took your baby for a walk like they do it every day." He paused. "And like, dude, they treat you like their kid."

"Okay." Ilya sighed. "Need to check something." 

He pulled his phone out of his pocket, which required a little wriggling on his side. Quickly he sent a text to Shane.

Ilya: Marlow showed up, same time as your parents. Sorry. He's about to work it out on his own.

He sat in silence for a few moments before Shane replied.

Jane: Fuck. Okay.

"Okay." He took a breath. "Firstly, you tell no one. Second, you tell no one." He waited for Marlow to nod. "Hollander doesn't have sister. Is only child." He ran a hand over his face. Fuck he was so tired. This was precious nap time he was missing for a conversation he didn't want to have. "Jane is... fuck. Okay. Jane is Shane." 

Marlow nodded. He looked... like he was thinking. A lot. "You're... with? Shane Hollander?" Slow. Questioning. 

"Is long term... relationship."

"How long term?"

"Summer before draft." 

"Fuck me." Cliff whispered. His expression changed a little. "Holy shit. Rose Landry."

Ilya ran another hand over his face. "What."

"He was dating Rose fucking Landry." Marlow said. "Last... year..." More complicated math. "Oh fuck. He was dating her and we were in... Tampa." He stared. "Did he cheat on you with Rose fucking Landry? Oh god." He said, looking scandalised. "You got that fucking girl from the club... the... dark haired... one. Holy shit - she fucking looked like him." 

"We weren't together then."

"You said since rookie-"

"We were... not talking."

"Cause he cheated?"

"No. She was after."

"Okay. Thats good. He doesn't seem the cheating type. Um."

"What?"

"So like... You, um. Probably didn't want anyone to find out, right? Cause... you know I don't give a shit about who you fuck but like... Shane Hollander."

Ilya nodded. "Is not ideal. He's not... No one knows."

"Yeah, fuck no. Shit. You know this means that in the last... 4 years..." His voice trailed off. "Shit. Every fucking team who've lifted a cup in the last 4 years has had a gay captain."

"Am bi." 

"Yeah but like, I fucking knew being queer was a life hack." He grinned. "Fucking A." Then: "Damn. Shane Hollander. You don't do shit by halves, huh?"

"You can't tell an-"

"Yeah, fuck that." Marlow shrugged. "I wont say shit."

Ilya sighed, some of the tension seeping out of him. "Is... more." He admitted. "You might be less happy."

Chapter End Notes

Just a quick note:
Did I do any research about the length of a hockey season? NO
Do I have a timeline for when events happened in this story? NO
Do I know anything about babies? NO
Did I learn anything about hockey, or professional sports and the contracts within? NO.

I write fiction, not well thought out fiction.

(and if you aren't writing because you are worried that people will pick apart your facts, do as I do and stick your fingers in your ears and say 'lalalala' very loudly)

Chapter 5

Chapter Notes

Marlow was still crying into his shoulder when Shane called. Ilya had always knows Cliff was a big softie, but the tears had been a bit of a shock, especially as Ilya leaving the Raiders put him in prime position to become captain in his absence. 

"Dude, you're my fucking best friend. Your my rook, man." He said, voice thick with emotion. 

Ilya pushed him away, only to find that a crying Marlow was apparently made of Velcro and would not be budged. "I haven't been rookie for 8 years, idiot."

"In my fucking soul, you're still my rook." Marlow bubbled. 

"I need to answer this." He said, picking up his phone which was vibrating on the table. He leaned forward, Marlow following his body and then hugging him too tightly when he leaned back. 

"Is it Hollander? Tell him I fucking hate his guts. The fucking Centaurs. I'm losing my captain to a fucking horse-dork bullshit team because of him."

"Shane. Is bad time." Ilya managed, picking up. 

"Is it a problem?" Shane sounded out of breath, like he'd ran to find somewhere private as soon as he'd been able, which was probably exactly what he did. 

"Oh, he is fine with the whole relationship thing." Ilya said, only to be cut off with an aggressively loud sniff into his shoulder. "Its the 'moving teams' thing is struggle."

"Is... are you okay?" He sounded stressed. He probably was. Ilya felt bad - he was too tired to be stressed. 

"Am fine. Tired. Forgot he said he was coming. Sorry."

"He wont tell anyone, right?" It was probably a good sign that Shane had asked that question second. Normally any thought of someone finding out and telling people was first on his mind. Maybe parenthood was mellowing him. 

"Nah, is also too fond of dick to say anything."

"Hey!"

"Shut up. You are crying more than Rina."

"You cant just out me to Shane Hollander!" Cliff said, head snapping up. His nose was running and eyes were red rimmed. "That's fucking Shane Hollander! And I'm not gay."

"I just told you am in 9 year relationship with stupid boring Hollander, idiot. Have you forgot the amount of times I catch you watching porn?"

"That's just porn."

"Its gay porn."

"Its research." 

"Research into how much you like dick?"

"Shut up." A pause. "Shit, They're gonna make me captain. I'm not ready to be fucking captain, Rozy. I've never even sucked dick, how can I get a cup win if I've never sucked dick, dude?"

"I am very confused." Shane said on the other side of the phone, but at least he didn't sound as panicked. He sounded adorably fond. And very far away. Fuck Ilya missed him. 

"Marlow thinks only gay men win Stanley cups."

"Look all I'm saying is, you got one-"

"Am Bi-"

"Whatever, you got one, then Hollander got two - maybe because he's like all the way gay? - and then Scott Hunter got dicked down and won a cup. Fuck. Is he all the way gay too? Cause I don't think I can live through them winning again." 

"What does he mean all the way-"

"Shh, Shane. Are you... do you think I only win one cup because I'm not gay?"

"I mean, he has a point." Shane cut in. 

"You are statistical anomaly!" Ilya snarked. "Shane is not winning cup because of how well he takes dick." He said, shoving Marlow off his shoulder good naturedly. 

"Oh, so like, he... um." Cliff mumbled, and then frowned. "Maybe its like a top-bottom thing. Maybe Hunter only tops and that's why he'll only get one?"

"Marlow, shut your stupid mouth before you break brain permanently." 

"I'm pretty sure his brain already sounds broken." Shane commented dryly. Ilya didn't realise he'd been holding tension in his shoulders until it evaporated at the sound of Shane being okay enough to make a joke. 

"No, is mostly how he is always." Ilya smiled fondly. "How was practice?"

Shane sighed. "Fine."

"Sounds very fine."

Shane weighed up the mental energy he had to fight Ilya being annoying and made up his mind. "I just... Its bullshit." He said after taking a deep breath. "I didn't really notice how much I was just overlooking until I can't look the other way." He paused. "Every fucking day someone makes a joke about Hunter, and I just keep my head down because I can't say shit." 

Ilya frowned. Shane sounded tired in a way that Ilya hadn't expected. Marlow, who was sitting back but probably could hear what Shane was saying because he was almost in his lap. 

"And Hayden keeps trying to get them to stop, but coach doesn't... He thinks its motivating." The way Shane said the last word sounded like a curse. It probably was. "You know, like, we can't be getting beat by a fag."

"Thats fucked." Marlow whispered. 

Ilya nodded. The plan was that Shane kept his head down. Played for the Metros. Kept winning cups. Then retire. The plan... didn't really take into account feelings like that. "You... are okay though?"

"Huh? Oh yeah." Shane lied. Ilya knew he was lying. "How's Karina been today?" The change of subject was obvious, but Ilya wasn't awake enough to really push Shane for answers. Not with Marlow sitting glued to his side. 

"Is good so far. Woke up at 4, misses you - will not be put down even for naps still." Ilya yawned. "Your parents have taken for walk." 

Shane gave a little sigh. "I miss her." Ilya could almost see Shane, his head leaning back, eyes closed, thinking about his family. 

"We miss you too."

Marlow was kind enough to let Ilya have a shower and he fell asleep on the couch after while Cliff watched tv on low volume. He was still sleeping when Yuna and David arrived, and when he woke up it was to the quiet sounds of voices in another room. For a moment, he thought it was Shane, and his heart gave a painful thump before his brain caught up. 

He padded through to the kitchen - Yuna and Cliff were chatting together about his move to the Centaurs, and David was keeping Karina occupied on one of the tummy time mats. 

"Feel more alive?" Yuna asked when she spied him at the door. When he nodded sleepily, she pointed to the breakfast bar where a loaded wrap and salad was waiting for him, "Coke in the fridge." 

"Thank you." He sighed, before sliding into the seat and trying to remember his manners and not just inhale the entire thing in a single bite. "How was walk?"

Yuna smiled. "Good. We looped around the park and saw some ducks, and then we stopped at a café for a bite to eat, and to change her. Marlow said Shane called?"

"Yes." Ilya said, mouth full of the chicken wrap David had probably made. "Is all good." 

"I told her I'd keep my mouth shut about the trade too." Marlow added. "I've got your back, cap." 

"We've been going over some logistics." Yuna advised, nodding her head at Marlow. "Cliff is the most reasonable replacement for the Raiders captain, and it gives him a lot more sponsorship opportunities going forward."

Cliff was looking at him with eyes that screamed 'fucking Yuna Hollander is talking to me about sponsorship opportunities, I might cry again' and Ilya nodded. 

"Will be good captain." He admitted, but quickly added "As long as keeps head out of ass." Because he had a reputation to maintain. "Will never be as good as me, but no one is." 

"Shane is currently beating you in points and assists."

"Shane is currently actively playing." Ilya pointed out. "I am on paternity leave. Will be back to beating him in..." He gave a long sigh. "4 days. Fuck." He wasn't ready to go back. He wasn't ready to leave Rina with her grandparents and go back on the road. He'd wondered if it would be possible to take her. He'd talked about it with Shane, but they both knew it wasn't possible. If he wanted to end his career with the Raiders on a high then he'd have to lock in for the rest of the season, and as much as he loved his daughter, it wouldn't be possible. It didn't stop him from thinking about it. 

David looked up from where he was sitting on the floor, and smiled at him. "It'll be okay, kid. She'll be in good hands." He held up his hands and wiggled his fingers in front of Karina. "Baba and Jiiji will take good care of you, wont we?"

Ilya nodded. Fuck. He wasn't going to cry about going back to work - a game that he got paid stupid amounts of money to play - just because he was going to miss his little girl. He sniffed, and carried on eating. If anyone noticed his eyes were a little misty, no one said anything. 

"So, Cliff - who is your agent currently negotiating for you with?"

Chapter End Notes

So this is just a little short one because I love Cliff Marlow and I HC him as a baby Bi who hasn't actually acted on anything (yet)
I know a lot of people HC Pike like that but I don't see a lot of Marlow.

Thank you for all the kind comments, and I'm glad to see my lack of anything resembling research isn't GLARINGLY obvious!
Today I did google when babies laugh though, and apparently its at like 3-4 MONTHS. That's certainly not the canonically 3 weeks that Rina is in this story, lmao.

Anyway, hope this keeps you tided over for a couple days!

In the meantime you should read these two WIP fics I'm low-key obsessed with:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/77463356 - Boston Boys by xpityx
https://archiveofourown.org/works/77390061 - (We could be) Something Great by Anonymous

Chapter 6

Chapter Notes

Ilya all but collapsed through his door. He'd met his team in Vegas after his leave was up and then have a brutal 4 game roadie. 

He hurt everywhere. His hip was screaming from a bad check in New York - Hunter might be older than the rings on Mars, but it seemed to have turned his bones into rocks. Fossils? Something denser than bone, anyway. He'd almost flipped him over the fucking plexiglass. Clean hit, but nasty. Ilya hadn't even chirped him more than normal - in fact, he'd been very careful to make sure that he chirped him exactly as he always had. Told him on centre ice that he was happy he'd found someone who didn't mind his dentures and hairline. Maybe he should have been a little more... clear, in his support for his cute little sugar baby. 

Fuck, Ilya missed his baby. 

He'd checked in with Yuna and David so much David had to tell him to stop texting and calling so they could actually look after her. He'd been sent hourly updates and pictures, and he tried to convince his heart that it wasn't breaking every time he looked at her tiny fat face. She was putting on weight, which was good. Yuna said Shane had been the fattest little baby she'd ever seen - and he'd seen those baby pictures after begging relentlessly. She'd laughed and told him fat babies were a good thing - they need all the calories possible with how quickly they could grow. 

Ilya was praying she didn't grow too much when he was away from her. His heart could not take it. 

The house was spotless. He'd hired a cleaner who picked up his mail and put it on the breakfast bar. A couple of packages from brands that kept trying to court him - mostly junk that he was letting Yuna deal with now. One where he instantly clocked the fucking terrible chicken scratch of one Shane Hollander. The return address was a PO box. The name was Jane Holl. Trust Shane to be paranoid about a return address.

Ilya loved Shane. He loved him so much he got stupid with it. But the mans penmanship was atrocious. Vile. Some of the worse he'd even seen. For a man who made so many fucking lists, it was practically impossible to read. He'd spent far too long making fun of Shane about it. Shane had just shrugged. 

"It's just writing."

"It looks like little bugs shitting on page."

"Not everyone writes like a fucking Disney princess, Ilya."

"You think I write like royal? Thank you, Shane. Is true." He'd preened. "Will serenade you with little blue birds and squirrels while trying to read grocery list made by mouse droppings."

"Fuck off."

"Never." He grinned, before grabbing at Shane and kissing him. 

The package was light, and Ilya ripped into it without care. He knew that Shane had a little key fob that was a box cutter. It seemed so strange to Ilya that the type of person he fell in love with had a special key fob for boxes because it was useful to have on hand when you got home. 

A wrapped box and a small card fell onto the table as he mauled the cardboard. 

His mama told him it was polite to read the card before opening gifts, so he picked up the card. It was plain white card with Shanes bad handwriting. 

I know you wont get this until you get home, but I wanted you to have a little bit of home with you on the ice. Love you - Jane. 

The plain blue wrapping paper was ripped to shreds in an instant, the thrill of Shane buying him something and sending it to him making his heart beat a little faster. He was very, very pleased that Shane wasn't watching him unwrap the gift because he knew his face fell. 

Shane was oddly hit and miss with gifts. Sometimes he'd get something so fucking perfect it seemed like he was living in your brain, but then other times he'd give his father a voucher to the local Bass Pro shop. 

So Ilya wasn't expecting something... magical, but he wasn't expecting CCM tongue inserts for his skates. Boston Raiders ones that he could get himself because CCM were one of his fucking sponsors, and the Raiders were his fucking team. 

There was another card in the box, so he pulled out the tongues and stopped when he noticed something... glitter. On the back of the inserts there was gold embroidery. 

Karina Svetlana Rosanov, stitched in gold, with her date of birth under. On the other, a set of words that would mean very little to anyone else. 1410 & 1221 - Jane & Lily.

Shane knew no one would ever see this. Both of them played with tongues up.

The bottom of the box there was a photograph. Shanes skates, Metros branded CCM tongues, with gold stitching on the back. In sharpie written in his horrible writing - we match!

Ilya really fucking loved Shane. 

Chapter End Notes

Did I write my chapter direct into the 'add chapter' feature?
Did I have to fight Indie Mowse (10 yrs old tuxedo terror feline) over space on my desk?
Did he deliberately stand on the keyboard and press down on F5 to spite me not letting him use my computer screen as a scratching post?
Did this refresh the page and wipe the entire thing?
Did I then have to re-write the entire chapter, cursing my horrible son?

Obviously not.
I am a professional.

This is a tiny chapter because ... other reasons.

Chapter 7

Chapter Notes

Shane called before his game against New York. Ilya immediately knew there was a problem - Shane would never fuck up his pre-game ritual with a call. Ilya pushed his luck a few times with texts when they were about to face one another but that was because he knew Shane would be expecting him to flirt before any game they played against each other. 

"What's wrong?"

He said - glad that no one gave him another look in his own locker room. His pre-game was non-existent. 

"I fucked up." Shane wheezed, obviously mid panic attack. "I fucked everything up so bad."

He could hear yelling in the background - like down a hall or in another room - he was pretty sure he could hear Pike yelling at people to shut the fuck up. He had no idea where Shane was. "Hang on." He waved a hand to Marlow, "I have to take this, is Jane."

The hallway outside of the home changing rooms was always busy before a game so he ran to the one place he knew he wouldn't be disturbed. Locking the door on the disabled staff toilets, he started talking. 

"Okay, Shane, you need to breathe. You need to calm down and tell me what is going on." 

He could hear the laboured breathing, loud and wheezing - Shane obviously trying to regulate it and failing. "Fuck, Ilya, I fucked up so bad." He sounded like he was crying, or dying. Maybe both. 

"Okay, is probably not as bad as you think." He soothed. "Your brain is-" he was cut off mid sentence with a broken gasp.

"I told them I was gay." 

Ilyas brain short-circuited. Shane had been unhappy with the Metros behaviour, but he was also very dedicated to his plan. His plan. The plan he made, then sat with his mother and polished till it might as well have been set in stone. "Okay, Shane, okay." He said, and started texting Yuna. "I need you to breathe and then we can work out what to do-"

"I can't do shit!" Shane half yelled. The volume in the background was getting louder. Pike was definitely yelling, he pulled the phone from his ear and typed franticly.

Shane just came out to team. is bad. help. Sending the text, he put the phone back up to his ear. 

"Okay-"

"Stop saying okay!" Shane gasped. "Its not fucking okay!"

"Shane. You need to breathe - you need to tell me what is going on." He tried. "I can't help if not knowing."

He heard the deep breath Shane took before he started talking. Ilya know for a fact he was probably fisting his hand in his hair, pulling at the soft strands till they threatened to come away in his fingers. He'd seen Shane have a panic attack before - knew how he fought for control. His fucking heart was breaking - half a country away and unable to help. 

"They were talking shit." He started. "About Hunter, talking about how they didn't even want to share the ice." Another breath. "And then Olsson said he couldn't even fight him because he might fucking bleed on him." 

Fuck.

"And everyone knows he's probably got fucking AIDS because he's gay." 

Oh no. 

"And JJ said to shut up, that it wasn't cool."

Ilya was starting to sweat. 

"Then Beaulier asked why JJ gave a fuck, unless he was bending over and taking it too-"

His phone buzzed with an incoming message. 

"And I told them both to shut up because they started bitching at each other, and... fuck... and Theriault said... he said..." A breath that seemed to catch. "He wanted to show Scott that this wasn't a sport for fags who suck dick."

Then Shane laughed. It wasn't a nice laugh, it was full of razorblades and bile. "And I just, snapped." A sniff. "Just looked at him and said 'that's weird, cause I'm the best player in the fucking league and I'm a fag who sucks dick just fine."

Ilyas mouth moved without any input from his brain. "Second best." 

"Are you fucking serious right now?" Shane snapped. "I've just nuked my fucking career and your gonna tell me second best?"

"Got you breathing though." Ilya said, and blinked. His heart was racing. His phone buzzed again. and again. His team were probably wondering where he was, despite Marlow covering. He was due on the ice in 15. Shane was due on the ice. He started laughing. "Shane. Shane, I fucking love you so much." 

There was a cut off laugh, that might have been Shane actually dying - when Ilya could hear the sound of yelling was too loud for a moment, and then it cut off - someone had opened and shut a door. "Shane?" Pike could be heard, and Ilya braced for the worst. "Shane are you fucking okay? Fuck. Are you having a panic attack?"

"I have to go." 

"I love you." Ilya said, hoping that somehow the words helped. There wasn't shit he could do from a bathroom in Boston. 

"I love you too." 

The line went dead. 

Ilya walked back into the locker room on autopilot. 

"Is everything okay?" Marlow asked, looking at him with concern. Ilya had no idea what his face looked like. Manic probably. 

Fuck it. 

"Okay, listen up everyone!" He yelled in the general chaos that was the Raiders locker loom 10 minutes before a game. The hush was instant. "I am hearing things from other teams. I am hearing some players are not liking Scott Hunter." He paused. "I am not fan. You know this. He is old, yes - knees are creaking like old floors." A smattering of laughs. Some confused looks. They weren't playing New York. They were hosting San Jose. "But I will tell you this right now," He said, looking at each of them, men he knew, rookies he looked out for. "If am hearing one fucking word about him being gay - one word - I will break legs and make it look like accident." 

"Jesus Roz." Marlow said. 

"I am saying this now - you know me. You all fucking know me. I like girls, yes, I have lots of girls."

Someone, he thought might be Dubek, muttered "Rub it in, for fuck sake." under their breath. He ignored it. 

"Is not just girls. Am Bi. If is problem, you tell me right the fuck now." 

No one said anything. A couple of people exchanged looks. 

"Um, Cap?" One of the rookies said, holding up a hand like he was in fucking school. Ilya nodded at him, waving at him to go ahead. "Uh, my sister's gay. Um. A lesbian, I mean."

"Aw, I've got like three gay cousins." Sebby added. 

"Three?"

"Fuck off, dude - we're Irish catholic, I've got like a hundred of em. An one of my nieces used to be a boy." A pause. "You wouldn't believe the amount of shit my sister had to go through with that. People are fucking dicks."

"I bet."

"So is not problem?" Ilya asked. 

"Fuck no, Cap." 

"Hell nah, Rozzy." 

"And if anyone says shit, I'll help ya hide the body." Marlow added, slapping him on the back. 

Chapter End Notes

I know a lot of people might think this is very out of character for Shane, however I've found that a lot of ND people have a couple things in common: A strong sense of social justice and an inability to shut the fuck up about it.
(its me, I'm the ND people)
I also think that if things build up to a level you can no longer stand - in a place where you can see your work is being taken for granted, where you are forced to go back before you are ready, separated from your new-born and are generally DONE with the people around you...
you will snap.
So yeah.

a short one because I'm hungry and I should go make food.

Chapter 8

Ilya had Scott Hunters number. He didn't know why - had exactly zero memories about how it ended up in his phone, but fuck it. Shane was hurting and in trouble and he was in Boston. 

"Rosanov?" Scott said, sounding very fucking confused. Ilya could hear the locker room in the background. "Why-"

"Hollander needs your help."

There was a sound on the other side of the line and then absolute silence. "What?"

"You need to get to Hollander. Now."

"Wh-"

"You are old and deaf and now are being stupid!" Ilya snapped. "I am on ice in 5 minutes and I can't do shit from Boston. You need to find Shane right now."

There was a moment. "Where?"

"Outside lockers. Might be with Pike. Get him away from team. Tell no one. Tell Pike that you know Lily and will help." He paused. "Listen to me, Hunter - get him away from team now."

"Okay."

"I send you his mothers number. Go now."

Scott Hunter ran through the tunnels under the stands, before turning a corner and seeing Pike looming over Hollander, who was on the ground. He had absolutely no idea what the fuck was going on, and he certainly didn't like Rosanov, but he knew what panic sounded like. Something was wrong.

"Hollander?"

Pike's head snapped around. He looked pissed as hell. "Fuck off Hunter." He snarled. "Get the fuck out of here."

"Scott?" Shane said, looking up. He looked like absolute shit, eyes wide and wild, hair standing up in every direction. He was dressed in his underlayers but only half his pads. 

"I know Lily." He managed, and watched how it seemed to soften the expression on Pikes face, and hitch up the manic look on Hollanders. "I was told to get Hollander away from the team?"

In the locker room, he could hear yelling. A lot of yelling. "Fuck. Okay." Pike said, and grabbed Hollanders arm, physically hauling his captain to his feet. "Go."

"I can't-"

"Shane, you can't be here right now. Fuck sake."

"The gam-"

"They aren't going to let you fucking play, Shane!" Pike said, and shoved Hollander towards Scott. Shane stumbled a bit. He was in his fucking socks. 

"Okay." Scott said, grabbing Hollanders upper arm to keep him steady. "I'll take him to our locker?"

"Yeah, yeah okay. I need to call his mom, fuck." Pike looked frazzled. "I'll get his stuff sent over to you?"

Scott nodded. Hollander was starting to look like someone had died and his brain was shutting down one part at a time. He looked like he was going into shock. Pike gave them both a little shove and Scott started walking Hollander towards the guest lockers. They had just turned the corner when a door opened and a voice cracked out like a whip. "Pike, where the fuck is Hollander?"

"I don't know." Pike said. 

"Get the fuck in here."

"Hollander?" Scott asked, slowing down a little. "Why the fuck am I kidnapping you from your team?"

He wasn't expecting the answer. "I came out to my team."

Fuck. 

Scott felt like a bucket of ice water had just drenched him completely. He started walking faster. Montreal was a queer city, but he also knew locker room talk. For fucking Rosanov to call him and order him to get Hollander... what? Someplace safe? And why the fuck did Rosanov call him? The Raiders player was an absolute asshole who seemed to enjoy getting under Scotts skin more than anything else in life. The last game they played, he'd ramped up his dickishness to 100. Scott had been so fed up of the constant chirping about him being gay that he'd slammed the cocky shit hard into the boards. 

Looking back though... Rosanov hadn't said anything about him coming out. Had Scott just assumed he was being an asshole about Scott coming out when he was just... being his normal dick self? He'd also talked to him at the MLH awards, said it... fuck. 

Scott was a fucking moron. 

"Okay. Lets get you someplace... safe?"

They walked in silence, Scott towing a disassociating Hollander behind him like a loadstone. 

Opening the door to the locker room, the noise was a wall of sound. Pushing Hollander into the locker room, the entire room went silent. 

"Um." Someone said. 

"Hollander isn't playing tonight." Scott said, and steered the younger man into a bench, where he sat down like someone just cut his strings. "So he's just gonna sit here with us."

"The fuck he is." Coach Murdoc said, standing in the middle of the room. "What the hell? Your on the ice in 5 fucking minutes, Hunter. What the hell are you doing?"

Hollander looked up. He looked like shit. He looked like he wanted to die. Fuck, he looked like he had died and his body just hadn't caught up yet. "I, uh."

"You don't need to say anything." Scott cut in. 

Shane nodded. "Its.. its okay." Hollander said. He looked at Murdoc. "I just came out to my team." He said, and then blinked. "Um." 

Scott had no doubt that Murdoc was a good coach. He had no doubt that he was a good man. But his heart did skip a beat at the expression on his coaches face. The shock.

It rippled through the room like a rock thrown into a still pond. He was pretty sure he heard someone whisper 'holy shit'. 

Then Murdoc nodded. "I've met Theriault. Okay. Sit." He took a breath. "They scratch you?"

"Think so." Hollander said, looking like he was going to throw up. "Hayden said..."

"Pike said they weren't going to let him play." Scott said, when it became apparent that Hollander wasn't sure how to finish the sentence. 

Murdoc nodded. "Sounds like him. Okay." He sighed. "We're kidnapping Shane Hollander."

Someone laughed. "Fucking A."

"Right, we're up." Murdoc said. "Why don't we show these fuckers that benching Shane fucking Hollander was a mistake."

Scott looked over at Hollander. This kid was one of the best players hockey had ever seen, a rookie he'd been watching with so much pride - a kid who loved hockey as much as Scott did. And he was gay. The best hockey player in a generation was gay. And for some reason, Ilya fucking Rosanov knew and knew he'd need help. In real time. How the fuck did Rosanov know that Hollander would be in the hallway of MSG needing to be whisked to safety? At that exact time?

Jesus Christ. He was going to have to thank Rovanov. And then he was going to have to apologise. 

Chapter 9

Chapter Notes

Things moved very quickly for Ilya, but at the same time every thing seemed to drag. Before his game had started he'd received a text from Hunter to explain Shane was benched and was hiding out in the Admirals locker room in MSG, where the kit guys were keeping an eye on him and telling tall tales over the bad behaviour of his teammates. 

Yuna had text him to let him know that Karina was down for a nap and that she wasn't sure how the Metros were taking the news but if it was bad she was ready (Ilya had no doubt there were plans in place for every outcome. Shane and his mama had back-ups for back-ups.)

David had sent him a text to let him know that Shane had called from the Admirals locker and Yuna was three seconds away from flying to New York, but was being kept at bay by knowing that she could do more from her home office. David also thought she wouldn't want to leave Karina in Ottawa, so she was staying put. 

Shane hadn't text him at all, but he wasn't worried too much about that. He would be overwhelmed and adding on to that wouldn't help either of them. It was best for Ilya to focus on the game at hand, and then deal with the fallout after.  

He'd played San Jose Bull Sharks* and won.

He'd been shown the news results that Hollander hadn't played in New York and then he went back to his Boston place and freaked the fuck out for 15 solid minutes. Marlow had insisted on going back to his place with him. He let his friend rant for a solid then, then handed him a smoothie and a toffee and chocolate chip muffin and pointed Ilya at the couch, then left to order food from a local takeout that they both liked. 

Shane picked up on the first ring, like he was waiting for Ilya to call. He'd probably been expecting a call sooner. "Ilya?"

"Are okay?" English was always the first thing to go when he was stressed. Shane knew it, and wouldn't tease him about it. 

A snort on the other side told him what a stupid question that was. "Been better. You?"

"Worried."

"I didn't tell them about you," Shane said, "Don't worry-"

"Am worried for you. I told team about me, don't care about me." 

A pause. "Did they take it okay?"

"Yes." Ilya admitted. He felt bad about it. They had all been so understanding. Admittedly he hadn't told them about Shane but they'd been so fucking good about what they did know. "They were good about it. Lot of them have gay people."

"That's nice." Shane said, but Ilya could hear the hollowness in his tone. He knew Shane didn't want them to react badly, but it probably highlighted just how shit the Metros were being. 

"What... what is happening?" He asked. "With team, for you?"

"Well, so far I'm being fined for skipping the game. I think Theriault wants to bench me for the rest of the season but I don't think he can explain why without opening the team to a lawsuit. I'm at Scott's place right now." 

Ilya nodded. "Okay. Your mama text me to say she has plan."

"Yeah. I don't know what the plan is right now, but she called me, and I told her what happened." A humourless laugh. "I think this was one of the outcomes she'd prepared. Plan E or F or something." He paused. "I told Scott about you. He's... taking it about as well as you'd expect."

"Badly." Ilya guessed. 

"Not... not bad. I think he's just... taking it in." 

"Tell him I know he is too old for such a shock to system. Tell him to take his heart pills." Teasing helped, because he could hear Shane snort a laugh. 

"He's been nice."

"He is old pervert who likes younger men. Tell him to stay away. Are mine." 

Shane did laugh at that. "He absolutely has a boyfriend, Ilya, you know that."

"Hmmm. Do not trust Scott Hunter. He is always having soft spot for Shane Hollander." He paused. "Tell him I am very jealous and can break his face."

"I absolutely will not be doing that, Rosanov."

"Oh, am Rosanov now? You are alone with Hunter and I am Rosanov. Yes, am seeing how it is." Shane laughed down the line, a real laugh - and Ilya knew that it would make his nose scrunch up and eyes sparkle and he really wished he wasn't in fucking Boston. "I wish I was there."

"I wish you were here too," Shane said fondly. "But I think its probably a good thing you aren't. I don't want you dragged into this." 

Ilya closed his eyes. "I want to be dragged into it, if it means easier for you."

Shane sighed. "I think one of us obliterating their career at a time is more than enough." A pause. "I don't want to talk about it right now, my head is killing me. My dad sent me a picture of Rina. She's wearing the little onesie with the moose antlers on the hood. Did he send it to you?"

He had. Ilya had shown every member of his team. "Yes. Is too cute. Will be needing Hunters heart pills before long, stress of cuteness cannot be good for me."

"Can I show Scott?" Shane asked. "He doesn't know about her."

Ilya didn't even need to think about it. "Yes, show him. Is your baby too, yes? Show how cute. Will stop him from trying to steal you, knowing you have perfect baby waiting at home."

"She really is perfect." Shane sighed a little wistfully. "I miss her so much. I hate I was forced to come back early for no fucking reason. They could have managed three games without me. Now they are acting like they don't need me at all." A hollow laugh. "They got absolutely trashed by the Admirals."

"Yes, Hunter was very good for man so old he has oil for blood." He paused. "No, that one was not good. Will have to work harder for chirps." 

Shane laughed again. "You really should be nicer to him. He actually ran to the guest locker room when you called."

"Yes? Is what he should do. When best hockey player in the world calls you for favour you make sure you are running. His knees would crack like glowsticks from exercise." Ilya was very much aware that Scott Hunter had been exceptionally understanding despite not knowing any details other than Shane needed help. Ilya would have to send him something to say thank you. Haemorrhoid cream, or adult diapers or something equally useful for a man of his advanced years. 

"Kip is here." Shane added. "He's nice. He's making dinner."

"Oh, this is the young man he lured onto ice?"

"Ilya." 

"Shane."

"He's only 3 years older than us." 

"Lies."

"He was born in 1988."

"Was born in 1888. Is like vampire, feeding on young men to stay alive." 

"You are the worst."

"Am best. At everything, better than Hunter. Remember this when he is trying to steal life powers from you. You cannot let him. Have baby to go home to." 

Shane laughed, and Ilya could imagine for a moment that this whole shit show hadn't happened, and that Shane was happy and just calling him after a normal game. 

"I'm gonna stop hiding out in his guest rooms and be social." Shane said, with a slight sigh. 

Ilya nodded. "Eat food from Scotts child-bride. Show pictures of baby, is best topic of conversation - she is cute and perfect." 

"I love you, Ilya." 

"Ya tebya lyublyu, Shane."

Chapter End Notes

*I know its the San Jose Sharks but we're going with 'the names in the GC AU are slightly different from the teams IRL' and I like sharks, so here are some bull shark facts:
The swim in BOTH salt and fresh waters, and will often take a wee trip up the Amazon River!
They are considered to be the most aggressive of all sharks (there was a theory that this was because they had more testosterone but this has been debunked!)
They like to headbutt things before killing em!
More than likely the actual inspiration for Jaws on account of Great Whites being chill as fuck.

We will be getting more Karina in the next chapter! Karina and her daddy Shane!

Chapter 10

Chapter Notes

Shane sat in the house he'd bought with Ilya and hugged Karina to his chest. He had missed her so much it was a physical pain in his chest. How Ilya was coping, he had no idea, but just having her back in his arms was a balm to the shitstorm of his life. 

"They want you to waive your no trade clause." His mother was telling him. "I am going to tell them to fuc-"

"Mom."

"Shane, you are the best player in the league. They absolutely cannot treat you like this."

Shane didn't want to point out that they were already treating him like this. There was only so many times he could pick at a scab before it scarred, and he was pretty sure that this feeling wasn't going to fade away any time soon. "I want to go." He told her. "I don't want to play for a team that wont even look at me. I'll waive it."

"Its mid season. Anywhere you go will be a slap in the face."

Shane looked at her over the top of Karinas little dark head. She had started growing more hair. It was thick and black and soft as silk. "Mom, they've already slapped me in the face. I don't want to stay." He pressed a kiss to the top of his daughters head. It was odd, he reflected. If you had told him at the start of the year that he'd be permanently benched from the Metros and they wanted him out of the team, he'd have had a panic attack. He'd have been on the floor, gasping for air, life crumbling around his ears. 

However, he was currently sitting on his couch, in the house he and Ilya owned, cuddled up to his daughter and he was... well, he wasn't fine, but he wasn't spiralling. How could he think his life was over, when his life was sleeping in his arms? Karina snuffled a little, and he kissed her head again. She was perfect, in ever possible way. 

When Ilya had told him about Rikos pregnancy, he'd been hurt. Hurt with nowhere to put it, because they hadn't even been together when Ilya slept with her. He'd been with Rose. It was stupid and immature to feel cheated on - he'd always known that Ilya was sleeping with other people. It just... hurt. 

It hadn't gotten better when his mom met Riko. Half Japanese, half American - a girl who looked just like Shane down to his fucking freckles. She wasn't happy with that, but for Shane is eased an ache. Ilya had been sleeping with women who looked like him because he couldn't get him. It was oddly flattering and painful at the same time. 

But Karina had changed everything. The moment he saw her, he'd been lost. She was so small, so utterly dependant on them having their shit together. He'd once thought that he couldn't love anyone more than he loved Ilya, but she'd proven to be the exception. He'd move mountains for her. Everywhere he went, he saw things he wanted to show her when she was older. He seemed to be physically unable to walk past baby clothes without buying something. Every arena had some tacky baby clothes - he'd picked up tiny Oilers socks, the worlds smallest Toronto Blue Jays took, and a feeding bib that made it look like she was wearing a RCMP uniform. 

"I'll talk to them." His mom said, looking over at him. No doubt she was looking for some kind of mental break on the horizon, but Shane felt oddly at peace. He wasn't the problem here. Scott Hunter told the Admirals he was gay and they took it just fine - supported him. Ilya told the Raiders and they took it fine, in fact they'd asked if they should play with the rainbow tape in solidarity. The issue was the Metros. It was oddly comforting, that while his career was falling around his ears, he was able to see that the problem wasn't with him. 

"Cool." Shane agreed. He could let his mom deal with the Metros. He could spend his days with his little girl. He took a selfie of her sleeping on his chest and sent it to Ilya. If his boyfriend was getting bored of all the pictures Shane had been sending him, he hadn't said anything. Well he said a LOT, but all of it was about how much he loved Shane, Karina and his life. 

If his mom was worried about his lack of care over the outcome of his life's work, she didn't say anything. She did give him a slightly confused look, but then got her head in the game. 

"They want to fuck you over." His mom said, when he'd walked into the kitchen that morning. Karina was sleeping longer, which was great, and he'd washed and dressed her in a tiny Raiders tshirt and leggings and sent a picture to Ilya. The reply had made him laugh, it was just a string of red hearts and then a picture of Marlow looking like he was going to cry. 

"I figured." Shane agreed, reaching for the bottle that had been made up for Rina by his mom. 

Then she laughed. A proper laugh. One he hadn't heard for a while. "They want to fuck you over." She said, and then dissolved into more giggles. 

Shane looked at his mom, and then down at his daughter. "Baba has lost her mind, Rina. Its okay, its not genetic." 

"Shane, no." His mom said, wiping her eyes. It smudged her mascara a little. "You don't understand." She took a deep breath and slowly let it out, grounding herself. "They want to embarrass you. They want to make it look like you are bad at hockey by sending you to a team that sucks."

"I assumed that was part of the plan." He advised dryly. Karina was latching much better to the bottles, and was hungrily drinking her breakfast. Shane felt he could feel her getting heavier every day as she got chubbier and chubbier. 

She nodded. They'd talked about it at length the night before. Shane had assumed that the organisation were going to try to grind him down. They'd told the media that Shane had a lower body injury, but had leaked that his 'behaviour' was a problem in the locker room. That kind of gossip moved fast and there were several less reputable sports news sites that were suggesting he was drinking, on drugs or just an absolute diva. He was genuinely shocked they hadn't just outed him. 

"Oh, its the plan." She grinned. "But I've just heard from Brandon. They've been contacted to see if they want to take on your contract."

Shane frowned. "Brandon?"

"Brandon." She nodded, her smile so wide he could see her molars. "Brandon Wiebe." 

It took Shane a few seconds to digest what she was saying. "Wiebe... wait."

She nodded, then laughed. "The offer they want to take is insulting. Genuinely vile. Half of what you are worth. If he didn't already know what was going on with Ilya he would have thought it was a prank." She paused. "I've told him to agree - take it and run." 

Shane blinked. "Wait... really?"

She nodded. "Shane, you're coming home." 

Shane sat at the desk in the home office and grinned into the webcam. Ilyas face filled the screen, and he was cooing over Rina, who was wearing a tiny pink outfit because she'd thrown up on her Raiders top. The clothes were tiny, but he was doing more loads of laundry than he'd ever done in his life. 

"Papa loves you, Rina." He was saying. He was on his phone, and Shane could see Marlow in the background, before he wrestled the phone from Ilya, his face filling the screen. 

"Hey Shane!" Marlow grinned. "Looking good. Hello my princess! Uncle Cliff loves you - gettoffme - Uncle Cliff is going to give you so many kisses on your beautiful face. Your papa is missing you, but your uncle Cliff is keeping him safe. Her first word needs to be Mar- Ow! Get the fuck offa m-"

"Swears!"

"Thanks Cliff." Shane smiled. So far Cliff Marlow had been oddly supportive. His mom loved him. He'd added Shane into his phone and had been messaging him daily with stupid shit about what Ilya was doing. He'd told Shane that he thought Ilya was sleeping with his sister. Shane didn't have a sister, so that confused him, but Cliff was so ready to welcome Shane into his life. 

It had highlighted how different the Raiders had been to the Metros. "So I have an update." Shane said, after Ilya wrestled the phone back from Marlow. 

"Okay." Ilya said, grinning. He couldn't seem to stop smiling at Rina whenever she was on the screen. Shane understood. Every time he looked at her, his face hurt from how hard he smiled. She was too cute. 

"I've been traded." 

The expression on Ilyas face changed. Shane had seen the expression before, mostly on the ice. He liked to think of it as 'locked in' - ready to fight for the puck. "Okay."

"Its for half of what I'm worth. A real parting 'fuck you' from management." He explained. "A mid season trade, so there is no way I'll be able to gel with the team fast enough to be any kind of contender for the cup this year." He paused. "Not that they've been a contender this century." 

"You are Shane Hollander, every team you play on is contender." Ilya said, frowning. "Are second greatest hockey player in world." 

"Dude, thats Shane Hollander, you can't fucking say that to him, he's- ow!" The phone screen spun, and Shane laughed. He could make out Ilya and Cliff having a slapping match. 

"Ignore him." Ilya said, after the phone focused back on his face. His hair was sticking up wildly on one side. He looked like he was 17 again, and Shane couldn't help his dopy smile. Christ, he had loved Ilya for so long, and being able to see Ilya joyfully playing with his friend just showed how much they had to hide over the years. Ilya was glowing. "Tell me trade news."

"Well, the team fucking sucks." Shane frowned. "They picked up my contract for fucking nothing- three dollars and a loon egg - and they could hardly afford that. Apparently they were near the cap because they just signed a new centre for next season." He let out a long suffering sigh. He could see the wheels turning in Ilyas brain. Could see the start of a twinkle in his eyes. "It's in the middle of nowhere too." He complained, really hamming it up. 

Ilya was starting to smile. The same smile that he'd had on his face when Shane told him he'd hired a stylist. 

"And Ilya, Christ." He shook his head. "The mascot is the absolute wor-"

Ilya screamed. Loud enough that Rina jerked her head and fussed in his arms. "They traded you to fucking Ottawa?" He gasped. Then he started laughing. "Oh baby girl, your papa and daddy are going to have so many fucking cup rings." 

"Jesus Christ," Marlow moaned in the background. "We're all fucked." 

Chapter End Notes

Yes I'm full aware I don't know how hockey contracts work. In my head they go like this:
Shane waives his no trade thingy.
Metros, being absolute cunts, want to make him suffer. They offer the remainder of his contract to the shittiest team they can think of, because they are all dicks and I hate them. They offer to trade Shane for less money than you'd expect because they want it known that he's not worth what they paid for him.
The worst team in the league is... In OTTAWA.
The idea of the Metros fucking themselves over without even knowing it makes me tear up a little.

Chapter 11

Brandon Wiebe was a large man who looked like he was still benching his max on the daily. His salt and pepper hair was swept back and Shane liked him on sight. He was grinning like a madman when he walked up to Shane and his mom in the parking lot. Shane had been in the process of transferring a sleeping Karina from her car seat into a sling and Wiebe grinned at the sight of her. 

"And this must be little Karina. Your papa talks of nothing else." He said, smiling at her little chubby face. "Shane, welcome to the Centaurs. To say that we are excited to have you would be one helluva understatement." He laughed then. "We thought we were dreaming when Rosanov said he wanted to come here, but when the goddamn Metros called?" He ran a hand through his hair and grinned. "We told them we'd just signed a new centre for next season." He admitted, waving Shane to follow him into the building. "We might have forgotten to mention that centres name though." He looked over his shoulder. "They weren't half desperate to offload you. They knew we were just as desperate - knew we wouldn't ask a lot of questions." He almost skipped, he seemed genuinely elated. "But we've been chatting with Yuna pretty closely, and she'd sent me a message to say you might be on the market." He looked over at Shane again. "Shane fucking Hollander. A mid-season trade? We'd have snapped at that offer even if you were injured, high and drunk. And they knew it."

"They weren't aware of the outside circumstances." Yuna smiled. "A move to Ottawa was exactly what Shane would be looking for - although maybe in a few years when you could afford him." 

"Oh, we were nowhere near about to afford him - you, sorry, Shane - especially not after signing Rosanov. But a mid season trade for a couple newer players and our draft pick this year?" He grinned and pushed open a door that lead into his office. "Please, take a seat. We just need to go over a few things before I introduce you to the team. We've got three home games coming up. I expect we'll have a packed house for our boy here."

Shane nodded, and sat down. His mom liked Wiebe - liked him a lot, from what she'd told him. Thought he was a good man. Shane sat down, making sure Karina was settled and let himself relax. 

"Okay, so first things first." He said. "Everyone here knows this trade was bullshit. They don't know why - but I've got insider knowledge." He nodded at Yuna. "That insider knowledge stays insider knowledge unless you want it known."

Shane thought about it. "I'll need to talk to Ilya about it." He hedged. "I don't mind people in house knowing, but we've not made any plans to be... out. Together."

"I trust my team, and I trust this organisation. I don't trust no one else." Wiebe nodded. "So I'll leave it up to you with who you tell, and when you tell em." 

Shane nodded. 

"Secondly - your mother is a powerhouse of a woman, Hollander. We paid through the nose for Rosanov and we made promises. He's in line for captaincy, and that won't change. I know you're used to-"

Shane held up a hand. "I don't want to be captain." He admitted. It was the first time he'd said it aloud. It was something he'd thought about since the Metros benched him. "I'm looking forward to giving someone else the headaches for a while. Maybe just enjoy hockey for hockey." 

Wiebe looked pleased with this. Shane felt something in his chest ease a little. Maybe something he hadn't even been aware of holding. 

"Amazing. I'm not gonna lie, Hollander, we're not the team you left. We're not in the running for a cup, and probably wont be for a few years. Now, upper management are gonna say that we wanna sell tickets and win games, but my focus is on building a legacy. I want this team to be a fuckin team, Shane. We've got some good players - but we've got some stellar men. Men I respect. Men that won't give two shits about who you fuck, as long as you show up to barbeques and bring some beers. The wives have a book club, gas each other up in the group chat and their kids get on." 

Shane nodded. He'd thought the Metros were like that. But there had been signs, over the years. Comments he'd ignored. Perhaps an atmosphere he hadn't fostered, but one he'd allowed to grow. "I'm not the most sociable." He admitted. 

"I'm not asking you to host parties, but I expect you to show up when you're invited. Bring Karina. Let the team coo over her. I can tell you from experience that a baby does all the heavy lifting in social situations." 

"I have noticed that." 

"I bet you have." 

There was a knock on the door, and a man opened it after a polite pause. A stocky man with dark blond hair and a lanyard with more pins on it than a server at TGI Fridays. Half of them were rainbow. He lit up when he saw Shane was holding a baby. 

"Oh my god, a baby!" He said, and Wiebe laughed. 

"Thank you for proving my point, Harris. Shane, this is Harris Drover - he's our social media manager and resident player wrangler. You'll be seeing a lot of him. We're trying to drive up ticket sales by being approachable. Or something. Harris has a plan." 

"Hello." Harris smiled. He had a really big smile, and Shane had a moment of awareness that he was a very genuine man. "I do have a plan. It didn't include Shane Hollander, Ottawas golden boy." He paused. "Return of the king? Does that work if you aren't returning...?" He shrugged. "We'll work on that I think." He was carrying a clipboard, and jotted something down. 

"Hello Harris." His mom said, and Harris brightened even more. Shane hadn't thought that was possible. 

"Yuna! Oh I'm so sorry I didn't see you there. Babies have that effect on me." 

"I understand completely. What are people saying about the move?"

Shane watched as the bright bubbly man in front of him snapped into 'work mode'. "Well, so far it's absolute horror." He admitted. "Metros fans are out for blood - they don't know what Hollander could have done that deserved this."

"Ouch." Wiebe mumbled. 

"Don't take it personally, its absolutely out of left field. Some fans are speculating its drugs, some kind of scandal that the league is trying to hide." He shrugged. "There's a whole reddit thread with fans dissecting every game you've ever played for some kind of cheating thing - so far no one's found anything other than a couple of questionable instances."

Shanes head snapped up from where he was smoothing Karinas hair down. "Questionable?"

Harris grinned. "Oh, not for cheating. Its been highlighted that you score more often when playing Boston." He winked. "A few fans did the math and now your rivalry has empirical evidence - Ilya chirps you 40% more than any other Metro, and gets into less fights during those games because he's too focused on getting under your skin." Harris shrugged. "Some fans have stated it shows you hate each other IRL," He actually said the letters I.R.L out loud. "And a couple of hockey RP effers," Shane didn't want to know what that stood for, "Are saying its proof that you are in a secret marriage. There isn't really any in-between on that one." 

"I can honestly say I've never once let my personal relationship effect my game." Shane said, firmly. 

"Oh, we don't think you do." Wiebe grinned. "Although if you'd like to start, now would be a good time." 

"We're going on a 'Hometown Hero' route with you for the rest of the season." Harris said, smiling at Shane. "Pushing the fact that you were born here, Yuna has been kind enough to give us some amazing pictures of you as a kid in the stands, and wearing a Centaurs jersey when you were younger. And of course, we do have some tape of you playing here in the peewee league. We've already had a massive uptick with engagement, but a lot of that is just from the news hitting this morning. I expect it'll die down, and then we can establish a baseline. I know you aren't as... active... on socials right now, but we're hoping you share a few posts, maybe even tweet a bit. We want people to see you are happy to be here - that you aren't kicking and screaming as we force you into your uniform." 

"I can do that." Shane agreed. "Ilya said I should throw shade." He told Harris. "I'm not sure what that means though."

"Ilya needs to keep his nose out of this." Harris smiled. "He's a terror and will turn me grey before he ever sets foot on the premises." It was said fondly though. "Throwing shade is... subtweeti... its being mean to the Metros." Harris explained. Shane got the idea he was going to say something else that Shane wasn't going to understand and pivoted half way through his sentence. He appreciated that. "I'm happy for you to use twitter and post whatever you like," Harris advised. "You are probably the most media trained player in the league and I'm not worried you'll blow up the internet with an ill advised comment. Ilya absolutely will be the death of me though." 

"Cool. If there are specific things you want me to share, just let me know." Karina fused a little in her sling, and Shane adjusted her carefully. She was awake but settled, and Shane was impressed at how chill she was. As long as she was being held, she didn't seem to care too much about anything else. 

"Well, I was hoping that you might want to say something today about how happy you are to be here? Basic 'met the team and they are cool guys' tweets, that kind of thing?"

"I can do that."

"Thats all I can ask of you. You're by far the most popular man in Ottawa right now, and you'll probably be fed up of seeing your face plastered over everything for a while. It'll die down next season when Ilya joins officially, and we won't be pushing a rivalry. You are teammates. Thats the official line." He smiled. "If you decide to announce something different then you absolutely have our support." 

"Amazing," Wiebe said, standing up. "Are you ready to meet the team?"

Shane handed Karina over to his mom before walking into the locker rooms where the team were getting ready for practice. She would be picked up from the rink by his dad, and Shane would drive home after practice. He took a few moments to appreciate that his parents lived locally, before taking a breath and walking into the locker room with Wiebe and Harris. 

There was a moment of silence when the other players noticed him, a hush he didn't have time to obsess over before Boodram - a player Shane admittedly never really noticed when playing against the team - let out a loud whoop. 

"Holy shit, it was true." He boomed, a wide smile splitting his face. He had a lot of tattoos, Shane noticed. 

"Okay, listen up!" Wiebe said, cutting through the rest of the teams excited murmurings. "Hollanders trade went through last night. He'll be taking part in practice and we'll be playing him on Tuesday."

The room was buzzing. Everyone looked pleased to see him despite not knowing why he'd been traded. 

"I honestly didn't think it was real." Someone said, and Shane looked over.  Evan Dykstra, he remembered - pretty good on the ice but lacking power in his shot. 

"Its real." Wiebe grinned. "The Metros fucked up."

"Um." Shane said, looking around. 

"Go ahead." Wiebe encouraged. 

"Look, um," Shane started, and felt a cold trickle down his spine. He didn't want to start on a bad tone, but he also didn't want to lie. "So I know that a lot of people have been wondering why I got traded."

The hush was instant. Shane was never good at speeches. He clenched his fists. "I know what the rumours are. I'm not on drugs, I'm not injured. They didn't want to play with me any more." He took a breath. "Because I'm gay." 

The silence was deafening. Then:

"What the actual fuck?!" Someone yelled, and the room descended into chaos. 

Shane almost panicked, until he realised that people weren't yelling at him - they were yelling for him.

Practice was... fun. It dissolved into a skill test about half way through. The team just wanted to see what he could do. Wiebe was letting it happen. Shane wasn't a huge fan of showboating, but the team were actively enjoying it - Boodram (call me Bood, dude, please!) was setting up pucks for an accuracy challenge. Harris was filming the whole thing, a big smile on his face. He figured that if he was derailing training, Wiebe would say something. He was currently watching the team with an indulgent smile on his face. 

But the thing was... Shane was having fun. A lot of fun. The team were excited to talk to him, excited to share the ice with him. No one seemed to hesitate hugging him enthusiasticly after he nailed one skill test after another. It felt like... being a kid again. They played a group round of keep-ups with the puck on their sticks and Shane had caught the puck on the edge of his stick, balancing the black disc. He'd been tackled to the ground for that, a mess of bodies. As he was getting back on his feet, all he could think about was how much Ilya would love this team. The boisterous, affectionate men were so much like him, that Shane couldn't help but love them all right away. 

Eventually though, Wiebe called off the playtime, and set them to run a few plays. Shane was moved to centre, but was told that they planned to move him to a winger next season. They'd be running him through training as a left side winger, but he'd keep playing centre until then. 

Shane loved the feel of the ice under his feet, the sharp scrape of blade on ice, the crack of the puck on his stick. The team was... okay. He could see holes in the defence, they didn't have anyone in the role of enforcer, and they were lacking a solid front line, but it wasn't all bad. He could see where he would fit, and how well the team responded to feedback. They wanted to win, wanted to do well. During the time they were goofing around, Shane had given Chouinard and Dykstra a few pointers, nothing big, just a 'noticed you did that, why don't you try this?' which they'd both been very receptive to. 

He might not have the C on his shirt, but he still thought like one, and was given respect he hadn't earned with these men. 

Once practice was over and they were making their way back to the lockers to shower, Harris stopped Shane. "Hey! Can I grab you for a quick second?"

"Sure." Shane nodded. He was used to getting pulled into media things at training. It felt like he always had a camera shoved in his face. But Harris was no longer filming, his camera hanging around his neck. 

"I won't keep you long, I just wanted to say that I'll be posting a video of the practice once I've edited it - if you could share it on all your socials that would be ideal."

Shane blinked. "That's it?"

"Well, yeah? We don't want to overload you on your first day. Trust me, it'll be an absolute circus on match day, but I'll try to keep the press pool under control. You don't need to say anything if you don't want to - a good ol' 'no comment' or 'next question' won't kill you. And if they are being rude, you be rude right back." 

"You are very different from the Metros social media guy." Shane pointed out.

Harris beamed. "I'm taking that as a compliment. Thank you."

"It is absolutely a compliment. I think if I'd have said 'no comment' in a presser he'd have killed me." 

Harris scrunched up his nose in distaste. "Not a big fan of letting you set boundaries, I take it."

"Pretty sure he didn't know what boundaries were." 

Harris frowned. "Well, we do. If you don't want to do something, just tell me. This only works if you are comfortable." 

Shane nodded. "Thank you." 

"Shane, I think you need to be told this, and I hope I'm not over stepping." Harris took a deep breath and waited for Shanes nod. "You are a great hockey player. The best, probably. But you are a person first, and you should be treated as such." 

Shane made it through the shower, the excited atmosphere of the locker as he got dressed, and all the way to his car before the tears started. 

Chapter 12

Chapter Notes

Ilya loved playing Montreal. He loved playing them in Montreal. 

The way the crowd seemed to move as one organism, the roar in his ears, the jeers and cheers. He loved knowing that he'd play the best hockey of the year. Because Montreal had one thing no other team had. 

They had Shane Hollander.

Had being the operative word. 

The internet had been ripping the entire franchise to the ground. The company line was being picked apart. They'd leaked that Shanes 'behaviour in the locker room was at odds with the morals of the organisation' which had been laughably easy to disprove, because everyone and their mother knew that Shane Hollander apologised to inanimate objects when he bumped into them. 

The lie that he had been injured evaporated during the first game he'd played in red and black - Shane scored 4 times and skated circles around Buffalo, hats raining on the ice from a packed area. Ottawa's Golden Boy ending the 6 game losing streak to a full house. The smile on his face as he looked up into the stands, defiant and edged with a promise that people heard loud and clear without him having to say a word: "You will regret this, Montreal."

Shane had given Ilya permission to tell the Raiders why he'd been traded. Ilya hadn't expected that. Shane was absolutely paranoid about people finding out he was gay. Or at least... he had been. Moving to the Centaurs had changed something, and Ilya fucking loved it. He'd told those guys and they apparently had been fine (which boded well for Ilyas move) and it seemed to have unlocked something in Shane. He'd called Ilya from his car after the first training session and had told him "I don't think the problem was me, you know? I think... I think maybe the problem was them."

It didn't sound like much, really. But for Shane, it might have well as been a bolt of lightening straight from God. 

So Ilya had told the Raiders that the Metros had traded Shane fucking Hollander because he was gay. The resulting righteous fury had tasted like nectar. 

And now, Ilya got to face them on the ice.

A team where Shane would no longer be there to give him disapproving looks if he chirped too mean, or checked too hard.

A team where he no longer had to worry about focusing all his attention on the ice because Hollander would absolutely make the most of any slip up to steal the puck and score. 

A team that hurt Shane Hollander.

"Something you want to tell me, boys?" Desjourneys asked, in the first period break. "I'm not complaining, but I'd at least like to be in the know." 

Marlow gave a quick laugh. "Just proving a point, coach." 

"Is the point something along the lines of 'you aint shit without Hollander', hmm?"

Ilya grinned. There was still a little bit of blood on his teeth, he knew. His knuckles were already starting to swell, but for every second he'd spent in the sin bin, his team had made the Metros sweat. The crowd had been baying for blood, and Ilya was pleased to give it to them. 

There were posters in the stands- 'Bring Back 24', 'Still My Captain' - even ones that simply said 'Hollander'. Ilya had seen his favourite and even pointed it out to Hayden during warm ups. "You see that one, Pike?" He'd grinned, "Trade Pike, Keep Hollander. You think they know you are 15th worst player on team? Not worth trade, huh?"

"Fuck off, Rosanov." 

"Is so sad. You think fans will be happy knowing Hollander carried you all on his back? You will not see another cup in lifetime. Is very sad. Raiders will take it this year. Walk all the way to final without single good player to stop us." 

"Go fuck yourself. You don't know shit." 

"I know why you kick best player." Ilya grinned, all teeth and no humour. "Scott Hunter had to come rescue your boy, no?"

"How the fuck do you-"

"Oh, sad little Pike." Ilya laughed. "Raiders know why. Admirals know why. Centaurs know why."

"He wont return my fucking calls, Rosanov! I can't do shit if he won't talk to me."

"Boo hoo. You call twice." Ilya snarked, rolling his eyes. "Send only messages saying 'call me'. Very supportive best friend." 

Pikes face turned an odd shade of grey. "How the fuck-"

"I know you are bad player. I did not think you were bad friend. Is not going to be fun game for you, Hayden Pike." 

The game was brutal. To say the Raiders beat their division rivals would be a very polite way to describe the absolute bloodbath of a 7:0 win. Marlow got his first hattrick of the season, surrounded by a crowd that wanted to gut him. It was great. 

The only concession Ilya made was to not throw gloves with Pike. He knew Shane would be unhappy if he hurt Pike - despite the pain of his so called best friend acting like he was the problem. 

It became very clear that without Shane, the Metros were floundering. Fans were rabid and furious, not knowing why their golden goose was traded for next to nothing. Ilya would feel sorry for the team if they weren't such assholes. 

However, Ilya didn't linger. The team wanted to go out to celebrate, but Ilya begged off. He was within driving distance of his family - David was making chicken parm, Yuna had told him that she'd had a new card game delivered, and Shane had sent him three images of Karina in her Raiders shirt during the game, one for each period. 

"You want to go out for drinks or come eat Davids food?" Ilya asked Marlow, who was pulling on his shoes. "Yuna liked you." 

Cliff looked like he wanted to cry. "You sure, man?"

"Yes? Is why am asking, idiot." Ilya grinned. "Is important for Rina to see uncle Marly, no?" 

The bearhug nearly knocked him over. "Fuck, yeah, okay." 

"Also new card game. This is warning, if you let Yuna win because you want her to be your manager, I will break your kneecap." 

"Gotcha, hoss." Marlow said, eyes a little misty. 

"Hurry up then. Will not be waiting for your slow ass." Ilya smirked, grabbing his gear. 

The Metros stadium had underground parking for players, and Ilya lead Marlow towards his car, letting the larger man chat about the latest drama with his cousin and her husband. Marlow had a million cousins and each of them deserved their own reality TV show. Ilya had met a couple of them at American Thanksgivings he'd been invited to, and he absolutely loved hearing about them. 

But Marlow cut off mid story at the sight of Hayden Pike leaning against his car. 

"Get off paintwork." Ilya said. "If you scratch I will have to kill you." 

"How do you know I called twice?"

"Oh, is magic power I have to sense assholes." Ilya smirked. "Move. Or I make Marly move you." In his pocket, his phone started to ring. Amazing. Ilya did love Shane, but off the ice his timing wasn't the best. Glaring at Pike, who looked like he was going to try and say something, he answered the call.

"Hello."

"Hi honey." Yuna's voice was clear. "Did you ask Cliff?"

"Yes, is here with me. Looking forward to dinner and cards. Have told him rules, he will not let you win."

"Let me!?"

Pike looked like he wanted to throw a punch. Ilya wished he would. "Can you tell your hook up you'll call her back? I want to talk to you."

Cliff choaked on his own tongue, while Yuna - who could obviously hear Pike, said: "Hookup?! Who the hell is that?"

"Is Hayden Pike."

"Oh. Well tell him to go fuck himself." Yuna snapped. She had not taken the abandonment of her baby boy well at all. 

"Yuna! Is bad language! Is Rina there in hearing range? Loon for swear jar!" 

"Wait - Yuna? Hollander?"

"Shut up, Pike," Marlow growled. 

"She's sleeping on the couch with Shane."

"Worse!" Ilya said, frowning. "Brain will hear and learn like meditation. Or... stop smoking hypnotist tapes." 

"Thats not a thing." Marlow commented. "My cousin tried those to stop smoking and they didn't work. She spent like $400 on em too." 

"Really?" Yuna asked, obviously hearing all sides of the conversation. 

"Yeah man, its a scam." 

"Marly has 40 cousins, all have drama. He will tell you about top ten family moments over dinner. My favourite is cheating on husband with husbands best friends wife. That was a good one. You will like."

"Dinner?"

"Shut up Pike." Ilya complained. "You are not involved in conversation. Is between Marly and Yuna. He has replaced you as friend of son." 

"Fuck you, Rosanov." Pike snapped. "You don't know a fucking thing."

Ilya handed the phone to Cliff. "Talk to Yuna." he ordered, before turning to Pike. "Listen here, Hayden Pike, with your wife Jackie and your four children called Ruby, Jade, Amber and Arthur. Hayden Pike who said Shane Hollander was best friend but didn't stand up for him when locker room turned on him, didn't call him until news of trade. Then only to send messages that say 'call me' like one night hook-up. No drive to see him. No call to parents to make sure okay." Ilya scoffed. "Get the fuck away from my car before I knock teeth down your fucking throat." 

"Shane doesn't want you to hit him." 

"Shane won't know." Ilya pointed out. "His best friend doesn't talk to him any more. Will find it harder to talk with no teeth." 

"No, Shanes on the phone now." Cliff advised, and then frowned. "You just heard me tell him, Holzy." 

"Let me talk to him," Pike said, holding his hand out for the phone. 

Both Cliff and Ilya looked at him like he lost his mind. "Yeah, no." Cliff said.

"Absolutely not." Ilya snapped. "Not letting 15th best Metro talk near my baby. Will infect her with stupidity. Will be incurable."

"Baby?"

"Stop talking. Move. Go home to wife."

"Shane wants to talk to him."

Ilya sighed. "Shane can use own phone and call him. Because right now, Pike's drama is delaying me holding baby. Am hungry. I actually played game tonight, not just social skate like Pike. I want my baby, want dinner, want to beat Yuna at cards." 

Marly nodded. "He'll call you." He said to Pike, and then hung up. 

"Great. Now fuck off." Ilya snapped. He wasn't in the mood to deal with Hayden Pike's hurt feelings. Shane had been so hurt when Pike hadn't called after he'd come out. He'd been even more hurt when Pike hadn't reached out to him when he was benched. Then when Shane had gone to training, Pike and his other friend JJ hadn't spoken to him. There was only so many times Ilya could forgive someone for hurting Shane. 

He'd hurt Shane in the past. Knew the slump of his shoulders, the tears that refused to fall past thick lashes. To see first-hand how Shane internalised those punches, found the flaw in himself and not in others, was a painful sight. 

Ilya watched Pike move away from his car. He didn't give into the urge to punch him. Perhaps he was growing as a person. 

He absolutely was not growing as a person, because about 10 minutes after he'd walked into his house, scooped up his baby girl with kiss to the top of her head, and a much more thorough kiss for Shane, Hayden Pike knocked on his front door. 

"No." He said, looking at Hayden through the glass of the door. Hayden looked like absolute shit, which was nice, but his expression when he'd seen Shane and Ilya share a kiss was hopefully captured on the door camera so Ilya could look at it when he was having a bad day. 

"Ilya."

"Shane."

"I need to talk to him."

"You don't." Ilya pointed out. "You absolutely do not have to talk to him ever again." 

"I know that." Shane said, but shrugged. "I want to? I want to at least hear what he has to say."

"Fine." Ilya pouted, but he got a quick kiss for his troubles, which did help ease his mood a little. Kisses from Shane were always going to make things feel a little better. 

"Thank you."

"Yes, am very amazing and loving, letting 16th worst Metro into our house."

"I thought he was the 15th?" Shane said, walking to answer the door. 

"Forgot the mascot." 

Chapter End Notes

I want Pike to suffer just a little, okay?
His little jabs about 'why Rosanov' to shane bug me so freaking much.

Chapter 13

Chapter Notes

Hayden sat on the couch looking like he wanted to be anywhere else. He was probably very aware that he was in a house where almost everyone had a reason to dislike him. Shane discounted Karina, because she was too young to understand things like 'best friend abandonment' or anything like that. Although she was probably picking up on the atmosphere, because she was wriggling more than normal. Ilya was walking between the kitchen and living room with her in his arms, cooing at her gently to settle her. Shane didn't think he could love Ilya more, but seeing him holding their daughter like she was the most precious thing in the world was something else. His heart hurt with the love it contained. 

"So." Shane said, after it became clear that Hayden wasn't about to start talking on his own. "You said you wanted to talk face to face." 

Shane hadn't missed the expression on Haydens face when he'd kissed Ilya. He'd been expecting shock, maybe disbelief, but the anger wasn't a good sign. His mom had told him she was going to stay in the kitchen and help dad with dinner, and Marly was sticking close to the 'adults'. Ilya told him that Cliff was trying to get his mom to manage him - apparently she was well known for being his manager and a lot of people thought she was really good. Shane had no idea. The guys on the Metros had always acted like she was overbearing. 

"Yeah." Hayden said, and shifted uncomfortably. "I didn't know you and Rosanov were a thing." 

"Yup."

"How... how long has that been going on?"

Shane thought about it for a moment. He'd been keeping secrets for so long, and the last few weeks had shown that maybe it wasn't healthy. He knew Ilya wouldn't mind him telling Hayden. "Around 2008." He shrugged. It felt nice to say. 

"What!?"

"Has known me longer than he knows you, Pike." Ilya said from the doorway. 

"But..."

"But?" Shane asked. He was starting to feel a little bad about how he was treating Hayden. He was his oldest friend - Ilya wasn't his friend, he was everything - and Shane had been very cold since he arrived. 

"He's a dick!"

Maybe Shane wasn't being cold enough. "Really? I hadn't noticed."

The sound of Ilya snorting a laugh made him smile a little. Sure, Ilya was a dick. Shane loved that, though. Loved he teased and chirped and pushed buttons. 

"But... you... what about Lily? Or Rose?"

"Boston Lily?" Shane asked. 

From somewhere in the kitchen, obviously listening into the conversation, Marley laughed. "Boston Lily? fuck me - yeah I know, I'll venmo you - Boston Lily and Montreal Jane." Then he laughed again. "You aint slick, Rozy." 

It took a couple of seconds for that to register with Hayden. "Oh. Lily is... right." He coughed. "I just don't know why you didn't tell me."

"Well I was pretty fucking worried you'd act like a dick." Shane said pointedly. "No one knew. I saw how people reacted to Scott Hunter. I heard all the jokes, Hayden. You think it was safe for me?"

Hayden looked like Shane had slapped him. "I know I haven't... I wasn't supportive." He said, after a moment. "I just... I thought I knew you. I thought I knew everything about you. I know I've not been... a good friend. " He ran a hand over his face. "I'm really fucking sorry, Shane. I didn't know, and I didn't react well. You're my best friend, Shane. I want to be... supportive? I just don't know how." 

Shane was about to reply, when Karina started to cry. "Tagging in daddy!" Ilya said, walking through and handing Karina over to him. "Kitchen too hot, making her grumpy." 

Pikes face did a very confusing quick flip through more emotions than Shane had ever seen him make. "Daddy?" He whispered. He sounded heartbroken. 

"Yes, Pike. Internet has been saying Shane is Daddy for years." Ilya smirked

"Gross," Shane muttered, before kissing Karina on her head. She was a little warm, so he appreciated Ilya bringing her through. "Hey baby, shhh." 

"You have a kid." 

"Yup." 

"With Rosanov?"

"Yup."

"Fuck." 

Hayden Pike was struggling to get through his apology with Shane, so Ilya left them to it. Everyone in the kitchen was doing a very bad job of pretending they weren't trying to hear everything that was being said though, so Ilya didn't feel too bad about listening in too. 

He was a little impressed. Shane hadn't caved in immediately. He'd known Shane for a long time and the man wasn't the best at holding a grudge. The shit he'd let Ilya away with over the years was testament to that. He didn't doubt that Shane would absolutely forgive his friend. It would take Yuna a little longer though, from her expression. 

"He's having to process a lot all at once," David reminded her, as she took a very judgemental sip of her wine. 

"Hmm." She said, eyebrow lifting slightly. 

Ilya had been the receiving end of that look once before and he was pleased it was no longer aimed at him. "How long do you think it will take for him to forgive?"

"Depends on if he brings the kids up," Yuna shrugged. "Shane is Arthurs Godfather and takes that pretty seriously." 

"How many kids does Pike have?" Marly asked, munching on a leaf from the salad bowl he was apparently 'helping' to prepare. 

"Too many." Ilya advised. Although... "Is 4 too many?"

"Yes." Yuna said, frowning like she could read his mind. "Try getting Rina out of diapers before you start adding more, please." 

He nodded. "Smart. Am still with Raiders so would be more difficult right now." 

Yuna glared. "Ilya, I will not survive another baby popping up any time soon." 

"Good point. Am very fond of your heart, would not want it to explode with love for another perfect baby." He leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. "New son, new granddaughter. Has been very busy year." He looked over. "Marly, stop eating bird food before Shane. He will be sad if you eat all his favourite leaves first. Go set table." 

Marlow laughed and started taking things through to the dining table. In the living room he could hear Pike talking - he secretly hoped that he wasn't digging himself in too deep. Shane did miss his friend. He'd rather set himself on fire than admit it though. There were some secrets that he felt it was necessary to keep from Shane. 

"Ilya!" Shane called out, not urgently, and without the underlaying 'come kill Hayden Pike'. 

Popping his head through the door, he could see Shane looking over to him. "Can you change her? Just because..." He waved a hand at where Pike was looking very close to tears. 

"Okay." Ilya agreed, making grabby hands for Rina. Her lovely little baby smell was tinged by something a little more... ripe. He seriously hoped it wasn't all up her back like the last time he'd changed her. He wasn't even sure how her tiny baby body could hold so much shit. He also wasn't sure why it was fucking yellow. Toxic sludge, probably. He sighed. "Okay, princess. Lets get you changed for dinner, yes?"

Cliff Marlow was having a fucking great night. Firstly, he was definitely getting the favourite treatment from Yuna Hollander - she topped up his glass with wine, complimented his helpfulness in setting up the table and managed to score the seat beside her during dinner. He kept the conversation flowing with stories from his extended family, and didn't let Hayden Pike get a foothold in the topic. Not that he seemed willing to try - he looked like he wanted to crawl into a hole and die. Ilya had been keeping Karina at least two people away from Pike through the night, which Marly understood. Not that he thought Pike would do (or say) anything, but Ilya had apparently decided that only people who deserved baby hugs got to be within arms reach. 

"I don't know how your mother managed to cope with five boys." Yuna sighed. "Shane wasn't a lot of work, but it was still hard."

"Oh, for sure, we were wild." Marley grinned. "My pops, he just wanted a little girl, ya know? Was desperate for a lil princess, and after 5 boys he just threw in the towel. Once all us boys moved out, mam found out she was pregnant. 19 years between my lil bro and Shannon. She's 4 now - absolute terror, won't wear anything except those Disney princess dresses." 

"Are you the oldest?"

"Me? Nah, I'm number 4. My oldest brother, Patrick works with my pops at the Firehouse, and Luke and Chuck are lawyers, like mam. They started their own firm when they graduated. Mostly its contract law, but it's a real family business." 

"Are you all based in Boston?" David asked. 

"Yup - My parents met at a Raiders game. When I got drafted they were fuc- sorry Roz - they were really happy. Proper Raiders family. When Rozy got assigned as my rook, they practically forced him into the fold. You never met a motherfuc- sorry Roz - a guy less willing to join in on the Marlow family drama at first. Guy was practically allergic to showing up to dinner." 

"Is not my fault." Rozy grinned. "This man, he says 'you come to dinner, meet family.' Am very shy Russian boy, only 18. Am thinking I will get killed." He waved off Davids scoff at the shy Russian boy comment as though he was a king. "In Russia meeting family is how you join bratva."

"Bullshit." Hollander muttered. 

"Loon."

"Fine." 

"Does your mother manage your legal representation?" Yuna asked. "It would be nice to have that be in house." 

"Mom..."

"What?" She asked, smiling at Marly. "I'm just asking. You've got a family connection to an established firm, you could really expand into sports contracts with your contacts - a lot of players have absolutely shoddy representation." 

"Maybe next time you are in Boston you can meet my mam? I get the feeling you'd get along." 

Hayden Pike wanted to punch Cliff Marlow in the jaw. The oversized enforcer was being stupidly polite, making jokes with Shanes parents and acting like he'd known then his whole life. Shane was letting him lead the conversation, and kept smiling over at him and Rosanov - fucking Rosanov - like he was having a great time. And Rosanov was holding Shanes fucking baby. Shane had a fucking baby that Hayden hadn't know about. Hayden who was supposed to be his best friend. 

The baby was obviously Shanes. She had the same dark hair and eyes, already had dark freckles. She was obviously... Hayden wasn't sure what the right term was. Japanese-Canadian? Mixed race? Shane never really talked about his race other than the times it was brought up in interviews and mostly he seemed uncomfortable about it. So Hayden hadn't talked about it either. But Karina - or Rina - was so very obviously Shanes kid. Jackie had always thought Shane would be a great dad, and Hayden didn't doubt it either, but he'd expect to at least... know when it happened. That Shane hadn't felt like he could talk to Hayden about it made him feel ill. 

Seeing Rosanov holding Shanes baby made Hayden want to grab her out of his arms. Just tell him to fuck off. Leave Shanes house, leave his parents, leave his kid. Take Cliff fucking Marlow and get out. 

But the Hollanders were obviously very comfortable with Rosanov there. David called him 'son'. Yuna ruffled his fucking hair when he say down and even cut up his fucking chicken when he was unable to do so because he was holding Shanes baby. 

Shane had told Hayden that it had been a long term thing with Rosanov - his entire fucking career - but seeing his parents work around the oversized Russian was like a slap to the face. Boston Lily. The idea of her had been a balm to Hayden and Jackie over the years. Shane wasn't lonely - he had Boston Lily. Shane wasn't isolating himself from the team - he just wanted to spend time with Lily. He was happy when he saw her, came back lighter and calm and... the idea that shit-talking, professional grade asshole Ilya Rosanov was... Lily? It just didn't make sense. 

Shane was a good person. Rosanov was an asshole. Sure, eating dinner and chatting with Shanes parents he didn't seem like it, but Hayden knew him. Knew that he was famously a dick. Famously slept with anyone with a fucking pulse. He was obviously cheating on Shane. Shane deserved better. 

But Hayden couldn't say anything - because he was having dinner with Shanes parents, and Yuna intimidated him. He got the feeling he'd only been allowed to stay for dinner because he hadn't said anything much during Shanes absolute nuke of a revelation. He'd honestly thought that Shane being gay was the biggest thing that the other man had been hiding. Turned out he'd been hiding almost a decades long relationship and a fucking baby. 

Hayden blinked. Shane and Rosanov had been together longer than him and Jackie. He couldn't imagine hiding her. Fuck. He really did suck as a friend, if Shane had to hide his Jackie. 

"How'd training go today?" Rosanov asked Shane, mouth full of chicken. He was gross. Hayden hated him. 

"Good. Wiebe has me working with Dillon on wing to set me up for next season." He shrugged. "So far I'm enjoying it more than I expected. The team keep setting up dumb challenges to 'make it fun'. Today Bood made towers of solo cups on the ice for us to 'dodge'." Shane laughed. Hayden hadn't heard Shane laugh about training in forever. "Honestly he spent more time making the towers than we spent dodging them. Then it turned into a competition to see who could build the highest tower." 

"Who won?"

"Chouinard's wife Selena." Shane shrugged. "She was dropping off Holly for her sleepover at the Wiebe's. I don't know what she does for a living but I wouldn't be shocked if it was an engineer." Shane grinned at Karina, who was making faces. "I like that everyone seems to get on - like even the kids are friends. It's nice. Makes me feel more confident long term." 

"Why are you playing wing?" Hayden asked. Shane might have been traded to a dogshit team but he was still Shane Hollander - he was a star centre. It made absolutely no sense to put the best centre in the league on wing. Surely the Centaurs understood that? 

Everyone looked at him like they'd forgotten he was actually there. The might have. He wasn't exactly adding much to the dynamic. 

"Its just set up for next season." Shane said, although he looked shifty, like there was something he was hiding. It was odd. If you'd asked Hayden 3 months ago, he'd tell you Shane couldn't lie for shit - he looked like a kid caught with his hand in the cookie jar every time. But then 3 months ago he'd been hiding a decade long relationship and had a fucking baby on the way. 

"But-"

"Are looking for team secrets, Pike?" Rosanov asked, looking smug. "Can no longer rely on Shane carrying team on back, so need to tell coaches plan of other team?"

"Fuck off Ro-"

"Is loon for jar." Rosanov grinned. He pointed to a jar on the counter. It was already pretty full. "No swears in front of Rina. First word will not be swear." 

"Are you serious?"

"Unfortunately." Shane said. "He's being very persistent about it. Probably more than Jackie." 

"Yes. Rina is not picking up terrible hockey language. She is angel, will only speak very clean English and Russian. Maybe swears in French." 

David and Yuna laughed. "Oh, only three languages?" David teased. "Aiming low, I see, son." 

Rosanov grinned. "Is only baby right now. Spanish is for when toddling." He cooed at Shanes baby like it was actually up to him what fucking education his kid got. Hayden bristled. "Will be handy when she becomes first Russian Prime Minister of Canada."

"She's not Russian though, is she." Hayden said. "She's Canadian." 

"Is half Russian."

"But she's not." 

"Hayden." Shane said, looking confused. "She is. She's half Russian." 

"Just because he's her 'dad' doesn't mean she's Russian though." Hayden said, looking at Shane. "She's your baby. She's Canadian." 

"Oh, are embarrassing yourself, Pike." Rosanov grinned, looking like a shark. "Is time for introductions, no? This is Karina Svetlana Rosanov. Is my baby. Shane has no... no, is wrong. Shane is her daddy. I am her papa. You are overstaying welcome." 

"But..."

"Hayden." Shanes voice cut through Haydens thoughts like a hot knife. He sounded tired. Like Hayden was making his life harder. The one thing he had never wanted to do. 

"Shane..." He said, but wasn't even sure how to finish his sentence. Fuck. He wished Jackie was there. She'd know what to say to fix this. Fix his relationship with Shane. He loved him, really fucking loved him like a brother, and he just kept fucking up - and he had no idea how to fix it. 

"Its been a long day." Yuna said, stepping in when it was clear that no one was actually going to talk. Rosanov was still grinning, but there was a hard edge to it, like he was just waiting for an excuse to throw a punch. "Maybe we leave it there. Pike's had a lot to take in." He was Pike now, then, to the Hollanders. He was Pike and Rosanov was Ilya. What a fucking mind trip. 

"Yeah, sorry." He apologised. "Sorry, I just... its a lot." 

Shane nodded. He looked... disappointed. Fucking Cliff Marlow hadn't disappointed Shane. His best fucking friend had though. Haden felt sick. "Maybe we try this another time." He suggested. "Once you've had time to... I don't know. Adjust." 

Hayden nodded. "Maybe next time, I could bring Jackie? And the kids? They'd fucki- they'd love to meet her." 

"Yeah." Shane nodded. "Maybe." 

Well fuck.

Chapter End Notes

Lets make Hayden Pike squirm just a little.
I personally think Jackie is like, 90% of his personality.
Also, for some reason when I think of Jackie I ALWAYS think of her as like a young Tracee Ellis Ross? I have no idea WHY - she's not like that in the book or in the show, but I just assumed she was black! Every time I see her in gifs I'm like... who is that?

Anyway, I also realised that I have a kitten called Pike
Lets just all remind each other that MY Pike is named after Pike Trickfoot, the best paladin gnome in D&D.

Chapter 14

Chapter Notes

The Ottawa Centaurs hadn't played to a packed stadium in years. 

That changed when they signed Shane Hollander. The hometown boy invigorated the die-hard fans and brought new ones in droves.

His shirts - literally anything with 'Hollander' or '24' sold out instantly. 

Every single home game was a sea of posters and fans chanting his name the moment his skates hit the ice. 

He expected the team to resent it. 

Instead, they acted like hype men, encouraging cheers and talking about him like he was Hockey Jesus. 

"Don't worry about it," Wiebe laughed, when Shane brought it up to him. "We both know we're not making the playoffs. Next season they'll be doing the same thing with Rosanov. You think they love you now? Wait till we start getting some hardware." His grin was infectious. "My wife is threatening to travel to every game. Not that I'd mind, but my parents aren't as keen on babysitting the girls as yours are." He nodded up at the stands, where his dad was sitting in the family section with Rina. It was nice that he was able to bring her to games at home. Shane felt he played better when she was there, wearing her tiny ear defenders and customised jersey - an 81 Hollander: one of a kind. Next season she'd be in a 24 Rosanov. Shane couldn't wait. 

Fans didn't recognise his dad - his mom would be another matter. An older white man in Ottawa didn't attract a lot of attention. A good quarter of the crowd looked like him. There were very few women who looked like his mom. It meant he was able to come to games with Rina. Every time he scored, Shane would have to fight the urge to look up at where they were seated. He knew Ilya would never be able to manage it. The man was 90% impulse and 10% control when it came to his daughter. Oddly, the 10% was manifesting in weird ways. He was absolutely devout in his 'no swearing' rule, and Shane had contributed to the jar more than anyone else in the house. He'd ended up having to go to the bank to get loonies, much to his moms delight. Ilya was also very strict about her ear defenders whenever she was anywhere slightly crowded. Farmers market? Ear defenders. Park? Ear defenders. Shane was waiting for him to insist on them when they were at home watching the TV. 

The team had met her. Shane felt oddly... chill... about the whole thing. He didn't want to lie any more. Coming out hadn't ruined his life, it had simply changed it - and it was a change for the better. He was on a team where he didn't have to hide, the guys were way more progressive than Shane could have thought possible, and lying felt bad with how welcoming and open they had been. 

Shane had simply brought her with a 'my partner and I's daughter, Karina, and that was it. It probably helped a lot that she did look a LOT like him. If you didn't know Ilya very well, it would seem like she was more like Shane - but he could see the moles, her mouth, the way she blinked when she was tired: That was all Ilya. 

Hayden had been texting more often, keeping the conversation light. He'd apologised about making assumptions, for not being supportive of Shane coming out. A lot of the texts sounded like Jackie had told him what to write - or more realistically - had taken his phone and written it herself. It was nice though, to be chatting to him again. Shane had missed the man he'd played with for 98% of his professional career, his roomie on the road, and the person he'd assumed would be his best man one day. 

Jackie had also reached out, advising Shane that she was going to visit with the kids so they could meet Shanes baby - they were making cards and had gifts. Shane felt a little weird about it. He wanted the Pikes in his life, but he didn't want to be in a position where he had to constantly defend his partner. 

His dad told him to be forgiving. 

His mom told him to tell Pike to fuck off. 

Ilya told him to do what felt right. 

So that's why he was sitting in the living room, watching as Ruby and Jade made kissy faces to Karina, who was watching them with fascination. Her focusing had gotten much better, and she was even starting to hold her head up a little. Shane felt like ever time he blinked she got bigger. 

Arthur had zero interest in Rina, and was focused with a laser like intensity on the building blocks Jackie had brought as a gift for Karina. "I know most of what you get will be for her right now, so I wanted to get something that would outlast a few different stages. Amber likes to chew them, and even the twins still play with them sometimes - really basic, I know, but trust me - toy blocks are the best."

"You didn't have to get her anything." Shane insisted. 

"It was the absolute least I could do, Shane. Don't forget everything you've done for our kids. If you think for one minute I won't be paying you back for all the babysitting, late night diaper runs, love and care you've shown to us, you've been hit on the head one too many times." She paused. "I... I'm sorry you felt like you couldn't tell us. I understand why - I just wish I'd been more... I wish I'd been more observant. Or like, shutting down stupid comments at parties - I never even thought about it, and that's on me." 

Shane bit back the urge to deny that she had done anything wrong, but he understood that she probably needed to say something to clear her conscience. It was also... nice to hear. That someone wished they'd done more. So he nodded, and looked at the girls. They were playing peekaboo, and giggling every time Rina did as much as blink. Apparently she was way more interesting than their own baby sister. 

"So, you and Rosanov, huh?" She said, after a moment. Her tone was light and a little teasing - and Shane rolled his eyes. 

"I was waiting to see how long you could hold out."

"Shane, it is actually the most shocking thing you've ever done - and you have a secret baby. He's..." She shook her head. "I mean, if you are gonna go, go big. You literally said 'I'm the hottest guy in the MLH, let me just make sure I lock down the second hottest."

"I'm going to tell Hayden you think Rosanov is hot."

"He knows." She smirked. "Shane, every single WAG was waiting for someone to lock you down - you're polite, hot, rich. No one expects Rosanov to settle down until way after he retires." She fanned herself a little. "He does those shirtless after game interviews, like... damn. You should 100% do a shirtless interview."

It wasn't the first time she'd suggested that, so Shane didn't take her comment too seriously. "Hmm, sure. I'm sure the MLH would be happy with me breaking the dress code." 

"Pft." She scoffed. "Dress code doesn't count for post-game interviews. Do it! Break the internet a little. And this time, you can do it knowing that your super hot boyfriend baby daddy will 100% be watching!" 

Shane did an after game interview without his shirt on. 

Why he'd let Jackie convince him that it was a good idea was beyond him, but he had to admit that it was a little funny when his mom text him to say he'd 'broken the internet'. He'd been way more relaxed after a tough loss than he'd expected - he'd played well, shown that he was still at the top of his game, and the rest of the team hadn't acted like it was his fault. In fact, Wiebe was more than happy with his performance and had clasped him on the shoulder with a 'good game'. 

The Ottawa Centaurs were used to losing, and Harris had sat him down after an interview he'd given and looked at him like he was a sad puppy. 

"Shane, you don't have to act like every loss is a personal failing. When the press ask if the team are taking a loss well, you can say "yeah, we're going out for drinks after." You don't have to pick apart your performance. That's not what we want as an organisation. We want... we want our fans to see the real you. I know you are funny, I know you are sarcastic. Trust me, no one is going to yell at you if you let loose a little." 

So when he'd been asked if he was happy with his performance in the game... Shane had grinned. "I mean, yeah. Were you?"

The interviewer had stuttered a quick: Oh sure! Before someone else asked "How are you finding the team dynamic - are you missing that C?"

Shane didn't think too hard about it. "Honestly, not as much as I thought I would. I kinda expected it to feel weird, like a demotion?" Everyone nodded. "But actually, I've been having a great time. The locker room is amazing - the guys have been just as welcoming as the fans, and we've been hanging out a lot. It's great - I get to play a game I love, and Bood gets all the responsibility." 

"What do you think of the rumours that you were traded due to 'personality difficulties?" 

Shane smirked. "Is that what they are calling it? Ah - I don't really mind." He shrugged. "All I can say is, moving to the Centaurs has been amazing. I'm in my hometown, I'm playing some great hockey, and I can't wait to start winning some cups with these guys." 

A few people laughed. "The Centaurs haven't won a cup in the history of the organisation - do you really think that a cup is in the future?"

Shane nodded and gave a cheeky grin. "Why don't you ask me that next season?"

Chapter End Notes

Although I am a Rosanov apologist, I think it's time we all got sweaty shirtless Shane in the post game interviews!
Let our man be hot!

Now I know this is a little OOC, however, I do actually believe that a baby, a trade, and being comfortably out to his team would change Shane a lot. While I think he would still be very neurotic about his training and food, I think that so many big life changes in a short period of time would either make or break you.
Give me Shane 'its not that deep' Hollander please!

Chapter 15

Chapter Notes

Chapter End Notes

Honestly just a vibe

Chapter 16

Ilyas entire body was screaming in pain. His knee was killing him, his hip was completely purple and green from a couple of nasty hits that had him spending hours in the physio office. His head hurt and his arms felt like they were about to fall off.

But none of that mattered as he lifted the Stanley Cup over his head for the second time in his career. 

They weren't on their own ice, but he was willing to overlook that to avoid another game in a hellish run. Lifting the cup over his head, he grinned wildly. The first time he'd dedicated to his mama - the woman who'd loved him first. Now though, he dedicated it to the cornerstone of his new family. "For you, Karina!" he yelled into the roaring crowd. He kissed the cup again. "For you!" He knew Shane would be watching and know that was for him. 

Marley was crying when he passed the cup over to him, smoothly despite the shaking in his legs. They both knew this would likely be the last time they played together - the last time they'd be in the same jerseys. The rest of the team still didn't know where he would be going, but he'd told each of them that he was planning on leaving to be closer to his daughter. They'd understood, and he felt confident in the knowledge that he'd left them in good standing for the future. He'd been working with the newer rookies all season to get them ice time and confidence, and he could see the pride in their faces as he hugged and congratulated each of them in turn. 

Marley must have finished his victory lap because he barrelled right into him with a cry of "I fucking love you, man!" that nearly knocked both of them on their asses. 

"Are you trying to kill me?" Ilya grinned, before kissing him on the cheek with a loud smack. Two of the younger Marlow family were on the ice, congratulating their uncle and Ilya took the time to give them big hugs. Cliff had absolutely mortified his nephew - a rainbow pin wearing teenager who was attending university in New York - by telling Ilya that he only watched hockey because he had a crush on the captain. "I am very sorry, young Marlow - I am already in relationship. But New York is good place for dating, no?"

They'd be back on a flight in short order, and Ilya planned on sleeping as soon as his ass hit the seat - he knew that Boston would be a week long party that he could honestly do without. However, Shane was already in Boston with his parents and Karina. They wouldn't be partying together, but knowing that he'd get to celebrate with his little family was enough for him. 

He couldn't wait. 

Boston was... wild. 

He'd been on floats, TV shows, internet podcasts and more public appearances than he remembered from the last time. He was happy to do it, but the highlight of every day was getting back to his hotel suite. 

The Hollanders had gone all out. The suite was in an expensive hotel, and they'd spared no expense. Shane had actually been working on some PR for the Centaurs, and had been seen 'meeting' with Ilya at an event - it made sense that he'd have been made aware of the upcoming trade, and Ilya just enjoyed being able to chat with Shane in public. They'd been spotted at one of the many industry events having a very cordial conversation - Shane had even given a rare hug to Marley - and speculation was flying. Was Shane about to jump ship to the Raiders? 

They had family dinners with Karina tucked between them both, and Ilya couldn't believe how much she'd grown. It hadn't seemed like that long ago she'd arrived into his life, and now she was smiling up at him as he talked to Shane. He was in the middle of telling some stupid story that had made Yuna laugh so hard she snorted wine out of her nose, and Karina laughed. 

A proper laugh. 

Well, a giggle. 

The stunned silence around the table made her stop, but she quickly started again when they all immediately scrambled to make her laugh again. Shanes eyes were a little wet, but Ilya couldn't help actually cry. He'd spent the past few months worried that he was missing so much, but he'd been there for her first laugh. 

"You good?" Shane gently asked as his parents were lifting Rina up and cheering. His hand was warm and steadying on the back of Ilyas neck. 

Sniffing, Ilya nodded. "I just... am happy. Not to have missed it." 

Shane nodded, and gave him a kiss. No heat, no promise. Just a gentle acknowledgement of love shared. 

The news of Ilyas trade to the Ottawa Centaurs caused absolute chaos. 

The management had been overjoyed to announce that they'd already negotiated for Ilya before they had any idea that Shane Hollander would be on the market. They'd sat in the press room and smiled. 

"Well, we'd never have been able to to afford both of them, of course. The cap wouldn't allow it. We'd already finalised the offer with Ilya and agreed he'd be captain when Shane was offered - we knew we wouldn't be able to give him the same role as he had in Montreal. We expected our lowball offer to be shot down. It wasn't."

"Did you tell the Metros that you had offered on Rosanov?"

"We weren't required to." 

"Professional courtesy?"

"We showed them the same courtesy they did to Hollander." Wiebe smiled like a shark. "They never asked us for any additional information and it would be stupid of us to offer anything that would jeopardise a trade we would benefit so highly from." 

"Are you concerned with personality clashes between two of the most well known players in the league?"

"Not at all."

"Not even with the rivalry?"

"I think we're all aware that's been PR spin for the better part of a decade." The owner* Mrs Lalonde said with a shrug. "We aren't looking to further that... manufactured story here at the Centaurs." 

"Are you saying that Rosanov and Hollander are happy with this outcome?" Someone asked, voice clearly telegraphing that they didn't believe a word. 

"I am." She smiled. "I think they are both very happy to put this," She scoffed the word: "Rivalry... to bed once and for all."

Cameras clicked and more questions were asked, and Shane and Ilya watched from the training room with the rest of the team. It was decided that they'd sit out the first presser - Harris and management thought it would be a good idea to get ahead of the story with management first. 

Ilya had been introduced to the team for the first time that morning and it had all been filmed and photographed to hell and back, but now all the attention was on management, and they'd been left to get on with it. 

"Wow." Bood said, after another volley of questions were asked about the trades - if the league was happy with the cap being circumnavigated by Hollanders lowball trade from the Metros, if they really expected the team to gel with two massively different play styles, and a hundred other questions. "I thought Hollanders trade news got them excited. They're practically foaming at the mouth."

"I am best player in League." Ilya grinned. 

"Second best." Shane muttered, but he was focused on his phone, probably reading all the comments on twitter. People had been looking between them all day, as though they expected a fist fight to break out. Currently Shane was sitting on the bench at his cubby, all attention on his phone. But he was in his socks, and looked exceptionally relaxed. For Shane, at least. 

"Best." Ilya shrugged. "So - is first time we are meeting!" He clapped his hands together. "You have questions, yes? Better questions than stupid press I hope."

A couple of players exchanged looks. Ilya wondered who was going to ask fi-

"So you guys don't hate each other?" Dykstra asked, looking very invested. Ilya grinned as Shane snorted derisively. 

"Nope!" He smiled. "Am not hating Shane Hollander."

"Why here?" Bood asked, "I mean, they said they'd already got you before the Metros fucked up - so you wanted to come here?"

"Is good question - thank you Mr Boodram." Ilya said with a flourish. "Yes, was always plan for me to come here."

"But why? I mean... I fucking love this team, I love it. But we're not..."

Ilya waved a hand. "Was not for team, sorry." He didn't look sorry, he knew. "Plan was to move closer to family here. Partners parents are hear, is closer to them." People nodded, although no one seemed to be putting two and two together just yet. "Partner worked in Montreal, and we have new baby, so good idea to live close for help. But now they live here too so is better than original plan!" 

"You have a kid?" someone asked at the same time as someone else asked "You have a partner?"

"Yes, yes. I have long term person. And new baby, she is best. Amazing." 

"Aww that's cute." Bood grinned. "Holzy has a baby too."

"Really?" Ilya grinned, before a roll of tape was thrown at his head from where Shane was sitting. 

"Don't be an asshole." 

"Am answering questions from team! Am not," He grabbed the tape and threw it back, hitting Shanes shin. "Talking to you."

Shane just grunted, and went back to his phone. Ilya made a mental note to take it off him after an hour or so - just to stop him spiralling. The team were watching them closely. Chouinard looked at Ilya, and then blinked. 

"So... your partner worked in Montreal?"

"Yes."

"And now works... here?"

"Yes." Ilya was grinning very widely. He probably looked deranged. He didn't care at all. Shane had already given him the go ahead weeks ago. They were done hiding. 

"Here, here?"

"Yes."

"What are you getting at, Chou?"

"Well, I mean. I know one person who worked in Montreal, then moved here, and has a new baby with a long term partner." He said, after a moment. "And that baby has a fucking Russian sounding name." 

"Really?" Someone asked, sounding excited. "You met Rosanovs partner?" 

Ilya laughed, and promised he'd be able to put names to faces once he'd gotten over the high of officially working with Shane, of not hiding, of life actually working out better than he'd ever have hoped for. 

"You are fucking kidding me." Chouinard said, before letting out a laugh that had him doubled over. "How the fuck did you keep that a secret?"

"I don't get it." Bood said, looking at Ilya.

"Dude, his," Chouinard pointed a finger at Shane who was looking up from his phone with a goofy smile on his face, "fucking baby is called Karina Svetlana." 

"That's so weird!" 

"Oh my god, you are all so stupid." Chouinard said, burying his face in his hands.

There was a moment of pure silence, and then the entire room exploded.

Chapter 17

Chapter Notes

The Cottage was a type of magic Ilya felt in his bones. 

Nothing of the outside world could worm its way into the serenity its walls contained. Not without permission, of course. 

Unlike last summer when it was an isolated haven, this summer it was a warm welcome of family and friends. Karina was growing before his eyes, and he'd enjoyed hosting a barbeque - although he'd let Bood playfully shove him out of the way of the grill when Ilya had told him that he normally let Shane do the cooking - but 'how hard could it be?'

Right now, he was sitting on the floor with Rina, trying to find new ways of getting her to giggle. Shane was laying on the couch - it seemed like since he'd decided to not stress about one thing, he'd started forgetting to stress about others. He had a beer when the team was over, and even ate desert a couple of times a week. 

Ilya still struggled with his darker moods, but he'd decided to listen to his... Dad? It felt odd to put David into a role that had caused him so much pain, but it was difficult to think of him as anything other than a 'dad'. Sometimes Ilya felt like he'd stepped into a TV show, one of the Disney ones where everyone wore too many layers and parents were too kind and supportive to be real. 

"Can I have a chat, kiddo?" David had asked one day, Shane was out with Rina and his mom, looking at offices for the Irena Foundation they had planned to start. Karinas arrival had stalled that for a bit, but Shane was starting to get more focused on it. 

"Okay," Ilya grinned, looking up from the puzzle they were working on. Shane hated puzzles - Ilya had no idea why. They were quiet and boring just like most of the things Shane liked. That day he'd woken up feeling odd in his skin, something he'd been pushing back for too long. Even cuddles with Shane and Rina hadn't helped the shadows seeping into the parts of him he didn't like to look at. 

So when Shane was getting ready to leave, he'd jumped into the car and said he'd spend the day with David. Keep him company now he was retired. It was flimsy, but Shane just smiled and packed an extra granola bar into the baby bag because he knew Ilya would eat it on the drive over. It was nice to know that someone knew him well enough to just... pack a snack for him. 

 "How are you feeling?"

"Good." Ilya smiled. Things were good, he had no reason to complain. 

David made a little frowny face that Shane had inherited. "Hmm." He said, and then took a breath. "Okay. I'm going to be real blunt here, bud. I don't think you're fine." 

Ilya frowned. "Am good." He reiterated. "Honestly."

"I know you're a tough guy and I think its probably really likely that growing up you weren't really encouraged to talk about... feelings." David made a little unhappy face. "We've - I mean, Yuna and I - we've been talking to a therapist. A couples therapist." 

Ilya swallowed. David and Yuna seemed to be a solid couple, Shanes ever-steady parents. "Is... something wrong?"

"Hm? Oh, no." David said, probably seeing the expression on Ilyas face. "We're good. As a couple, we're good. We thought it might be a good idea to talk to someone about little things that were worrying us. Its sometimes a lot easier to talk about things with someone who wont take sides, an outsider opinion. Things we... just wanted reassurance about." He paused. "Yuna was very hurt that Shane felt like he couldn't tell us he was gay. She felt like she'd failed as a parent, and I didn't... well I just didn't know what to do."  He paused and took a drink of his soda. He always had one when Ilya did. "My parents... they certainly never talked to me about things like that." 

Ilya nodded. He wasn't sure why David was telling him this. It didn't sound like they were getting divorced. But isn't that why people went to couples therapy?

"It's been really helpful." David continued when Ilya didn't interrupt. "Helped us refocus on things that we don't have control over and see what we could do better as parents, and partners. It's one of the reasons that Yuna has been more of a 'mom' than a 'manager' recently. Our therapist pointed out that Shane might not be able to separate the two. Emotionally, I mean." He paused. "And it also helped me too. Lisa - that's her name - she pointed out that I mostly let Yuna do the heavy lifting with Shane a lot. Expecting her to know what to do or say without any input. I didn't notice. Now I do." He looked at Ilya and smiled. "I wish we'd gone sooner. It might have helped us be better parents. Made things easier for Shane." 

Ilya nodded. He was honestly a little lost but David looked pleased. 

"I think it would be a good idea for you. Therapy." 

Ilya laughed. "No, is okay." 

But David wasn't ready to be pushed off. "Our parents can make life easier or harder for us." He said. "I know my parents didn't help me be a better man - or a better father. And I think that if you thought about it for a little while, you might see how your childhood didn't set you up for being the kind of father you want to be? Maybe."

It had been on Ilyas mind for two weeks. David never mentioned it again, never pushed or hinted at it. But it had settled in Ilyas mind like a ticking clock, always there, just on the edge of every thought. Tick tick tick. 

He knew he didn't want to be like his own father. Didn't want to bring Rina up into a life where she never felt enough, felt like she wasn't... good. Didn't want his darkness to infect her. Sitting on the floor, Shane laying on the couch, Rina giggling and rolling on her fat little belly, he made a decision. 

"Am going to find therapist." He said, not looking at Shane. 

"Hmm?" Shane smiled. "For your knee? Don't you like Terry?"

"No, for head. Um, therapist for my brain." 

Shane sat up, looking concerned. "Is something wrong?"

"No. I don't know. Maybe." Ilya said after a moment. "I feel... bad. Sometimes. Less, now. But sometimes is... I feel like is pressing into me." He wasn't looking at Shane, but Rina. Talking to her was easier. She had no idea what he was saying so she couldn't judge him. "I think is good idea to talk to someone."

"You can talk to me." 

Ilya shook his head, and smiled when Rina copied him a little, with a big smile. "No. I love you, but you are not... expert. You help every day, but some things are not for you. I need professional to talk to about father, and maybe mama. Maybe you, too? Not bad things. Just..." 

"Just venting?" Shane supplied. 

"Yes. To talk and not feel like am complaining. Like I will say I am tired with up at nights! If I say to you, you will not wake me when Rina cries. Is not what I want. Just to... say the thing. Is hard to say." 

"It might be a good idea to find a Russian speaking therapist then?" Shane suggested, reaching for his phone. "It might be easier to talk when you don't have to try and translate it all as well." 

Ilya watched as Shane started tapping on his phone, probably already on the hunt for exactly that. He felt his heart thump painfully in his chest at the severity of the love he had. He had known that Shane wouldn't... laugh at him... for talking about finding a therapist. But the lack of questioning, the lack of judgement... it made his heart swell. He loved this man so fucking much.

"Shane?"

"Hmm?" 

"Lets get married." 

Chapter End Notes

I'm going to be wrapping this up in the next two chapters I think. Unless one of these boys does something I'm not expecting (I have no control over their actions, I just move my fingers over the keys)

Um, thank you all so much for the comments. I've been having some IRL shitty life things going on and I have been fed.
I forgot how nice it feels to get comments where people are like... nice. What a change from the shadows in my own head!

So, thank you and love you.

Chapter 18

Ilya wasn't sure what he was expecting when he asked Shane to marry him. Planning, maybe?

It wasn't for Shane to call his parents and tell them to get an appointment at the municipality office as soon as possible. 

"We'll do this now and then when there is more time we can have an actual wedding." Shane explained, "I just... I want to be married to you now. Now."

Ilya didn't see the point in waiting - and three days later he was married. Yuna and David were there, Marlow and Svetlana arrived the morning of, and Hayden and Jackie Pike showed up a little late, but that was explained by the very excited children they ushered in, all dressed in frothy dresses. Arthur had a little bowtie. 

"I'm sorry we're late," Hayden apologised, looking stressed. "Amber got carsick and-" But Shane had just hugged him. 

"I'm glad you came." 

"Your my best friend, Shane. I know I've not been very good at it... but I fucking love you, man."

Karina was lost in a sea of frills and organza, and the Pike girls were absolutely overjoyed at being the 'main event' at a real wedding. 

They didn't hide, didn't use any back door. Other couples congratulated them, they were photographed and Shane didn't panic. 

The backlash happened. They knew it would. 

But the cottage walls were solid and safe and Ilya was married to the man he loved. Shane officially adopted Rina, and Ilya would always remember that summer as one of the best of his life. 

The first game of the season was an absolute circus. 

Canadians were generally not as loudly enthusiastic as American fans, but Ilya hadn't ever heard Boston be as loud as the Ottawa that night. The sea of Black and Red was interspersed with rainbows and posters, and the general atmosphere was electric. 

The locker room was a riot. Training for the past few weeks had been some of the best times Ilya had spent on the ice - playing on the same line as Shane had been magic. There was no other way to describe what they were like on the ice. All Stars had simply been a preview to what they were actually capable of, and Ilya knew in his bones that this would be a season for the history books in more way than one. 

But tonight was important. 

First game, at home. 

Against Montreal. 

Ilya actually felt sorry for the other team. This would be embarrassing for them, obviously. But more than that, he could only imagine how it felt to skate into an area where everyone knew you were a piece of shit, and wouldn't care if you left on a stretcher. 

Shanes Instagram picture of their wedding day was still trending. Both of them, tanned and glowing, holding Karina - parents and friends around them. "It's been almost 10 years, but I wouldn't trade a single one of them. I never thought I'd be able to openly love like this. Thank you to those friends and family who have stood by us through everything. I can't wait to share the ice with the love of my life - same team, same line. Lets go #Centaurs #ProudOttawaboy!" 

Ilyas - a picture of them from the draft, and then a picture of Shane sleeping, Karina on his bare chest. "Summer before draft I met this boring Canadian. He shook my hand like a dork and introduced himself. How could I not fall in love? He pushed me to be better on and off the ice. Rosanov vs Hollander will live on in family game night!"

When they hit the ice, the stadium exploded in cheers. It was Ilyas first game with the team, although Harris had been peppering socials with reels of practices. The most popular one was of him and Shane facing off, both focused and determined to win, clips of hard checks and chirps. "Do you think we have to remind them they play for the same team now? They are actually trying to kill each other on the ice."

Ilya skated around - hands in the air - soaking up the adoration, while Shane shook his head and got on with his stretches. They both knew that the hockey world would be watching. Some probably hate watching. Some maybe just to see what all the fuss was about. But some maybe would be seeing themselves in a sport that had always been hostile to them. Happy and thriving. 

"Hello Pike." Ilya grinned, skating by the centre line. "Are you looking forward to game?"

Pikes face was a grimace of pure suffering. "What do you think?" He muttered. "Half of the team want to kill you both, the other half want to kill themselves so they don't have to play."

Ilya laughed. In the crowd, Pikes wife Jackie and his kids were in the family section. He waved and blew kisses to the girls, who screamed and waved back. Ruby was wearing a 24 Hollander Metros shirt, which she happily showed off to him. He gave her a thumbs up. "Good luck, Pike." He grinned, skating backwards. "You are going to need it." 

"Were you nice?" Shane asked, when he drifted in his husbands direction. 

"I was very polite and wished good luck." Ilya nodded. "Like good boy." 

Shanes face scrunched up, not believing him at all. Ilya smiled, all teeth. 

"Shane, you wound! I wished him good luck. I threw kisses to girls! Very friendly. Didn't threaten to brake face, or call him 15th worst player." Ilya flexed his jaw. "He said might be dirty game, half team want to kill us." 

"That's not new." Shane shrugged. "They were like that last season too. It makes them sloppy. They come out too angry and make stupid mistakes." His husband shook his head. "Its embarrassing." 

"I think they will be very embarrassed tonight." Ilya smiled. "They can play best hockey of their lives and will not go home with a win." 

"Okay." Shane said, getting to his feet. "Lets do this."

The game was... messy. The Metros were playing like they had a chip on their shoulders, and they weren't afraid to show it. However, the Centuars had been training for that specifically. Shane had been their captain for years. He knew the playstyle, knew how they'd come out swinging - and they'd adjusted to match. It was clear that having Shane on wing was throwing them off - used to him being centre. It was a miscalculation on their end that pushing Shane might cause Ilya to lose focus. 

It was almost laughable. Ilya knew his husband. Knew what hits he could take. A lot of people thought that because Shane didn't fight, didn't get drawn into drama, stayed calm and was polite to everyone, that he wasn't able to take a hit. It never ceased to amaze Ilya that people sometimes thought Shane was small. He'd played hockey since he was a kid, had more fake teeth than Ilya and was fanatically religious about his training. He could punch like a fucking train if he wanted, and could brush off a check with a shrug of his shoulders, hardly slowing him down. 

So the Metros tried to fuck with Shane, and Ilya let them. Shane simply smiled, shouldered through another too rough check and sliced down the ice faster than anyone could keep up. His grin was infectious - and Ilya realised that he was having fun. Shane was actively being targeted, and he was grinning like an idiot about it. It was fucking with the Metros, probably more than Ilyas never-ending chirping. 

"The fuck are you smiling for, Hollander?" Berkes growled, after Shane zipped past him with a wide grin. Shane had locked eyes with the other player, and no look passed to Ilya, who only had to let the puck kiss his stick before he scored with a deliberately nasty goal. 

"Just enjoying the skate, Berk." Shane smiled as the crowd exploded into cheers, "Nice little warm-up for the season, yeah?"

"Fuck off." 

"I did." Shane grinned. "Have you won a game since then?" Then he was off again, chasing the puck with laser focus. 

Ilya skated past and whistled. "Ouch. That must have hurt, no?" 

"Fuck you, Rosanov." 

"Not my type, Berky." He winked. "Settle bet, I say I will get first hatty tonight, Shane says it will be him. How many goals you bleed before you decide to focus?"

The look he got would warm his toes on cold nights. He left Berkes stewing as he hopped the boards for a line change. They were swapping out more often to stay fresh, and Shane was always his best with short bursts of power. He could sweat out as many minutes of overtime as needed, but he thrived on a fast paced game. 

"You good?" Ilya asked, as Shane fell onto the bench, grabbing his water. 

"Yup." Shane smiled. "Nice goal." 

"Nice pass." 

They bumped helmets. Shane had been very pointed that Ilya wasn't allowed to kiss him during games. Ilya gave that rule till mid-season, but he wasn't pushing it. Right now all he wanted to do was bask in the joy of getting to play hockey with his husband. He twisted around to the family section and blew a kiss to Karina, who was being held by David, because Yuna was too busy yelling at the refs for missing a high stick. She was wearing a little custom jersey that had a little foal centaur on it, and 24 Rosanova on the back. 

"Hey Ilya?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm really fucking happy." 

"Me too, Shane." He smiled, fully aware he probably looked like a lovesick puppy. The team had made fun of them several times for just 'making eyes' at each other, which made zero sense. But all the teasing was with a fondness and good natured love that even Shane just rolled his eyes and laughed. It would never stop being amazing to Ilya just how tightly Shane had been wound - it wasn't until he actually started to relax that the extent of his tight control was visible. He'd even started going to therapy himself, after Ilya had started his anti-depressants. The side effects weren't bad - he'd been worried he'd be a zombie, but aside from night sweats and the occasional heartburn, he'd been fine. Shane was in the process of going through an Autism diagnosis and had been... oddly chill... about it. 

"I just figured, if I can put a label on it, then I can work with that." He'd admitted one night, when he'd been talking about therapy. "I think its a good idea to know."

"And you do love the label making thingy." Ilya had pointed out, which got him cold feet on his side, trying to push him out of the bed. "Stop, stop!"

"You are such an asshole," Shane had huffed, but he sounded adorably warm - for someone who had the coldest feet known to mankind. 

"Yeah, but you love me."

"Yeah, I do." 

Chapter 19

Chapter Notes

Shane was grinning widely as the sweat dripped from his hair. Ilya wanted to bite him. 

They'd pulled both of them for a post game hallway interview - because of course they wanted both of them - and Shane looked delicious. Ilya normally thought Shane looked good enough to eat, but damn. 

Ilya had no good excuse for being shirtless - but he knew that Harris wouldn't mind, because Harris was pro-thirst-trapping-the-internet. Shane had a sleeveless compression shirt that showed off his arms and shoulders and Ilya was having problems concentrating. 

"Rosanov," It was hard to make out who when the lights were shining directly in your eyes. "First game as a Centaur and Captain - you must be happy with the result of tonight's game?"

Ilya nodded. Around his neck was his mothers cross, and a simple gold band he hadn't had time to put back on his finger. His skin was still tanned from the summer, and he knew he looked good. "Yes, was good result. Nice warm up for season."

"And Shane - this was the second game you've played against your former team - and the second hattrick against them - how do you feel the Metros are doing without you at the helm?"

Ilya watched as Shane nodded. Harris had given Shane a very clear 'say whatever the fuck you want' speech, because the Metros were trying to spin his time as captain as a control hungry diva. The sports general homophobia that was rampant in the sport was doing a lot of heavy lifting for them with the word 'diva'. Ilya had NOT been given the same chat from Harris. His chat was more like 'try not to get yourself arrested or cancelled'. 

"I'm sure they're doing just fine." Shane shrugged. "This was just a bad game for them, we all have bad games." 

"They just have so many more bad games since Shane left." Ilya pointed out, helpfully. "New playstyle of not scoring any goals is maybe not what fans want, maybe? Maybe fans thinking shouldn't have traded Hollander for stupid reasons." 

"Speaking of that trade - Shane, do you have anything to say about the rumours around, uh, you and Rosanov?"

"Ah - the rumours that I let him win because we were secretly dating?" Shane clarified. 

Someone snorted in the back. It might have been Harris. "Yes." 

"Yes, every game I played with Boston Shane let me win." Ilya smirked. "Even the games where Boston lost. Was win. Don't look at scoreboard. Don't look at stats. Every game was win for Boston." 

"Fuck you, the Metros beat you more times than we lost." Shane argued. "You can't say that-"

"Ah, but was win because you are too in love with me to score."

"I scored more than you did!"

"No, you are remembering wrong." 

"Boys!" Harris cut in. "I think what Ilya is trying to say, in a very incorrect and wrong way, is that its been picked apart over and over again - the numbers don't lie, no one let anyone else win because of a private and personal relationship. I think the WNLH can quite definitively prove that."

"If you are knowing Hollander family you will know is big insult to let someone win, even if everyone knows you can put pick-up-2 on a pick-up-2."

"The rules-"

"No one reads the rule! Is Uno!"

"Thats absolute bu-"

"Boys!" Harris cut in again, sounding a little desperate, "Any more questions? Please?"

"Um, The Boston Raiders were very supportive of your relationship coming out - has the lack of acknowledgement from the Metros affected your relationship with them?"

"Not at all." Shane smiled. "My relationship with the Metros remains the same." 

"Raiders aren't bigoted homophobic assholes." Ilya added. "Just regular assholes." He blew a kiss at the camera. "Poor Marlow will never live up to me as Captain."

"Wasn't he at your wedding?" Someone asked. 

"You can't call them as-"

"I call them this when I am captain, I will continue to call them this, is Boston thing. Is sign of love and respect. You would not understand because boring Canadian. Boston people know."

"You married this boring Canadian!" 

"Yes, and I love you very much but you are not understanding that I will always think Marlow is asshole because he is best friend." 

"Any questions about the actual game of hockey that has just happened?" Harris asked. 

Someone cleared their throat. "Um, how has the team energy been, going into this season?"

"Very good." Ilya nodded. "Boys are ready. Will be a great season."

Shane nodded. "A win like this right out the gate is a great motivation as well."

"Even if it is only Metros."

"Who are a great legacy team with a dedicated fanbase."

"Less of a legacy since fumbled Shane Hollander. Is not something I would personally do." Ilya smirked. "They will say, boohoo, Shane is not good player, and we will be good without him carrying us like little children, and now they cannot win single game."

"Which is just a slump they will recover from." Shane added, before he gave a little shrug, "At some point."

Ilya wanted to bite him. Sink his teeth into his trapezius and gnaw like a dog with a bone. While his comment wasn't anything anyone could call undeserved, but for Shane it was positively bitchy. Shane knowing he was hot shit had a reactive effect on Ilyas sex drive. Shane was always so fucking humble that when he stepped out of that role it was like a tasty little treat. 

Harris stepped forward, "Okay, that'll be all for now. If you have any more questions, you can submit them to the press team and we'll do our best to get back to you within 24 hours." 

He shuffled them back towards the locker room. "That was actually very good, thank you both." 

"Sorry for arguin-"

"No, no! It was great! If that's what I can expect when we get you both out there, I'll take it." Harris smiled. Ilya got the idea that Harris was very fond of Shane, and was more willing to let him get away with whatever he said and did. Ilya, who understood and agreed with that sentiment, nodded along. 

"Okay, we'll let you get back to getting cleaned up. I'll be posting your goal highlights in a couple of hours and would love it if you could repost?"

"Of course." Shane agreed, quickly. He'd never been great at being active online - not like Ilya who had to have his phone physically removed from his hands to stop him from arguing with people on Twitter - but he always took the time to post when Harris asked. 

"I will also post," Ilya added, nudging Harris playfully. "Will only bash Metros a little. Promise."

"Do you believe him?" Harris asked Shane, with a smile.

Shane laughed. "Not even a little. 

Yuna and David followed them home - after handing Karina over so Ilya could get her settled into her car seat. Ilya wanted to spend as much time as possible with her, because now that the season had started, they'd be on the road a lot. Time was limited with her, and Ilya and Shane were acutely aware of that. They'd talked about taking her with them - at least until she started some kind of daycare, but had decided against it in the end. It just didn't seem fair to remove the stability of a routine.

David, who was now completely retired, was thriving in his role of grandfather. He spent a lot of time with Rina at the park and had a little group of similarly employed grandparents, they had little meet-ups where they played chess at the park while various ages of kids could be kept an eye on.

Yuna loved being a grandma, but found the day-to-day a little tedious. She'd been looking into setting herself up as a manager for other hockey players after conversations with Marlow. She'd already taken over for Ilya and while he wasn't making quite as much in sponsorships as Shane, probably not helped by his late nights arguing online, the change in representation hadn't gone unnoticed. 

leaving Karina behind was going to suck. But being able to spend every day with Shane? Playing hockey, sharing hotel rooms... being out and open and so fucking happy - it just seemed like a dream. 

Lies. 

Ilya Rosanov had been sold on lies. 

"Shane, this is not ethical." He whined, laying on one of the two fucking twin beds in their hotel room. Because Shane had made the decision that they would be no different from their teammates when it came to rooms. And, apparently, sex. 

"You'll live."

"No. I will die. Shane." Ilya said, throwing his arm over his eyes. "I will actually die."

"Die quieter, please." 

Ilya sat up, and glared at his cruel, heartless husband. "You don't love me anymore."

"I love you just fine."

"No. Lies. You are liar. My heart is broken. Husband wants divorce." 

Shane, who was unpacking his case, because of course he unpacked his case even though they were only going to be there for two nights, rolled his eyes. "Ilya, no one else has sex on the road, and they live just fine. You'll survive."

"At what cost? To my heart, my poor, dying heart." He paused. "My dick will fall off, Shane. It will walk out of room and leave me." 

"Firstly, gross. Secondly, no." 

"I agreed to stupid no kisses on ice. I agreed to no sex in arena. I did not agree to this." Ilya glared. "We are not in playoffs. Sex is fine!" 

Shane paused his re-folding to give a deep sigh. "We aren't going to act any different from the rest of the team. I don't want the team to think I'm... I don't know... getting special treatment."

Ilya groaned. "Shane, we are married. They already know you are my favourite, already know I treat you best." He got to his feet and carefully took the socks out of Shanes hands. "Shane." He murmured. "Shane, listen. Is not special treatment for me to love you. Is not something team will hold against you. No one will care what happens in our hotel room, is our room."

"I know." Shane mumbled. "I just... what if they hear?"

"Will be very educational."

"They'll think its gross." 

Ilya pulled back a little. "Shane, is not gross."

"I know that. Its just... you know."

"You think they'll think is gross because... is gay sex?"

"No." Shane said, then, "Yeah. I guess." He wouldn't make eye contact, but Ilya wasn't overly worried about that. Shane never made eye contact when he was stressed. "I know you think its stupid-"

"Is not stupid." Ilya soothed. "Is not." He added when Shane pulled back a little more. "Teammates never hear you have sex before, because you are Shane Hollander and are very nice to team. I am Ilya Rosanov and half of Boston has heard me fucking, I am not shy." 

"Thank you for this reminder." Shane snarked. 

"Listen. Team know we have sex, but is different to have it shoved in faces, yes?"

"Yes. Exactly." Shane nodded.

"Okay." Ilya nodded. "So we don't have sex. And we don't kiss. And we don't touch. And that will be better, yes? They will be happy because we are not throwing gross gayness in faces all the time." He continued. "And we will not act like we are married, or that we love each other. We will not bring Rina to home games, because is baby of two men." 

"No, wait." 

"Shane, where is line?" He carefully leaned into Shane space, placing his forehead on Shanes wide shoulder. "What is too gay for team?"

Shane slumped a little, wrapping his strong arms around Ilya. His heart was hurting for his husband, who - despite being more relaxed recently - was still the same overthinker. Still the same man who had been traded because of who he loved. Who was still expecting another shoe to fall, eventually. 

"I just..."

"I know, Shane." Ilya soothed. "Is okay. We don't need to do anything, okay? But I am not sleeping on stupid bed without you." 

"Okay."

"Okay."

Shane was eating breakfast - the hotel actually had options that worked with his diet plan - when Bood and Chou sat down beside him. 

"Hey man." Bood said, "Can we talk?"

"Sure thing." Shane smiled. They'd been on the road for 6 days and he was looking forward to getting back to Ottawa. He missed Rina, and although it was his idea, he really missed the physical intimacy with this husband. He'd expected Ilya to try and push back, but he'd just... did what Shane asked. They slept together, something Ilya would not be swayed on, and Shane was secretly pleased. It was the only time they had where he didn't feel like everyone was scrutinizing them. 

"How are you?" Bood asked, looking a little uncomfortable. 

"Good. Why?"

"I'm not gonna push anything... but like... dude - are you and Ilya fighting?"

"What?" Shane asked, shocked. "No! Why?"

Chou looked over to where Ilya was sitting chatting to Dykstra, who was leaning close and telling him something that seemed important. "Look, we get that it might be weird being around each other all the time, but its important to remember the little things, you know?"

"I have no idea what you are talking about." Shane insisted. He sometimes missed things, but Ilya had been, fine? They were fine, right?

Bood looked like he wanted to pat Shane on the head. "You don't have to tell us anything, Shane, but... we just want to let you know you can talk to us?"

"Honestly," Shane said. "I don't know what you are talking about." 

"Shane, you guys don't sit together on the bus, or plane. You hardly talk unless its about the game. We asked Rozy if he wanted to get a double room and he said the twin was fine." 

"Oh." Shane finally understood. "Okay, I get it." He smiled. "Everything is fine," He explained. "We just didn't want to make anyone uncomfortable, you know?" 

Chou and Bood looked at one another. "Huh?"

"You know, didn't want people to feel weird." 

"Shane." Bood said, after a moment. "You know we don't care about PDA, right?" He looked over at Ilya. "Like... If Cassie was on the team I'd be absolutely unsufferable."

Shane shrugged. "Well, yeah. But its... different."

"No..." Chou shook his head. "Its not?"

"Like I said, you don't have to tell us if something is wrong, but like... its a little uncomfortable when you guys are avoiding each other." Bood said. "Just know that we're here if you need to talk. And we won't tell Rozy, okay?"

Dykstra looked at him like someone had killed his dog. "Hey, Cap." He said. "Hows things going?"

"Is good?" Ilya frowned. He'd had an intervention before. Marlow had normally been the one who'd pulled the short straw because they shared a room. 

"Uh, good. Thats good." Dykstra nodded. "So um... you and Shane?"

"Yes?"

"Everything good there?"

"Yes?"

"Right. Because the guys and I are like, worried. You know? About you guys?"

Ilya was sure there was a question in there, but he wasn't sure if he was supposed to answer. "Okay." He looked over to where Shane was sitting, and he was flanked with Bood and Chou. He looked absolutely mortified. "Is Shane getting same 'talk'?"

"Uh, yeah." Dykstra nodded. "We thought a two pronged attack was best. Cause its really weird. How you guys don't... like. Touch." He grimaced. "You hardly talk unless its on the ice. It's kinda freaking everyone out." 

Ilya blinked. Huh. 

"Shan- We were worried people might not like...uh, the flirting." He said after a while. 

Dykstra nodded, then shook his head. "I mean, we're not saying like, you have to be couple-y if you don't wanna, but... like." He paused. "We thought you might be having like, issues." 

Ilya wanted to laugh.

He didn't.

But he wanted to.

"So they talked to you too?" Shane asked, when they went back to their rooms after breakfast. The bus would be taking them to the rink in an hour, and Shane always liked to decompress after eating. He was blushing furiously, and had been since his little 'team meeting' over his eggs. 

"Yup." Ilya grinned, popping the 'p' obnoxiously. "Very worried about our sex life."

Shane looked mortified. "I've never been so embarrassed in my life." He muttered. "This isn't what I wanted." 

Ilya hugged him. He loved Shane a lot, and sometimes he just needed... to be squeezed. His therapist had recommended weighted blankets and it confused Ilya how much it soothed Shane when he was stressed, but Shane fucking hated it. Hated it worked. So Ilya had taken just... flopping on top of him. Shane never complained when Ilya was close, and the weight of his body helped. So he wrapped his arms around his husband and squeezed him hard. 

Shane went limp in his arms. "I don't know how to be normal about this." He admitted. "I want to be... okay with touching you. But we've spent so long hiding."

"It habit to not look." Ilya nodded. "Habits are hard to break, I know." He said, resting his chin on Shanes shoulder. "I still want cigarette sometimes."

"I hate that I'm like this." Shane admitted. "We're married. We're out. The team knows. We have a fucking kid. And I still get nervous that when I look at you people will... know?"

Ilya understood. He loved Shane, wanted to make things easier for him, but he couldn't fight the years of repression for him. Ilya had found it easier to drop that - he'd always been more comfortable with sex than Shane. People knew he fucked. He'd never been shy about that. Shane though, was terrifyingly protective of his personal life.

To strip that away was something he'd probably have to work through with his therapist. Ilya was only able to support him. "I think," Ilya murmured. "That I will flirt and tease." He advised. "Is up to you if you want to react? And if team is not good with it, can pull back?"

"Okay." Shane nodded. 

"Okay." 

Ilya held Karina close, smelling her absolutely lovely baby smell. He missed her so badly when they were on the road, but he couldn't lie - this feeling of holding her close after some time away was euphoric. 

David and Yuna had brought her to the airport - along with the other wives and kids, who were holding big signs and cheering - 8 GaMe StReaK! in crayon lettering. A few people were taking photographs, but were being a lot more mindful than Ilya would expect. Maybe they understood that the kids were out of bounds. 

"Papa missed you so much, my baby!" Ilya crooned into the top of her head, peppering her with kisses. Shane was helping sort out everyone's bags, because that was the kind of thing Shane was really good at, and Ilya would forget his head if it wasn't screwed onto his shoulders. 

She made soft little baby noises that made his heart melt into a puddle, and he wondered if they maybe should reconsider taking her on the road with them. "Hey princess," Shane said, stepping beside them. "Did you miss us? I bet you did! Daddy bought you too many things." He smiled, kissing her head. 

Ilya grinned. Shane was apparently incapable of passing an airport shop with dumb tourist shit - he'd bought something for her at every single one. She certainly would never be wearing the Buffalo team bib, or the Washington state socks. Shanes excuse was that "He wanted her to know that they were thinking about her everywhere they went." Which was enough to make Ilya weak at the knees and determined to kiss him. 

Since the little 'chat' the team had, Shane was more likely to let him. Sex was still off the table, but Ilya had managed to get some concession with 'hand and mouth stuff' so he wasn't too concerned. Especially when Shane gave him a little peck on the cheek before picking up their bags. 

Ilya smiled when he realised Shane wasn't blushing or looking around nervously to see if anyone was looking at them. He just... did it. 

Fuck, Ilya loved this man. He'd marry him again if he could. In fact, were planning for it.

Shane had a whole Pinterest thing - which Ilya didn't really understand but he dutifully curled up into Shanes side in their bed and made comments over the pictures he saved. 

"I like the green."

"Which green?"

"The soft looking one." Ilya said, and pointed to a picture of some absolutely stunning table arrangement that seemed incredibly impractical but looked nice in photos. 

"Sage." Shane nodded. "I like that too." His nose scrunched up. "I don't want pink though."

"Or red. Is tacky." Ilya added sleepily. "Like bad valentine."  

"Hmm." Shane hummed. He typed something into his notes app. "Lavender? That looks nice on this palette? With some yellow." 

"Is nice." 

"Ilya?" 

"Hmm?" 

"Is this nice for you?"

Ilya blinked. "What do you mean?"

"Just... this isn't boring?"

Ilya thought about it. "Yes. Is different from before - not parties - but is..." He snugged deeper into Shane. "Safe. I feel safe. And sleepy, but... warm. Even with your cold feet." 

Shanes smile was warm, and felt like home. 

The Stanley cup was in the building. It had been down to Ottawa and New York. 

Ilya could feel it - the burn in his throat and thighs, the focused determination of the team... Ottawa had never made it to the finals. Not once. Not in the history of the franchise. 

Shane had been staring into space, ignoring the buzz of the locker room - his fingers were twitching around his phone, which he'd had in aeroplane mode since arriving at the stadium. They'd knocked out Montreal, knocked out Boston (and only one of those teams had been anything near a challenge and it wasn't the fucking Metros, much to Ilyas delight). 

They had a chance. They had a good chance. 

 It just didn't work out. 

Hunter had been on fire. He'd lifted the cup to the roar of the home crowd and kissed Kip on centre ice for the second time. 

"We did good." Ilya told the locker room. "We did better than anyone ever thought we could do. We fucking killed it." 

He couldn't stand the silence. The tight bubble of disappointment. He'd wanted to prove... something. Prove that people had been wrong about him and Shane. That they were still champions. 

Then Bood laughed. 

"Holy shit." He said, between deep, booming laughs. "We made it to the fucking finals. I scored a fucking goal in the final of the Stanley Cup!" 

Then Dykstra laughed. It took a couple of seconds before everyone was laughing and cheering. "We fuckin did it! The finals!" 

Shane looked like he wanted to cry. Everyone else was cheering and whooping and Ilya wasn't sure how'd they'd have reacted to a win, but he was relieved that they were taking the loss well. He let them cheer and sat beside Shane. 

"You good?" He asked, nudging him with his shoulder. 

Shane nodded. His eyes were shining, and he looked like he was a few moments away from letting the tears on his waterline drop. "Yeah." He whispered. He watched as the team pile on top of Coach Wiebe, in his second year of coaching and first time in the finals. "They're happy." Shane said, sounding confused. 

"Is first time in finals." Ilya said. "First time in career. Is... achievement." 

"But... we lost." 

"Yup." 

"Yo - should we go and congratulate the Admirals?" Bood asked. "Like, is that cool? Do we buy em drinks?"

Shane blinked. Slow. "Um, I don't know?"

"You know Hunter though, right?" Dykstra asked, "Like from All-Stars?" 

"Uh, yeah, we know him." 

"Is only for outreach." Ilya added. "Like... helping community by talking to old people."

Everyone laughed. They'd lost the cup and his team was laughing and cheering and asking if they should buy Scott Hunter drinks. 

Shane got to his feet. "Fuck it." He said. "Lets go crash their party." 

Ilya was drunk. Shane was drunk. Scott Hunter was drunk. In fact, everyone was drunk. Probably everyone in New York.

Ilya had never... crashed a locker room party, certainly not when he'd just lost the fucking Stanley Cup. He was pretty sure it was the first time in history it had happened. 

But Shane had just... walked up to the Champions locker room, opened the door and shouted. Actually shouted. Shane Hollander. Shouted. "Scott Hunter, you fucking beut!" Ilya hadn't known Shane had it in him. He'd been speechless. 

And that had been it. They'd been instantly swamped by the new champions, handed bottles and folded into the celebrations. Now they were heading to another bar. Bood had one of the Admirals rookies on his shoulders - the rook was wearing a rainbow flag like a cape. Ilya wasn't sure where the rest of his team were, but he'd draped himself over Shanes shoulders and was pressing kisses into his neck. But Shane was letting him. Letting him kiss and whisper drunkenly into his ear - and he wasn't even blushing. He was talking to Kip, who was Hunters carer, and managing to walk in a relatively straight line. 

Everyone let out another random cheer, and Ilya grinned. 

"Shane. Shane."

"Yeah?"

"I fucking love you." 

"Love you too, Ilya." Shane laughed. "But I think you are drunk."

"You are too." 

"Maybe," Shane grinned. "But we just lost the cup." 

"We'll get it next year, promise." 

Shane laughed. "Okay. If you promise." 

The sound of nails scrambling on hardwood was the only notice Ilya got before Rina and her constant shadow, Anya, launched themselves onto his unprotected stomach. 

"Papa! Papa!" Rina half screamed, inches from his ear. "Happy Birthday! Wake up!" Anya's wet nose made its way into his other ear as she snuffled and whined for attention. "Papa, daddy made pancakes and bacons in a smile for you." Rina said, as he opened his eyes. She was kneeling on his chest, and the slight sunburn on her nose looked less red. They had a fight every day about sunscreen. 

"In a smile?" He grinned. 

"Yes. And he made a smoothie that's not green." She nodded. "Its got mango and nanners. I chopped them for you." She leaned forward and gave him a huge smacking kiss. "Are you awake? Are you excited for the zoo?"

Ilya had let her pick what they would do for his birthday and the zoo was her choice. "Am awake." He told her, "Or maybe this is dream? Beautiful girls waking me up? Is dream?"

"No, Papa." Rina smiled, patting his face. "Out of bed, is time. Daddy and me took Anya for walks already when you were sleeping forever." 

"Okey." 

"Okey!" She repeated back at him. "Come on Anya, we can play sewerball before zoo!"

After probably permanently crushing his internal organs with her tiny feet as she clambered off him, he rolled out of bed, and instantly stood on a dog toy. 

Shane was in the kitchen, plating up breakfast, and Ilya wrapped his arms around him from behind. "I am hearing there is not a gross green smoothie this morning." He smiled, kissing into his husbands neck. 

"Don't get used to it," Shane grinned, leaning back a little. "It's a sugar bomb first thing in the day." 

"You're a sugar bomb first thing in day." Ilya said into his ear, before biting on the lobe a little. 

Shane snorted, but didn't push him away, so Ilya remained draped around him. "Rina promised me smiling bacon." 

"Rina can't keep a secret if her life depended on it." Shane snorted, sounding so soft and fond. "Mom and Dad called - they're taking Anya on a hike while we're at the zoo, so we need to drop her off on the way." 

"Dad is trying to steal one of our children." 

"Dad is stealing both of our children," Shane reminded him. "For tonight at least. Unless you've changed your mind about what you wanted for your-" 

He was cut off by Ilya spinning him around and kissing him deeply. "Shane, if I don't get to bend you over at least three surfaces in a Rina free house tonight I will die." 

The kiss wasn't super sexy, not with Shane snorting a laugh into his mouth, but fuck it. 

Ilya had never been happier. 

Chapter End Notes

Thank you everyone!
I hope you are happy with the ending.
I've had a really bad week so I'm just...
meh.

Thank you for all the comments, every one of them has been injected into my veins.