Rating:

Teen And Up Audiences

Archive Warning:

No Archive Warnings Apply

Category:

M/M

Fandom:

Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid

Relationship:

Troy Barrett/Harris Drover

Characters:

Troy Barrett, Harris Drover, Adrian Dela Cruz, Rose Landry, Shane Hollander, Ilya Rozanov, Ottawa Centaurs Team Ensemble (Game Changers), Zane Boodram, Cassie Boodram, Wyatt Hayes, Lisa Hayes (Game Changers)

Additional Tags:

Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Baggage, past troy barrett/adrian dela cruz - Freeform, Adrian Dela Cruz Being an Asshole, Past Shane Hollander/Rose Landry, Heartbreak, Mentions of homophobia, Troy Barrett Needs a Hug, publicity stunt, Troy Barrett loves Harris Drover, Harris Drover Loves Troy Barrett, Past Relationship Reveal, Supportive Ottawa Centaurs (Game Changers), Rated T for Trashmouth, tagging is hard, Not Beta Read

Language:

English

Stats:

Published: 2026-06-29 Words: 15,099 Chapters: 1/1

A Hockey Romcom

Summary

It had been announced two weeks ago – in preparation for a hockey-romcom the lead actors asked to join training to get some practice and experience on the ice. Everybody had been incredibly tight-lipped about it all, about which actors would show up at the rink. It still wasn’t a surprise and had been expected by them all that Rose Landry would be one of them. After all, why the fuck else would they fly out to Ottawa of all places? It would have made sense if this was a queer movie, then yeah, there’s no place like Ottawa. At least in the hockey world. But they were told as much that it wasn’t, so the only other explanation was Rose wanting to spend some time with Shane. And the rest of them maybe as well.

“Holy shit,” Hazy gasped, “is that Adrian Dela Cruz?”

Being checked against the boards without his gear on couldn’t be much more painful than the stab in his chest at hearing that. Troy whipped around, towards the tunnel. And right there, chatting with Coach Wiebe, was Adrian.

Notes

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“They’re here,” Haas stage-whispered, gesturing at the tunnel, where Shane and Rose Landry were heading onto the ice. Shane held his hand out to Rose, who just raised her eyebrow at him, and jumped on the ice, skating a circle around Shane, clearly to proof her point of not needing his help.

It had been announced two weeks ago – in preparation for a hockey-romcom the lead actors asked to join training to get some practice and experience on the ice. Everybody had been incredibly tight-lipped about it all, about which actors would show up at the rink. It still wasn’t a surprise and had been expected by them all that Rose would be one of them. After all, why the fuck else would they fly out to Ottawa of all places? It would have made sense if this was a queer movie, then yeah, there’s no place like Ottawa. At least in the hockey world. But they were told as much that it wasn’t, so the only other explanation was Rose wanting to spend some time with Shane. And the rest of them maybe as well.

“I still can’t fucking believe that the expanded Centaur’s circle includes Rose Landry,” LaPointe goggled.

“Keep it together.” A punch to the arm from Bood had him snap out of it, and he looked at their AC, with wide eyes.

“Sorry. But it’s just… It’s Rose Landry!”

“You met her at their wedding.”

“He didn’t meet her at their wedding, he stared at her from a safe distance and didn’t manage to build up the courage to introduce himself to her,” Troy snorted, for which he was pushed by LaPointe. Not that it had much gusto, Troy was right about that, and the kid was quite embarrassed about it all. This was all just hilarious. Until it wasn’t.

“Holy shit,” Hazy gasped, “is that Adrian Dela Cruz?”

Being checked against the boards without his gear on couldn’t be much more painful than the stab in his chest at hearing that. Troy whipped around, back to the tunnel. And right there, chatting with Coach Wiebe, was Adrian.

Fuck. He wore well fitted jeans, a dark green hoodie. Troy had always loved him in green; and whenever Adrian wore green he said it was for Troy, so he could have something lovely to look at. Something he would like. That motherfucker. He had a black toque on, his brown curls just perfectly peeking out from underneath it. He looked fucking perfect and Troy hated it.

“He is really the best part of that show, I mean, he really made the series the success that it is.” Somewhere far off, Troy took notice of Hazy’s rambles about that superhero series Adrian had been on. Because of course his teammates would be a fan of his cheating ex. “He’s a really good actor.”

That much was true. Troy really had believed that Adrian had loved him.

Could Troy spontaneously call in sick? Nobody would buy that. He didn’t even need to bother hiding in Harris’ office, because his boyfriend was off work today. The one fucking day that Harris had a doctor’s appointment and wasn’t at the office his ex-boyfriend showed up. Of fucking course. All sneaking out wouldn’t work though; to get out of here, he’d either have to go past Adrian, or jump the boards which would be enough of a ruckus that everyone would notice.

“And then in season two, he had that story line that…” Troy didn’t even bother trying to pay attention to Hazy’s media analysis. He was locked in on his ex. Who he hadn’t spoken to in two years. Who he hadn’t seen in person in even longer. There was no avoiding him. Well, he probably could be shielded from him, but then he’d have to tell the team their whole history. Which would only end a mess.

Fuck it, Troy was a grown fucking man, he could deal with his ex. Probably. Hopefully.

Troy watched, as Adrian stepped on the ice. He definitely did not have the same grace and confidence with which Rose was still skating circles around Hollander (who, unlike Troy, really didn’t seem to mind being around his ex) and Rozanov. Adrian held onto the boards, Holmberg all of a sudden there to steady him.

Oh, that was such a fucking trick. Yeah, Adrian had never been a great skater, but come on. Was that just a dirty trick to hold onto a good-looking, muscular hockey player?

“Hey.” The sudden hand on his shoulder had Troy come back to the people around him. “You good man?”

“Yeah, sure, I’m…” The words died in his throat, as Adrian let his gaze wander around the rink, spotted Troy, and they locked eyes.

Fuck.

A small smile spread over Adrian’s face, and he actually skated over, Holmberg right there to help him. Ugh, Troy was about to be sick.

Troy was more than over him. And he was for sure over their break-up. Seeing Adrian now definitely did not stir up any bad memories about one of the worst fucking periods of his life. He was over that break-up. That’s what he kept repeating in his mind, as Adrian Dela Cruz skated over, shakily, but well enough, coming to a wobbly stop in front of him.

“Whoops!” he chuckled, throwing his arms around to balance himself out again. “Been a while since I’ve been on the ice. Hi. I wanted to introduce myself, I’m Adrian.”

“Hi.”

“Uhm hi.” Clearly, the folks around them noticed Troy’s weird mood. Didn’t comment on it, though. “Nice to meet you. I’m Zane Boodram, alternate captain. That’s Jeremy LaPointe, Wyatt Hayes and Troy Barrett. And you met Holmberg already.”

“It’s nice to meet you guys, too,” he smiled around the group. That was his camera smile, the one that wasn’t quite real, but close enough that most people didn’t recognize the fake behind it. Unless of course those people knew him as well as Troy did. Then again, how well had he ever really known that man? “And I really appreciate it so much, that we get to join your practice today. Especially me, I am definitely missing Rose’s expertise.”

“I mean, she only dated Shane for what, a month? Maybe two? But something must’ve stuck,” Hazy chuckled.

“Not sure that dating a hockey player is what gets you good on skates.” Adrian looked back at Troy.

“True. Otherwise, Harris would be the best hockey player in Canada.” Troy hadn’t meant to sound bitchy, but that raised eyebrow of Adrian’s suggested that he had failed in that endeavour.

“Harris?”

“Yeah, my boyfriend.” I don’t fucking need you. I levelled up like you couldn’t believe. No matter how much he might want to, Troy couldn’t really say that to Adrian. Especially not in front of the rest of their team. For one, it would alert them all to their history. But more than that, it would be really fucking childish.

“I wouldn’t count Harris out completely,” Hazy chuckled, good naturedly nudging Troy’s shoulder.

“Yeah, he’s the best,” Bood agreed.

“Don’t need to tell me,” he agreed and skated towards the group of hockey players that had congregated around Rose.

Most days Troy knew that he deserved Harris. That he wasn’t dragging Harris down with him, or had tricked him to be with a douchebag. Most days. Other days it was a lot rougher. But Harris stayed. Stayed by his side, stayed supportive, and kept on reassuring Troy that they deserved each other until he believed it again. Troy could probably do with some of that relentless and blinding optimism and pure, unfiltered love right now.

Why did Harris’ doctor appointment have to be today of all days? Well, he knew. Because they had film stars with their own publicity people here. There were five of them, a whole bunch of cameras and other equipment between them, currently putting everything together. Gen was there, representing the Centaurs. With that many publicity people in the building, Harris had decided against rescheduling his cardiology check-up. Troy told himself that Harris was fine. He was all healed up and the biggest reason for him to do these check-ups as often as he did was to appease his slightly overly worried family. “He’s fine,” he mumbled to himself under his breath; maybe hearing it said out loud would help Troy believe it.

“You good, man?” Haas nudged his arm.

“I’m fine.”

“I miss Harris, too. Maybe not in the same way as you. Hopefully not in the same way as you,” Luca corrected himself and then grinned so widely, Troy couldn’t help cracking a smile, too. Ok, there was some of that pure optimism Troy needed.

“So do I.”

“Honestly, I’m mostly sad for him that he’s missing working with Rose Landry.”

“Ah, he’ll be fine.” They stayed where they were, watching the commotion of two movie stars on their rink.

“Excited about him, too?” Troy asked, nodding vaguely into Adrian’s direction. Why did he ask that? He was a fucking masochist, that’s why.

“Eh,” Haas shrugged, watching Adrian stumble a bit on the ice.

“Eh?”

“I mean, he’s alright, he’s just… I don’t know.”

Haas blushed a little, and Troy could see he wanted to say something he deemed mean. And Troy needed to hear that. “Say it,” he grinned.

“Uhm.” He looked around, lowering his voice. “Overrated.”

Troy had expected more. Or had hoped for more. But that was genuinely good enough for him right now. He wasn’t the only one seeing past all the glamour and sparkling eyes and blinding smiles. “Couldn’t agree more.”

Not too long later, Coach called them all together. Troy stuck with Haas, he really made him feel better about this whole fucking day. He did not keep an eye out for Adrian, thank you very much. The only reason he stayed aware of where he was on the ice was so Troy could avoid him.

“Ok, practice today is going to be a little different, I don’t know if you noticed, but we got two new players on the team,” Wiebe smiled. Rose and Adrian waved around the group, the hockey players cheering. “I will leave the introductions to you for breaks or the after-party.”

“Better work up a good appetite,” Bood called out. After the announcement that they’d have some guests at practice, he had invited everyone for a barbecue, saying it had been way too long since the last. It had only been three weeks or so, but whatever made the man happy.

“I’m sure that won’t be a problem,” Wiebe continued. “About today. We obviously are not allowed to know too much about the movie you two will be shooting.”

“That’s ok, coach, I’m bringing vodka tonight, so Rose will talk,” Rozanov grinned, for which Rose slapped his chest. And he just gasped. “That is how you treat me after I invite you to my team?”

“Shane invited me,” she shot back, wrapping an arm around his waist. He was a little blushed, but Shane played along, putting his arm around her shoulder. Roz said something in Russian, which had Shane biting his grin down hard, but didn’t respond.

It was a good call of Wiebe to continue, because that would have escalated, just a little. “We are very happy about our guests,” he said with emphasis, “and will treat you with all the respect and kindness we got.” Yeah, the only way Troy would be able to treat Adrian with kindness was if he stayed far away from him. “And of course we won’t have twenty guys training the two of you.” Wiebe explained the set ups, about accuracy training for the pros, while a few of them broke off to practice something specific with the actors.

“Do we get to choose who trains us?” Adrian asked, and something in Troy’s stomach flipped. God no.

“I don’t see why not,” Wiebe smiled.

“I call dibs on Hollander,” Rose grinned, and beamed up at him. “I’m sure he can show me some moves.”

“Oh no, no showing moves here,” Ilya made clear. “Rule – you cannot show moves to your ex. Especially in front of the new partner.”

Rose’s puppy eyes and Ilya’s badly suppressed grin didn’t hold long, as Troy used that chance to get out of this. “Hey, if it keeps the peace, I’ll show you the moves,” he offered, smiling at Rose, holding out his hand. “Then Cap doesn’t need to be jealous.”

“Sure, Troy, lead the way.” Rose laughed as she let go of Shane, at which Roz did an overexaggerated sigh, and instead wrapped her arm around Troy’s. The rest of them organized themselves, Troy didn’t bother paying any attention on what or with who Adrian was training, and focussed on his trainee.

“Did Coach say we should work on something specific?” he asked, not really having paid any kind of attention to instructions.

“Don’t really care, to be honest. Help me with the backwards skating, I always mess that up.” Taking both of his hands in hers, Rose slowly, and a little unsteadily, started to move backwards, holding onto Troy for balance.

“Yeah, that can be tricky,” he chuckled, happy to focus on Rose and ignore everything else around them. He moved along, pushing her over the ice at first, giving up more and more control to her, but being the steady balance for her to build up the confidence.

“WOAH!” Rose cried out, taking one turn a little too sharp. Troy just about managed to regain balance before she took the both of them down, and wrapped his arm around her waist to keep them both upright.

“Steady,” he chuckled. “Don’t ruin my rep by having us trip.”

“Men and their fucking egos,” Rose rolled her eyes, slapping his chest, but holding quite tightly onto his shoulders. “No but thanks for not letting us fall, I don’t want to trip either.”

“We won’t. We got this, yeah?” With a wink, Troy pushed a little back again, hand in hand once again. By now Troy hardly moved and let Rose pull him over the ice. Which was genuinely lovely.

A loud cheer did quickly pull his attention towards a group of his teammates, practicing shooting with Adrian. “What’s this fucking movie about anyways? He’s playing the hockey star, you’re the fangirl?”

“Something like that.”

“Aw come on,” Troy snorted, “clearly you should play the hockey star, you’re so much better on the ice.”

“Thanks. Would be fun, but I don’t think that’s gonna happen.”

“Bullshit.”

“You’re telling me.” Rose picked up the speed, taking the next turn a little sharper.

“Damn, nice one,” he grinned.

“I know,” she grinned right back. “My brothers all play hockey and while I never played, I spent a lot of time on the ice as well. Trying to impress the hockey guys.”

“Did it work?”

“Well, I don’t know if you heard, but I did date Shane Hollander. So…”

Troy couldn’t help it, he laughed so hard at that, he almost lost his balance.

“I do not appreciate this reaction,” was her somewhat deadpan retort, before she too started chuckling. “Yeah, as it turns out my hockey skills are not enough to impress Shane Hollander.”

“I feel you; the fact that it took Ilya Rozanov to impress him is humbling literally everyone in the MLH.” Steady again, Troy stood next to Rose, holding out just one hand. “Come on, I can still be impressed.”

“Challenge so accepted,” she chuckled, and together they skated backwards.

“So, how’s it going?” After a bit of gradually getting faster and faster, Hollander appeared in front of them.

“Look at us!” Rose grinned, and Troy had to admit that yeah, they looked amazing. They had found a good rhythm, skating in sync, moving smoothly over the ice. “It’s going great!”

“I can see that.”

“Aw, are you jealous, Hollander?” Troy smirked. “Worried I’m making a move on your girl?”

Shane just raised an eyebrow. “Yes. I could feel the sexual tension from all the way across the rink.”

“That’s your husband, sweetie,” Rose smiled extra sweetly at Shane. “Judging from the way he’s looking at us right now, you might not go out with us this evening.”

It was hilarious, how fast Shane blushed. He quickly turned, looking at Rozanov. Troy didn’t bother following his line of sight, he’d seen those lovingly horned-up looks on their faces way too often.

“Anyways,” Hollander changed the subject, “there are a few jealous voices in the team that you’re hogging all of Rose’s attention.”

“Maybe I’m hogging all of Troy’s attention?” she shot back before Troy could say almost the same thing.

“Yeah!”

“Come on, before Hazy goes all superhero fanboy on Adrian.”

“Oh, so he can go all superhero fanboy on me?” Rose held her free hand out to Shane, which he took with a smile, and the three of them skated - backwards - to where most of the team was huddled up together.

“That looked genuinely good, Rose,” Wiebe praised her. “As if you’ve done it for ages.”

“Had a great trainer,” she smiled back, nudging Troy’s side.

“Looked like it.” Adrian turned his eyes to Troy, who feared he knew what was next. “I wouldn’t mind if you showed me some moves, too.” Troy really hoped he only imagined the double-entendre in his voice, but couldn’t quite keep the tension down.

At least some of the rest must’ve felt the tension building in Troy, and he felt a few concerned and confused looks coming his way. Damnit. Roz had stated that whole ‘don’t show moves to your ex’ thing and for a moment Troy was genuinely tempted to pull that card. Sorry, he’d say, but cap said exes aren’t allowed to skate together. What a pity. But I’m sure someone else’ll love to show you!  It was a nice fantasy, but that was all it was. The reality was that Troy did not want to hash this out in front of his team.

But one thing was fucking clear, Troy would not be holding hands with Adrian.

“No offense,” he said, as he grabbed a hockey stick, “I think you should work on skating forwards before getting ahead of yourself.”

“Fair,” Adrian nodded, seemingly getting what that hockey stick was for, and followed Troy away from the group to where they had some more room to move.

“Hold on to this.” He held the end of the hockey stick out to Adrian, who raised his eyebrow.

“What, Rose gets to hold your hand and I don’t?”

“You can’t be fucking serious,” Troy snorted.

“Ok, ok, fair enough.” He grabbed the end of the hockey stick.

“Right. Let’s build up your confidence. I’ll help at first, but I’ll do less and less to keep us moving.”

“I get it.” Adrian did search his face for eye contact. Which Troy managed to avoid very well. “Let’s go.”

It was a little shaky, as they took their first steps, Troy doing a lot of the heavy lifting, all but pulling Adrian across the ice. But slowly but surely there was more push coming from him. There were a lot of unkind things Troy could say about him, but at least he was taking this all seriously.

“So,” Adrian started after a while of silent skating. “Harris?”

“What about him?”

“I’m curious. Tell me about him.”

Harris is wonderful. He is sweet, and caring, and funny, and strong, and so sexy. And he loves me. Really loves me.

“Is that why you’re here? To ask me about my boyfriend?”

“What? No!” For a professional actor, Adrian wasn’t a great liar. “We’re doing that hockey movie and we’re here because Rose knows all of you.”

“Bullshit.” They rounded the corner, skating past the team. Troy waited with continuing, until they were out of earshot of the rest of them. “You didn’t need to come all the way to fucking Ottawa for that. You could have joined practice with the team in LA or Vancouver with zero issues. You didn’t need personal connections to get a training session in. So tell me.” Now, Troy actually looked up, locking eyes. “Why the fuck are you here?”

Adrian kept the eye contact as he answered. “Fine. I’m here because I wanted to see you.”

“Why?”

“I… Look. After we…”

“After you dumped me.”

“Yeah, that. I didn’t keep tabs on your career. Or hockey in general. I was curious, don’t get me wrong, but I thought it would be best to keep that door closed.” Not that that door had ever really been open; Adrian had hardly kept up with hockey even while they were dating. “And then my agent got me that audition for a hockey movie. And it made me feel nostalgic. And, in preparation for that, I googled you, and what you were up to, and how your career was going. And…” He took a deep breath, tried to lock eyes, but Troy looked anywhere but him. “It really sucks what happened to you in Toronto. I’m really sorry about it all, but that was really fucking brave what you did.” Troy really didn’t need that right now. He didn’t need any of this right now. “And I’m really sorry about the timing of it all.” Troy didn’t react to the apology, to that soft fucking look he got from Adrian, who continued with a sigh. “Anyways, I got the part, and Rose and I met, and everyone knows she got connections to Hollander. And I knew that you’re on the same team now, so…” He left the rest unsaid.

“So what? Am I supposed to be grateful that you’re here?”

“No, of course not, I just…” They went silent again, as they passed the team. “I thought that maybe we could talk,” he said, after they skated past them again.

“About what?” It was getting pretty hard to stay calm, and pretend like his skin wasn’t crawling with fire that was begging to be let out.

“You know, we’re both out now, and pretty much on top of our respective game. We still got a lot in common, so maybe we can put the past behind us and move on.”

“Move on?” Troy snorted. “You cheated on me. I thought neither of us was ready to come out, all the while you were getting engaged to someone else.”

“Troy, I…”

“It was months, Adrian. For months you strung me along. And if you hadn’t gotten engaged when you did, you would have just kept on playing me. Why? What the fuck for? To have someone for phone sex every now and again?”

“Not like there was much else we could do, was there?”

“And that’s my fucking fault now?” Troy caught himself getting louder and, remembering where he was, he took a breath, keeping it down again. “I tried.”

“Yeah, you really tried to be someone ready to be out and proud,” Adrian snorted, and that sent icy dagger all through Troy’s soul.

“I know I wasn’t someone anyone would want to date in public, I fucking get that. But that’s not the point,” he sighed, feeling the first round of tears stinging in his eyes. “God, how often was I thinking about coming out for you. With you.”

“Really?” Adrian raised his eyebrow, clearly doubting Troy. And yeah, why wouldn’t he? Toronto-Troy was the worst fucking person. Troy had always made sure to not show Adrian his ugly side, and while Adrian hadn’t kept up with hockey before they broke up, Troy wouldn’t be surprised if rumours and stories had reached his ears.

“Yes. Because I was so head over heels in love with you.” Adrian slightly averted his eyes at that. Which made Troy even angrier. “I thought both of us were so in love. I guess you were. Just not with me.” Troy dropped the stick; they had stopped skating in any case. He wasn’t quite sure when they stopped moving, but it had to have been a moment or so.

“Troy, I really am sorry.” Adrian looked up at him again. Genuine remorse on his face, which helped Troy’s fight against the need to scream. “I really am. I didn’t string you along to toy with you or anything, I just… The times we had together were good. I wasn’t ready to let go of that.”

“How the fuck does that work? How can you hold on to our fun, while actively building a life with someone else?”

“It made sense at the time.” What a non-answer. Troy just scoffed, not having the words to express the level of bullshit he was hearing here. “I now know it doesn’t.”

“Whatever.” Troy couldn’t take much more of this. “What now? What the fuck you want to do with all that now? You said sorry, now everything’s great and it’s all rainbows and fucking lollipops?”

“Of course not, I just thought…”

“Well, you thought wrong.”

“Troy…”

“No, Adrian, I’m done. With you, with this. This is all the closure you’re gonna get. I am not ready to forgive, I don’t know if I ever will, but you gotta deal with that. It took so fucking much to get over you, and I’m not going to waste any more energy on you. I’m done. I’m done!” he repeated with added emphasis, when Adrian opened his mouth to speak again.

He bent over to grab the hockey stick from the ground. Troy wouldn’t leave training, he was professional enough for that. But that one-on-one with Adrian was done with. And Adrian got it, skating behind Troy back to the rest of the team, not speaking up again.

Good.

Maybe good. A part of Troy wanted to hear more. Wanted to understand what the fuck had gone on in Adrian’s mind to pull all that bullshit back then. Maybe a part of Troy wanted Adrian to fight for Troy’s forgiveness in a way he hadn’t fought for their relationship.

But no. Troy was done. There was nothing more that Adrian could say. And no matter what he would say, it wouldn’t change anything. It was all done. There was no excusing what Adrian had done back then. Besides, Troy had Harris. Whatever Adrian might have to offer, Troy didn’t need it. Didn’t want it. Never would want it again.

Adrian fumbled with the sleeves of his hoodie as he watched the pros flying over the ice. When he and Troy had rejoined the team after their little… well, whatever one would call that, the whole rink had been on edge. Tense. They for sure all felt that tension between himself and Troy, but none of them seemed to know about their past. Which was something. Something good for sure, Adrian was pretty damn certain that if those people knew how their relationship had ended, he would have quite uncomfortably been tossed out of the rink. Still, nobody commented on anything, and Adrian happily ignored the looks that went around the room.

The decision that he and Rose would get a bit of a break was very welcome, Adrian already knew how sore he would be tomorrow. Not that he wasn’t fit, but he used muscles today he didn’t know he had. So now here they sat, in those uncomfortable plastic seats behind the boards, watching the hockey players running drills. What the point of these was, Adrian wasn’t sure. But that wasn’t his job.

“Yeah, I’m not skating like that in our movie,” he commented drily, as another one flew past them.

“Let’s be grateful for the magic of filming. And green screen. And stunt doubles,” Rose chuckled.

“True that.”

It was a few more minutes of watching, when a new voice came up behind them. “Uhm, hello!”

They turned to the guy standing there, smiling so widely, waving at them.

“I definitely remember you from the wedding,” Rose smiled, as she got up and went straight to hugging him. He just as happily hugged back, not in a weird omigod-a-movie-star-is-hugging-me-way, but in a genuinely friendly and happy-to-be-here-way. “Good to see you, Harris.”

Harris. Was that the man Troy was dating now? If so, Adrian had to say, he was a little underwhelmed. And maybe a bit confused. Him? Really? That guy looked as if someone had drawn a caricature of a Canadian man. And added some more flannel shirts, just to be safe. The pride pins were a nice touch, albeit a little cheesy. That guy was also not an athlete. Not that he was ugly, but someone so obsessed with working out like Troy was with a guy who looked like that?

But hey, some part of Adrian felt pretty good for looking that much better than his ex’s new guy. At least he had that going for him.

“Harris, this is Adrian.” Adrian got up to shake Harris’ hand and was greeted by a pretty cold look. Oh, yeah, ok, that guy knew what had happened between him and Troy. “You haven’t met yet, have you?”

“We haven’t,” Harris shook his head, as he shook Adrian’s hand. “But you know my boyfriend, don’t you?”

Rose’s eyebrows shot into her hairline, as her eyes went wide.

“You’re Troy’s boyfriend.”

“I am.”

“You are a lucky guy,” Adrian offered, not sure what else to say here.

“The luckiest,” he nodded with a smile and something in his eyes that was a lot of things but not friendly.

“Harris!” He was kept from saying more, when the team spotted the man, and someone called out his name.

“Hey guys,” he waved, walking over to the bench, where someone was holding out his arm for a fist bump. “How’s practice going?”

“Just got so much better.” Troy skated over from somewhere inside that group of people and leaned against the board, beaming at Harris. And oh. That was a lot of love and adoration directed at a guy in a green-blue flannel with a rainbow pin in the shape of an apple.

“All good?”

“Everything’s in perfect condition,” Harris smiled back.

“That you are,” Troy smirked. Adrian thought for a moment that maybe Troy did all that to send a message. Make him jealous or anything. But the more he watched the looks between Troy and his man, the more he realized that the rest of the world had disappeared to Troy the moment he saw Harris. And that felt… Well. A lot of things. None of them great. What the fuck did that guy have that made Troy look like that?

“I do have one question.” Harris grabbed his phone from his pocket. “Why did Gen sent me a picture of you all cuddled up with superstar Rose Landry?”

“Because I don’t hide my affairs?” Troy shot back and ouch. That one was definitely meant for Adrian.

“What’s the salacious picture?” one of the hockey players asked.

“Well,” Harris cleared his throat, before starting his description. “There is Troy’s hand, firmly on Rose’s waist, who’s holding onto his shoulder as if that would save her from drowning, all the while they’re both smiling and laughing as if it’s the best thing that ever happened to them.”

“I mean, come on,” Rose laughed, “we would make one hot couple, Barrett!”

“Not saying you wouldn’t,” Harris continued, as the Centaurs looked at the picture on his phone, laughter going through the group. “You still got some explaining to do.”

“What can I say,” Troy shrugged. “Rose has good taste. Everyone knows that me and Shane are the hottest people on this team.”

“Booo!”

“Oh, fuck off Barrett, you are not!”

No, he really was. The need to say that out loud and join in on the discussion was itching under his skin, but Adrian was pretty sure that if he said anything about Troy, even if it was a compliment about his hotness, he would be in trouble. Troy, and Harris, clearly were too beloved by their team for him to have any chance. So, even if it wasn’t like him to be quiet and sit back, for his safety that was exactly what he would do.

“Wait, so Rose’s type is gay hockey player?” That came from the assistant? Alternative? Whatever that A on the jersey of the other captain stood for. Adrian really should brush up on hockey terminology before the official press for this movie would start.

“At least I’m consistent,” Rose called back. “And it’s not like anyone can blame me; the two of you are fire.”

Hollander blushed immensely, and Troy’s grin only widened as he turned to his boyfriend. “You look like you’re about to start a self-help-group with Rozanov.”

“Fantastic idea,” the Russian guy nodded. “We will meet once a week. You will bring Chiron, I will bring Anya. And we will self-help ourselves about Rose being in love with our partners.”

“You do that,” Troy laughed. And something about that laughter did something to Adrian. Not in a romantic sense, not for a long time. But something still stuck with him. He had never seen Troy in a hockey setting. For obvious reasons they had never visited each other at work. There would have been no straight explanation for why Adrian would visit practice or come to a game, wearing Troy’s jersey. It would have been even trickier the other way around; people in the acting industry were a lot more perceptive about all things gay. Had Troy visited him on set, people definitely would have started talking. They might have been able to spin it, had he come to a game or practice; the hockey world was sometimes painfully straight and heteronormative. But they could not have chanced it. Therefore Adrian did not have proof that Troy acted differently here than in his last team, or while they were together. But he would be genuinely surprised, if Troy had been that open in Toronto. That free. Now, surrounded by his entire team and a whole bunch of public relations people, he was laughing and beaming at his boyfriend as if he had hung the sun and moon and stars.

Had he ever looked at Adrian like that? Not in public, of course not, but behind closed doors. Adrian was pretty sure that yes. Troy had. Because once upon a time it had been that sparkle in his eyes that had drawn him in. But he also had to admit that for around the second half of their relationship, Adrian hadn’t paid Troy enough attention to notice looks like that.

The flirting in front of him continued on. “Can someone quickly distract Coach so I don’t get in trouble for PDA?”

“As long as you keep it rated G we’ll be fine,” the coach chuckled.

And then Adrian watched, as Troy leaned over the boards, pulling that guy close and kissed him. Harris smiled into that kiss, cupping Troy’s cheeks.

Yeah. When Troy said he was done with Adrian and everything they once had, he really meant it. Which didn’t feel great. Adrian wasn’t jealous. He and Justin were going strong, and yes, their marriage had their ups and downs, but their relationship was good. This whole thing in front of him was nothing he needed to be jealous of. It still felt weird to see his ex that in love with someone else. Especially when Adrian hadn’t really made the effort to notice that love when it was directed at him.

“Alright Barrett,” the coach chuckled, “let Harris do his job. And do yours,” the coach added with a snorted laugh.

“Yes sir,” Troy grinned, before turning over to where Rose was sitting, blew her a kiss, pointedly ignored Adrian, and skated off.

Harris joined the rest of the publicity people and the hockey players dispersed over the ice, following the orders being called out by their coach and Rozanov. Rose moved a little in her seat, crossing her arms, and Adrian could feel the interrogation that was about to start.

“Talk.” She looked straight ahead, watching as the hockey players fired the puck between themselves in what seemed to be impossible speeds.

“Troy’s my ex,” he mumbled, trying to keep it quiet.

“Figured as much. You fucked up, didn’t you?”

“How’d you get that idea?”

“I hope for your sake that was sarcasm and that you didn’t just try to insult my intelligence here. YEAH, GO LUCA!” she called out, and one player, probably Luca, looked up and Adrian was pretty sure he was blushing under that helmet. “So. What did you do?”

Fuck, there was no way he’d get around that. This was not going how he had hoped it would. “There… There was some overlap with Troy and Justin,” he answered, hoping they could leave it at that.

Rose was silent, her judgement growing heavily next to him. “Please tell me Justin knows.”

Adrian nodded. Justin had known almost the whole time. It had started flirty between them when they met, but Justin had been his director. There was no way in hell that Adrian could date his director while they were filming. That would have meant even more trouble. So some harmless flirting, that’s how Adrian justified it to himself. And then Justin asked him out after they finished filming. And what’s one dinner? Or two, or three? After their third date, Justin had invited him to his place. Adrian had accepted. And being kissed, and touched like that? Without a phone screen in between? God. It had been incredible. So incredible in fact that it took Adrian coming down from his second orgasm to remember that there was someone else in his life. And he told Justin. How he was in a long-distance relationship. Both of them in the closet, no plans of changing that for either of them. Justin hadn’t been mad. Instead he had asked a question: “is that relationship giving you what you need?” And it hadn’t. Troy was great. And when they got around to talking, it was genuinely amazing. But how often did they get to talk? Different time zones, Troy’s roadtrips, Adrian’s shooting schedules… It didn’t work. It hadn’t worked in a long time. Maybe it had never worked. Not as a solid relationship at least. It was nice. It was good, and fun and all, but it wasn’t a relationship. It admittedly hadn’t taken a lot for Adrian to convince himself of that. And to convince himself that Troy had to feel the same way.

Shortly after they came out, the two of them were snuggled up in their bed together, scrolling through a lot of genuinely supportive comments on social media. Adrian’s mind did go to Troy then. Some wistfulness, yes, but mostly he had felt correct in what he had done. Because no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t see himself coming out with Troy. What he had with Justin – there was no world he could have gotten that with Troy. Or would have even wanted that with Troy. So he had been correct.

Adrian still believed that Justin was the right man for him, not Troy. And from what he had witnessed just now, Adrian apparently wasn’t the man for Troy either. Which he had admittedly known when they were still together. And Adrian could admit well enough that he had done Troy dirty. And fucked up. Using this chance to get them both over what had happened had been a fair enough plan. But it was also not completely surprising that it hadn’t worked.

Which was a pity, in a personal and emotional sense, yes, but professionally too. Because maybe he had hoped a reconciliation would work out for his publicity, too. Adrian already knew that Rose would get so much more attention for this movie, just because she used to date Shane Hollander for a couple of weeks. Well, Adrian dated Troy Barrett for two fucking years. Naturally, due to how that ended, that was nothing he would want to be public in too many details, but still. If they formed a friendship, and could show the connection that they had, or used to have, at least in some way, that would be great for his image and would help him keep up with Rose in that regard.

But yeah, that wasn’t going to happen. If Adrian as much as suggested that he and Troy were close, in whatever way, Troy or Harris would probably make sure that he had a social media shit storm on his hand. And that would really fuck up his brand.

At least he got closure in that regard. That door was closed; they would not form a tentative friendship at some point down the road and that was ok. And Adrian could put that whole chapter of his life to rest and close the book on Troy Barrett for good.

Once the actors left the ice, practice was great. Troy managed to focus on the drills, doing a damn good job of it too, and then Harris showed up and life was fucking gold for a moment. There was this tiny voice in the back of Troy’s mind that was happy that Adrian got to see this. Got to see how fucking happy Troy was. How fucking happy Troy was with Harris. And he didn’t even feel bad about how much joy that petty little voice brought him.

Naturally though, with this whole practice being their big publicity thing to promote their movie, the hockey players themselves didn’t quite get around having a few questions asked. It wasn’t deep stuff, just some questions that any romcom-lover who knew nothing about hockey could follow along. Troy for sure wasn’t mad about it; he had already used up more than enough of his mental capabilities for the day.

It was lucky, he thought, that he was interviewed together with Haas and Dykstra, two guys who weren’t all that starstruck with their guests today. So there wasn’t too much gushing when they were asked about training with two actors today.

“They did a great job,” Troy answered, and as long as he mentally stayed with Rose, it would sound genuine. “Especially because they took it seriously and genuinely tried to improve.”

“Shows a real appreciation for the game,” Dykstra nodded.

There were a few more questions along the lines of ‘what do you love about hockey?’ until they got to go to change and shower, and then Troy sat in Harris’ car on the way to Bood’s.

They were silent at first, Troy resting his hand on Harris’ knee, brushing his fingers a little absentmindedly over it. Something nice and repetitive, almost meditative to help him clear his mind. Maybe. If he pretended really hard, it worked.

“So?” Harris eventually asked, “how was practice?”

So much for emptying his mind. Troy couldn’t keep the laugh in. It wasn’t an amused one, he just didn’t know what else to do. This whole situation was just fucked up.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know he would be here, I would have told you and…”

“Hey, I know.” Troy looked over, a small smile on his face. “I know you would have. Not your fault or your… I don’t know. It was… fucked,” was the word he eventually settled on. Troy turned back to the front, looking at the bumper of the car driving in front of them. “I don’t know if it would have been better if I had known beforehand or not.” What if he had known? He probably would have freaked out for days before calling in sick.

“Did you talk?”

“Yeah. Didn’t want to, but hey.” Troy gave a quick recap of that conversation they had while skating. “So, fun.”

“So, closure, sounds like. Proud of you.” Harris put his hand on Troy’s, squeezing it a bit. Troy wasn’t sure what to say to that, so he just enjoyed the touch, letting some tension wash away. It wouldn’t all go away; Adrian would be there at Bood’s, and as long as they were in the same town, Troy would be tense. At least Adrian knew not to bother him anymore. And Harris was there now. And not just on the other side of the boards, but right there, in reach. Holding his hand.

“He knew who I was,” Harris commented after a bit, as he parked in front of Bood’s house. Neither made the move to get out of the car though, both of them knowing that this conversation was not quite over just yet. Troy turned to Harris, not sure what he was talking about. “Adrian, I mean. When I went to introduce myself, he knew that I’m your boyfriend.”

“Right.” Troy blushed a little. Blurting out about his boyfriend the first chance he got had been a little bit middleschool of him. “I might have used the first opportunity to tell him that I levelled up. Not that I put it that way. But yeah.”

Harris chuckled, squeezing his hand. “I mean, I don’t look like a movie star but…”

“Omigod.” Troy sighed, interrupting Harris and, as well as he could in the confines of this car, leaned over and cupped Harris’ face. “Sure, he’s good looking. Whatever. But you.” He locked eyes with Harris, to really drive this point home. “You are the most beautiful, the hottest, most sexy man I have ever gotten the privilege to love. When I say I levelled up, I mean it. I mean it when it comes to your everything. Your amazing heart, your soul, your smile and omigod, the sex?” That got Harris laughing, and that just wouldn’t do. Troy loved that laugh, but he had a little more message to deliver. So, simplest way to shut him up, Troy kissed him. “And.” Troy leaned back, taking in those beautiful eyes, filled with so much love, it almost knocked the breath out of him. “I levelled up where it comes to arm candy, because you are so fucking beautiful.”

Troy hardly had the chance to marvel at the way Harris’ eyes went so soft, and loving, as he closed the distance between their lips and ran his hands up Troy’s back. He sighed into the kiss and let the rest of the world wash away until Harris’ touch was the only thing that registered anymore.

Until a loud knocking at the car’s window had them jump apart. And maybe Troy let out a not all that manly yelp. But that was more than deserved for being ripped out of this little bubble of perfection.

“Keep it in your pants!” Rozanov called. Of course it was Rozanov.

Harris started chuckling. Troy was still a little awkwardly perched over the middle console, so when he dropped his head, it landed on his boyfriend’s shoulder. “Fuck off, Roz.”

“No, no. Shane said I’m not allowed to blow him in the car, so you don’t get to either.”

“Fucking hell,” Troy groaned in unison with Shane’s slightly horrified: “shut up!”

“Don’t pretend like you don’t want it…” There were a lot of things Troy didn’t need in his life. Hearing Rozanov’s seductive voice definitely was one of them.

“Ok, ok,” Troy surrendered, “we got it, we’ll be good. Fuck.” He climbed back onto his own seat and exchanged one last look with Harris, who was grinning so widely. “I love you,” Troy said, a little quieter. Rozanov and Hollander were still standing out there, and that was none of their business.

“I love you, too.”

Outside the car they were greeted by Rozanov, wearing the biggest smirk and Hollander, still being somewhat flushed from Ilya’s comment about their car-activities that Troy really didn’t want to think about.

“You’re a menace,” Troy made clear, grabbing the case of cider from the trunk.

“And you’re welcome for my presence,” Ilya winked and, putting his arm around Shane’s shoulder, they walked into the garden, Troy and Harris on their tail.

Troy had been at a lot of those barbecues. And as of the first one they mostly had one thing in common - Troy having arrived with Harris, carrying a case of apple cider into the kitchen. And wasn’t that something.

They were among the last to arrive, groups of hockey players and spouses surrounded movie stars and their publicity team out on the deck, in the living room and around Bood’s grill. Troy put the cider in the fridge and retreated to the kitchen for a moment. Just for a bit, to collect himself. To not freak out about or at his ex out there.

“Hiding from the insanity?” Cassie was in the kitchen, rocking baby Milo on her arm, who was crying his eyes out.

“Maybe,” he smiled. “The insanity getting to you too?” he asked the little kid. About one, one-and-a-half years old and so freaking cute. Even when he was crying like that. “I would assume it is way past your bedtime, sir.”

“It is,” Cassie sighed. “That’s the problem. He’s tired out of his mind but won’t go to sleep.” She took a deep breath. “And I would really like to go out there, get something to eat and maybe oggle some movie stars, but someone has a different idea here.”

“I can take him.” Troy surprised himself a little bit with that suggestion, but he really did not want to goggle the movie stars out there. Well, one of them at least. Still. That didn’t mean that Troy, who had no idea how to handle a baby, should be looking after one now.

Unfortunately, Cassie looked like she was contemplating his offer. “That’s really sweet. Maybe just a bit? Then I can pee, grab just a glass of water, and keep my arms from falling off.”

“Sure,” Troy nodded, trying to sound convincing and held his arm out. “Hey, buddy.”

“Milo, hun, want to say hi to Troy for a little bit? And your mama’s gonna be right back, yeah, baby?” The hope that Milo would stop crying the moment he was in Troy’s arms unfortunately didn’t come true, but it didn’t seem to get worse, which was a win in his book. “I’ll be right back,” Cassie promised and hurried out of the kitchen towards the bathroom.

Troy tried to copy what he had seen on TV and in movies about people calming babies, rocking them up and down, whispering some “shhh, shhh,” over and over again. When that didn’t work anymore, he just tried talking to the kid. “You know, Milo, this is really counterproductive. You are tired. But you refuse to go to sleep.” Milo looked up at him. Still crying, but trying to compute his words. Maybe it was helping. “You know, that’s not a real problem. Consider yourself lucky that you don’t know real problems. Like your cheating ex-boyfriend showing up at your place of work.” Troy took a deep breath, swaying from side to side. “Little life advice, don’t start dating movie stars. Not worth the hassle. But that’s not anything you need to worry about.” He smiled at the kid, who was actually starting to calm down. “You just worry about getting some sleep. And the world’s going to look so much better when you wake up in the morning. And wake up only in the morning, yeah? Let your mama and daddy sleep through the night. Deal?”

A chuckle coming from the door had him turn around, where he found Harris with his phone out.

“Are you filming this?” Troy tried to keep his voice steady, to keep Milo from freaking out again.

“I’m sorry. When Cassie said that there’s Troy with a baby in the kitchen, I couldn’t help myself.”

“Not explaining the filming it.”

“You guys look freaking adorable. And Milo seems to really like you.”

“Yeah, what’s not to like?” Troy brushed up and down Milo’s back, as the kid’s head grew heavy against his shoulder. Still crying, still not falling asleep, but getting there.

“You’re so good with him,” Harris sighed. And Troy didn’t want to look up at his boyfriend, because when he sounded like that, he had those big eyes, all wet, and emotional, and Troy wasn’t quite sure he could take that today. At least not until they were in the safety of their home.

“Don’t you dare go all baby-fever on me,” Troy mumbled.

“I’m not. Not yet.” At that, Troy looked up. And found Harris looking just as emotional as expected, but also so calm. That this was a conversation for them to have at some point in the maybe not too far future. And the thought of that did light something deep inside Troy. Some sense of excitement, maybe. But also a sense of calm. That this was what they were heading towards. And that together. “At some point down the line.”

Troy couldn’t help the smile that spread. Yeah, they really were building a future together. “Ok.” That maybe wasn’t all that eloquent, but probably enough for now. Some point down the line. When there was a ring on their finger. When Troy was in a place to put down all those worries about turning out like his own father. With Harris, right by his side.

Luckily, Cassie decided to come back, because Troy had no idea how else to break the tension here. She did raise her eyebrow, looking from one to the other, maybe feeling some of that. She was kind enough not to comment on it, though. “You are an angel,” she smiled at Troy.

“So’s Milo.”

“When he wants to be,” Cassie chuckled. “But seems like someone’s ready to go to sleep for real now.”

“I did make a deal with him to sleep through the night,” Troy said, as he handed Milo back to his mother.

“Perfect. Thank you, Troy,” she smiled at him, resting her hand on her baby’s back. “Right, sweetie, let’s get you to your crib.”

“And let’s get you some food,” Harris said, holding out his hand to pull Troy towards the buffet, overflowing as usual. And the food was amazing as usual. And as long as he avoided a certain someone, the company was amazing as usual as well.

Eventually Troy ended up in the living room. One couch had Rozanov and Hollander sitting on it. Bood and Lisa Hayes sat on the other couch, with Hazy on the floor, leaning against his wife’s legs. Harris was on the chair, Troy on his lap, all the while his boyfriend brushed up and down his back. They weren’t usually that cuddled up, but they both felt the need to be territorial today. Rose and, not that he had paid him too much attention, Adrian were out on the patio somewhere, surrounded by big parts of their team. A few had already gone home, it was a schoolnight after all and quite a few of them had kids to look after.

“Here you go.” Cassie came back into the living room, after having gotten herself and Lisa another glass of wine. She did quickly glance at the baby monitor, before sitting half on the armrest, half on Bood’s lap.

“Don’t worry,” Troy chuckled, “I made a deal with him, remember?”

“Not doubting you,” Cassie laughed. “But come on. First time mom. I get to be nervous.”

“You’re the best fucking mom out there.” Bood wrapped his arm around her waist and put a kiss on her cheek.

“Thanks, hun,” she sighed, leaning into her husband’s embrace. “And hey,” she continued, “did my duty as mother of an adorable baby by spreading the baby fever.”

“Oh?” The whole group grinned at Troy. Great.

“Wanna tell us something?”

“Yes,” Troy deadpanned. “Harris is pregnant. It’s triplets.”

Harris shook with laughter that he muffled in Troy’s shoulder.

“Omigod!” Hazy beamed. “How did I not notice? Harris, you’re glowing.”

“Gee, thanks.”

“Wow, guys. Having babies out of wedlock.” Bood shook his head, just about managing to keep his grin down.

“This is why you had to skip work to go to doctor,” Rozanov deduced. “Wow, Troy, you cannot even go with your man to see baby doctor.”

“Who’s seeing a baby doctor?” Rose came over, squeezing herself between Shane and the armrest.

“Troy knocked Harris up,” Ilya explained.

“It’s triplets,” Shane continued, and with a big laugh, she leaned against his side.

“That’s amazing.”

“Wow, congratulations.” Troy immediately tensed at hearing Adrian’s voice. He turned to see him standing beside one of the couches. “What wonderful news,” he added, with a grin.

“Thanks.”

“You want to sit?” Lisa offered, already moving to make some room for him.

“No, thanks, I’ll be on my way now. I have no idea how you do this every day, I am already so sore and exhausted,” he chuckled. “I just wanted to say bye and thank you, so much. For this great evening, the amazing food, dude, that was great. And thanks for the pepper sauce, my husband will love it.” Right. His husband.

“No worries! Glad you enjoyed it.”

“I did. And thank you guys so much for practice, for all your help. I learned a lot today, and I don’t feel so worried about doing a hockey movie anymore.”

“Sure. You did well,” Rozanov nodded.

“Thanks, appreciate that. Right then.” He cleared his throat, before turning to Rose. “I probably won’t see you until next week?”

“That’s true.” Rose would spend a long weekend in Ottawa before having to be back in LA for some press thing. “But you have a good flight tomorrow!”

“Thanks. You enjoy your time here. And all of you.” He looked around the group. “Have a good evening and enjoy the rest of the night. And take care of yourselves.” At that, his eyes landed on Troy.

“You too.” Troy didn’t feel like returning the smile, but he looked Adrian in the eyes and that needed to be enough.

Adrian nodded, something in his eyes Troy wasn’t sure how to read. Maybe something apologetic. Maybe not. Something heavy for sure. He waved at the group once more, then turned and walked out of Bood’s place. And hopefully out of Troy’s life for good.

He let out a deep breath he hadn’t realized he was holding as he sank back against Harris’ chest.

“I am so proud of you,” Harris mumbled into his ear, his arms wrapped tightly around Troy. “So fucking proud.”

As thanks Troy kissed his cheek, before resting his head on Harris’ shoulder again.

It was silent for a few moments. Troy knew what was about to happen and braced himself for the questions that were about to hit him. Though he was curious, who of the bunch would be brave enough to ask.

It was Bood. “Are you finally gonna tell us what all this is about?”

Troy knew that they would accept a no. They’d say something along the lines of being there for him when he wanted someone to talk to, and that they had his back. Maybe it was that level of support that had Troy not caring whether they knew or not. Or maybe it was the fact that he was being loved so intensely by this wonderful man who brushed his hand up and down Troy’s back that made anything to do with Adrian easier. Clearly, Troy couldn’t put it all away just yet; that visit today had dredged up a lot and the next few days would be fun, sorting through all of that. But if there was one thing he had learned since his trade to Ottawa, it was that he didn’t need to carry it all by himself.

“Adrian and I dated for two years,” he answered, not moving from his safe space in Harris’ arms. “He broke up with me, and a few days later he publicly came out to announce his engagement to someone else.”

“Oh fuck that guy!”

“Buddy, that’s rough!”

“Sorry, man.”

Troy had to say, he did appreciate the sweet mix of commiserations and outrage on his behalf.

“And you skated with him!” Hazy sighed. “Dude, Cap made that whole rule about not showing moves to your ex!”

“Which wasn’t born from jealousy at all,” Rose mumbled under her breath.

“That was a very good and important rule,” he made clear, shooting Rose a look, ignoring the chuckling from the rest before turning to Troy. “You didn't have to do this.”

“But then I would have had to tell you about our history.”

“So? You should have said something, I would have kicked him out!”

“That’s why I didn’t tell you,” Troy sighed, turning his head to look at Roz. “Don’t get me wrong, I almost yelled at him on the ice. But I just didn’t want to make it a big deal.”

“It is a big deal.”

“It was a big deal,” Troy corrected, before beaming at his boyfriend. “And then I met Harris.”

“Aw!” Harris blushed ever so slightly, leaning over to kiss Troy.

“Who almost started shit on your behalf, by the way,” Rose chuckled. “Before seeing you introducing yourself to Adrian, I didn’t think you had this much potential to be scary.”

“When I probably should have been grateful,” Harris chuckled. “His fuck-up is my jackpot.”

“Our jackpot,” Troy grinned back.

“Uhm question.” Hazy sounded a bit unsure about whatever thought he had right now. “Adrian Dela Cruz came out around the time you were traded to Ottawa.”

So someone had done the math. The rest of the group did it now, too, and one face after the other fell.

“Oh shit.”

Troy couldn’t help but laugh at that. Not because the situation was particularly funny, but just so fucking bizarre. “Waiting on that question, Hazy.”

“That’s true then? All of that happened in like what, a week?”

“More or less, yeah,” Troy nodded.

“That explains so much.” Bood took a deep breath. “Fuck, dude.”

“No wonder you were acting like scared shelter cat,” Ilya continued. Troy just raised his eyebrow at Ilya’s comparison, but his friend wasn’t done yet. “I thought it was just asshole Kent, asshole Toronto and asshole father. But then also asshole cheater ex.”

“I think we all got it, so you don’t have to sum it up.” With a deep sigh, he buried himself in his boyfriend’s embrace again. “So, here we go. Fucked up backstory complete. But hey, all of that lead me right here. To you guys. To a great team, to great friends. To becoming a father of triplets.” That had all of them laughing, and the tension and worry slowly dissipated.

A comfortable silence fell over the group, that was broken by a deep sigh from Wyatt.

“What’s up, honey?” Lisa leaned over just a little, running her fingers through his hair.

“Mhm,” he sighed, leaning into his wife’s touch. “I just realized I need to find myself a new favourite superhero show.”

“What?” Yeah, Troy had known before today that Wyatt really loved the show Adrian had been on. But that hadn’t bothered him. Not too bad anyways. Not bad enough that Wyatt needed to find something else! “You really don’t need to do that, Hazy, it’s really…”

“Nah,” he waved him off. “For one, you’re my boy, and I got your back. Also, I don’t think I could really enjoy the show now. Besides,” he shrugged, “I’ve always been more of a DC fan anyways.”

“Ehem,” Rose cleared her throat, raising her eyebrow at him.

“DC and X-Squad,” he quickly corrected himself, as everyone else bit down their chuckles. “X-Squad obviously, I mean, yeah, it’s the best. Totally.”

“I know it’s not, but that was really cute,” Rose laughed.

“Come on, it…”

“Did not make any sense,” Rose finished for Hazy. “It really didn’t. And that blue paint was torture.”

“I can only imagine how horrible that must have been day after day,” Lisa chuckled. “I mean, I only did that once and…”

“Babe!” Hazy hissed, all of a sudden blushing at a level Troy hadn’t known Hazy could blush.

“Don’t tell me you’re embarrassed,” she grinned. “Trust me, there is nothing you need to be embarrassed about that night.”

“About what night, Hazy?” Bood asked, the teasing undertone in his voice matching the raised eyebrow.

Wyatt hid his face behind his hands, just shaking his head.

“You know we are making up the scenario in our mind right now, yeah?” Rozanov grinned. “So you might as well tell the truth, because it cannot be worse than what I am thinking now.”

“For fuck’s sake,” he groaned. He dropped his hands took a deep breath but did not look at anyone in particular. “I would like the record to state that this happened way before a certain movie came out, ok? But maybe, just maybe, teenaged Wyatt Hayes got a little bit of a crush after reading the X-Squad comics on a certain blue-skinned mutant. And maybe that teenage-crush stayed into adulthood. And maybe that guy got so incredibly lucky that he met the most amazing woman, who for his birthday one year went all out. With blue paint, yellow contacts, the whole thing. And maybe that night was completely incredibly amazing. And maybe it took two weeks until we got all the blue paint off of everywhere,” he laughed, looking up at Lisa.

“Was worth the hassle,” she grinned right back.

“Oh absolutely. I mean, I was already looking for rings at that point but after that night I knew I was absolutely ruined for all other women.” Lisa leaned over to kiss his head, and the blush on Hazy’s cheeks was now definitely due to love, and no longer due to embarrassment. “But it did not have anything to do with you,” he was quick to add, turning to Rose, who was grinning from ear to ear. “I don’t know if that makes it better or worse. Or whichever option is more flattering. But yeah.”

“Hey, at least one person here had a good time being Mystique. I for sure didn’t,” she snorted, leaning back against Shane’s side. “I guess the only good thing about that movie was meeting my favourite ex-boyfriend.” She glanced up at him, and he grinned right back.

“So both Hollander and Hazy dated Mystique. Good for you, guys,” Harris chuckled.

“I’m just glad I didn’t have to deal with the blue paint. Us in bed was already enough of a catastrophe without that on top,” Shane all but shuddered.

“Yes, please, tell us more about sleeping with your ex.” Ilya rolled his eyes. Almost good-naturedly, but there was something below there. Some lingering jealousy.

“Ilya.” Shane turned to him, waiting until Rozanov locked eyes until he said something or other in Russian. And, as he always did when Shane spoke Russian, Rozanov started beaming from ear to ear.

“True,” he nodded, planting a kiss on Shane’s cheek. “And I guess I am happy also that you are in our life,” he said, gesturing half-heartedly towards Rose. “But he is mine.” Of course that had to be added onto there; Rozanov was possessive as fuck.

“Damn,” Troy snorted, “I’m really glad now that I never asked you for Hollander’s number.”

“Excuse me?” All eyes were on Troy, a mix between confused, amused and slightly angry.

“What?” he shrugged. “I was stuck in Ottawa, miserable, heart-broken, and ready to do anything to get over Adrian. Heard the rumour that Shane’s gay, and thought that maybe Ilya would help a bro out.”

“You wanted my husband’s number.”

“He wasn’t your husband then. And I didn’t know you were dating. All I knew was that I wanted to get laid and that Hollander’s hot.”

Roz just stared at him, unblinking.

“You can calm down again, Roz. Outside of friendship, and being teammates and all that, I have no interest in your husband. I’m good,” he added, snuggling a little closer against Harris. He couldn’t keep the little grin down, though. It was too much fun to rile Roz up.

“Thank you, Troy,” Bood sighed, “practice tomorrow is gonna be a bitch.” Yeah, he was probably right about that. Well.

“Look guys, don’t take this the wrong way.” Hazy looked from Shane to Troy. “But I really don’t see it. Like sure, you’d be hot together, but Troy, you are not even close to being enough of a freak for Hollander.”

As Troy started laughing, Shane and Ilya looked at each other a little confused. “I’m not sure but that didn’t feel like a compliment. To either of us.”

“I don’t think it was supposed to be,” Rose supplied oh so very helpfully, laughing along with Troy.

“Can’t say I disagree. But back then my intention for sure wasn’t asking Hollander out to become boyfriends.”

“You are only interested in his body, hm?” Ilya raised his eyebrow. “I mean, I understand, is very nice body, very flexible, can do very…”

“No,” Hollander made clear, plastering his hand over Ilya’s mouth, as a blush rose on his face. “Just no.”

“Aw, come on now, it’s just getting good,” Lisa laughed. “Rose? You got anything to add?”

“She does not!” Shane made clear.

“Yeah, I’m kinda hoping to crash in their guestroom for the next few nights, so I probably shouldn’t piss them off any more than necessary,” was her shrugged response.

“Girl, you’re welcome to crash at our place, if Roz kicks you out,” Hazy grinned.

“That is good to know. In all honesty though, I don’t think I’m the right person to ask what Shane can do in bed.”

“Why not?” Bood asked, apparently a little slow on the uptake here, and Troy couldn’t keep the giggle in at that.

“Hun,” Cassie chuckled, running her fingers through his hair.

“What?” He locked eyes with his wife, who was just grinning at him, not saying anything, waiting for him to figure it out. And it might be classified as almost embarrassingly long until he did. “Oh. Right.”

“There you go,” she smiled. Cassie leaned over to put a kiss on his head, and Bood leaned against her, the softest smile.

“Ok, whose turn is it now?” Hazy grinned. “To talk about their sexlife, I mean. We had ours, we had the Rozanov-Hollander-Landry-whatever. Barrett?” He locked eyes.

And Troy met the look head-on. “Triplets, Hazy. Triplets.” His whole body vibrated, as Harris stifled his laughter against Troy’s shoulder. “Do I have to say more?”

“Would only be fair, after our roleplay was discussed, but whatever.” He rolled his eyes a little overdramatically, before turning to Bood and Cassie.

“We have a small child. You really think we’re keeping up with you childfree people?”

“Yeah, that’s fair enough. But hey, if you ever want to have some time to yourself, Harris and Troy got babyfever.” Troy made sure that Hazy saw the eyeroll, but it didn’t deter him, he continued with the widest grin. “I’m certain they’d love to babysit for you, so you can get laid.”

“We absolutely can watch him, give you guys some time to yourself,” Harris smiled over. “But not because of baby fever, but because we are kind people, who’d like to help out their friends.”

“Sure thing,” Rozanov grinned. “Only reason.”

“Really, Roz?” Troy shot back. “You tease us about baby fever, when you drop everything if it means you can babysit for Hayden Pike?”

“Is to make sure the children will have a good influence,” he shrugged. “It's a hard life when you have a mediocre hockey player as father.”

“I will never understand your vendetta against Pike. Dude’s a really good hockey player. I mean, he’s first line winger for a reason. And that A on his jersey didn’t get there on accident.”

“That’s just latent jealousy,” Rose threw in, before Rozanov could complain some more about Pike. “Because Pike got to spend time with Shane, when Ilya couldn’t.”

Shane quickly put his hand in front of Ilya’s mouth again, saying something in Russian to keep him from arguing.

It worked. For almost ten seconds. Then Ilya said: “I believe it is clear that the Ottawa Centaurs will not be watching this hockey movie, because both leads upset people in the team.”

As every face, unbelieving written all over them, turned to Rozanov, Troy just buried his face in Harris’ chest. Mostly to keep from laughing, though. That drama queen.

“Are you really calling Rose as bad as Adrian right now?” Harris asked, quietly, but with an edge in his voice that could be considered threatening. Troy considered it mostly sexy.

“Oh, I see what you meant with scary Harris.” Bood took him in, his eyes a little wide.

And Rozanov got that this was not something he should joke about. “I am sorry. Obviously not. He is asshole. You are…”

“A bitch?” Rose supplied, with a grin.

“Sometimes,” Roz shrugged.

“That’s why you like me so much.”

“I will not confirm or deny. But I think the point stands, maybe we will skip this movie,” he said, sounding almost apologetic there towards Rose.

“Yeah, it’s not that simple,” Harris sighed. “The whole publicity aspect of this thing, of you guys training with us today, is a whole contract with a whole bunch of conditions. Part of that was that you guys did interviews after training. It was that the publicity guys could take as many pictures as they wanted, and are allowed to post them. It also requires us to post some stuff, once this is all public, and show some level of public support. Meaning we will not be able to actively boycott that movie as a whole. There will have to be Centaurs at that premiere and maybe even at some press events. It’s not gonna be everyone, but Shane, there’s no way in hell you can miss that premiere, your friendship with Rose is gonna be the base of the whole PR campaign. Rozanov and Bood, you guys are our captains. You gotta represent. And then it depends. Maybe some will be invited directly, because of popularity, or level of fame. Maybe they’ll say: please bring five players to the event. And maybe they’ll invite hockey players from other teams that are really famous. And…” He took a deep breath, as he brushed through Troy’s hair. “I don’t know if I’ll be able to skip it. I’ll probably have to work that whole thing, for the Cens.”

Ugh. “Why do you have to be the best at your job?” Troy sighed, leaning into the touch. “Can I pre-emptively call in sick for that day? No offence,” he gestured half-heartedly in Rose’s direction, “but I don’t want to see him on the big screen. Unless he gets punched in the face, slips on a banana peel and falls face first into the dirt?” He glanced over at Rose, whose face was meek enough that that was nothing but a weak hope. Damnit.

“Yes, really though, what is this movie about?”

“You know that I’m not allowed to tell you.”

“I promise we’re good at keeping secrets,” Wyatt offered. “Even us straight people.”

“Just the cliff notes?” Shane asked, and that had Rose’s face falling.

“Et tu?” she groaned.

“You know how good I am at keeping secrets,” he shrugged.

“Ok, fine. If this gets out, I will kill each and every one of you, just so you know,” she made clear, and Troy was pretty sure that she wasn’t kidding. “Here goes. My character, Esme has a little brother, Toby, and they are struggling financially, but all her little brother wants is to skate, so they go to some local outreach program. Adrian’s character, Louis, is an MLH player and a snobby dick, who wrecked his reputation after some video of him being an asshole goes viral.” Oh no. “So to get his image back to being a positive role model, he is basically sentenced by team management, to do outreach like that.” No, no, no. Troy was going to be sick. “Esme and Louis meet there and fall for each other and there are ups and downs, but eventually his image recovers, he wins the Stanley Cup, and they live happily ever after.”

This had to be some fucked up dream Troy was having right now. Every single descriptor of that just felt like a stab to the heart. A hockey player, going viral for being an asshole, learning to better himself with the help of someone they fall in love with? This had to be some sick joke.

 “No.” It took Troy a moment to realize that he had been the one to break the silence that had fallen over that room. “I’m not watching that movie. I’m sorry, Rose, but no.”

“It’s ok,” Rose nodded, and smiled in a way that was genuinely reassuring. “You don’t have to. I get it.”

“Thanks.”

“The MLH has their fingers all over that, don’t they?”

“A hundred percent!”

“This sucks.” God, Troy’s mind started racing. Adrian would play, what, a better version of Troy? Someone who fucked up, sure, but played by the commissioner’s rules, didn’t make a stir, did some little bit of practicing with kids and all’s well? That was so fucked. Fucked enough that Troy’s mind went even worse places. “Do you think Crowell did it on purpose?”

“Did what on purpose?”

“Get us involved with this fucking film. I mean most of the headlines the MLH has made as of late haven’t been great. The whole shit with Kent? The wave of homophobia when any of us comes out, especially the whole Montreal bullshit? The league needs positive PR, especially if he can control it, right? And positive PR that isn’t queer. So he had to have been involved before Rose was cast, knew that would get the whole thing to Ottawa, where three of his least favourite players are playing, who he coincidentally tried to threaten before, but couldn’t. But now we’re forced to be a part of that and we are forced to be supportive of this whole thing.” Fuck, he started to sound like a damn conspiracy theorist, but his brain was moving too fast for him to stop himself. His skin was buzzing with energy, with rage, with something else he couldn’t quite identify that moment. So it maybe sounded completely insane, but what were the chances?

“Honestly? I wouldn’t put it past him,” Hazy nodded. Ok, he had Hazy at least on his side, that was a good sign. Noone was more perceptive than him. Then again Hazy was also always ready to jump on the insanity train.

“Excuse me, threatened you guys?” Rose’s face fell, looking around the group.

“Yeah,” Hollander sighed. “He first cornered me after I came out to my team, then threatened to kick me and Ilya out of the league after we were outed, unless we’d say it was a hoax and get back in the closet.”

“And he went after Troy, when he started promoting women’s shelters, and organizations for victims of sexual assault,” Harris explained in Troy’s stead. “Real fucking peach that guy.”

“Oh, fuck him!” She got up and walked over to their chair, sat down on the armrest and grabbed Troy’s hand. “Dude, I’m so happy you didn’t falter with that. I’ve been a hockey fan my whole life basically. And… I told you how all my brothers play hockey and I don’t. Partly because of reasons of sexism. And I have seen a lot. Heard a lot. And when you spoke up that changed some things. And I do know of people who were influenced and got help because of your posts on social media. And I do know that it changed things in my brother John’s team. And I’m so sorry that you were threatened over that but I’m also really grateful for what you did and what you’re doing.”

Luckily, Rose stopped talking there. Because the tears that were filling Troy’s eyes were threatening to spill and he did not want to break down here. Not in front of all of them, not like this. “Felt like the least I could do, you know, after all the shit I pulled.”

“That is absolutely true. But, and I’m not trying to shade anyone here, the rest of the Ottawa team didn’t post that stuff until you did. Most players in the league don’t speak out or post support. So it matters, Troy.”

Not sure what else to do, he just nodded. This was getting way too much, way too emotional. Too emotional for the level of spiral he had reached; there were a few more downwards turns to complete, before he would completely break down. Which also meant that he should probably get out of here. Because whatever would happen next would be a lot of things but not pretty. And he really would like to be in his own home for that. And have no one around. No one but Harris.

Rose smiled, squeezed his hand a little, and got back up again and rejoined Hollander and Rozanov on the couch. The air was a little tense in the room, no one really knew what to say, or what to do. And it killed Troy to no end. The prickle in his skin morphed dangerously close to an itch, his eyes were genuinely burning now. He was suffocating in this silence, this house, and he all but jumped off Harris’ lap.

“I need some fresh air,” he pressed out, directed at nobody in particular, and just went straight for the patio. Where at least ten people were sitting, grinning at him, unaware of what had just happened inside.

“Barrett,” Chouinard grinned. Selena sat on his lap, snuggled up just like Troy had just been with Harris, but relaxed. “Wanna join us?”

“Yeah, we can make some room.” Haas scooted over, gesturing at the space between himself and LaPointe.

“Thanks guys,” Troy smiled back, trying his all to sound calm and collected and not like his heart was beating at twice the normal rate. “I just need to get some stuff from the car.” That was hopefully enough for them, and he walked on without giving them the chance to react.

At the car he would be out of sight and would therefore be able to let go of that tension, of all these confounding feelings, of that fucking tornado in his mind. At least enough for him to get it back together, and go back in there, and have a nice evening with his teammates. His friends. They were all his friends in there. Friends he deserved to have. Because he had done the work. He had done everything he could to work himself out of that shithole that had been his Toronto persona. He didn’t need all this bullshit haunting him now.

He didn’t need that.

He didn’t want that.

He did not deserve that.

Did he deserve that?

He did deserve that, didn’t he?

“Hey, baby.” Did he deserve that sweet fucking man, who undoubtedly was about to take the best fucking care of Troy? He turned to Harris, sidling up to him, holding out Troy’s jacket he had left inside. “Time to head home?”

Yeah. That was a good idea. “Can we just disappear or do we need to say bye to everyone?”

“Who cares.” Harris gently nudged Troy’s arm, before heading to the driver’s side. “Let’s just go.”

The didn’t talk during the drive home. Harris had his hand on Troy’s thigh, brushing back and forth with his thumb. Soothing. And grounding. That’s what that was. And all Troy really could stomach right about now. He first had to get his thoughts under control before he’d be able to talk about it, and because Harris was the best, he just got it and let Troy be for now, let him stare out into the night, the blurring streetlights matching his general disposition of everything being a bit too much.

They didn’t talk as they got home, as they walked into the house. They didn’t talk as they brushed their teeth, as they got ready for bed, as they changed into their PJs. Troy just couldn’t. It all felt so big, too much, threatening to spill over. Harris didn’t try to fill the silence, not with words a least. But he stayed close. A hand on Troy’s lower back as e reached over to grab his towel. His side all but pressed against Troy’s as they stood side by side, brushing their teeth. Smiling, as he gently reached up to rub a bit of lotion, Troy had missed, into his cheek.

They didn’t talk as they got into bed. Troy climbed in, curling himself against Harris, his face against Harris’ chest, and being almost immediately safely enveloped in his boyfriend’s arms. Where he was safe.

“I’m sorry,” he said. Maybe because he wasn’t sure what else to say, but because there was a lot to apologize for, right? After all, Harris, with his sweet laugh, and cheesy puns and big heart deserved at least that much from someone like Troy.

Harris’ hand moved, and his fingers threaded through Troy’s hair. His voice was calm and steady as he answered. “There are a few people that probably need to apologize today. I can’t think of a single reason why you should be one of them.”

“I… I just am.” Fuck figuring out the perfect eloquent way of getting his thoughts out there, they were far from eloquent, and if they came out a jumbled mess then so be it. Maybe that was what Troy was apologizing for. For whatever he was about to say probably not making too much sense. “Today sucked. So much of today sucked. Seeing him sucked. Because I thought I dealt with it. I got over it. But it’s not just Adrian and the way he dumped me. Or cheated on me. It’s everything else that happened then, that happened before then that’s so fucked up. Like no matter how much I’m trying not to be that asshole that I was in Toronto, it doesn’t erase the fact that I was that. I was actively spouting homophobic bullshit, while falling in love with Adrian. And I was in love with him, that was real. My feelings were real. And still, I was like… that. Kent’s little errand boy. And I caused so much harm. So much, and…” Troy took a deep breath, trying to calm his racing heartbeat and maybe stop his prickling eyes from tearing up. “I know that no one deserves to get cheated on. I really do. But Toronto-Troy… He didn’t deserve a happy end.”

That made Harris halt. Not in a big way, he didn’t go stiff, he didn’t retract his hands, but he was wrapped tightly enough around Troy for him to feel even the slightest shift. There was something he would want to say to that. So Troy waited him out.

“What about Ottawa-Troy? Does he deserve a happy end?”

Troy twisted ever so slightly so he was able to look Harris in the face. That beautiful face, filled with so much love. “Pretty sure that Ottawa-Troy already found his happily-ever-after. As for deserving it… He’s working on it.”

Harris brushed his fingers through Troy’s hair again, letting them trail down towards his cheek. “This particular happy end believes a little more in that whole unconditional love thing. You know, where it’s not a price you have to earn.”

“That’s pretty fucking generous.” Troy could not keep the eye contact. Not when Harris was that intense. So he curled himself back together against Harris’ chest.

“Just giving back what I’m getting. Look, working on being a better person, a better ally, less of a homophobic douchebag… That's important. Really fucking important. And yeah, your seriousness about growing as a person, about making a difference, and that not to make yourself look better but because you actually believe in it… That’s really attractive. And is for sure one of the reasons I love you. But the amount of how much I love you, which is a fuckton by the way-“ Troy couldn’t help the giggle, though through the tears that were starting to collect in his eyes it sounded slightly choked up “-that is not in relation to your parameter of becoming a better person. And you know, since it’s my love to give, I can decide who is deserving of that. And I decide that you, Troy Barrett, deserve all of it.”

That was it with keeping the tears somewhat contained and all of it, the pain of Adrian, the ghosts of Toronto-Troy, the fuckton of absolutely overwhelmingly amazing love, it all broke out as he cried against Harris’ chest. Who just pulled him closer, his face pressed into Troy’s hair, peppering his head with kisses.

Troy must’ve fallen asleep like that; when he woke up again he was still firmly wrapped up in Harris’ arms. His boyfriend still had to be sleeping, a few little snores popped up in his calm and slow breathing. It was still dark all around them, had to be the middle of the night. There however was something heavy on his legs. That was what must’ve woken him. Carefully, not to wake Harris, he twisted just enough to see Chiron, snuggled up against them.

“You’re not supposed to be on the bed, mister,” Troy whispered. But the dog was not deterred. Instead, he just repositioned himself, resting his head on Troy’s thigh. And he just did not have it in himself to tell Chiron to get lost. To send him to his bed. Because, fuck. Despite this being just too fucking cute, it was also too fucking calming. And maybe it was ok for Troy to seek out the comfort of both his beloved boyfriend and beloved furball. “Ok, just this once,” he chuckled and scratched Chiron’s head. “But if Harris asks, I told you no, yeah?”

Troy decided to understand the content little sigh from Chiron as agreement to that deal. “Good boy,” he sighed, and cuddled back against Harris. And this time around, Troy fell asleep with the widest smile on his face.

And that smile only widened, when the next morning he was greeted by a text message from Cassie:

Milo stuck to your deal
slept through the whole night
you are an absolute godsent and now our favourite babysitter
and you’re gonna make a really great dad to your triplets ❤️ ❤️ ❤️