Chapter 1: Bury It
Chapter Notes
A completely different fic to the one I have theoretically been working on! The fic is finished and just needing light edits so there will be rapid updates. See the end of the chapter for more notes Day 1 TMZ Sports @TMZ_Sports Intimate clip of NHL favourites Rozanov and Hollander sends fans into a frenzy. The clip leaked on social media appears to show Montreal Voyageurs player Shane Hollander and Ottawa Centaurs player Ilya Rozanov in a ‘private moment’, and has quickly sparked speculation among the fans. [read whole article] Dani Dives @damndani UGH fucking Brad James Bar 🏒 🌈 @saypuckit Like who tf even cares?? We have openly gay NHL players now, it’s a new gayer era, can we let the gleeful scrutiny go? Stan the man @bringback1987 I’m no homophobe but this is an ethical issue – they play for opposing teams! If I was the NHL I would be making sure to investigate for potential game fixing
Group chat: EMERGENCY Shane Hollander has added Farah Jalali to the group chat Harris Drover has added Troy Barret to the group chat Harris Drover has added Scott Hunter to the group chat Shane Hollander has added Hayden Pike to the group chat Shane Hollander has added Jackie Pike to the group chat Harris Drover has added Brandon Wiebe Coach to the group chat Shane Hollander has added JJ Boiziau to the group chat Harris Drover has added Zane Boodram to the group chat Shane Hollander has added Svetlana Vetrova to the group chat Scott: What…? Harris: Wait Shane Hollander has added Rose Landry to the group chat Shane Hollander has added Yuna Hollander to the group chat Shane Hollander has added David Hollander to the group chat Harris: Is that everyone? Harris: Right, no questions until we’re done. If you're in this group chat, you're someone who Ilya or Shane trusts in a crisis. Harris: For those who've not met me, I'm Harris, I'm the social media manager for the Centaurs. Harris: Shane, go. Shane: I need your help and I need it now. Shane: I’m sure you’ve all seen the video. Shane: I need you to bury it.
JJ Boiziau ✔ @J_J_Boiziau @HaydenPike35 Broooo I can’t believe you didn’t even see them! 😂 Hey @shanehollander24 @ilyarozanov this does not count as you having won our bet you owe me another forfeit 😈 Shane Hollander ✔ @shanehollander24 Hayd being the most unobservant man alive does not mean we didn’t do your stupid dare. Make Hayd your next victim he deserves it more. Jackie |proud WAG, proud ally 🌈 @number1jackie I told you it wouldn’t work Hayden Pike @HaydenPike35 Wait Jackie you were in on this??? Jackie |proud WAG, proud ally 🌈 @number1jackie 😂❤ Sorry baby but you were so in your own head I just couldn’t help myself
Shane Hollander ✔ @shanehollander24 Hi all. The leaked fanmail video does, in fact, show @ilyarozanov and I embracing in the background. But I don’t have any announcements to make – just an apology for a prank in poor taste, which was never meant for public view. We certainly didn’t anticipate that it would be taken out of context, and how it would be interpreted once it was! I understand that moments like this can prompt wider controversy, and I regret both the initial prank and the thoughtlessness behind it. I’m sorry for any confusion or disappointment the clip caused. Dev Lee @abcdevin Wow this is just the most bland statement ever?? Just frustrating. Mike @mike_jonesy Honestly I'm just super disappointed. Hollander's always had this rep of being responsible, taking himself seriously and the sport seriously. Turns out he's just a juvenile sports bro like the rest of the NHL. James Bar 🏒 🌈 @saypuckit I honestly don’t know if ‘wider controversy’ is code for ‘people thinking I’m gay’ or code for ‘people thinking I’m a homophobe’?? Dan 🏒 @Dan2424 Why is all the scrutiny on Hollander? @IlyaRozanov hasn’t said anything at all… Hayden Pike @HaydenPike35 Bro I know I’ve already said this but it is literally fine with me Julie Stevens @JulesNotVerne Hey @haydenpike35 like some offense but why should people care if this is fine with you?? Hayden Pike @HaydenPike35 � gosh I wonder Jackie |proud WAG, proud ally 🌈 💖💜💙 @number1jackie 😂😂😂 Shayden Defender @shayden4eva Oh my god, is Hayden Pike soft-launching his bisexuality on Twitter? In the replies to Shane Hollander’s //apology tweet// for a low-key homophobic prank on him?? What the fuck? What the fuck?
Scott Hunter ✔ @scotthunterofficial Obviously people can kiss who they want to kiss, and perhaps I should be grateful that we’ve progressed from locker room slurs to stupid pranks. But stuff like this gets misread fast, especially online. Eric Bennet ✔ @Bennett_E Yes. Obviously we’ve seen worse but it’s still childish and just not funny. Stunts like this don’t create safe environments. Maria @MariaVNY Scott Hunter is being super polite here but honestly treating a same-sex kiss as the butt of a joke is just homophobic Troy Barrett ✔ @TroyBarrett17 Honestly I kinda disagree? This was a prank between friends, all of whom reportedly found it funny. It doesn’t seem like it was ever meant to end up being seen beyond that group. And @ilyarozanov may be a prankster but he’s a great captain.
Ottawa Centaurs @OttawaCentaurs The Ottawa Centaurs are proud to be an inclusive and accepting team, and we don’t tolerate pranks that discomfort or single out people of any marginalised identity. We’re looking into this to make sure all our players are clear on our team values – and to make sure all our players know how to voice concerns if they ever have them. Rozanov rights (and wrongs 😈 ) @thisrozfan Hey what the fuck’s with them shoving Rozy under the bus? Betsy B @itsbetsybitch 👀 Ooh I bet there’s something going on… Stew K @puckmylife ☕ James Bar 🏒 🌈 @saypuckit nah, Barrett’s been tweeting support for Roz. He’s an openly gay player so you think he’d know Julie Stevens @JulesNotVerne Yeah but he played alongside fucking Kent Dallas for years. Better than Dallas is a low fucking bar amirite?
Mark | Cens forever @MarkMyWords @HarrisDrover is Troy going to have to sleep on the sofa for not taking the party line on Roz?? Harris Drover ✔ @HarrisDrover No comment on sofa occupancy! No, but seriously, there is no ‘party line’. The Centaurs are committed to making sure everyone in the team feels safe and comfortable. We’re talking to different team members to make sure that is and stays the case. That’s it. 24/7 Troy Barrett stanning @Troytoy @Troybarrett17 baby if Harris kicks you out of bed, call me Harris Drover ✔ @HarrisDrover No comment on this either
Kaytla @KaytlaTweets Say what you want, though, the kiss was fucking hot #gayprankkiss Kaytla @KaytlaTweets Omg what the fuck Rose Landry liked this tweet??
Hockey Jaw (Check out our podcast!) @Hockey_Jaw If Ilya Rozanov and Shane Hollander's didn't have you laughing with their #gayprankkiss, maybe these will be more your scene - Top 10 Hockey Locker RoomPranks Wyatt Hayes ✔ @HazeOnTheIce Haven't seen any of these in a long while but @zaneboodram’s spicy food challenges should qualify Bood ✔ @zaneboodram It's not a prank, you all are just soft
TMZ @TMZ Rose Landry and Shane Hollander – is 2016’s hottest couple reigniting their flame? Rose Landry is in Montreal for a minibreak – and it’s not for filming! TMZ have exclusive photos of Rose and her ex Shane Hollander sharing a liplock outside Hollander’s Montreal apartment. [Read whole article] Leigh Bates @L_Bates91 Omg is it really true?? Betsy B @itsbetsybitch She’s got to be bearding for him, right? Red for Rose @imnotprimrose No way queen rose has gotta have more self-respect than that
Svetlana @TheSvetlana Soooo not to be a drama llama but @shanehollander24 I will cut a bitch so stay away from my man @ilyarozanov. [Image description: photo shows Svetlana with Ilya Rozanov. Svetlana is wearing an oversized bright red Ottawa Centaurs jersey. Rozanov has an arm around her waist. Svetlana has her head leaning against his shoulder. Both are smiling] [Image description: photo of Svetlana and Ilya Rozanov. Svetlana is wearing a bikini, Ilya Rozanov is wearing swimming trunks. Ilya is holding Svetlana in his arms in a bridal carry. Both are laughing.] [Image description: Photo of a large diamond ring, resting between two glasses containing measures of clear liquid. A bottle of Russian vodka is visible in the background] Svetlana @TheSvetlana Jk, love you @shaneollanderofficial (except when you play against Boston or Ottawa). Girls and gays, though, I am not kidding, I absolutely will cut a bitch Cliff Marlow ✔ @hockeyslucky7 Holy shit you finally locked down Rozy!! Long time coming! Can you convince him to move back to Boston?? @TheSvetlana @ilyarozanov congratulations!! Cliff Marlow ✔ @hockeyslucky7 Hey @ilyarozanov I’m going to be best man, right? Bood ✔@zaneboodram @hockeyslucky7 Fight you for it? Rozanov rights (and wrongs 😈 ) @thisrozfan Omg what the fuck? Rozanov engaged? Mrs Rozanov @katybabe 😭 First I thought I lost him to Hollander, then as soon as it’s debunked I learn I’ve lost him all over again Betsy B @itsbetsybitch This has gotta be some kind of beard thing?? Joe Day 🏒 Go Bears @UrsaMajorPenalty No I’m p sure this is Rozy’s on-again off-again gf, she lives in Boston, used to come to a bunch of games Svetlana @TheSvetlana You say on again off again, I say a woman who knows how to play the long game 😎 💍 Cassie Boodram @Cassie_Bee Sveta congrats! And way to make the rest of us WAGs jealous with that ROCK omg Caitlyn D @Caitydid Omg omg congrats!! Please tell me you’re going to move to Ottawa full time I can’t wait to see you at our WAG wine nights more than twice a year! Svetlana @TheSvetlana I think you mean our WAG vodka nights! Rose Landry 🌹 ✔ @roselandry Congratulations Sveta!! I can hardly wait to celebrate with you. Svetlana @TheSvetlana Love is in the air I guess? Rose Landry 🌹 ✔ @roselandry Haha maybe!
Fabian Salah ✔ @Fabian_Sings A couple of people have asked me what I think of the #gayprankkiss - I hate to disappoint, but actually the only time I follow hockey is when my amazing partner coaches for the Irina Foundation! (@IrinaFoundation) 1/2 Fabian Salah ✔ @Fabian_Sings I'm also not so into hot takes - there's so much pressure online to react right away and feel outrage about everything. But really it seems like there might be more to the story than can be seen at first glance, and for my part I'd prefer to actually wait for more info before coming to a conclusion. Not that this is my area! 😂 2/2 Fabian Salah ✔ @Fabian_Sings For something that is actually my area, here's some BTS clips from the recording studio for my newest single which will be dropping soon! [Video link]
HELLO! Canada @HelloCanada A source close to Rose Landry has shared with us this photo of the movie star apparently getting snuggly on a double date… Rose Landry and Shane Hollander are pictured at a restaurant with fellow NHL player Ilya Rozanov and his fiancée. Betsy B @itsbetsybitch Lol aren’t they worried about their boys sneaking around on them? Kaytla @KaytlaTweets Honestly in their shoes I’d be fine with it as long as I could watch
Buzzfeed @Buzzfeed Is Hayden Pike a ‘bicon’? Here are our picks for Top 10 Tweets celebrating the Montreal Voyageurs player’s recent hints about his sexuality [Read whole article] Shayden Defender @shayden4eva Shayden evidence is mounting baby!! James Bar 🏒 🌈 @saypuckit How the fuck did you manage to get that from ‘maybe bi man with a horde of kids and a supportive wife was pranked by his straight best friend kissing another dude in front of him’ Shayden Defender @shayden4eva You want to read that back? James Bar 🏒 🌈 @saypuckit …yeah, okay.
Joe Doe @justsomeonlinerando Whoag I feel like I am in some kind of fever dream rn with #gayprankkiss and #rozanov engaged and #rose&shane2.0 Stew K @puckmylife like for serious who had this on their bingo cards?
This Hollanov Life @hollanovtruther Okay so HEAR ME OUT. What if the engagement announcement and the Rose dating are like publicity things to distract from Roz and Hollander accidentally outing themselves?? Mike @mike_jonesy Or just PR shit to distract from them apparently being juvenile fratboys like all the rest of the NHL @KaytlaTweets Alright @hollanovtruther, I’m cutting you off now. Go home, you’re drunk.
Dan 🏒 @Dan2424 Hey does anyone remember when the NHL was actually about hockey?
Rozanov rights (and wrongs 😈 ) @thisrozfan Hey @ilyarozanov has been weirdly quiet, right? Why isn’t he stirring the pot of this twitter meltdown? @HarrisDrover have you confiscated his phone or something Harris Drover ✔ @HarrisDrover No comment 😇
Canada Trending Topics: 1 - Gay prank kiss Trending with: NHL, Shane Hollander, Ilya Rozanov 2 - Rose Landry Trending with Shane Hollander 3 - Ilya Rozanov engaged Trending with Shane Hollander 4 – Fabian Salah 5 - Hayden Pike ‘bi icon’
Messages: Coach Theriault Coach Theriault: Where are you? Coach Theriault: Hollander pick up your phone. Coach Theriault: Hollander, you are so fucking benched.
Messages: Hayden Pike Hayden: Shane bud can you please tell me how you’re doing? Hayden: I get that you are probably unbelievably angry with me right now but I just want to hear how you’re holding up Shane: Hi Hayden this is Yuna, I’ve confiscated Shane’s phone to see if we can convince him to sleep. He’s not okay, obviously, but we’re here with him. Shane: Shane knows that you would never intentionally have caused him and Ilya any kind of harm. He knows what you’re doing to try to help. Hayden: Okay. Hayden: Thanks, Yuna.
Messages: Svetlana Vetrova Shane: No news yet Shane: Text to confirm that you’ve landed okay? We’ll be watching the phone.
Chapter End Notes
Cliff was not part of the group chat and him getting involved is coincidental. Fabian Salah is not part of the group chat but posted because Wyatt Hayes got his number and asked him to. Hazy is not part of the group chat but figured it out anyway.
Chapter 2: Find him
Day 1 (Redux)
Group chat: EMERGENCY Harris: Is that everyone? Harris: Right, no questions until we’re done. If you're in this group chat, you're someone who Ilya or Shane trusts in a crisis. Harris: For those who've not met me, I'm Harris, I'm the social media manager for the Centaurs. Harris: Shane, go. Shane: I need your help and I need it now. Shane: I’m sure you’ve all seen the video. Shane: I need you to bury it. Shane: The fanmail video is real. Ilya and I are together and in love. Shane: Ilya is in Russia right now for a family emergency. We haven’t heard from him since the leak. He’s not answering his phone. Svetlana: I am old friend of Ilya’s. I know his family. When I call they hang up on me. My friends in Moscow don’t know where he is either. We think he might have been arrested but we don’t know for sure. The police haven’t acknowledged it. Shane: I don’t want to lie – I don’t want to make you lie – but I am more afraid than I have ever been. Shane: I don’t care what you need to do. Make me look stupid, make me look like a jerk, I don’t care. Just help me bury this. JJ: What the FUCK Shane?? Shane: I’m sorry we didn’t tell you about us. Hate me, whatever, but I am begging you to help me save Ilya Hayden: I am so fucking sorry Harris: We literally do not have time for that. Harris: I’ve been planning since Shane pulled me in. I have some ideas but if you have any I want to hear them too. You can pull in other people but only if you trust them to keep their mouths shut – and keep any planning offline. Harris: Here’s what we’re going to do.
Day 2
Deadspin @Deadspin Looking For The Adults In The (Locker) Room: Scott Hunter's efforts to usher in a new and more accepting NHL seem doomed to failure when pitted against the sport's enduring 'prank' culture - which to anyone not enmeshed in the sports world seems adolescent at best [read whole article].
Dan 🏒 @Dan2424 Omg they just released the game roster and Hollzy isn’t playing tonight – did they bench him?? Over a prank?? Stan the man @bringback1987 Wtf when did the NHL get so woke?? Dani Dives @damndani Uhhh honestly it’s more likely that they benched him because of the gay rumours, you neanderthal
James Bar 🏒 🌈 @saypuckit @VoyageursMTL Where is Hollander tonight?
Voyageurs Montreal @VoyageursMTL We’re not commenting on specific game rosters in this forum, but rostering decisions have a lot of different factors to them, including being a team player and representing the values of the NHL and the team. We’re delighted to be giving more track time to some of our incredible new rookies, so show them some love on the ice tonight! Dan 🏒 @Dan2424 Hollander has been carrying the Voyageurs for years and you’re saying he’s ‘not a team player’??
Rozanov rights (and wrongs 😈 ) @thisrozfan 👀 First it looks like Hollander’s been benched, but now Rozy is /also/ not playing tonight? What the fuck?
Ottawa Centaurs @OttawaCentaurs We can’t comment on current rostering decisions, but we definitely hope @IlyaRozanov will be back on track soon. For tonight, our Alternate Captain Zane Boodram will be leading the team. Rozanov rights (and wrongs 😈 ) @thisrozfan This makes it sound like maybe Rozy is actually injured or something? Mark | Cens forever @MarkMyWords Or benched until he completes mandatory sensitivity training lol Chris (Go Cens!) @ChrisCross Uggghhh I don’t care if he’s an asshole I just want him back so we can score a goal once in a while
ESPN @espn NHL player uncontactable amid concerns about safety. Ilya Rozanov, a Russian citizen who plays for the Ottawa Centaurs, has missed a scheduled return flight to Canada. Friends and loved ones have been unable to locate him, and name concern that he has been detained. Moscow Police have not responded to these rumours. [Read whole article] James Bar 🏒 🌈 @saypuckit Oh fuck has Rozanov been arrested??
Ottawa Centaurs @OttawaCentaurs Rozanov’s absence from our game earlier tonight raised questions. We can now confirm Rozanov made a visit to Moscow for a family matter and has not returned as scheduled. We have no confirmation of the rumoured arrest and have contacted Moscow Police for information. We stand by our Captain, who is not only an amazing asset to our team but to the NHL as a whole, and we hope that he’ll be home soon. In the meantime, we ask our fans to be respectful and to avoid public speculation. Dani Dives @damndani What the fuck what the fuck what the fuuuuuuck This Hollanov Life @hollanovtruther Omg was he in Russia when the video leaked?? What does that mean about all the responses? Julie Stevens @JulesNotVerne Stop right now. Read the Cens statement again. No speculating. Joe Doe @justsomeonlinerando Ur right ur right but holy shit though?
Poll(ster) @pollysockit Alright, hockey fans. Let’s all FOR NO REASON WHATSOEVER go educate ourselves on the Russian anti-gay laws. Then let’s all FOR NO REASON WHATSOEVER think about Russia how might respond to controversial public figures breaking said laws. Then let’s all play a fun game called ‘keeping our fucking mouths shut on the internet.’ Bellamy @flourpower Internet sleuthing is OUT, reporting risky speculation posts is IN
Amie High ❤ | Model and actress ✔ @AmieHigh Retweeted @OttawaCentaurs Oh this is horrible. Thoughts and prayers with Rozanov and with his fiancée. I hope this is straightened out soon! Poll(ster) @pollysockit Yes I bet his fiancée @TheSvetlana must be really devastated right now! Julie Stevens @JulesNotVerne Yes and @TheSvetlana and @IlyaRozanov make such a beautiful couple too Bellamy @flourpower I was looking through Roz’s Instagram and there are really so many photos of him with Svetlana – they’re such a beautiful couple and truly an inspiration, don’t you think? [pic] [pic] [pic] #Ilya<3Svetlana Amie High ❤ | Model and actress ✔ @AmieHigh You can really see the love in Ilya’s eyes, these pics are a great find #Ilya<3Svetlana Dani Dives @damndani Yes Svetlana and Ilya are #couplegoals – so romantic, willing to stick through the ups and downs with someone until you’re both ready for more #Ilya<3Svetlana Poll(ster) @pollysockit Hey I think this clip of him is him talking about Svetlana! He talks about his childhood friend who sold him some of his sports cars, and how pleased he is to be in the same city as her! [video] #Ilya<3Svetlana Mrs Rozanov @katybabe Omg they really are just the coolest couple, RIP my dream of being Mrs Rozanov I am just not cool enough 😭 #Ilya<3Svetlana
Rose Landry 🌹 ✔ @roselandry True love is staying together for the long haul; it’s growing up together and finding you grow into each other rather than apart; it’s trust mattering more than jealousy; it’s being there for each other in a crisis. I’m truly blessed to be friends with @IlyaRozanov and @TheSvetlana. I’m appalled by the rumours about Ilya’s arrest and hope he’ll soon be safe and home so I can dance at his wedding.
NHL Public Relations @NHLPR We share the concern of the Ottawa Centaurs for the safety of Ilya Rozanov. Rozanov, a Russian citizen who is the Captain for the Centaurs, has not returned from a planned visit to Russia and his whereabouts are currently unknown. We hope that Russian officials will release a statement soon to clarify Rozanov’s rumoured arrest. James Bar 🏒 🌈 @saypuckit So no ‘we stand by him’ or ‘if he’s arrested it’s bullshit’ or ‘we are looking into legal support for him’? Weak. Dani Dives @damndani Wow this reads like they had to say something but if he has been arrested they don’t want to get dirty, so they’re trying to say as much nothing as possible
Donovan Reed | Journalist with the Toronto Star ✔ @DonReedWrites Worth noting: multiple people close to Ilya Rozanov say the video circulating is being misrepresented, and that claims about the ‘private moment’ with Shane Hollander don’t align with what they know of his long-term relationship. As always, waiting for confirmed information is essential.
Rozanov rights (and wrongs 😈 ) @thisrozfan It’s a dickish thought but I can’t help thinking that ‘in a Russian jail’ mgiht be the only thing that would stop Roz wading into a twitter storm Stew K @puckmylife When you’re right you’re right
Canada Trending Topics: 1 - Ilya Rozanov arrested Trending with Ilya Rozanov 2 – Ilya Rozanov engagement Trending with Ilya Rozanov 3 – Hockey Trending with NHL, Hockey Pranks 4 – X Squad Trending with Rose Landry 5 – Gay Prank Kiss
Messages: Farah Jalali Farah: Roger Crowell has been calling and emailing. I’ve told him you’ll answer once your family emergency is resolved. As well as the immigration lawyer I’ve interviewed an employment lawyer who I think will be helpful, I’ll send her contact details to Yuna too and then hire if Yuna has no objections. Full details in your email when you feel up to checking. Farah: I’ve also contacted Theriault and told him to back off. DO NOT WORRY ABOUT HIM. Yuna and I and Jamie (lawyer) will be able to handle whatever comes next with the Voyageurs and the NHL. Farah: I’ll be in touch if anything changes.
Messages: Svetlana Vetrova Svetlana: Landed Svetlana: I talked to Katya. We were right. She says Alexei saw the video, went ballistic, went to the hotel where Ilya was staying, she thinks called his police friends too. I’m heading to the hotel now. Svetlana: Hotel staff confirmed that it was police who took Ilya. Also they took his phone, wallet, passport. Shane: Yuna here. Shane saw your message but can’t type right now. Any info on Ilya’s condition? Svetlana: Mostly intact when he left the hotel. That’s all I can say. Svetlana: Anything incriminating on phone? Shane: Shane says nothing. It was new for the trip. Svetlana: Ok Shane: How are you for money? Svetlana: Fine. I had to pay hotel staff and Katya before she’d talk but we’re under budget. Shane: There is no budget. Call any time day or night if you need Shane to authorise more. Stay safe. Svetlana: I’m fine. Tell Shane, I know what I’m doing. I know where to look. I will find him.
Chapter 3: Get him out
Chapter Notes
This one is a little shorter but hopefully good! I've been so much enjoying people sharing with me their reactions as they try to puzzle through the twitter storm and figure out what's actually going on. Thanks so much for your comments! Day 3
ESPN @espn Moscow police have confirmed that NHL player Ilya Rozanov was arrested for administrative violations and disorderly conduct. Police stated that delay in clarifying Rozanov’s arrest status was because “time was needed to establish basic facts” before appropriate charges could be brought. [Read whole article] Mrs Rozanov @katybabe Oh my god!! It actually happened oh my god this is a nightmare. Stew K @puckmylife Oh shit and ‘disorderly conduct’ you //know// that’s someone itching to get messy Chris (Go Cens!) @ChrisCross Fuck he better be in condition to play when he gets back, the Cens actually have a playoff chance for once Dani Dives @damndani @ChrisCross what the actual fuck is wrong with you??
Ottawa Centaurs @OttawaCentaurs We are aware of reports that Ilya Rozanov has been arrested while in Russia attending to a family matter. The Club is in the process of gathering information and is in contact with the League and relevant authorities. We are focused on ensuring that Rozanov has appropriate support. As previously, we strongly request that fans respect the privacy of Rozanov and his loved ones and refrain from public speculation. Mark | Cens forever @MarkMyWords Wow this is probably the most restrained Cens statement I’ve ever seen, you just KNOW that there is a lawyer standing behind @HarrisDrover with a bat Dani Dives @damndani Yes, a bat called 'Russia has your star player in custody and if you say anything publically provocative they might'.... Fuck, I can't even finish that. Why don't you go cry in a corner because Harris Drover is too concerned to be sassy online. Or better yet get a fucking life.
Bellamy @flourpower Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. This is one hell of a day to be a queer hockey fan. Okay. Go check ESPN, then hit me up on Signal if you’re in my circle and want to chat about this some more.
Dani Dives @damndani I think we really need to show our support for @IlyaRozanov and his loved ones right now! Let’s keep using #Ilya<3Svetlana to share any VERIFIABLY TRUE anecdotes about Ilya and Svetlana’s love story!
Poll(ster) @pollysockit It is horrific that someone can be locked up because a HARMLESS PRANK is taken out of context! I really think it deserves more attention - whatever you think of the Russian anti-gay laws, Rozanov didn't 'promote' anything, this was a JOKE (just like Russia's useless fucking standards of police investigation, apparently) #gayprankkiss #hockeypranks James Bar 🏒 🌈 @saypuckit Agreed. I used to play hockey myself in school – the stupid fucking jokes are part of the culture (one of the most annoying parts tbqh). This one was a bit OTT but still just a joke and it’s really disturbing that it’s being taken so out of context #gayprankkiss #hockeypranks Stew K @puckmylife I also used to play hockey as a teenager and you are not kidding about the stupid jokes. Though if more jokes had involved hot gay kisses I might have liked them more. Poll(ster) @pollysockit @puckmylife delete that right now. I will DM you.
Brian Gilroy | Columnist with the Globe and Mail ✔ @Brian_Gilroy Is Russia’s human rights record sliding from bad to worse? Russia’s laws against “propaganda of non-traditional sexual relationships” have always been contentious on the world stage, but never more than when they’re applied out of personal animus, not evidence [read whole article]
Canada Trending Topics: 1 - Ilya Rozanov arrested Trending with Ilya Rozanov 2 - Russia politics 3 – Ilya Rozanov engagement Trending with Ilya Rozanov 3 – Gay Prank Kiss 4 - Hockey 5 – X Squad Trending with Rose Landry
Group chat: EMERGENCY Scott: I saw the news – Ilya’s been arrested? Have you heard anything? Farah: Don’t freak out – this is a good development! This means we know where he is now, and now they’ve admitted it on a world stage they won’t be able to keep cutting him off from a lawyer. Wiebe: ‘Disorderly conduct’ worried me. Do we know what that means for his safety? Farah: Bluntly, from the legal experts I’ve been talking to, nothing good. But again, the fact that the police have acknowledged the arrest is a good thing. From this point on, anything that happens to him is public record. Yuna: Svetlana is keeping us updated. She’s got a lawyer for him and they’re at the police station. Haven’t been able to see him yet, but there’s progress. Harris: The social media chaos has already taken off - we don't want to show our hand by pushing too visibly, so keep it cautious online for now. Current focus should be on international scrutiny and diplomatic pressure anyway. Hayden: How’s Shane doing? Shane: Holding together. Just about. Shane: Thanks everyone. Wiebe: Anything you need, let us know. Yuna: We will tell you what we can, when we can.
Messages: Svetlana Vetrova Svetlana: We have him. Released while they investigate further. Svetlana: He’s okay! Shane: Can I call? Svetlana: Not now Svetlana: Sorry Svetlana: No privacy. Need to get to train station. Shane: Train station? Svetlana: Fuckers kept his passport Svetlana: It’s okay. We know what to do. Shane: Tell him I love him. Svetlana: He knows. He loves you too. Svetlana: I promise you he is safe. Shaken up. Some bruises, nothing dangerous. Needs food and sleep. He doesn’t think he can write English right now. Svetlana: I will take care of him. Shane: I know you will Shane: Thank you, Sveta Svetlana: We’ll call you from the train.
Day 4
Messages: Svetlana Vetrova Svetlana: We’re here. Svetlana: Ilya has the phone with all your numbers but probably won’t be able to use it for a while. Shane: The lawyer says everything’s ready with the embassy. Shane: I love you Ilya. Svetlana: I love you too Svetlana: Okay it’s me again. I’m going to watch until he’s through. Svetlana: He’s through! Svetlana: He’s talked to the guard. They’ve taken him into a private room. Svetlana: He’s safe Svetlana: Shane, you still there? Shane: Yuna here. He’s here. He’s okay. Svetlana: Okay. I’m going to cross the border myself now. Svetlana: I will call you if I hear anything but they’ll probably give Ilya his phone back before they let me see him. Shane: Thank you. We will never be able to repay you for this. Svetlana: You owe me nothing. I love him too.
Chapter 4: Bring him home
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes Day 4 (continued)
Group chat: EMERGENCY Yuna: We’ve been cleared to say it – Ilya’s safe. Bood: Oh thank fuck Scott: What a relief, thank you for telling us Yuna: I’m sorry we couldn’t say anything sooner. We wanted to wait until he was over the border into Finland. Yuna: We don’t yet know when he’ll be back in Canada but hopefully soon. Our lawyer is confident. Yuna: Please don’t say anything online yet, and don’t (yet) walk back anything you said. Harris: I’ve been hashing out social media guidance with Ilya’s lawyer. If you need, you can say things like “It seems like a really confused situation. I’m not sure what’s going on and I don’t want to speculate” or “The Cens have asked for privacy so I’m going to stick with that for now.” Go with bland, vague, non-committal if you feel you have to say something – or just say nothing. Harris: Do NOT use words like ‘asylum’ or ‘persecution’. Not right now. Things look good but there’s no point agitating anything. Harris: Feel free to text me if you’re being pushed to say something but you don’t know what.
Ottawa Centaurs @OttawaCentaurs We’re relieved to confirm that Ilya Rozanov is no longer in Russia and is safe. We’re glad to say he has appropriate support and we’re doing what we can as a club to make sure he is back with us on the ice as soon as possible. We know that fans will want to show support, but the best way to do that right now is to respect his privacy. We at the Centaurs are going to do the same, so we’ll not be commenting further right now. Mrs Rozanov @katybabe Omg Rozy 😭 Thank god he’s out, does this mean he’s got back to Canada? Dani Dives @damndani If he were back in Canada I think they would have said that?? But it’s good that he’s somewhere safe at least.
Voyageurs Montreal @VoyageursMTL Shane Hollander will be taking a break from games to focus on his health. As this is a private matter the club will not be providing any further comment at this time. Dan 🏒 @Dan2424 Omg what? But we’re about to go into play-offs!! We need him! This Hollanov Life @hollanovtruther The timing of this though holy shit
Messages: Hayden Hayden: Theriault and the GM are such shitheads for benching you Shane: I haven’t been going to practise, I pulled out of a game, and I blew off a meeting with them Shane: Honestly what did you expect? Hayden: You SHOULD have been able to expect them to have your back. Hayden: And what the hell was that statement? Shane: I appreciate the support but it’s not like I can play right now in any case. If anyone points a camera at me I’ll probably have a break down. Hayden: This is so rough on you, bro. I am so fucking sorry this is happening and you can't even talk about it. Shane: What are the team saying? Hayden: …I hate to say it, man, but you don’t want to know. Shane: Oh. Shane: Have you talked to JJ at least? He’s not said anything to me. Hayden: A bit. He’s still confused. He’ll come around.
Messages: JJ Shane: Thank you for the tweet. Shane: I wish I’d been able to tell you myself about being gay, and about Ilya. Shane: After Ilya’s back I would really like to talk with you. JJ: It’s fucked up that you didn’t tell me. That you didn’t trust me. JJ: But we can talk after your man is back.
Day 5
ESPN @espn NHL player Ilya Rozanov now confirmed to be ‘safe’ and outside of Russia. People familiar with the situation have indicated that he is seeking protection and is expected to return to Canada. His representatives have asked that his privacy be respected as he addresses a complex personal and legal situation. Mrs Rozanov @katybabe Where is he omg? Chris (Go Cens!) @ChrisCross Bring Rozy home so the Centaurs can win! #bringRozanovhome Joe Day 🏒 Go Bears @UrsaMajorPenalty Sorry to break it to you but not even bringing Roz home is going to be enough for the Cens to win…
Day 6
Dan 🏒 @Dan2424 The Voyageurs are just an embarrassment without Hollander. Has he really been carrying that team on his back or what? #weneedyouhollander Mike @mike_jonesy He needs to pull himself together and get back on the track to support his team. He wasn’t injured, or they would have said, so it’s bound to be some kind of mental health thing 🙄 James Bar 🏒 🌈 @saypuckit Funny how people telling him they need him while simultaneously telling him he’s failing hockey and betraying his team might be just a smidge stressful.
Day 7
Chris (Go Cens!) @ChrisCross @Ottawa Centaurs Really? Another game with nothing new on Rozanov?
Chris (Go Cens!) @ChrisCross Well fuck making it to the playoffs I guess.
Day 8
This Hollanov Life @hollanovtruther [Image description: the Charlie Day conspiracy board meme. A man stands in front of a bulletin board on which there are overlapping pieces of paper pinned, all connected by red lines. He has a wild look in his eyes as he is explaining the board to someone off-screen.] Hollander: doesn’t play since the video leak; initially acts all casual about the ‘gay prank kiss’; as soon as Roz is safe he goes silent on every platform and his team announce that he’s taking a break. Also not a single word from Ilya’s fiancée for days. So…. 👀 Bellamy @flourpower Stop. Now. Safety is conditional until it’s confirmed otherwise. Dani Dives @damndani @hollanovtruther you know I love you but I absolutely WILL throw hands.
Day 9
Dave (Boyyy) @BigDave4 Holy shit, I’m in the airport in Amsterdam and I legit think I’m booked on the same plane as Ilya Rozanov? I was going to take a photo but this really hot scary lady came up and told me that if I pointed a camera at him she would break my phone and then she would break my face. Stew K @puckmylife WHAT Mrs Rozanov @katybabe Omg how did he look?? Dave (Boyyy) @BigDave4 Idk super jetlagged I guess? What is he even doing here aren’t the playoffs like next week? Julie Stevens @JulesNotVerne What the fuck where have you been for the last 10 days?? Dave (Boyyy) @BigDave4 On holiday…
TMZ Sports @TMZ_Sports SENSATIONAL footage of Ilya Rozanov’s long-anticipated return to Canada! Click through for our video of the hockey superstar’s first steps back on Canadian soil! Dani Dives @damndani You utter fucking vultures. You spread the story that got him fucking arrested and could have gotten him killed and now you ambush him in the airport and shove a camera at him? Dani Dives @damndani Also fuck you @BigDave4 Dave (Boyyy) @BigDave4 Ah shit sorry I really didn’t know ☹
Ottawa Sun @OttawaSun Ottawa’s hero is back! But who was that coming to meet him at the airport? Fans have been speculating about the mystery man, who can be seen in the back seat of the SUV as Rozanov enters – click through to see our experts weigh in. [read whole article] Dani Dives @damndani A fucking SIDE EXIT from the airport and an SUV with TINTED WINDOWS and still there’s a forensic analysis of the two frames in which a smidge of side profile is seen through the open door holy shit this is vile Betsy B @itsbetsybitch 👀 it’s got to be Hollander, though, right? Dani Dives @damndani istg no jury would convict me…
Ottawa Centaurs @OttawaCentaurs We are incredibly relieved to announce that Ilya Rozanov has returned to Canada. The Centaurs stand fully behind Ilya Rozanov, and we’ll be talking with him soon about a timeline for him returning to the ice. In the meantime, we expect he’ll be focusing on his health and on his family here in Canada, so we ask our fans to respect his privacy during this time.
Ilya Rozanov (number 1 hockey player) ✔ @IlyaRozanov I am home in Canada and I am safe. I am very grateful, very tired, and very lucky. Not to worry, I now have full access to my phone – but I am still planning some more time offline with the people I love, before I wade into any social media storms. Thank you for all your support.
Day 10
Ilya Rozanov (number 1 hockey player) ✔ @IlyaRozanov I’ve released a statement about my recent experiences. [Read more] In the past two weeks, there’s been a lot of confusion and conflicting information about my personal life. That wasn’t an accident — it was about keeping me safe. Recently, a video was leaked which showed myself and Shane Hollander embracing in the background. Having the decision to disclose our relationship made for us isn’t ideal, but despite the recent confusion we would like to announce, officially, that we are in a committed, romantic relationship, and have been for several years. This was not something we had planned (yet) to share publicly, and the video leak would have been incredibly stressful under any circumstances. As it happened, however, it was devastating. At the time of the leak, I was in Russia attending to a family matter. Being publicly outed placed me in real danger, and the priority was getting me home. I am here, safe, in Canada, because of friends and loved ones who showed up for me, unhesitatingly and unquestioningly. I want to particularly thank my partner Shane, who instantly realised the danger and rallied a support network around me. I also want to thank a dear friend, who found a way to come stand by my side during the most frightening and lonely time in my life. I also know that my story isn’t unique, and that many LGBTQ+ people don’t have the resources or support that I did. That is something I will never forget. For now, I’m focusing on recovering and on returning as soon as possible to hockey and to the team I love. Thank you for the support and the concern you’ve shown me.
Shane Hollander ✔ @shanehollander24 I’ve released a statement in connection with Ilya Rozanov’s, about recent events. [Read more]. After all the recent confusion, I want to be clear now that Ilya is safe and home in Canada: we’ve been together for several years, and I love him. When the video surfaced, the most important thing was Ilya’s safety. That’s why I said as little as possible, and why what I did say focused on deflecting attention rather than explaining the truth. I understand that this caused confusion, but it came from a place of fear and urgency, not embarrassment or shame. I’m incredibly proud of Ilya, and particularly of the strength he’s shown throughout this terrifying time. I’m also deeply grateful to the friends and professionals who helped get him home safely. I also want to say – firmly – that we don’t hold this unfortunate accident against Hayden. While I’d hope that right now it’s not anyone’s first concern, I still want to make it clear - we have never let our personal relationship interfere with our competitiveness on the ice, and we believe our career achievements show that very clearly. We’ve always kept personal and professional separate, and we hope our teams, our fans, and the league can do the same.
This Hollanov Life @hollanovtruther HOLY SHIT. Holy shit?? H o l y s h i t. Shayden Defender @shayden4eva …Fuck it. You know what, I’ll take it. Red for Rose @imnotprimrose Wait so Rose /was/ bearding, but it was bearding for justice! Queen! #reallifesuperhero Bellamy @flourpower The statements from are terrifying – so good that they’re safe. I guess we’ll never know how much it helped to push the fiancée narrative and the prank thing but fuck, I’m glad we did what we could as fans. Amie High ❤ | Model and actress ✔ @AmieHigh Aww. I really just thought Ilya and Svetlana seemed like a sweet couple.
Ottawa Centaurs @OttawaCentaurs The Ottawa Centaurs are aware of the recent statements from Ilya Rozanov, and we support him fully. His safety and wellbeing are our priority, and we look forward to him re-joining us on the track - where we know he gives his all each and every time. Hockey is for everyone, and the Ottawa Centaurs are proud to stand with the LGBT+ community and with our Captain. Julie Stevens @JulesNotVerne Shall we start running a betting pool on how long it will take the Voyageurs to produce a similarly supportive statement for Hollzy? James Bar 🏒 🌈 @saypuckit Can I put myself forward for 12th of Never?
Scott Hunter ✔ @scotthunterofficial I am so incredibly happy and relieved that you have made it home safely @IlyaRozanov. (And to @ShaneHollander24 - having seen you both play and played with and against you – no one who knows the sport could credibly claim your relationship has lessened your competitive edge!) This Hollanov Life @hollanovtruther DID YOU KNOW??
Hayden Pike @HaydenPike35 @IlyaRozanov so relieved that you’re back safe. @ShaneHollander I will always stand with you, bro. Shayden Defender @shayden4eva So like are you actually bi or was that also a bit?? Hayden Pike @HaydenPike35 �
Rose Landry 🌹 ✔ @roselandry @IlyaRozanov @Shane Hollander Like I said – I can’t wait to dance at your wedding ❤
Svetlana @TheSvetlana Traded a diamond back in for a best friend. 😎
Chapter End Notes
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